In case you didn't notice: I might discuss rather heavy topics in this and will use colloquial, sometimes vulgar language because this is a dark universe that cannot be described with happy words from time to time. Just to make sure you get that. Have fun <3

Chapter 42 – Preparations

I told Minhyuk not to mention a thing to Exo the next day but he only raised a brow at me. “You'd better have a good reason for this.”

“They have a spy”, I retorted without hesitation. “Lay. His real name is Yixing. I uncovered him when we were there back then.”

Minhyuk blinked and stayed silent for several seconds before a disbelieving snort escaped his lips. “And you didn't find it necessary to tell me about that insignificant detail, yeah?”

“Would it have changed a thing? No. But it's important now, so, please?”

“How did you-”

“He's got an accent and reacted to Chinese, there was no mistaking”, I shrugged before fixing my firm gaze on him. “That's why if any of the Exo members get to know something about a revolt it won't last long. That's when they'll kill us for real. So be oblivious.” I stressed the last part and he finally seemed to get it with a nod, causing me to relax.

And as expected everything went well. Suho, having left Chanyeol at home this time, complained about our prices but never seemed to be too serious about it. He knew he had no say in this, so he just accepted things as they were and left soon after that.

“I'll go visit Namjoon”, I muttered as we were watching the gang leader's retreating figure. “I want to hear what information he's got.”

Minhyuk had his hands buried in his pockets and sighed in suppressed discontent. “You know, I still don't like this idea of initiating things-”

“-and you will not support things we start. We should wait for a sign, anything, right? I knew you'd say that. I'll go anyway.”

He glanced at me and his lips. “It's weird how well you can read me, since when has it been like that? It's kinda scary.”

“Don't worry, I find it scary as well”, I mumbled in reply before turning around. “See you later then.”

“That punk-” I knew Minhyuk was shaking his fist at me halfheartedly without having to look as his voice trailed off and a moment of silence passed. “Don't be gone too long.”

A smirk tugged at the corner of my mouth but I just waved it off with my hand, disappearing behind the next house's corner.

“You want to occupy a radio station?”

I leaned back on my improvised seat of blankets and wood to examine Namjoon's serious expression when he nodded. “It's the best way to spread the word. We need a certain range and the radio provides it. There's a station about two days away from here, what do you say?”

“Me?” I chewed on my bottom lip. “It's possible, depending on the kind of people you have. How many are there?”

“Gangs of that area, former policemen, families. Choose your favorite. We've been observing the building through them for some time now and we know how it is guarded, know every entrance. We're prepared.”

I nodded with a hum, going it over in my head. “Do you know about the inside?”

“We do have the blueprints but it would be better to have someone get in and shut off the cameras, just to be sure. The later they ring the alarm the more time we have.”

And it would be best if there wasn't an alarm to begin with, I finished his statement in my thoughts, resting my elbows on my knees. I had promised Minhyuk that we would get over with everything as a group but I already had to stretch that rule less than twenty-four hours later. “I-”

“We already have an ace in terms of infiltration in our rows, he's a deserter. You don't have to come with us but the more the merrier, right?” Namjoon managed a quiet chuckle and I lifted the corner of my mouth without letting any emotion reach my eyes. I could see them in his, amusement as well as nervousness, but more than anything else I could see confidence and certainty.

He knew what he was doing, it reminded me of the leaders of our little army groups. Confident, but never over the top. The way they presented things would always cause one to feel safe because it seemed to be idiot-proof. I suppressed a shiver and swallowed. Don't trust the way it looks but the way it works. “When?”

“At the end of next week, probably.” Namjoon mirrored my pose and I knew he did it on purpose to get me over to his side. It was basic psychology I had learned about long ago and I could just huff quietly.

“I won't say count me in”, I replied, still making sure to hold our eye contact, “but I'll try to be there. I'll talk to you again next Wednesday to tell you about my final decision.”

He nodded again, standing up shortly after I did and I bowed my head a little before pacing up the stairs of the subway. “Hyungwon?” I glanced back. “I want Hoseok back. I'm missing a sheep in my stable.”

Was that cute or more of a pragmatic use? The more sheep the more force against China, I guess. I blinked to get the malicious thoughts out of my head. Namjoon was a man of plans and thoughts but he could still miss his gang member like a brother. Who was I to judge his possible intentions? So I cleared my throat and walked towards the street again without giving him anything else than a low: “I bet you do.”

Of course Minhyuk fired questions at me as soon as I stepped into our house while Jooheon remained absent for the day. Kihyun and Changkyun were home and I decided that it was time to tell them about the near future, connecting my explanation with answering Minhyuk's questions. I told them about the war, the way I imagined our revolution (briefly, of course) and Namjoon's plan.

Repeating his words, I felt my confidence grow. Yes, this was a good plan. Once we owned a radio station we could reach so many people at once. “And that's where we are now.” I smiled a little and nodded to end my monologue.

Minhyuk pressed his lips together for a moment and shook his head. “You're planning on helping them.”

“I told you I would do whatever it takes-”

“You told me we would do this toge-” He stopped in the middle of his sentence, maybe not knowing how to say it when I stared at him with an unwavering gaze. “I-” He fumbled with his words for a few seconds before falling completely silent. He had to retreat because he had lost the battle this time; I could do whatever I wanted after all.

Kihyun inhaled audibly, drawing my attention towards him while Minhyuk sat on his chair in silence. “I'm not going to go back to what I was, I won't kill people anymore. I'm sorry, Hyungwon, but just remembering all those people I had to assassinate before...” He clenched and unclenched his fist. “I support you and your decisions, it really is our only chance, but I can't help you, I'm sorry.”

I swallowed and nodded a little when Changkyun turned towards his best friend, disappointed for a moment. Then an idea seemed to come to his mind and he tapped Kihyun's arm. “You won't have to fight, I'll do that. You could just stay somewhere safer than the open battlefield. There need to be doctors who can help us when we're hurt and it sounds like a job for you, what do you say?”

“ You will-” Another five seconds passed during which I actually appreciated how quickly our youngest could think situations over to turn them to his advantage. That's probably because he's used to changing plans whenever he gets caught stealing, I thought, suppressing a roll of my eyes when Kihyun clicked his tongue. “It could work. I...I'll see what I can do. But I know I cannot fight other people. I've had enough of that.”

“Understandable”, I agreed with another nod, confident this time as he looked more convinced as well.

“Great.” Minhyuk pushed himself away from the table and stood up to go to his room. “That's exactly what being left behind is.”

“Minhyuk, that's not-” I rose to my feet in a hurry and tried to grab his wrist but he was out of reach before I knew it and left the three of us in the room without looking back. “-true.”

Kihyun examined my face with a frown and I tried not to let my discontent show but he saw right through it with a deep sigh. “Left behind? We'd all fight our battles, what's his problem?”

“You can't stick together, no matter how you are fighting. He doesn't seem to know that, he's missing the experience”, I mumbled, letting my eyes wander across the room before sitting down again. “There's no advantages to war in his eyes. None.”

“And you're concerned about something like that?”, Kihyun retorted with a raised brow while Changkyun rested his head on top of his crossed arms on the table.

“True, he'll notice soon enough if there's an actual war coming”, the youngest mentioned with a slight shrug. “Why do you even care?”

“But-” I clenched my fist, chewing on my lower lip as I realized how their words were true. I hadn't thought about it yet, but all I had tried to do was make the idea of war acceptable for Minhyuk. Why though? Why would him approving of something inevitable even matter? “But still-”

I didn't manage to form a sentence and Kihyun sighed once more, running his hand through Changkyun's brown hair with a frown. “I don't get your relationship anymore”, he mumbled before pulling at a strand of hair, narrowing his eyes. “We need to cut your hair, Kyun, this won't do.”

I let out an involuntary growl and stood up again, moving towards the stairs at the entrance. “Don't worry, I don't get it either.”

I decided to leave Minhyuk alone, not wanting to force more nightmare scenarios on him. Kihyun's comment had been eligible – why did I care to start with? So I stopped in front of Shownu's door for the first time, sitting down with my back leaning against it. “Hey, Shownu. Are you there? It's me, Hyungwon.”

Of course he is there, idiot, he basically hasn't left that room for three days. I heard some rustling coming from behind the door and swallowed. “I don't know if anyone told you yet, Minhyuk, Jooheon, I don't know, but you should be pr