Put your name in the _____ places!

Enjoy!

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         It's been several weeks since the boys started training. Like I predicted, I haven't seen them very much. Once, to be exact, and it didn't go as well as I had hoped. It was a very intense meeting. However, Taehyung was excited to see me, and he was the only one I really hung out with. The other boys...they were almost avoiding me. I didn't want to say anything to ruin my time with Taehyung, but I could tell the others felt awkward. I enjoyed my time with Taehyung though. After he told me all about training and how hard it was, we started doing things that we used to do with each other. The entire time, though, he was constantly eating snacks I had stocked up because of company rules. Sadly, we couldn't go out because the company said if they get caught with dating rumors, they'd face severe consequences to their career. Taehyung insisted we go after claiming he didn't care what would happen anymore. "The boys have been avoiding me ever since I told them about you," he said, finally revealing why he wanted to spend time with me rather than all of us together. "I shouldn't have said anything to them. I just wanted them to know how you felt after what they did. Now, they seem to hate me for it."

          "Taehyungie, they don't hate you. They're just concerned for their career, and maybe they think you don't care as much," I replied, massaging his neck and shoulders.

          "I do care, but I also care for you, too. I even thought...well nevermind. Maybe they don't understand that I've put my heart into something else too," he said looking at me with his beautiful brown eyes. However, they were different this time. His eyelids sagged, not fully showing his eyes. The glimmer I typically saw when the light hit his eyes disappeared. He looks exhausted and drained in every way. Pushing him a little to the side, I kissed his lips before looking back into his eyes in silence while he smiled at me cutely, and then I helped him sit up straight again while I got behind him to finish his massage. Then a horrible feeling came over me. Wouldn't it be easier for the boys if I wasn't involved anymore? If nothing was tying Taehyung down and practically separating him from his friends? I continued massaging his shoulders for a few minutes before finally speaking up.

          "Well if I'm separating you guys, then we don't have to do this anymore. I don't want to change your relationship with them, you're apart of the group, you have to stay, but I don't. So maybe-"

          "Why would you even say that," he asked angrily, turning to face me. "Is that what you want? I thought you'd be the one to get me through this. All those late nights practicing, I pushed through it for you, knowing you'd be the one cheering me on when we debut. When you were in that surgery, you had a dream where your friend told you to wake up because I was waiting for you. I need you to wait for me this time, _____," Taehyung stated, almost shouting with angry and despair. I looked away, not wanting to see his teary eyes. "It's hard enough without you there. It's hard enough knowing the guys probably don't want me in the group anymore. I don't want to have to choose between my career, you, and my friends. Don't do this to me."

          "Taehyung, I just want what's best for you, and I think it's better for you, your career, and your friends if I'm out of the picture." The boys then called Taehyung to the living because it was time for them to leave. He squeezed my hand before leaving my room, letting a tear fall on my arm as he walked by. He stopped at the door and I looked back at him. After glancing back at me, he continued walking out the door.

          Since that day, Taehyung and I haven't been getting along. Not that we've necessarily been arguing, but we just aren't happy. We don't really talk about anything. The same conversation on repeat. I can sense it in his voice that he feels empty. I can't lie, I feel the same. We still had not talked about what I said that last day either, and I was scared to.

          I've been looking for jobs in my area, but it seems every place is full or is too worried about my recovery. Selling my art is my only option right now, so I've started doing that online. It doesn't make much, but hopefully my online shop will become more popular over time. It's a real chore to almost always be working on an art piece, sometimes customized for certain clients, but I have to do it, because I don't work for the Bangtan boys anymore. The past month or so has been so quiet and lonely without the boys. Despite the fact that they were almost never in their own house, it used to be nice when I could have time to myself somedays. Now, that's all I ever have. Time to myself and my art. Before they started training, I would have treasured this time, but now I'm starting to hate it. I feel almost useless.  

          One late, rainy night, I heard a loud knock come from my front door. After almost smearing my paint across the canvas from the loud, enexpected noise, I put down my supplies to head over to the door. I slowly opened the door to reveal a drenched Taehyung looking down at the ground. He looked up at me slowly, then pushed me aside and let himself in. After closing the door behind him, he pushed me up against the wall gently, but still managing to hit the back of my head against the wall.

          "Oh my goodness, I'm sorry that was supposed to be really y of me, and I just ruined it," he said rubbing the back of my head with his wet hands. I laughed as he tried to brush the pain away from my head, and then he lifted my chin up. I looked up into his eyes, still sensing that emptiness I noticed before. Then he leaned in closer to my face and kissed me. Kissed me hard but also softly at the same time. He moved his hand down to mine and grasped it hard as we kissed. After removing his lips from mine, he rested his head on my shoulder.

          "Taehyungie, what are you doing here? I didn't think you'd be allowed to leave-"

          "I just wanted to see you. I'm allowed to go out, but the only thing they didn't want me to do was come see you. You know what they think about us dating, but I can't make them understand how much you mean to me," he said in almost a whisper. "Do you see what you've done to me? I'm all sappy and soft now," he laughed then dragged me over to the couch in the living room. I ignored his last comment and just jumped straight into the problem. I want a conclusion to this, and hopefully, I'll get one.

          "Well you know what happens when an idol is dating someone. Their partner usually gets hate, the idol gets hate, it really could hurt your career, Taehyungie. I want you to live your dream, but if that means-"

          "No, no, no, no...do not even say it," he stated, then turning to me and holding my hands. "My real dream is to be with someone who can accept me for how I am, someone I can trust, someone I can play around with and not get judged for being childish. I'm finding all of those things in you, so don't say that to save my dream is to not be with you. You are my dream, _____. You are the only one who will ever see me this soft, " he said, laughing, like he always does when it gets awkward for him. "I want to keep doing this idol-in-training thing, but I want to do it with you by my side. We wouldn't be in this company if it weren't for you. You are the reason we are all there."

          "So what you're saying is...I'm stuck with you," I joked, and in immediate reaction, he started to tickle me all over. I pushed his hands away as much as I could before getting off the couch. He laughed and grabbed my hands, and finally, his eyes were back to normal. Shining, full of life, more beautiful than ever.

          "Yes, _____, you are stuck with me, and you better be okay with that," he said patting my head and I nodded my head.

          I wouldn't want to be stuck with anyone else but you.

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Hello everyone! It's been a few weeks since my last update, but I've been busy with college and stuff xc

I had orientation like last week and I spent some time with my boyfriend and his family for his birthday.

Hopefully now that all of that is done, I won't be as busy lol

Only a few more chapters though, thank you guys for reading! I will see you soon!