Ideal Type
Crazy Little Thoughts
I sighed for the nth time. We’re walking towards my place (yeah, Sandara Park and ME). She insisted to have our little agreement kept in private. She said it wasn’t safe to talk about it in a public place so she SUGGESTED that we talk in my house. I protested, of course. I mean, we can have a talk in her place but she said her parents would be there and they’d be likely to disturb us. Now that’s one of the things why I don’t want her to go to my place. I live ALONE that would give her the advantage to do whatever she desires to me. Gah! Scary! Aigoo.
“Where are you parents by the way?”
My parents?
I blinked several times. Out of nowhere, my head suddenly throbbed in pain. I squeezed my eyes shut as the pain intensified. What’s going on? Aigoo.
“Jiyong. . . Jiyong, are you alright?”
As quickly as the pain came, it quickly went away, too. I opened my eyes. Everything seemed in place. I looked at Sandara Park. There was a small frown of worry in her face. “I know what my second condition is” I told her. “Never ask me about my family again” I finished. I don’t know why I said that but I felt like saying it.
A look of surprise came over face. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine”
“You. . . are you sure?”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m sure”
“You. . . you just sounded different” she mumbled.
“I’m fine”
There was a look of hesitation in her face. But then, she slowly nodded. “But I need to know things about you so we’ll appear more believable”
“Let’s just invent a story in regards to my family” I said. I really don’t know why but everytime I think of the word family or parents, I always come with nothing, like a black hole is in front of me. Aish!
“Ugh” she groaned. “We’ve got a lot of memorizations to do”
I clicked my tongue. Poor her. It’ll be hard for her to memorize my profile, for sure. But me, I’ll be having an easy time, ha! I’m sure of it. “Poor you” I told her. “For sure, it’ll be a piece of cake for me. HAHAHAHA!”
“Yeah, right” she snorted. “One thing that girls don’t like is arrogance. So I suggest you tone it down a little”
“I’m just telling the truth!” I defensively said.
She rolled her eyes. “Being modest won’t hurt”
“You’re. . . ordering me to LIE?”
Oh gawd! I don’t lie! It’s a mortal sin.
“What we’re about to do will involve a lot of lies, Jiyong. We’re going to act to make Khunnie and Victoria jealous”
“Oh” I mumbled. “You’re right! How come I didn’t think of it that way?”
“Have you ever had a girlfriend?” she asked out of the blue.
“Nope” I answered. “I’ve got HIGH STANDARDS. Only Victoria qualified to my standards but as we both know, Mikmun poisoned her mind”
“It’s Nickhun” she said. “N-I-C-K-H-U-N”
“Mikmun is easier to remember” I scowled at her.
“Well, if you’re competing against him for Victoria, you have to do everything right”
I pouted. “Fine” I rumbled. “I’ll work on that”
She sighed. “I’m sorry if I’m being harsh to you. I’m just. . . I’m just stressed out”
“I could tell” I snorted. “Girls are usually like that”
She smiled. “You talk as if you know everything about girls”
“I’m a lady’s man. I know everything there. And besides, I’m a keen observer” I arrogantly said.
“Be modest, Jiyong. I’m wondering” she said. “How come I always see you alone? Don’t you have friends?”
“You see, I’ve got standards in choosing my friend, so my list isn’t really that long. My list of friends only include Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Michael Bay, Prince Harry, Oprah and the likes”
She laughed out hard. “Aigoo! You sure aren’t delusional, are you? You should be in a gag show something”
I sighed dramatically. “I was offered a dozen of times to be in a lot of shows but I declined them all. My education is my priority right now. You should be honored because you’re the first person to have the chance to work with me”
She laughed out hard again. “Aigoo! My tummy hurts from too much laughing!”
“You’re not going to fart, are you?” I asked nervously, my eyes narrowing.
I don’t know if she’s just plain stupid or she’s simply shallow because right after I said that, she laughed again. I glanced around me. Good thing no one’s around. For sure, people would look at us and they would immediately assume Sandara Park is a crazy person. Ugh! Could you just imagine the humiliation I’ll go through if that happens? Imagine, Kwon Jiyong has been seen hanging out with a lunatic person? GAWD!
We arrived at my house a few minutes later. Sandara Park was giggling nonstop to herself. I can’t help but roll my eyes and look at her with disgust. Jeez, what’s the matter with her?
“Ya! Can you stop laughing? Let’s get down to business”
“Aigoo!” she giggled, wiping her tears away. “Hold up, I’ll just get myself a glass of water”
“Oh sure!” I said. “Feel at home” I added, grimacing. The nerve! How could she have the guts to do that in my OWN house? I dropped my things on the sofa next to me and yawned out loud.
Sandara Park came back later, holding two glasses of orange juice. “Here, I made you one too”
“Err, thank you” I said, accepting the glass. “Might I remind you, though. This is MY HOUSE”
“I know that” she said, rolling her eyes. “No need to remind me”
“I’m glad to hear you’re aware of that fact”
She didn’t say anything. Instead, she settled the glass on the center table and rummaged through her bad. I lazily took a sip and sighed.
“Here, fill this up” she said, handing me a folder.
“What’s this?” I asked as I accepted the folder.
“Just some questions of your interests, favorites, hobbies, etc” she shrugged. “I’m already done with mine. I’ll give it to you after you finish filling everything up. Then, we’ll have to memorize everything”
“You’re really serious about this, huh?”
“Of course I am” she said.
“And you really planned everything already, huh?”
“Not everything” she confessed. “Just a few things”
“Do I have to finish everything today?”
She hesitated. “Not really but it should be done by tomorrow”
“Jeez, are we racing something here?”
“The more time we allow Khunni and Victoria together, the harder it would be for us to separate them”
“Oh, right” I mumbled. “So, after I fill this up and memorize your personal infos, what would be next?”
“We’re going to have some observations and your makeover”
I grimaced. I honestly think I don’t need a makeover. I’m already satisfied with what I see every morning in the mirror (more than satisfied, actually). I sighed. “Fine. I’ll finish this up today. You can go home if you want. I’ll just call you when I’m done”
“It’s weekend tomorrow” she said.
“So?” I asked, raising a brow at her.
“I’m allowed to stay out late”
I stared at her, horrified. “You’re not. . . you’re not planning to sleep here, a-are you?”
“Originally, I don’t have plans but it depends on how fast you’ll finish answering everything and be-.”
“Aish!” I growled. “I should finish this then. Don’t talk to me so I can concentrate”
I can feel myself frowning as I pulled all my energy and concentration in answering all the person questions. Gah! I HAVE TO FINISH THIS TODAY!
“I’ll be here with you the whole day tomorrow though since we’re going to memorize some stuff and have some stories. . . polished”
I’m already starting to regret agreeing to her stupid plan.
I didn’t notice it’s been a week already. Time was too slow! Gah! Even if I don’t want to spend my spare time with Sandara park (I’m really a VERY busy person); even if I want time to tick quickly so we’ll have less time together, I can’t. I don’t really have a choice, do I? I swear, I’m so. . . I’m so. . . it’s hard to explain but I feel like puking off Sandara Park’s presence. We’ve been spending too much time together. There were times that I wanted to quit but Victoria’s face would always pop into my mind. Ah, my love, you don’t know how willing I am to do everything just for you. Ha! I will cross the ocean for you, I will – wait, that’s a song, right? Ahaha.
We don’t have any problems with memorizing each other’s personal infos. She memorized everything in just a day while I. . . well, it took me longer than that. But she can’t blame me, can she? I have no interest knowing anything about her AT ALL so I had difficulty memorizing things about her. You know what they say, once you’re not interested in something, you’ll never achieve something from it. She should be grateful I managed to memorize everything even if I don’t have interest in her AT ALL (I really think she cheated, too! I mean, how could she possibly memorize everything in just a day? I just don’t know how she managed to do that).
“You should learn how to be. . . modest or less delusional” she told me.
“I’m just being honest” I shrugged.
“That would have to change” she said. “After classes we’ll be watching and listening to some guys and you have to observe them”
“Ugh!” I groaned. “This is troublesome”
“I know” she sighed. “But think of what the prize would be at the end”
I tried picturing the end of the road, of what will happen after all this trouble I’m going through. With an image in my mind, I smiled. “I’ll be with Victoria”
“And I’ll be with Khunnie again”
“But. . .have you ever thought of what will happen to us if we fail in breaking them up?”
“I don’t want to think about it” she said. “I strongly believe we’ll succeed”
I sighed. “But I want to get Victoria by being MYSELF. If there’s a chance that she’ll like me, I want her to like the real me”
She was silent. “Victoria. . .” she stalled. “She’s not really a humorous person. I doubt she’ll laugh at your jokes”
I growled. “I haven’t tried throwing a joke. Everything I say comes straight from my brain. And how can you talk about my Victoria like that? You talk as you’re close to her”
“Victoria and I. . . we’re friends before”
“Before?” I asked.
She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about that anymore” she said.
- - -
I thought I knew everything already but I realized I was wrong. I found out girls have reasons to play hard to get sometimes. I must admit I’m pretty disappointed with what my fellas showed me when Sandara Park and I took on a mission of observing some guys and how they move and talk on their date.
The one thing that’s bothering me after a few days of observation is the flow of conversation between a girl and a boy. Boys talk less compared to their girlfriends or dates. They just usually listen, nods in agreement and smile. Gah! It’s really bothersome!
Sandara Park also told me that once in a while, I have to say the opposite from what I really want, that instead of pleasing myself, I should think of pleasing the other part first. That would be hard too since I usually just speak what’s inside my head. And oh, that’s not just it. She also said that sometimes I have to think that I’m just second best from the other guys or the rest of the guys.
“Just what I read before” she said. “‘If you can’t amaze people with your intelligence, confuse them with your stupidity’”
Huh?
What did she say?
“Did you just call me stupid?”
She looked at me with a tired expression. “Never mind:
“So. . .when am I going to have a makeover”
“Why do you sound so excited? As far as I remember, you were quite against it”
“I’m NOT looking forward to it” I defensively said. “I just can’t wait to implement the plan of making them jealous”
“Maybe we’ll have the makeover tomorrow” she yawned.
“Why can’t we do it now?” I demanded.
“It’s already nine in the evening, Jiyong”
I glanced t my watch. “Oh right. Hahaha. I didn’t notice the time”
“Time flies when you’re having fun”
I grimaced. “I’m not having fun with you”
“Jiyong, remember what I said about thinking of pleasing the other party?” she scolded. “From now, you have to agree with everything I say and you have to pretend that the only thing you want in this world is to be with me”
“I’ll do that after the makeover”
“Fine”
Gah! Why am I doing almost everything in this deal? i have to watch videos and imitate the stupid boring guys, eww. I can't wait for this deal to end!
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