After one last check over in the hospital, I was free to go home. My heart pounded with relief as I climb into Luhan's car waiting outside for me. He at in driver's seat waiting quietly and ooked over at me when I climbed in, smiling brightly at me.

"Sehun-ah, how are you feeling now?" He said, lightly resting a hand on my knee.

As soon as his fingertips land on my knee I feel nerves gnaw at my insides. "Good, thank you hyung."

Luhan stared at me for a moments, assesing me almost to see if I was really good. Seeming satisfied, his hand left my knee and went to the car key in the key hole. I waited for the purr of the engine to come, but it didn't come. I stared out at the hospital parking lot, snow melted over the ground in a grey slush, the sky above grey.

"Sehun, you fainted because of something to do with your past right?"

My stomach done a flip and my hands made fists in my lap. I look into Luhan's questioning eyes, desperate for som way out of this. I didn't want anyone to know about my past, what my father had done to me and Kaisoo, what ended up hapening to both of them.

Luhan's hand came to rest upon my cheek. "It's okay," He said. "You can tell me."

Eventually after debating whether or not I shoul admit to it, I nod.

"I tought so," Luhan said. "Do you want to tell me what about your past it was?"

I drew a shakey breath, "Luhan-I'm....It's, I..."

"Okay, okay that's okay. If you don't want to tell me I'm totally okay with that," He gave me a smile.  

I press my cheek into his hand, "I want to tell you, that's the thing, but I can't bring myself to say the words, they-they hurt too much."

He my cheek lightly with his thumb, "Oh Sehun, what are you hiding."

I feel a tear slip out of my eye. "Everyone I loved is dead-" I said suddenly, suprsing myself as it slipped out.

Luhan's eyebrows met at the centre, "What?!" He said breathlessly.

"My dad, my mum, my brother-Kaisoo. I'm the only one of them that survived, but I as good as dead, I mean look at me. I can't even go a day without dying inside because of it."

"Sehun-" Luhan said breathlessly again.

Tears fell like a waterfall out of me. Pain tore at my heart, ripping what was left of it into tatters.

"I'm sorry Sehun-" Both his hands were on my face, wiping the tears away. "I'm so so sorry."

I squeeze my eyes shut, "Take me home Luhan. Please!" I said weakly.

**

Neither of us said anything on the drive home,