Yoseob P.O.V

"I don't think Doojoon is alright." i sighed hanging my head. "Why do you think so?" Kiki asked and sat opposite me. "He acted strangely couple days ago." 

"How so? You know i really can't help you if you don't tell me more?" Kikwang chuckled little while i was suffering with my thoughts. 

I can't tell Kiki about our agreement. It seemed like Joonie didn't want to keep on with it. Or more like he thought I didn't want to. 

"I.. Well it seemed like he thought he's going  to lose me." i told and Kiki tilted his head. "Why would he think that? Have you said something to him? Aren't you guys best friends?" 

I nodded. "Of course of course.. But this is more complicated. I didn't say anything though." 

Kiki looked at me with no expressions and i knew he didn't understand me at all. Should i tell him what is really going on..? I mean we've been best friends since kindergarden... But at the other hand "Friends with benefits" rule number four was that we can't tell anyone...

No i can't keep this anymore. "Okay.. Get ready for something.. well shocking." I smiled nervously. Kiki made sure he was sitting properly. 

"So.. You know how me and Doojoon really are best friends, right?" Kiki nodded. "Well there is bit more too.." i kinda whispered but Kiki heard it properly. His eyes widened. 

"We ain't dating or anything!" i quickly added. "Then what the heck are you talking about?!" he shouted almost climbing over the table to choke me. 

"Listen until i'm finished! Then you can kill me.." Kiki sat down but i still could see him being furious.

"We are friends with benefits. It just happened... It started when we were celebrating Junnie hyung's and Seungie's making up when we came home. I was drunk - sorry about that by the way - and then after a while he just kissed me. And it felt so good. We both liked it.. It happened again in the restaurant when we were in the bathroom.. He suggested this thing after some time." i explained looking at the table.

First Kiki didn't say anything. He seemed to be taking this all in before commenting. "O..kay.. So you guys are.. a thing now?" 

"No. I just told you that we are not dating. There is only few rules to this thing." i said and Kiki asked what were those rules. "Do they make any sense?" 

"1. No love. 2. Dating others allowed - if i start to date someone or if he does, we can cut it off. 3. Only making out means no included. 4. No telling anyone else. Do they make sense?" i asked.

"They do kind of. First of all, you told me? Second.. Don't you think you guys will fall in love with each other?" Kiki doubted.

"I told you because i just couldn't keep it in anymore.. You're my best friend. Forever. And we won't. We are friends with needs."

"I'm happy you did tell. Honestly. But im just worried.. If other one falls in love and then other one finds someone.. Then someone gets hurt." Kiki had a point. Well almost.

"Kiwii.. We won't fall in love." i said looking at him convincing. "I hope so Seobie." he smiled. "I know so." i got up and hugged him.

"I'm so glad i told you." i sighed happily. "Me too. I want to tell you something too." Kiki said suddenly excited. "It's almost December right? It's gonna be Christmas. We could spent it all together!" he explained. 

"It sounds good to me. I can't go home, since they'll go to Hawaii and i don't want to. But i think Seungie and Junhyung want to go see their parents." i doubted. 

"It may be. But there will be you, me and Woonie at least. I don't know about the other three. You could ask Doojoon. And by the way. About him acting weirdly... Just ask him." Kiki engouraged me. 

"I did. But he said he don't know what he was thinking. Should i just let this pass? And hope it's nothing?" i asked. "It depends. Does he have a reason to think he's losing you?" 

"No! I'm not going anywhere." i sighed. "Then let it pass. And show him he's not gonna lose you." Kiki smiled. He was probably right. 

"Okay. Should we go to mall now. Shopping or something?" i chuckled. Kiki clapped his hands happily. "Lets go!" 

Hyunseung P.O.V

I'm actually really worried about Seobie. He's my baby and even though it's been long time from Seungri's death, i don't think Seobie should start dating anyone right now. 

I know year is a long time, i know. Last February was awful time to all of us and i just can't believe Seobie is over it already. 

I don't know if i'm mean when i say that i don't want him to move on yet. It's too soon. But it's only because im so worried.

Sometimes i'm not even sure if we are best friends with Yoseobie.. I think he still tells more about his things to Kikwang. Though it's kinda normal since they've been best friends since forever. I know they care about me as much i care about them.

It's just a habit that i'm kinda left out. I'm spending too much time with Junhyung. Well anyways. Right now i can't think about Yoseob.

I know it can wait, but this problem beside me, can't.

"So... You are suggesting what?" i asked glancing him. "I'm so sorry Seung.. I like Hara so much. But i like you too. Sooo much. And i can't choose between you guys. I really can't. And when i suggested to you couple days ago, the date i was already asking too much. Now i'm gonna be even worse." he took a deep breath.

I'm not so sure if i want to hear this. It's not because it would be something really lame or anything.. But because i'm afraid that i'll say yes whatever it is.

"I want to spent time with you... Without Hara knowing about it. I know it's so wrong.. I know i just should leave her and take you or leave you and take her but i can't. I want both of you.."

I was silent. I couldn't believe he was suggesting something like THAT. "Are you out of your mind?! I don't want to be the one you cheat on with! I'd be as quilty as robber! No way.. I thought you knew me even that much.." 

Junhyung looked at the floor. I didn't even feel bad for him, because he was treating Hara so wrong. Even though i don't like her, she still deserves the best. Like everybody. Including me. 

"I know you.. And i really knew what you were gonna say. I just needed to hear it from you. I'm sorry Seungie." he sighed and stood up. "I'm gonna go. Bye Jyung." 

I watched him walking towards the door and in my head it seemed to be the slowest walk ever. This would be the last time i could look at him with loving eyes or even think that he'd be mine. Last time, because i just made it pretty clear i don't want to be with him.

"Wait Junnie!" i jumped off the couch. I didn't even know what was i doing, walking to him and taking his hand.

"This.. Ends here?" i asked with sadness in my eyes. He nodded. "I guess so." It all seemed too bad to be even reality. I've probably forgot to mention how i'm afraid of ending things..

Life ending, school ending, relationships ending.. Everything. "Junhyung... Listen." i shighed and gathered all my courage and stupidness together. 

"I can't afford to lose you. I just can't. Since the day i realised i like you, i've wanted to be yours. And i've wanted you to be mine. I know both of them can't happen.. You have Hara. But i wan't to be yours at least.." 

Jun turned to me and cupped my face. "Are you saying.. That you want to do this? Even though we are doing so bad thing to everyone?" he asked in disbelief. 

"Like i said.. I can't afford to lose you." i removed his hands and circled my own around his neck. "This stays between you and me.. Only you and me." i felt like crying and laughing at the same time.

Junnie likes me ! But i have to break a relationship to get him. And i don't even get him to myself, i'm just borrowing him. I can't ever be sure he won't just leave me. This is gonna be tough. But i have to try. Sorry Goo Hara...

"Only you and me." he confirmed and kissed me sweetly. And the roller coaster ride has began.

Dongwoon P.O.V 

"Hey Kiki." i said kissing my boyfriend sweetly. "Hey." he smiled. 

I sat beside him and he just sighed. "What? Don't you love me anymore?" i asked jokingly. "Haha. Funny. Yoseob visited today.." he looked at me.

I had told Kiki about Seob's new boyfriend and he had got mad of course. Almost called Yoseob wanting an explanation. 

"What did he say? Something about the mysterious guy?" Kiki shook his head. "No. Nothing. I was hoping he'd say something about this guy but he didn't say anything about it. I'm getting worried." he said actually looking like he was dying.

"Do you have fever or something? Or are you hiding something? You look like that." i asked turning to sideways. 

"No i'm fine. I'm just really stressed out about this. You know. He really can't move on so fast. It's only been a year. Not even that. And he's already moving on." 

This point maybe get me to wake up. "Kiki, honey. We don't even know if he is dating this guy." i reminded. "We only know what Junhyung told us." i smiled. 

"You are right. But what he told us really seems like they are dating. Don't you think? I mean why would he hide this guy from us if they weren't?" Kiki had his point, but still i think we should ask it from Yoseob. 

"Shouldn't you ask it from him then?" i suggested. He shook his head. "I can't. Seobie is the kind of guy who will tell us when he's ready. I don't want to be the one who seems like is hiding things." 

"Isn't he hiding things right now?" i raised my eyebrow. "Of course. But in this situation i think it's his right to do that." Kiki said smiling weakly. 

"I don't get it. But if you say so, then Yoseobie need to tell us when he's ready. And we'll wait?" i lift my pinky up. Kiki looked at it and then hold his pinky on mine. "We'll wait." 

I kissed my boyfriend tenderly cupping his face. "We should do something this Christmas. Together. With everyone." he said then.

"I think that's a good idea. You think others will like it?" i smiled. "Sure. I mean if they won't go to their parents. Seobie said he will be with us." Kiki hugged me. 

"We can talk about this later. Let's go to sleep." I lifted Kiki up and carried him towards our bedroom. 

Hey guyss and sorry about short update again... 

I'm really busy nowadays. But it'll change. So Finnish Independence Day is coming

next week and i'll have four days off in a row ! Then i'll try to update.

Hope you like this chap.. I know it's kinda boring but.. yeah. Comment please!