After the school ended us; meaning Yong Sook and I went to grab something to eat. Nothing fancy since he needed to get to work. Anyway, he told me about how it was at the orphanage. That it had changed a lot since I left. But it was something with the way he described everything that made me feel bad.

How I wished that he had gotten adopted as well, to a better place than that orphanage. It wasn’t like I despised it, well, sort of. But it was because they weren’t really that nice to the kids. If one would do something wrong, you would first get a few hurtful words, then a few slaps and lastly you had to sleep in a cold, dark room by yourself. And it hadn’t been better, that the older kids had told the younger ones about how that room where haunted by children had been beaten to death there, so that room wasn’t a place where you wanted to stay the night at.

Another thing, there weren’t that many nannies either, so kids could beat each other up pretty badly without anyone even noticing. Luckily was that something I didn’t get to experience. But I know Yong Sook did.

It was two older kids, both of them boys. It was a late afternoon, right after dinner and Yong Sook and I where about to play soccer when they came out and said that they wanted the ball. Yong Sook told them no and instead told them that they could join in since he had waited the whole day and thus really wanted to play.

But they didn’t want to.

Instead they ran up to Yong Sook and started to punch on him so that he fell to the ground. I where too afraid to even do anything, I couldn’t even scream. It was as if all my capability floated out of me in an instant. All I did was to watch them kicking and hitting Yong Sook all over.

I don’t know how long it took before someone actually noticed what was going on and made the boys stop before it was too late. My feet’s broke free from the ground and I hurried towards his lifeless body, because that where exactly what it was. He must’ve fainted due to the shock.

He had received multiply kicks and hits to the stomach and head, so he needed to get to the hospital fast, just in case something had broken inside his body. I had watched in fear as the ambulance drove away and I understood what had happened and that I where such a coward.

But they where boys, both of them, and the only thing they did was to hurt people. And for me to experience all that was just another reminder. Luckily he hadn’t suffered something major, just a few bruises and cuts.

Not long after that, the Yoo family paid a visit to the orphanage and thus my life there ended and I fallowed them home like some dog. For several years I have suffered, but now I’m finally free, at least for now. Still I needed to find an apartment; it was too much trouble living in a hotel, not to mention that it never really feels like a real home.

My body froze as I heard how my cell phone started to ring.

No one would call at this hour except for one person, the one and only I never wanted to talk to ever again, thus that, I still found myself answering the call.

“Hi sweetie.”

I cringed by just hearing his awful voice, I stared out in space as he continued speaking. He told me that he missed me. No. He didn’t miss me, what he missed was to hurt me, to take advantage of me. That was what he missed, nothing else.

“Shut up, just shut up.” I roared into the phone. It was my first time I defended myself, and it felt great, to feel all the adrenalin running in my veins. Yet, I where a bit surprised that it had taken me this long.

My outburst must’ve gotten to him because he suddenly changed his playful tone into a scarier one, the one he always would use when he needed to shut me up.

“Do you really believe that you’ve gotten away, don’t you think I won’t find you? I promise you one thing, if you ever tell anyone about what I’ve done to you, I’ll kill you. Understood?” he threatened me, just like usual. Though, this time I didn’t even feel afraid. Because how where he going to find me? Seoul consisted of over ten million inhabitants. And it wasn’t like he could kill me during school.

“I’m not scared of you anymore.” I shot back.

“You will once I find you.” he retorted back and I deep down inside I could feel how his words stuck, it didn’t matter that I where here. His words still got to me, despite that I didn’t want them to, I where still afraid of him. But hopefully he wouldn’t hear it through my voice.

“That’s the problem, you won’t. You will never find me.” it was almost as if I believed it myself, but on the counterpart, I knew that he would find me. One day he would. And it was nothing I could do about that. The only thing I could do was to be alert, because then I had a bigger chance of escaping his claws.

“Oh I will, believe me.”

The tone he used when telling me so sent shivers down my spine, because I knew I did believe his words, unfortunately but true. I ended the call and then sent my phone flying across the room; it hit the wall opposite of me before it crashed down on the floor and broke. I couldn’t care less whether it broke or not. Because it meant that Sangmin wouldn’t be able to call me anymore.

Still, I couldn’t hide the fact that I where scared. Scared over the fact that I knew what he where capable of, and I knew that he didn’t care whatever he hurt me or not.

With all that fresh in mind, I went to bed. Though, it took me quite a while to fall asleep. What if he would try and hurt me in school? Hopefully Yong Sook would be there, so he could help me. That’s if he had forgiven me about that I didn’t help him back at the orphanage.