[Jay]

 

I sat along with Junho and Wooyoung on the rooftop. We had nothing to do and the night was about to break in. I stared at Wooyoung who looked like he was enjoying day dreaming about that Jae Yeon girl we met earlier, Junho on the other hand had that face on; the face when someone feels like it's the end of the world. What about me you ask? I was thinking about Ellie.

 

Seeing her, today brought so much memories, don't get me wrong I'm not reminiscing it's just, I feel like along the way of our relationship before; I was wrong too. I don't know why I'm even bothering thinking about her, I have so much priorities that I need to focus on, for example helping Soomi find that guy who saved her that night. There's 0.0000000000001 percent that it was me but then again it could be me. Who knows only time will tell.

 

“Oh yeah hyung” Wooyoung started after finishing his day dream marathon.

 

“What?”

 

“Where have you been lately? I feel like I don't see you as often as I should be seeing you” he continued.

 

“Busy outside, I'm helping a friend of mine with some stuff so I just stay out for a couple of hours” I lied.

 

“You have a friend?” Junho joked. I punched him lightly on the arm and he smiled. I guess the boys aren't so use to me going out without them. Before my path and Soomi's path crossed, my life revolved around being the leader of the legendary 2PM and the being a good example to the kids out there. I never had time for myself or to go out with friends from college.

 

This is my destiny and this is what I chose.

 

“There you guys are” I heard Nichkhun said. Me, Wooyoung and Junho turned around in unison and found the rest of 2PM along with Jin Woon and Kwon walking towards our way. We did our handshakes and they joined us.

 

“What did you boys get up to?” I asked while staring down the straight lined formed.

 

“Lunch with 2AM and then played Wii with them” Nichkhun said.

 

“You, Chansung and Taec?” Wooyoung asked. Nichkhun nodded his head and smiled at Wooyoung. Wooyoung looked pissed, maybe because he was left behind again.

 

Taecyeon was at the end of the line, he was leaning on the wall with his eyes closed... asleep again. Chansung was feeding on some ice blocks, Nichkhun was just admiring the stars and Junsu was talking on the phone like always. Kwon and Jin Woon were both staring at me, I just realised.

 

“YAH~JAEBUM, how come you never told me you had a girlfriend?”

 

“I have a girlfriend? Since when?”

 

“Don't play dumb with us, we know your disappearing act” Jin Woon said while sticking his tongue out at me.

 

“I don't have a girlfriend and may you please excuse me, I forgot I have something to do” I lied again. I wasn't up to discuss stuff with these kids; they get all cheesy and emotional when I talk about love.

 

Love is something I can never define and same goes for them.

 

I got up from where I was sitting and walked away from the boys. I heard the mumbling about how I was off to see my girlfriend. Aren't they all excited to see me with a girl, well too bad they will never see me with a girl?

 

Speaking of a girl, I haven't seen Soomi then I remembered I needed to talk to Nichkhun and Taecyeon. I wasn't bothered to go back up the rooftop so I decided to just call Khun and asked him to come down and meet me at the dorm.

 

-

 

“What's up Jay?” Taec asked as he lays his lazy on the couch once again. I handed him and Khun a can of beer each and I sat down the floor along with Nichkhun.

 

How would I start this? Do they both know that they were sending letters to the same girl? Anyone help me?

 

“Jay?” Taecyeon said.

 

I pulled myself back to reality and beat around the bushes.

 

“You boys will tell me if you are courting a girl right?” I started. Yuck, lame!

 

“Yeah I guess” Khun said.

 

“Why would we? You don't tell us about your girlfriend” Taecyeon defended. This guy is going to make my job harder that it already is.

 

“I don't have one, I'm telling you the truth but I am not the case here. You will tell me right?” I continued. Khun nodded his head in unison with Taecyeon's.

 

“Good, so now tell me is there?”

 

“No” they both said at the same time and the same tone.

 

Liars, that's all I can say.

 

“You know I visited Ellie today” I said causing both of them to stiffen. Taecyeon's beer ended up pouring all over him causing him to walk away from me and Nichkhun to change. Khun on the other hand was just staring down the floor upset and melancholy; sort of like those people who just lost someone they truly care about.

 

I felt bad.

 

“Now tell me again there isn't” I continued.

 

“Hyung, miane” he said. I shook my head a little then patted his back softly.

 

“She told you about my letters?”

 

“Yeah but she didn't mean to, she thought I knew. Why didn't you tell me?”

 

“I don't know but why did Taecyeon have to be here?” He asked innocently.

 

“He was sending her letters too but he stopped when she died.”

 

“AHH, well the last letter I sent will be the last I promise. I just admired her too much, I received letters from her so does that mean Taec did too?” he said.

 

“Yeah you both did but it wasn't from her, it was from Ellie. It's complicated to explain but Ellie wrote down the words Soomi wanted to make it simpler but Soomi didn't actually write them.”

 

“Oh really?” he said. I nodded my head he laughed.

 

“You can see the letters if you want?” he offered.

 

I thought about it for a few minutes, I'm sure Soomi would like to hear what “she” wrote to them. I nodded my head and he headed towards the rooms. Taecyeon hasn't come back from his little charade. Khun was back in less than 2 minutes, he handed me a box full of letters then he smiled.

 

“You know I really did like her. That's why when she.... well disappeared, I was pretty devastated. She never read my letters right?”

 

“Not directly” I replied. I needed to get out of the dorm and look for Soomi to show her these.

 

“I'm going out for awhile ok? I'll read these somewhere private. Talk to Taecyeon for me okay? I think he's avoiding the whole subject but I think because you both were sending letters to the same girl she'll talk to you about it.” I told him.

 

“Okay. But Hyung, what were you doing at Ellie's?”

 

“Catching up on old days” I lied.

 

I walked away and got out of the dorm.

 

-

 

I walked over to the practice room where I and Soomi first saw each other. I wanted to go and read the letters to myself first and then giving them to Soomi.

 

I opened the door slowly and was shocked to see Soomi sitting in the middle of the room staring at the blank reflection of her on the mirror. She had her chin on top of her knee with her arms her leg; she focused on the mirror. I slowly made my way towards her making the loudest sound I could possibly make with my shoes but she wasn't budging at all, she was just frozen.

 

I finally reached her, I placed my hand on her shoulders and she looked up at me. Her face was pale, kind of like one of those vampires you see on TV. Her colour faded, her lips were not so red anymore and her eyes were a bit watery. 

 

I quickly drop to the ground next to her and pulled her into my arms. She was colder than she normally is. I was worried about her, is she fading away already?

 

“Gwenchana?” I asked with a soft tone. I waited for her to reply but she didn't.

 

My heart started beating faster and faster, I was so worried about her. She just wouldn't move. I felt her normal temperature coming back then I heard her sigh. I could hear her sobbing but she wasn't crying at all. Is it hard for her kind to cry?

 

“Jay” she finally spoke. The beat of my heart reduced just by hearing her soft voice.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Do you believe in love?” She suddenly asked.

 

I pulled her away from the hug to get a good view of her face; she looked away from me and stared at the mirror again.

 

“I believe that when the time comes that you think love is overrated is the time you're wrong” I replied.

 

“But what good is love when all it brings is pain and suffering?” she continued.

 

“What good is the world without love?” I replied. She looked at me; she took a breath then sighed. She released a faint smile then she placed her head on my shoulder.

 

She's acting really weird? What could possibly be wrong with her?

 

“My sister loves you” she whispered.

 

“Huh?”

 

“She's still in love with you, you visiting her open up the wounds she didn't want to open. I saw her before and she was sad. She was crying, I wanted to hold her but I couldn't. She's very much in love with you” she continued.

 

“Is this why you're upset?”

 

“No. I'm upset because I left the world too early.”

 

“Chris, don't talk like that. You're still on Earth aren't you? Do the things you want to do. Be happy while you search for him” I told her.

 

“You're the only one who can see me”

 

“So? Let's do this together, let's get through it together. I want to be there for you Soomi, don't push away because I'm all you've got right now”

 

= . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = . = .

 

[Soomi]

 

“So? Let's do this together, let's get through it together. I want to be there for you Soomi, don't push me away because I'm all you've got right now” he said while tightening his arms around me.

 

He really shouldn't say those words I want to hear because he gives me more reason to fight for him. I'm going to be selfish about this thing; I want Jay to myself... I really do. I would give anything to walk side by side with him, our hands locked together and everyone could see how happy we both look together.

 

“You shouldn't be so nice to a girl” I told him. He chuckled and I saw him rolling his eyes.

 

“I saw that” I said and his eyes focused on the mirror. We both laughed then I realised he was carrying a box. It was a pink box with hearts all over it, is this guy in love or what?

 

“What's with the box Pink Grandpa” I teased.

 

“Funny... it's a gift for you stalker” he said. I pulled away from him and looked at him confused. He smiled then handed me the box, the idiot forgot that I can hardly touch anything. He placed the box on my lap only causing him to burst out in laughter because it went straight through. I whacked him across the head and my tongue out.

 

“Siff laugh at me, you're mean. By the way how did the talk go?”

 

“These are the letters that “you” wrote to Khun. He told me he really did like you and for Taecyeon, I have no idea. I haven't spoken to him because when I mentioned Ellie's name he spilled his beer all over him and he never came back from changing.” He explained.

 

“You know what I just realised, I met Khun before” I said. I really did to be honest; I just remembered that we met once.

 

“JinJa? When and where?”

 

“I was travelling back then and I went to visit Thailand. I was still young; I think it was one year before you boys debuted. We bumped into each other when he was getting chased by a bunch of crazy girls but that was it, we never met after that.” I explained.

 

“YAH STALKER! How come you never told me this?” he asked annoyed.

 

“Because I just remembered okay, now will you read me these?” I asked. He turned his back on me like a little stubborn kid going against his mother's will.

 

Now do you know why I suddenly fell in love with him?

 

“Sunbae please” I begged. He looked at me straight away with his eyebrows raised. He looked annoyed.

 

“Sunbae? YAH, I rather you call me by my name or don't call me at all, araso?” He said fiercely. He was the one being stubborn and I'm the one being scolded, is this really how it's suppose to be when you're with a stubborn friend?

 

“Araso, now please read me this”

 

“No” he said.

 

“WHY!?”

 

“Before I do let me express my love for you first” he said.

 

“Love?” I asked confused. He stood up from where he was sitting then moved onto the radio stand. He plugged his iPod in the stereo box next to the radio then stood there for awhile. He looked back at me every once in awhile with a smile on his face. He was a little bit strange but I was anticipating this so called “expressing his love for me.”

 

An instrumental then played, it was the song “Love”. He stood there skipping the other parts then he stopped just before the chorus finishes.

 

He quickly walked my way then pulled me off the ground. He locked his hand with my hands then he looked into my eyes.

 

“For better or worst, I'll still will choose you first...” he sang.

 

His voice so manly covered the empty room; I tried processing the words that was just sung to me. He lifted my hand to where his heart was; it was beating fast just like the time when the boys were teasing him at the dorm.

 

“Can you feel it?” he asked. I nodded my head and he smiled.

 

“You make it beat unconditionally fast and I know that you know that because you can see through me. But did you see this one coming...” he paused.

 

“See what coming?” I asked confused.

 

“Did you see me falling in love with you?” he continued.

 

I stood frozen; my hands were probably frozen cold. I looked in his eyes to see if he was lying, to see if this was all a joke but it wasn't. The rhythm of his heart told me he wasn't lying too. I got so scared; I quickly pulled my hand away from him and floated away from him as quickly as I could. I could hear so many questions in his head. I needed to get away from him; he can't fall in love with me. He just can't, we just can't.

 

Love? Why did cupid hit me and Jay with his arrow?