Min Jeong’s POV

The next time I woke up, I felt heavier and more tired than usual. I put my hands on my belly. It had become obviously bigger. Our little one had also become more active than usual.

“Why are you so excited?” I asked, patting where the head is gently.

I heard a commotion outside, and the next I know, the door opened.

“Jeongie unnie!!” Aeri screamed as she struggled to get off Seungho.

“What is it!?” Seungho looked surprised at his girl’s sudden actions.

“Sweetie, can you see me!?” I asked, a little too excitedly, probably shocking our little one with my sudden movement, thus causing it to kick me in protest.

“Ahh~” I groaned.

I saw Seungho squeezed his eyes shut as he in a deep breath and rubbed his belly.

“Appa bullied me!! He bit me!!” Aeri complained as she pointed at Seungho accusingly.

“What!?” Seungho exclaimed.

I laughed, but they obviously could not hear.

“What’s wrong?” I heard Seungho ask.

I stopped laughing and looked at the pair.

Aeri was pouting, her head hanging low.

“I thought she would wake up and defend me, but she didn’t.” She said.

“My sweet, sweet girl~” Seungho said, hugging her tightly.

“You miss her too, don’t you?” He asked.

“And I miss the both of you too.” I said.

Seungho was looking right into my eyes, but he was oblivion to it. He squeezed my hand with his free hand. All I could do was look.

Pandy barked, gaining attention.

“Come here.” Seungho said, offering his lap to him.

“Thank you, Seungho, and I am sorry.” I said.

That night, we slept in the same bed. Aeri hugged my belly protectively while Pandy slept like a starfish across Seungho’s legs. Seungho was, of course, next to me.

He smoothed my hair absentmindedly, like he always would.

“Jeong ah~” He called out.

“Hmm?” I answered.

“Wake up so you could see this.” He said.

“See what?” I asked.

“It’s our family. Isn’t it beautiful?” He asked.

“Absolutely.” I said.

He then buried his face into my shoulder, sobbing silently like he always would.

I shifted myself so I could be facing him. I wish so hard to hold him close to me, but I just could not.

I glide my finger gently across his. For a split moment, he looked surprised. Did he feel it?

“Wake up, my darling. Please wake up. Seunghoie is tired. Seunghoie needs you very desperately. Our family needs you.” He said as he cried.

“I am awake, Seungho ah. I am.” I said, hugging him, despite all I caught was air.

***
This time, despite falling asleep, I still wake up as per normal people do, never falling back into that black hole of darkness.

Seungho came everyday, as usual. He looked more like the expecting one than I do, but that is of course. But despite his fatigue, he never failed to give me massages and talk to me. He also did work for Junhyung whenever he could, but would slowly doze off, only to wake up in shock again. I know I should not be laughing at him, but it was really cute and funny to watch.

I was aware that my due date was near as I could feel it, and of course, it was not too hard to count backwards. I was more afraid for Seungho than for myself, though. I could not help but wonder what if he had to go through it too.

If I were physically with him, I would definitely not mind having him go through it. But now that I am not, I do not wish to think about how is he going to cope. I am very confident about the people around him giving him all the aid they can, but I know my Seungho. He will receive none of it. He will endure it himself until he breaks, but still endure it. Stubborn or determined, it is really a matter of how you look at it.

The door opening distracted us, revealing Doojoon who look paler than the walls of this room.

“Are you alright?’ Seungho asked.

Doojoon’s attempted reply turned into a coughing fit. He gestured Seungho to go outside has he coughed his lungs out.

“Yah!! Don’t leave me here!!” I yelled.

Seungho did not close the door properly, thus leaving a gap for me to hear what were they saying.

“Drink slowly.” Seungho said as he rubbed Doojoon’s back while Doojoon drank.

 “You are sick.” Seungho said, touching Doojoon’s forehead.         

Doojoon, like Seungho, has absolutely no idea how to take care of himself. They can score five stars in taking care of others, but definitely a big, fat zero when it comes to taking care of themselves.

“Just slightly.” Doojoon said.

Doojoon, why am I not surprised that this is coming from you?

“I have something to discuss with you.” He said.

Seungho nodded, gesturing him to go on.

“As you know, Min Jeong’s due date is near.” Doojoon said.

Seungho said something, but I could not really hear, it was something regarding cesarean.

Pandy was scratching the door. I was distracted into disturbing him. He seemed to be able to feel my presence. I should not be bullying him but he looks so cute when confused. Just like Seungho.

“WHAT!? HOW!? ISN’T THAT MORE DANGEROUS!? ARE YOU CRAZY!?” Seungho yelled, shocking the hell out of me. I was pretty sure the entire block could hear it.

“Listen!” Doojoon said.

“Although she may be in a coma, but she is strong enough to give birth naturally. I know it sounds absurd. It may be uncommon but it has been done before!” Doojoon said, trying very hard to keep his cool.

Did he just mention giving birth naturally? Well, I have read news reports on it before, but I never thought it was doable. Is he really suggesting it? Honestly, I was good to give it a try. I already lost half the time of my pregnancy to coma. If I could give birth to our child naturally, I will do it, despite the pain and all. My only concern is, Seungho.

I watch as Seungho yelled like a mad man, and Doojoon took it professionally. He stood there, letting Seungho scream at him despite not deserving any of this.

He looked like he was about to say something when he started coughing again.

“ARE YOU CRAZY!? HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST A RIDICULOUS METHOD LIKE THIS!? YOU CALL YOURSELF A DOCTOR!? YOU CALL YOURSELF MIN JEONG’S FRIEND!?” Junhyung yelled, appearing out of nowhere.

“Listen, darling.” Doojoon said gently. I had no idea if it was because he was too sick, or was it because it was Junhyung he was facing.

I gasped, and I was sure Seungho did too, when Junhyung slapped Doojoon across his cheek, staining his pale cheek red almost instantly.

“Let’s talk later.” Doojoon said so softly we almost did not catch it.

“Doo!” I yelled.

I wanted to go with him, but I could not leave Seungho.

“Why didn’t you hear out his explanation?” Seungho questioned Junhyung like a father to his son.

“I don’t know. What did I do?” Junhyung looked genuinely scared.

“Go apologize.” Seungho said.

He left Junhyung to have some alone time as he headed back into the room. He patted Pandy’s head and then slumped his usual seat next to me.

“What should I do?” He muttered, burying his face into his palms.

He was so strong outside, but now he just looked defeated.

I sat next to him, caressing his hand. He had his eyes shut, with one hand holding his forehead.

“It’s okay, darling. It’s okay.” I said, in hope he would be able to hear me.
***

The subsequent days, I saw Seungho less and less. Whenever he comes, he will just sit quietly next to me, either alone, or while Aeri and Pandy play around. He looked obviously stressed out.

"Appa~" Aeri called out as she tried to climb onto his lap.

"Yes, love?" He asked as he helped her up.

She wrapped her legs around his waist, hugging him tightly.

"What is it?" He asked, smiling slightly.

"Nothing. I just want to hug you." She said.

"Aww~ Alright, let's hug." He said.

"Forever!" She exclaimed as she tightened her arms around his neck, causing him to let out a yelp.

Aeri giggled, and so did Seungho. This girl sure has her ways around her Appa.

Thank you, sweetie, for making him smile in your own little ways.

I watch as they held onto each other until Aeri finally fell asleep. Seungho moved as gently as possible with the girl in his arms.

"I love you." I said to me as he planted a gentle kiss on my forehead.

"And you too." He said, kissing my belly.

He stood there for a while with his eyes closed, before gesturing for Pandy to follow him as they exit the room.

***
After that night Junhyung slapped Doojoon, Junhyung came separately to my room and spoke to me.

"I did something really stupid today, Jeong ah. I don't know why but I slapped Doojoon for something that was absolutely not his fault. He was just doing his job. I hold a job that at times put me in a difficult position too. Why didn't I understand him? Of all people, I should be understanding him the most, right? What have I done? And to add to that, he is so sick and I had no idea. I failed so badly, as a boyfriend, and a fellow human being. Sometimes I feel I that I don't even deserve this fine man." He said, holding onto my hand tightly.

He was indeed remorseful. It was obvious to his bones. To be honest, all of this started because of me. The one to be blame should be me, but why is everyone else suffering on my behalf?

While Junhyung zoned out next to me until he fell asleep, I caught a glimpse of Doojoon outside. He watched Junhyung from outside for a long time until he was distracted by a phone call. Even when he had to go, he still could not take his eyes off his boyfriend.

Junhyung ah, you may think you don't deserve a fine man like Doojoon, but you and him are a pair made for each other. It may not seem like it, but trust me, even if you guys separate, you will still find your back to each other.

***
“Did your sweetheart come today? I haven’t seen him in a while. Do you think he’s still angry with me?” Doojoon asked as he checked on my vital signs.

“I wonder where he is too.” I said as I watch him busy himself for a while, before slumping onto the couch.

“Are you here to slack off, Dr Yoon?” I asked.

“Jeong ah~ You have to be strong, okay? You have to deliver your baby smoothly.” He said.

“I know. I know. I really do.” I sighed.

“Honestly, I can’t believe you are a mother now.” He chuckled.

“Neither can I.” I said, caressing my belly.

“This is just so amazing. To become a parent. I wonder how it feels like.” He said softly.

I knew Doojoon always loved children. Junhyung too know that. It was not hard to tell from the look on Doojoon’s face whenever he sees kids running around, or babies smiling back at him when he smile at them.

“I am going to be the god-daddy of your child, alright? You have no say in this. I am just informing you.” He said.

“Of course, of course.” I laughed.

***
A few more days passed without seeing Seungho. I felt like a puppy waiting for my owner to come home. I found myself practically sitting next to the door, waiting to see if he comes, but he did not.

I spent my days napping since I had nothing else to do. I was afraid that my short nap would turn into another deep sleep, so I forced myself awake every half an hour.

Today, I napped as usual, but I was awoken by a sharp pain even before I reached the half an hour mark. I jot up, and help onto my belly, afraid that something was happening to my unborn child.

The pain went off as quickly as it came. I lied back down, in hope to fall asleep again, but I was too scared this time. I lay in bed, eyes opened wide. It did not take long for another wave of pain to hit me.

What happens when you fall into a coma for all nine months of your pregnancy is that no one has educated you on being pregnant at all. It took me a few waves of pain to realize that this I am feeling is what you called, my friends, a contraction.

I was in labour.

A week earlier than the scheduled due date.

I let myself freak out for a few minutes, and then I collected myself. I tried to remember all the things Doojoon and the gynae tell Seungho as if he was the pregnant one. Or rather, he is, somehow. How to breathe, how to ease the pain. I watch him do it next to me all the time.

It did not take long for me to end up crying in bed, hoping Seungho would somehow appear and hold onto my hand. But come to think of it, if I am in labour, he is probably feeling it too, and most likely having a harder time than I am trying to deal with the pain.

Strangely enough, today no one came to check in on me. I usually hated it because everyone who came in was not my Seungho. But today, I was almost dying for someone to come and notice the change.

Did everyone start to forget me already?

And then I made up my mind, even if I end up giving birth on my own, I am going to do it. For our baby, for Seungho, I am going to do it.

***
I monitored my own contractions and found ways to make myself feel more comfortable in this extremely uncomfortable situation I was in.

This is no doubt one difficult baby. Minutes felt like hours, hours felt like days, and there was still no sign of our baby wanting to come into this world. All our baby was doing is putting his or her parents in great pain. How cheeky~

I had no idea how long had passed. The door flew open suddenly, and I thought it was Seungho.

“Doojoon, you might as well come next year.” I said.

“Oh my god, oh my god. I am so sorry, so sorry, so sorry.” He panicked after realizing I was in labour.

“What do I do? What do I do?” He muttered to himself.

I watch as he nervously paced around the room. It was funny to watch honestly.

“Dr Yoon, STOP!” I yelled, and like a spell, he stopped pacing around.

“Alright. Alright. Let’s do this.” He encouraged himself.

He transformed from a nervous wreck to the professional doctor he is. He scribbled notes on his notepad, and gave clear instructions to the nurses. Now, that is Dr Yoon.

After twenty minutes or so, the door opened again, and this time, finally, it is the man I have wanted to see since days ago.

“Seungho!” I cried.

“Oh my god. Are you alright?” Doojoon asked him.

He nodded and came to my side, grabbing onto my hand tightly. His hands were cold and shaky.

“Where is Junhyung?” Doojoon asked, looking at the door nervously.

“I… I just couldn’t wait.” Seungho said.

“Alright. Never mind. I’ll just…” Doojoon muttered something under his breath.

“Anway, she is in labour. Your baby decided that he or she wants to come early. Impatient baby.” Doojoon smiled.

“How is she now? Is she okay? Are you sure she wouldn’t be in any danger?” Seungho asked.

“Come and take a look for yourself.” The gynae gestured Seungho.

He looked a little awkward, but still did as he was told. This is Seungho, shy as ever.

“What are you doing pretending to be shy!? You’re a beast in bed! That’s why I got pregnant!” I laughed.

Seungho came back next to me and held onto my hand.

“Just kidding. You’re a lamb. I am the beast.” I said.

“Are you in pain? Hmm? I hope not. Min Jeong ah, it’s been nine months. Even our baby is coming to see us. How about you? When are you going to wake up and take a look at us? We all miss you. I miss you. I need you.” He said.

“And oh, Aeri wants me to hand her power teddy to you.” He said, letting the teddy sit on top of my baby bump.

Aeri, this sweetheart, how can anyone not love her?

 The nurses let Aeri and Pandy in. Aeri kissed me on my cheek and whispered her usual ‘I love you. Appa is bullying me. Wake up and scold him.’ to me.

We all know Seungho did not bully her, it is probably the other way round. But I knew why she said that. Aeri ah, I want to wake up too. I really do.

We were left alone for the next few hours. Seungho kept talking to me, telling me how he wants to decorate the baby room, how apologetic he feels for not doing up the room in the nine months he had, and now the baby would not have a proper room. He also told me how he felt so sorry for yelling at Aeri this afternoon.

Why are you so sorry about everything, Seungho ah? You are probably the one who should be receiving the apology.

As time passed, he got quieter. Towards the end, he was just resting his forehead against my shoulder, holding onto my hand tightly, caressing my belly and breathing really deeply. He would occasionally tell me that I was doing well. He was in a lot of pain, probably more than I am, but he was keeping it in. Seungho ah, you are the one doing really well, not me.

“How’s everything?” Doojoon asked when he came in.

“ing hurts.” Seungho muttered.

Just as Doojoon was about to take a look at my dilation, Seungho jumped and stopped him.

“You’re not allowed to.” He said.

“I am a doctor.” Doojoon said.

“And her friend too. No!” Seungho insisted.

“I am professional.” Doojoon said.

“NO!!!!” Seungho yelled.

He was so protective to the point it was cute. Doojoon looked genuinely shocked.

“Okay. Alright. I wouldn’t. Calm down. Sit down. I’ll get the gynae.” He said before heading out.

Seungho buried his face into my shoulder and groaned in pain.

“I am sorry, darling, for having you go through this.” I said, feeling very guilty that he was in pain.

Seungho is not made for this, to add to that, he is new to feeling pain, he must be really hard for him to not scream. I want to hug him and let him know I am here for him, but why can’t I?

“It’s going to be any time now. You tell me.” The gynae said to Seungho.

Doojoon cleared the room, leaving only me, Seungho and the gynae.

“Describe the pain to me.” The gynae asked Seungho.

Seungho looked like he just wants to roll around the room until it is all over and not say a single word. This lady here obviously could not tell, but I could.

“Don’t make him talk, you ridiculous woman. You know how the pain is like!” I yelled, but she obviously could not hear.

“Feels like.. someone pushing a knife into me. Even though the knife is already inside me. My back, my entire lower body, no, screw that, my entire body, is hurting like crazy. There’s no description for this type of pain. It’s just… the definition of pain. Maybe, it redefined pain. And , don’t make me talk.” Seungho groaned.

I laughed. Seungho is not one who curses on a regular basis. But today, in this short span of a few hours, I have no lost count of the number of times he said ‘’.

Surprisingly, what I am feeling is a constant ache, but not as tremendous as I thought it would be. I think it is because it has all, for some strange reason, went to Seungho. Aww, my poor boy.

The gynae went on yapping while Seungho just held onto my hand tightly with one hand, and gripped the side of the bed tightly with another hand. He bit his lips so hard his thick, red lips stood out even more than it already did against his pale face. He was perspiring and his eyes glistered with tears.

“You can scream, you know.” The gynae said.

Seungho glared at her. His glare must have scared the hell out of the gynae, but it was a good thing as it sure did shut .

It was all good until we heard a familiar cry.

“APPA!” Aeri cried.

“I am sorry.” Doojoon said, carrying a crying Aeri in his arms.

Seungho’s expression soften immediately.

Come here.” He said, arms open wide, inviting his girl.

“What’s wrong? Why is my princess crying?” He asked as he wiped her tears.

It was as if all the pain he was feeling before was gone. He was just focused on her.

“I want Appa.” She said, circling her arms around him tightly.

“Alright.” Seungho kissed her hair and let her sit on his lap.

After an hour or so, I felt the ache intensify, and I was very sure Seungho did too, because he let out a groan.

The gynae checked on me and then looked at Seungho.

The baby is ready. Finally.

Seungho had a hard time trying to put Aeri now. In the end, he managed to coax her to sit by my side.

“Jeongie unnie, Aeri loves you.” She whispered to me as she danced her teddy bear on my belly.

“Encourage her.” The gynae told Seungho.

What was she thinking? The one needed the most encouragement is Seungho.

Nevertheless, Seungho did as he was told, or rather, he never need to be told. Him being here with me was an encouragement already.

I was pretty sure the pain I was in now was not how the actual childbirth felt like. This is probably just half or a quarter of it.

Seungho ah, let’s just stop at this baby, okay?

“Do you want to come and see?” The gynae asked Seungho who looked like he was going to fall onto the ground if he let go of the railings.

But his determination was stronger than anything else. He made his way over.

“Oh my god.” His voice shook. He was holding in his tears.

“She’s doing very well.” The gynae said.

“Ahhh damnn~” He grunted, clutching onto his stomach.

Seungho ended up squatting down as he watch the birth of our son.

“Do you want to catch your baby?” The gynae asked.

Seungho nodded. She helped him up and guided his hands into position.

The final wave of pain was so intense even for me that I was yelling my lungs out. Seungho, on the other hand, kept his cool, despite having his face red from the pain.

I felt our baby slide out of me and into Seungho’s arms, crying loudly with all his might.

“Congratulations, you got yourself a son.” The gynae said.

“Oh my god~” Seungho let out the tears he was holding back in. I had no idea if he was crying from the pain or was it tears of joy, or both.

“Come, Seungho, we need to clean and check him. You ought to rest too.” The gynae said, wanting to take our son from him.

“No. Don’t take him away.” Seungho said, not allowing her too.

“Seungho ah? What’s wrong? Our baby is safe. Don’t worry.” I said.

Doojoon, Junhyung and Pandy came in.

“No, no, no.” Seungho backed away with our son in his arms.

They were obviously surprised by his actions.

“Seungho hyung, your baby needs to get checked and cleaned up. Please. He must be really cold now.” Doojoon said.

Doojoon sure knows how to work his cards well. He stabbed right into Seungho’s heart by saying our son must be feeling really cold now. But Doojoon, thank you.

Seungho let them take our son before turning to me.

“Min Jeong ah, you did well. Thank you, Min Jeong ah~” He said.

“No, Seungho, thank you.” I said.

“Why don’t you wake up, Min Jeong ah? Why don’t you wake up and look at our son? He is so cute, so strong, just like you. Wake up and look at him. Please. Wake up already.” He cried, shaking me.

“Hyung~” Junhyung wanted to pull me away but was stopped by Doojoon.

The both of them left the room quietly, bringing Aeri and Pandy with them.

“Min Jeong, why aren’t you waking up? You don’t wish to see our son? Is it because of me? Is it because you don’t like me? That’s why don’t want to see our baby? Is it me? I am sorry, Min Jeong ah~ I’m very sorry. Please, stop doing this to me. Please wake up.” He knelt down next to me, crying.

“What are you talking about, Yang Seungho!? What are you saying about me not wanting to see you? About not wanting to see about baby!? How can you say such things, Yang Seungho! How could you!? Do you know how horrible I feel? Seeing you in so much pain and sadness and yet all I could do is lie here as if I was dead? How could you say such things!?” I yelled at him.

But seeing him cry so badly, I could not even get angry at all.

“I am sorry, Yang Seungho. I really am. You shouldn’t be going through all these alone. But I am here, Seungho ah. Can you at least feel me here in your heart? I have never abandoned you. I have never left.” I said.

He curled up into a ball, crying for a really long time. I sat next to him watching him cry. He fell asleep eventually.

“I love you.” I said, placing my hand on his shoulder.

I gasped when I felt something more than just air. I felt him. His flesh, his warmth. I could feel him. I could feel my Seungho.

What does this mean?

I felt the familiar tingling feeling again.

“No, no, no, no, no.” I pleaded.

I knew what was happening but as hard as I tried to hold it back, I was not strong enough for it. Eventually, my body gave in. I collapsed onto Seungho. I closed my eyes and was unwillingly back into darkness.

Everything was familiar. It was happening again. Except, this time, I did not feel cold. I felt warm, and it was not just any other warmth. It was Seungho’s warmth.