A week later….

Sungyeol’s POV

“Hey, are you ready?” I turned. Dongwoo hyung asked me that question again. And now, I finally come back home after a while. I’m standing awkwardly in front of my own house with Dongwoo and Hoya hyung. They fetched me at the hospital just now.

“Well, don’t you guys ever treat me like a sick person,” I responded.

We entered the house with light feet. I saw Myungsoo lying on the floor happily alone while reading comics. Wait, that’s my comic! How dare he read it without my permission!

I quickly ran to him and grabbed his collar. Those two hyung suddenly shouted NO to me. And I was surprise. They gave me a death glare, so do this brat, Myungsoo.

“You don’t want us to treat you like a sick person right? So, act like one stupid.” Hoya hyung growled. What?! Stupid?

I suddenly stand up on my own. I suddenly felt very angry when he said that word. Back then, I never felt anything when they say those words to me because I’m used to it. But now, I don’t know. Everything kinda hurt me actually.

Dongwoo hyung quickly standing between us. He really don’t want us to start a fight, when Anna was here. I heard the knocking sound of pans. Well, there must me Woohyun hyung and Anna preparing the lunch for us.

“I’m sorry,” Hoya hyung whispered. Hearing from the tone, I know he was sincere. He quickly hugging each other when we saw Anna came to the living room with Woohyun hyung.

“What’s going on?” I heard Anna’s angelic voice asking us.

“Well, nothing happen by the way.” I answered. She was so surprise that I was back. Without realizing, the whole house was full with her screams. She really seems happy when I was back.

We’re hugging. I smell her scents. Her hair, smells like green apple. Her warm body, gave me the warm that I’ve loose now days. 

“I miss you,” she whispered. I’m melting.

“I miss you more.” I said. She’s blushed with my words.

“You smell good Yeolli!” she said cheerfully.

“Well guys, can you stop hugging please?” Woohyun hyung teased. I quickly pushed her lightly to the side. She was blushing. I felt terrible when I hugged her just like that in front of my brothers. They all were smiling like an idiot. Thank God Sunggyu hyung wasn’t here. Maybe he would pull my ears so hard if he saw me hugging publicly with her.

“I’ll go prepare the lunch.” She walked to the kitchen and leaves us behind. Truly she was ashamed with it. N

I sat on the couch and the TV. Myungsoo was sitting beside me and still in his own world. I don’t know what he is babbling about. I can’t understand anything.

Dongwoo hyung choose to lie on the floor and rolling happily with his bamboo pillow. Hoya hyung was inside in his room. The living room was in silent, no one of us was talking. Only the voice of the MC’s Yoo JaeSuk was talking nonstop. I felt uncomfortable when I realize that Dongwoo hyung keep looking at me.

“What hyung?” I asked. It’s been 10 minutes he looking at me without words.

Dongwoo hyung keep rolling happily on the floor. He didn’t answer my question. That‘s what make me feel annoyed.

Myungsoo suddenly grabbed my hands. I turned to him and asked, “What’s wrong?”

“So how you gonna do with her?” he asked me back.

“That’s what I wanna ask you just now,” Dongwoo hyung interrupted.

“Well, I don’t know yet.” I said while looking at both of them.

“Can’t you just tell her about this?” suddenly Hoya hyung joined the conversation. We’re sitting facing each other. This is just like a big meeting like we used to do back then. Oh, I miss that moment.

“No. She cannot know about this. Never.” I said firmly.

“Secrets couldn’t be keeping it forever, Sungyeol-ah.” 

“Think it again. This is not involving just your heart but both of you.”

“There’s just one thing for you to do if you don’t wanna tell her about this,”

 “What?” I responded to Myungsoo’s words.

“Leave her.” he said with a troubled tone. He was really serious at that time. He’s just like being the other Myungsoo that I know.

“No, I can’t.” I said with a tearfully. If this problem can be solve by a break up, I can’t. I really can’t.

“But if you still like this, she would be hurt.”

“Maybe you just tell her everything. She wouldn’t be that sad if she knows and at least, she will be by your side, you wouldn’t fight alone.”

I looked at Hoya hyung who said that words just now to me. Even though he was a hot tempered guy, I realize that he stills has his soft side and that’s what make me kinda comfortable sometimes. I keep thinking about their words. Well, do I have to tell her like what’ve Hoya hyung said? Or die I have to leave her like what’ve Myungsoo told me for her own sake?

Arghhhhhhhhhh! I can’t. I really can’t.

“Guys, come on. The lunch is ready.”

We leave the conversation just like that. I don’t wanna think about it again. Just let it be. I don’t wanna to think about it for a while.  I juts wanna spent my days with her. I don’t know if I have next time to spend with her, with my family.

I just eat the meals silently even though the dining table was so noisy with their voice, their jokes. This table wasn’t complete. There’s no Sunggyu hyung and Sungjong. Sunggyu hyung was away with his jobs. The maknae, he was out to Busan for a camp. Suddenly, I miss him. I miss to watch Sungjong’s crazy dance again.

“Yeolli, why wouldn’t you eat more?”

I smiled. She was too concerted to me lately.

“I’m full. I just eat this whole bowl and I was already full.”

“Eat more. You look skinner than always.”

“You’re the one who should eat more. Not me, I’m fine. I’m okay.”

Am I really okay?

Woohyun’s POV

Everybody was sleeping at the gazebo. I couldn’t take a nap. I don’t know why. After having a feast with them just now, they decided to play some games and ended up sleeping. Only I and Anna were doing all the chores, washing all the dishes.

I went to my room. I saw Sungyeol was sitting on Gyu hyung’s bed, crying. I tip toed to him slowly and took a place at my own bed. He doesn’t aware that I was there with him. He was crying while holding the family album. I caressed his back gently, giving him strength to fight this hardship.

Since he was diagnosed with this disease, he was totally changed.  He doesn’t be choding anymore. His elementary school kid expressions were totally gone. Now, there’s just a serious sad looking was Sungyeol. No more choding, no more pranking and no more laughing for the last few months.

I really miss my old choding brother. I really do.

I just watched him crying silently. He didn’t hold up his head. Gyu hyung’s bed was wet with his tears. I can’t say anything. I just froze myself and watched him. It was so heartbreaking. I wonder why he was crying like that. Is that because of what they’ve said to him just now? I don’t know what they’re discussing because I was busy helping Anna preparing the lunch.

30 minutes later, he stops crying. He gave me a pathetic look. I gave him a warm smile in return. I gave him tissues and he wipes all his tears. Then, we sat down while leaning our back against the wall. We’ve been silent for a while. I can’t say anything, so do him.

“Hyung, should I let her go?”

Suddenly Sungyeol broke the silence.

“Why should you?” I asked again.

“I don’t want her to know all of this.”

“Why?”

“She said to me, she was afraid of losing her love ones.”

“So, what are you gonna do?”

“I don’t know. What should I do hyung?”

“Why won’t you just tell her everything?”

“I can’t,”

“That’s your problem, Sungyeol-ah.”

“I’m just afraid that she might be the old her back, living in her own dark world.”

“And you? Aren’t you worried that you’ve no more choding in yourself?”

He seems taken aback of my words.

“What do you mean hyung?”

“You’re not the elementary school kid that I used to know,”

I let out a heavy deep sigh.

“I’m sorry hyung. I also don’t realize when this choding self of mine was gone.”

“Be the old Sungyeol back, I don’t like this new one.”

“Why hyung? I’m still Sungyeol.”

“I know. But to me you’re not. Look at now, you seems pathetic. You cried all day and you didn’t even smile as always.”

“I’m sorry hyung. I was really worried these days. I’m worried of Anna. What am I gonna do with her?”

“Tell her everything. She might be understood.”

“No,”

“Why wouldn’t you?”

“I’ll never tell her. Never.”

“Then, you don’t have to cry about this over and over again. Just do what you wanna do like you’ve said just now then,”

“But what am I suppose to do when she found out?”

Aigoo, this kid really…….

“That’s why I said, tell her everything. Or leave her. Don’t you break her then?”

“But I really love her.”

“Every decision right now is on your shoulders, Sungyeol-ah. You need to decide, not me. Not our siblings.”

He started to cry again. I just let him let out everything and continued to freeze myself again next to him. What should I do? Even he doesn’t know how to do. I understand his feelings. He was fighting with his own wills.

“Sungyeol-ah, I know you love her so much but this isn’t the right things to do. You have to do something in order to save your relationship. For me, I also feel sorry for her. She live happily, I can still she smiling. You couldn’t just stay here and crying all day. If fate said this ended up with break up, you still can do something to change it. For us, for me, breaking away is a part of our daily routine life. At the end of time, with all our hard work, the fate would changes as we please.”

I tapped his back softly. I suddenly hugged me and started to cry again on my shoulder.

“Just cry. I would give you my shoulders, as much as you want more than my words. Please Sungyeol, be the old you back. Everything would be fine, after a while. After you’ve endured everything right now. Just stay strong and be choding as always. No one wouldn’t be loved. Everyone does. Everybody loves by everybody.”

Yes, everyone should deserve to be love. You. Me. Family. Friends. The world.