PUSH AND PULL
S.W.A.G.(secretly we are gay) (Discontinued)YURI’S POV
When we make decisions, usually one would ponder about the consequences the pros and the cons, the what not’s or even the what if’s.
“.” I ran my free hand through my hair. This is totally not me, acting and deciding on auto pilot out of sheer emotions.
Looking at the GPS on my car, I realized I’m just a street away from Krystal.
Krystal. Jessica’s sister.
With a heavy sigh I continued my way to her, parking my car on an empty space.
My walk turned to a quick jog as I look around the place, looking for Krystal.
Damn it’s cold. I hissed as I pulled my jacket closer to my body.
“Yuri-ah!.” Someone shouted from behind me. Looking back I saw Soojung standing not far away from me, she was wearing her pj’s, hair dishevelled and her eyes we’re slightly red.
I jogged towards her and quickly gave her my jacket. Her head was hanging low while she muffles the sobs she was making.
“Mianhe……” I breathed out.
She looked up at me with a look of surprise and fear.
“I’m sorry it took me some time to come here.” Hesitantly, I pulled her in for a tight hug.
She let out a loud sigh and she held on to me tight.
“you’re here now, that’s what’s important.” She looked up at me with a smile. I nodded and smiled back at her.
“It’s cold here, do you want to go to my car?” I asked. She nodded and we walked quietly back to my car. I opened the door for her and the heater. We sat in silence as we stare at the buildings around the parking lot. I reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze , she then looked down at our hands and smiled.
“Thanks.” She said.
“What for?”
“For coming here, even if you don’t have to.” She entwined our hands.
“hey, don’t say that.” I tucked her hair behind her ears, which somehow made her tense.
“I dragged you into this, I shouldn’t ha…”
“Stop taking all the blame, Yuri.” She gave me a look.
”This isn’t just about you. I made a conscious decision too.”
“I know but I’m the older one here. I should be more sensible.”
“Are you backing up on me now?” Krystal bit her lip.
“What? No!. What I’m saying is maybe, just maybe there’s another way to solve this dilemma without hurting anyone.” Krystal’s hand loosened from my hold as she ran both her hands through her hair.
“What the is wrong with you?” She asked, suddenly exasperated.
“Everything! , this, us, Jessica. Everything is a mess.” I leaned back on my seat and closed my eyes. “Why are we doing this Soojung-ah.”
“I like you!” She shouted. “I like you damn it! I’m doing this because I like you!”
I exhaled loudly and looked straight into her eyes. “Am I worth it?, Do you think I’m worthy enough for you to fight with your sister?”
She kept mum and I continued to speak. “This is a losing battle Soojung, It’s a battle no one would win, a battle where we could all get hurt.”
“You’re so unfair Yuri! You’ve been all on this battle alone, fighting for my sister’s attention but why can’t you ever give me the chance to prove myself to you.” She pushed my shoulder.
“Liking me isn’t enough!” I shouted to give her a little more sense.
“Then fine, I love you!” She shouted. “There I said it!” she sounded more annoyed.
“yah! Why do you make it sound like I forced you!”
“Because you did! You jerk!” Krystal crossed her arm and pouted. ”I was not supposed to tell you I love you, at least not until I’m sure that you’ll love me back. I still need to spare some dignity within me if you ever reject me! ” She exhaled loudly.“I love you, you dense mother er.”
I scratched my head and chuckled.
She totally is not Jessica.
“yah! What’s funny?” she hit my arm. I looked at her still with a wide grin gracing my face. She was obviously pissed off.
“you what?” I pointed myself. She snorted and rolled her eyes.
“Don’t make me repeat myself.”
“Why not?” I pouted.
“Just because…” She glared at me but I just smiled it off.
“ohhhh is Soojungie shy?” I . She hit my arm again and this time it hurts.
“ouch!” I rubbed my arm.
“Are you toying with me huh?” She pulled my collar.
“of course not! I’m being careful here. I seriously don’t want to hurt you Soojung.” I again turned serious.
She gave me a look while she’s still grabbing my collar. “You think I didn’t think this through?” She asked.
I shrugged.
She rolled her eyes again. “I thought about this Yuri, a million times to be honest. I love you for real and I’m ready about anything and everything.” She put down her hand and put it on her lap. Her head hanging low as she spoke again. “P-please give me a chance…please give us a chance.”
My breath hitched at what she said.
Now the tables are turned. Krystal is now in my position and I’m on Jessica’s.
I felt burdened, my mind and heart wants to accept her but then again both want to spare her from the misery ahead.
I took a deep breath and made up my mind. “Soojung-ah mianhe….” I reached for her hand but she flinched.
“Sh*t this feels bad.” She forced a chuckle.
“I don’t want to drag you into this. Believe me I like you, you’re a great lady but—“
“But I’m not Jessica unnie?” She looked at me tears streaming down her face. I wiped her tears.
“mianhe..” She swatted my hand and wiped her own tears.
“stop saying sorry, you’re just making this more awkward.” She rolled her eyes for the nth time.
“So- I hope we can still be friends.” I tried to smile but it turned out to be awkward.
She chuckled lightly. “we’re not even that close on the first place.”
Now that I think of it she was right.
“Well it’s not too late to change that, right?”
She shrugged.
“You can start by calling me unnie.” I grinned.
She snorted. “Fine.”
“Are we good? I mean don’t you hate me.” She bit her lip and pondered for a second.
*SLAP*
My jaw unhinged as I felt the stinging pain on my cheek. “What the hell?! I thought we’re good?” I touched my lip which was bleeding a bit after her nails had scratched it.
Krystal was waving her hand with a pleased smile.
“Gosh, that feels nice.” She laughed, like those laughs from a cold hearted protagonist on a television drama.
She looked at me and nonchalantly wiped the blood.
“Sorry about that. I just had to, you know? Loosen up a bit?” She leaned in to me, so close I could feel her breath on my lips.
*KISS*
“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” I was blushing furiously right now.
“I just had to.” She laughed maniacally.
Oh no! What have I done to her?
“You’re so cute Yuri-ah.” She pinched both my cheeks.
I exhaled loudly. “is this some kind of a revenge?” She shrugged.
“If that’s how you’ll put it, maybe.”
I ruffled my hair, Aigoo~
“I’m going back to our place.” She said. “I’ll keep the jacket.” I just nodded, tired from the emotional roller coaster driven by Krystal. “Walk me up.” She said and I complied. I went out of my car, opened her side of the door and she looked down at my shoes.
Mismatched.
She smiled at me and we walked silently towards their place.
We stood right in front of their door.
“Thank you for everything.”She smiled and hugged me.
I hugged her back and smiled. “Same here. Thanks.”
She was about to open the door when I said. “will you be fine?” I asked, pertaining to Jessica.
“She’s my unnie. We’ll be fine.” She winked at me. “ah! Yuri!” She stopped me. “I won’t help you with unnie.” She chuckled and I nodded.
She closed the door and I made my way down the building.
I feel bad for Krystal, but I feel 100x better for not dragging her into my messy life.
I went inside my car and checked my phone for the time but instead my eyes focused on the message sent by Taeyeon.
-Yuri-ah, where are you? Can we talk? I don’t know what to do….
I quickly replied to her and told her I’m coming back.
“Taeyeon-ah.” I revved up my car and drove towards our place.
Not forgetting to get two bottles of Soju and other random foods.
….
When I went back to our dorm, I saw Sooyoung sleeping at the couch.
I shook her gently and told her to go back to her room but she just groaned. I groaned back and decided to bring her back to her room before going to Taeyeon’s room.
“Taeng?” I knocked on her door. I heard some shuffling and the locked knob clicked. I entered her room and locked the door again.
“What happened?” I asked as I put down the grocery bag.
Taeyeon sat down on her bed as she reached for the bag and rummaged its contents.
She reached for a glass on her bedside table. “She told me to not wait.” She said as she downed the soju.
I exhaled loudly.
I scooted closer to her and tried to console her on a side hug.
“It hurts like Sh*t.” She downed another glass. She stared at the glass on her hand and tears started to flow down her cheeks.
“You know, Yuri-ah. It hurts but I understand her, I really do.” She wiped her eyes, handed me the glass and opened the gummy bears.
“So what’s after all this?” I grimaced as the soju burned on my throat.
“Cry a bit more? Then maybe work….work a lot, then move on?” She said in between eating and drinking.
“hmmm.” I hummed.
“what’s up with you?” She looked at me. “You’re just as wasted as me.” She chuckled.
“I-uh rejected Soojung.” I laid down her bed.
She chuckled. “I should’ve drunk with Soojung then.” She put down the glass and lay beside me.
“I’m tired.” She whispered.
“Metaphorically or literally?” I asked with my eyes closed.
“hmmm…both.” She said as she closed her eyes too.
Silence engulfed us both. One had a broken heart , the other one broke someone else’s.
Great.
“Taeyeon-ah?”
“mmmm?”
“You’ll be fine.”
“You think so?”
“Yep, positive.” Taeyeon chuckled.
“Thanks.” I hummed in reply as we both escape reality.
………………………………………………………..
p.s. I know some of you guys wanted yulkrys but this happened. :P sorry not sorry XD kidding.
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