Prompt : Don't play with fire if you're not willing to burn

They said “don’t play with the fire if you’re not willing to burn”.

That’s true. Every single word of it is true, because I’ve been there and done that. I’ve burned. Burned down to ashes. Burn till I couldn’t be save. Burn by someone that I never knew could done it to me, but who am I to tell one true nature? A part of him that he hidden behind his mask this whole time? 

Should I blame him for hurting me?

Should I blame my friend who encourage me? 

Should I blame his friend? 

Or should I blame myself for being too naïve? 

For not listening to my own heart when in doubt?

For still not learning the lesson that have been thought to me since childhood?

I know that blaming him would not make any difference now nor will blaming myself. I know that I shouldn’t keep lays on the floor with my head down, wishing that my heart will heal as time passed by. 

I know I should stand up and keep on walking. I know I should fight my way to stand still, not letting the emotional take over my life completely. I know I should move on and be strong. I know I should be running away from this heartache.

I know but I couldn’t. It so easy to say, so easy to tell but it’s hard to do. It very hard and every step that I take, the wound won’t heal. It just won’t heal and keep on bleeding. The stiches I sew won’t stop the pain from continuing making me suffer.

Time heal all wounds.

Yeah. That crap didn’t work at all. It didn’t do any help to me. No matter how long I’m bearing this pain, time won’t heal it. Time didn’t do anything to heal me. It might heal physical pain but I don’t think that saying could be apply to emotion pain. Or perhaps, it just didn’t work for me. 

Anyway, it didn’t work for me and won’t work at all. I can just throw that away from my dictionary, erase and shred it into tiny pieces so that I can’t revive it back into my life. Perhaps I should just burn it into ashes so there’s no way I can glue it together again.

It’s no used.

It’s just no used.

Sigh. 

I get up from bed and walk toward the bathroom to freshen up myself. To wash all the regrets, all the unnecessary heartache, and all the foolishness. Let all of it flow with the cold water through the drain, go to the place far from here. To go wherever it want to go, as long as it not here.

I went downstairs after feeling a bit better for a cup of coffee. It always coffee that accompany my morning, and nothing is better than a cup of hot coffee. Sipping bit by bit, enjoying it till I empty a cup before pouring for another cup.

There’s time when I wonder why do people must hurting each other? Why can’t we live in peace? Live surround by love? Be loved and love other? Why can’t we just live like a fairy tale story?

Wait, let me take that last sentence back because in fairy tales, there’s always evil present. On the second thought, all the stories around us contain some evil inside. There’s no story that didn’t have that element. At least, not that I’ve known of. Even in a children stories there’s that element. 

Maybe our life need that in order for us to feel love. Maybe without it, we won’t realise tha