dead end

MissLovergirl360

Title:

The title is very much suited with your story, though it doesn’t sounds very common, it also doesn’t sounds very much attractive and special so I have to deduct one point for that. Of course, every title is very special indeed for its story, however, from a reader’s point of view, I don’t really feel anything charming, something appealing, something to make me instantly click your story, but of course the pairing or the main characters would say otherwise. [4/5]

Foreword/ Description:

By reading the description, the first part where it stated that the story is set 50 years in the future, it certainly has its own charm to make people curious about what’s going to happen in the future, what’s going to happen to the characters, and what exactly will be presented years after? And seeing how you put the sentence where people are all about themselves, it gives off the vibe that people 50 years from now are very selfish and only live for themselves, but according to the short introduction about Tao, it says otherwise. Seeing how he has a stable life, a boyfriend, it shows that his life is pretty much against the odds of other people and somehow that is something positive to make people read it because a person that’s different from everyone else is what makes the story even more interesting. It’s a contrast and of course, good points should be given for it. The foreword doesn’t give me much to say, so I am mainly focused on the description because it’s what readers will look at first. To make it simple, I have a very good thought that it’s attractive. [13/15]

Plotline:

Of course, considering that you don’t have that many number of chapters yet, I can’t really judge more than what’s given or written but hands up for you because the plot is as seen is originally yours, and with sparkles of plot twist and a complicated storyline, plus the owned poem, I have to give high marks for it. To say more about the plots would be long, and mostly are all positive remarks since I rarely find the same kind of plot as yours, unique is a yes, cliché is a no, but if you were to know more about it, feel pleased to contact me. [18/20]

Flow Of The Story:

The flow of the story is important as it’s what makes the readers more interested to read. And from what I’ve seen, judged and read, the flow of the story is quite slow and is making readers kind of feel impatient, hence the number of chapters posted, so I would like to advise not to focus too much on other backgrounds but rather more into the story itself. Reading the story, I’ve noticed how you put every kind of details and the chapters are of course quite a satisfying length that would please readers, however, what’s more important is the characters and the story so please look more into it and I’m sure you could improvise, nevertheless, it wasn’t irritating as well so the points shouldn’t be very much deducted. [16/20]

Character Development:

In my point of view as both a reader and a reviewer, your characters are very easy to understand. I mean, we don’t really want a super complicated bipolar character that change all the time and can’t be understand at all, right? The development aren’t very much seen in progress, because the story hasn’t fully grow much yet, but so far so good so keep it up. [13/15]

Grammar & Spelling:

The grammar and the spelling are almost flawless or rather perfect actually. As someone whose first language is English, if I am not mistaken but forgive me if I’m wrong, it isn’t a problem for a story without grammar that would make people cringe or spelling errors that would make people wail so full marks for that great achievement. [15/15]

Overall Enjoyment:

Honestly speaking, the story catch reader’s attention the more one read more about it and it managed to have my attention as well considering how I’m very picky when reading a story, especially when it’s rated. It would be very awesome if the story is either completed or have more chapters. One thing that I could reassure, Dead End could be not at all eye-catching at first, but the more you’re into it, it would be very worth reading. [9/10]

Score: 89/100
(Please correct me if I'm wrong ^^)

Reviewer’s notes: Thank you very much for requesting and I hope you are satisfied with the review, I tried my best and I hope it is up to your heart content and that you have what you want from the review. I apologize for any mistakes and the delay; I’ve been very busy with exam lately. I hope to see you again and all the best for your story!

upperclass themes 2014 ©