TAEYEON’S POV

……..

TAEYEON’S OLD HIGH SCHOOL THEATER.

“GIRL YOU REALLY GOT ME BAD! YOU REALLY GOT ME BAAAAD!” Yuri sang loudly.

“now I’m gonna get you back..I’m gonna get you back.” I sang too.

“Damn Taeng this song is daebak!” I can see some drool at the corner of Yuri’s lips while she speak.

I put the mic back on the stand and gulp more beer.

“WHY DO YOU DO WHAT YOU DO TO ME!.” I sang loudly.

“yeah!.” Yuri shouted back.

“WHY WON’T YOU ANSWER ME, ANSWER ME?” I stood up and pointed at myself.

“yeah!” Yuri nodded her head with a pout while pointing at me.

“THERE AIN’T NOBODY WHO CAN COMFORT ME!!!.” I pouted.

“yaaaaaaaaaaah! What do you think am I doing? I’m comforting you bidj!.” She scoffed at me.

I let out an ahjumma laugh.

“ok,scratch that lyrics.” I said in a slightly slurred tone.

Yuri laughed.

She stood up groggily with a can of beer on her hand. I watch as she stood at the centre of the stage.

“Taeyeon-ah..Imagine someone is watching us now…what song would you like to sing for that particular person?” she asked.

I scratched my chin with a frown.

“if…” I started.

Yuri clapped excitedly.

“Omo, I love your song.” She said in a fan girling kind of way.

I smirked and faced the stage.

“if…you want my body! If you think I’m y! C’mon sugar let me know…” I sang with a wide grin on my face.

Yuri threw an empty can of beer at me.

“If you really need me, just reach out and touch me, c’mon honey tell me so.” Yuri y danced in front of me.

‘awwww, my innocent eyes XD.’

“oh! If you want maaaaaah bodaaaaaaaaay!” we shouted in unison.

We laughed and sat at the edge of the stage with our legs dangling on the air.

“you’re crazy.” I said with a smile.

“and so are you.” She grinned.

We went into silence and I started to sing again.

“ I can't fight this feeling any longer. 

And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow. 
What started out as friendship, 
Has grown stronger. 
I only wish I had the strength to let it show. 

I tell myself that I can't hold out forever. 
I said there is no reason for my fear. 
Cause I feel so secure when we're together. 
You give my life direction, 
You make everything so clear. 

And even as I wander, 
I'm keeping you in sight. 
You're a candle in the window, 
On a cold, dark winter's night. 
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might. 

And I can't fight this feeling anymore. 
I've forgotten what I started fighting for. 
It's time to bring this ship into the shore, 
And throw away the oars, forever. 

Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore. 
I've forgotten what I started fighting for. 
And if I have to crawl upon the floor, 
Come crushing through your door, 

Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore. .”

I look at Yuri and chuckled.

“mesmerized much?” I said.

Yuri smirked.

“If I was not inlove with Sica. I guess liking you won’t be that bad either.”

I punched her arm.

“I told you you’re talkative when your drunk…filters Kwon Yuri.”

She smirked.

“anyways, was that the song you would sing for the special person on the audience.” She said while looking at the audience seats.

I chuckled.

“I don’t know.” I hugged my knees. “ I…really don’t know.” I trailed.

“ I am in misery….” Yuri sing songed.

“and so am I.” I said.

‘damn that was not supposed to be said. T.T’

She looked at me curiously.

“Is this about Tiffany?” she asked.

I quickly shook my head.

“what makes you th…”

“ it! Stop lying Taeng.” She lay on the floor with her arms behind her head.

“Yuri, I’m not gay.” I said meekly.

‘what the hell is wrong with me.’

“psssshhh! You’re just scared and confused.” She said.”you’re on the denial stage so maybe a bit more time and you’ll realize that I was right all along.” She said confidently.

“Yuri I’m not denial, confused or scared. I’m not gay. If fans see me as one I don’t care”

‘iam not gay..not…gay…not….’

“geez, why so serious?” she sat up and pulled me with her. “now raise your glass.”

I stared at the can on my hand

‘…she said glass..should I still raise this?’

I shrugged and raised my CAN.

“bottoms up.” I said as I gulped mine.

She did the same and we went to down the rest of the beer we bought.

After drinking a dozen of beer and 2 bottles of soju.

‘damn we are drunk…especially Yul.’

Yuri and I decided to walk back since drunk driving won’t be safe maybe drunk walking would be safer.

My old school was just a couple of walks towards our place and no sweat cause the weather was cold.

Yuri opened the door while singing.

“can you blow my whistle baby..whistle baby….”she opened the door for me while hip ing before me.”Here we go!.” She laughed.

I faced her and smirked.

“I’m glad you came.” I winked at her.

“ah! You’re starting a battle here aren’t you/” she laughed as she removed her shoes.

“what do you mean?” I asked as I head to the kitchen for some coffee.

“ a battle for songs with innuendo.”

I paused and chuckled.

“You started it with ‘whistle’.”

She drank some water and waved her finger.

“oh no! miss- I-did-not-start-this-innuendo-battle. You sang ‘don’t you think I’m y’ when I thought you’ll sing ‘if’.”

I shrugged with a smile.

I raised my hand as a sign of surrender.

“Guess you proved your point.”

We jumped when the lights went on to reveal a sleepy Jessica and Tiffany.

‘You two are noisy.” Jessica hissed as she gets the glass of water on Yuri’s hand and drunk it.

“Where did you two go/” Tiffany asked.

“outside, we just went on for a walk.” I was not lying! We did walk and that’s the truth.

“Hey! What’s that smell?” Tiffany asked.

“Shhiiiiiit!.” My eyes widen when I saw Yuri vomiting on the sink. “You er! Your puke smells like shiiit!.” I said as I gave her some tissue.

“not my fault thou.” Yuri grabbed the coffee on my hand and took a sip.” Ah! That tastes good.” She closed her eyes and smiled.

I pulled Yuri to sit and oh! I forgot about Jessica and Fany.

They were still looking at us or more like judging us.whatever.

“Are you two drunk?” They asked in unison.

“How I wish were not..awww my head hurts.” Yuri whinned.

“Yuri!.” I covered her filter less mouth.” We drunk a bit..just a bit.”

They both rolled their eyes.

“mphmmmmmmhhhphhhphmmm.” Yuri said.

She removed my hand off .

“I am drunk..Taeyeon is just so so.” I mentally  face palmed myself. “Taeng your hands tastes salty.” She commented while her lips.

“Damn you.” I hissed and stepped on Yuri’s foot.

“awwww.” She pouted.”yeobo! look she’s hurting me.” Yuri said in an aegyo like tone.

“did she just called me yeobo?” Tiffany asked while pointing at herself.

“anniyo!.” Sica and I said in unison.

“chill people..geez I was just asking.” Tiffany raised her hands in surrender like position.

“Yah fany=ah!” Yuri called.”you’re not my yeobo..keep on dreaming for my y bodaaaaaay~” Yuri winked followed by a wicked smirk.

‘damn this gay.’

“Yul shut up.” I hissed when I saw Tiffany frowning.

‘awww my baby is frowning….! What the hell! Did I just call her….’

“baby.” The three stared at me with a what-the-hell-look and I was just there standing with my hands covering my stupid mouth.

“what the hell.” Jessica rolled her eyes.”This is nonsense. There’s no point of talking to two drunk people.” She sighed.

Tiffany nodded still the frown was present on her pretty face.

‘damn I should stop praising her.’

“Are you mad Fany-ah?” Yuri asked.

I look at Yuri with a –what-now-look.

“You know you can always call Taeyeon as your seobang,then you can be her yeobo. You see Taeyeon here is ga…..”

I quickly sat on Yuri’s lap and shushed her with both of my hands.

“shut up.” I glared at her.

She removed my hands and smiled at me.

“geez..Taeng.” She frowned while staring at my face.

‘damn I know this look.’

“have I told you before that you’re prettier…..” she inched her face towards me.”up close.” She smiled.

‘must not puke. DAMN YOU KWON YURI!!!.’

I was about to hit her hard but then she lost consciousness.

‘thank God.’

I look back at Jessica and Tiffany who seems to be uh…how do I explain their looks…they were like judging  us..again..then the look of hurt? I don’t know..it’s just that I have never seen this expressions from them before.

“She’s drunk…let’s just forget this all happened.” I said in a leader like tone.

Jessica shrugged and Tiffany was just staring at me.

‘hey,stop staring…I might just melt :3…Taeyeon you’re not gay! Stop acting like one!’

I was about to carry Yuri to my room but Jessica stopped me.

“go and take a rest.” She said. “I’ll take care of her.”

“you sure?” I asked.

She nodded eagerly.

I nodded back and thanked her.

I grabbed a random chair and sat their silently while sipping on my coffee then I realized that tiffany was still staring at me.

“what was Yuri about to say about you?” she asked.

I almost choke on my coffee.

I faked a laugh and said.

“that was nothing.”

“But she mentioned something about us and you being….”

“I said that was nothing.” My voice went a bit higher which made us both surprised.

She bit her lips and was about to leave.

“Fany-ah…waaaaiiii-aaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!” The cup coffee had spilled on my  shirt. “hoooot!...hot! hot!.”

She quickly went to my side and removed my shirt.

‘great….’

We both blushed when we realized what just happened.

I grabbed my shirt on her hands and covered my body with it.

I faked a cough.

“i..I’ll take a rest.” We said in unison.

We both smiled.

“me too.” We said again unison.

I laughed and went near her.

“sleep tight.” I kissed her forehead.

I winced when her hand brushed on my slightly burned stomach.

“mianhe…does it hurt?” she said while runnine her fingers carefully on my stomach.

‘.’

I nodded like a fool.

“go to my room.’ She ordered.

“excuse me?’ I asked with burning cheeks.

‘why am I blushing?’

“go to my room and I’ll go grab the burn ointment.” She explained with a smile.

I don’t know why but my body was moving on its own. I can treat this burn by myself but my body was having a mind of its own.

I opened her room and there I went to lay on her bed.

I was slowly dosing off as I felt the effect of the alcohol on my blood.

My body feels hot and I almost jumped when I felt a cold gel on my skin.

I held her hands and pulled her towards me. Now Tiffany was lying above me.

I was staring at her intently..watching as her cheeks started to have this pink shade.

“Taeyeon.” She said in a soft tone.

I frowned and pulled her closer to my body.

She stiffened under my arms.

“it hurts like hell…” I whispered at her cheeks. “ and I don’t even know why it hurts…”

I moved my face to the crown of her head.

I closed my eyes as I smell her soft hair.

“it hurts Tiffany…I’m scared…cause it hurts badly…my heart.”

With that said everything turned black.

….

I groaned as I felt someone jumping on bed beside me.

“damn it.”

“she’s awake!”

“YoonA?”  I squinted my eyes.

“Yuri, babo” she hit my head hard.

“Hangover.” I groaned as I caress the part she hit. “where are the others/”

“kitchen.” She sat at the edge of the bed. “and if I were you I’d go straight at it, cause you know Tiffany is walking around the house with just her towel on.” She wiggled her eyebrows with a erted smile.

“You sick ert! Get off my bed!” I kicked her real hard.

“awwww.” She landed on the floor first. “this aint your bed you midget sized gay!.”

I glared at her.

‘not my bed?’

I looked around the room and I realized she was right.

‘pink!pink!pink! everywhere.’

I scratched my head.

‘c’mon brain do your work.’

My attention was caught when I saw Yuri smirking evilly at me.

“oh, Tae, mind explaining/” She pointed my body.

‘O.O my shirt! Where the is it?’

I turned red when I saw her eyes travelling down my whole body.

“yaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!” I covered my body with the blanket.

“psssssh! It’s not like we’ve seen each other’s body.” She got up from the floor and threw me a shirt. “get up and go straight to the kitchen, we still have loads of things to attend to.” She went to the door and closed it.

I sighed.

Then the door went open again.

“I was serious about Tiffany walking with just her towel on.” She winked and I blushed.

“Geeeet! Out you ert!” I threw a pillow at her but she was quick enough to close the door.

I slipped myself and went to the bathroom.

‘ha! I look hot with hangover.’ I checked my reflection on the mirror.

I chuckled at my thought.

“what’s funny?”

I jumped when I saw Tiffany standing at the bathroom’s door with her one hand on the door frame and the other was on her waist. Completely blocking the way.

‘Yuri was right about the towel thingy O.O..ohlala~~’

Dizzy....i feel dizzy….this is too much….

“morning.” I greeted her without looking exactly at her.

She eye smiled at me.

‘stop it! I still wanna live!’

I brushed my mouth and gargled with her watching me.

“I know I look like a mess.” I chuckled.

She giggled.

“you actually look cute with that messy hair and….”she pointed at my shirt. “wait..is that Yuri’s shirt?”

Judging from the mickey mouse printed at the middle of the shirt.

“yeah..I think so.” I scratched my head.

She frowned.

“oh..sorry about last night…”

She blushed.

“…I didn’t mean to sleep at your bed.” I said.

She frowned a bit.

“you were drunk…it was nothing.” She fidgeted.

I nodded with a grin.

“thanks anyways…I feel much better now.” I walked past her and ruffled her hair.

‘to be honest I feel so much much better…it’s like half of what my heart carries was unloaded. Wait..what happened last night?’

“dress up…you actually make other people more confused.” I said shyly.

She stared at me curiously.

“just go.” I bit my lips and went out of the room.

………….

Our manager had arrived and I chose to sit at the last seat on the van.

I was alone there and that was what I needed the most, I wanted to think.

FLASHBACK. At the mall

“milktea?” I asked Tiffany as I gave her my milktea to taste.

She hesitated at first but then she sipped a bit from it.

“Khun hated this drink.” She giggled.

I look at her curiously.

“he hated the after taste.” She look at me with a smile.

I forced a smile and said.

“that was I love about this..the after taste.” I said truthfully.

We feel into silence while we wait for Yuri and Jessica who were buying some takeout food from a resto.

“tae…” she called for my name.

I look at her.

“I love your name…it feels different when I call you.” She confessed.

I frowned a bit not knowing where this conversation is going.

“I love my name too.” I said which made her giggle.

“I love you…”

I stared at her with a confused look.

“as a friend that is…when time comes and I get married I want you to be there as a bridesmaid.” She smiled dreamily.

‘I don’t like where this is going.’

“marriage? Did he asked you to get married?” I choked on my own words.

She shook her head with a laugh.

“that’s crazy! It was against our contract as a girls’ generation member.” She said.

I smiled a bit.

“yeah…but if your not a member or if it was not on the contract, would you marry Khun?” I asked.

She stared at me then to the ring on her hand.

“yes…” she smiled at me.

I tried to swallow the lump on my throat and damn did it hurt.

“is that an engagement ring?” I asked.

She shook her head and laugh.

“How I wish it was. This is just a promise ring.” She said as she twisted the ring on her finger.

I forced a smile.

“good for you.”

….END FLASHBACK…

“Taeyeon.”

I shook my head as I heared someone calling for my name, it was Tiffany.

“you look bothered.” She said in an overly concerned tone.

‘hell I am.’

“am not.” I lied.

“are you sure? You know you can tell me things.” She transferred beside me. She put her hands on both sides of my face, her thumbs caressing my cheeks.

I froze under her touch.

I bit my lips and removed her hands slowly from my face.

“ I’m fine.’

‘are you…”

“I said I’m fine.” I repeated in a colder tone.

I look at the hurt expression on her face.

‘im an .’

“sorry. I was just..just..confused.” I said as I pulled her in for a hug.

‘this is wrong I used to see you as a close friend, as a sister. But now…I can’t even tell if I still feel the same. I’m scared what if Yuri was right? What would happen to me? To us? On our group?....Should I take a step away from you? Can I bear it? Can I do it?...Tiffany Hwang I like you I just don’t know unto what extent it is.’

………………..