Wednesday, April 25th 12:35:20 pm

"I can already tell that this is going to ." The nurse looked at me to translate what he said and I just smiled at her before glaring at Junhong. I don't know if it was his natural instinct to speak our dialect around me, or he was just doing it to spite the medical staff, but I was getting tired of having to translate over and over words they couldn't understand... most of the swear words. Apparently, Youngjae had taken a turn trying to translate while I was in petty jail, and that ended up in a PTSD flashback with Junhong's hands around his neck. That's why I was finally released out of my hotel confines, even with the investigation not having wrapped up. I hope Younfjae saw me smiling at his bruises when I walked in.

"On three we're going to help you push off of the ground. It will be a little weak because you've been laying for three weeks, but a few steps should wake your legs back up. Try really hard to only put your weight on your good leg or it will be very painful. We have to build up your leg in therapy." I sat in the armchair next to his bead and watched the two nurses lift him up to stand on the ground. He tried to hide his discomfort but I could hear the swear words under his breath as they made him walk a few steps. Seeing him stand at full height for once made me realize how tall he had become. The tallest out of all three of us. 

"Jun, is that the leg you broke before?" The nurses looked over at me confused and then back to his chart. Oh, they didn't have any prior medical history. That would be my fault for being hyperfocused on Mark and not filling those out. 

"No, it was the other one." He was concentrating now on taking steps in a circle while one nurse was still holding onto him. 

"Has there been any other major injuries that you've had? On the chart here we only have that you were shot in the leg once before, but only hitting muscle." It was me that she was looking at and when I had seen Junhong's bare skin while they were changing our bandages, I knew that he had suffered more injuries than he would say. Countless pale scars had lined his chest and I saw a few more mediums sized ones on his legs. I think the nurses also had their suspicions as to why someone would be so scarred up with a small medical history. They'll just have to deal with that. 

"I don't think there has been anything else. Jun?" The nurse sat him down in the wheelchair as his legs were exhausted from their tiny laps and he shook his head. I was looking at him, well, glaring at him, giving him a silent message that we were going to talk about that later. 

Over these few weeks, I had created a list in my phone of all the things Junhong and I had to discuss. It was really quite long and I think every day I added at least three things. What are all the scars? How did they treat you in Alpha? Did they tell you about when I was in Alpha? What did you do when I left? Why don't you like carrots anymore? They ranged from serious to stupid, but most of them didn't have a good time to be asked. Especially the Alpha ones. I'd sit up at night thinking about what they did or how they treated him and my body's reactions alone told me it would be too hard for Junhong to remember those same things. I was also afraid of what he had to say about the third question. 

"Kim-sshi," I looked up at the nurse with his chart, "If you want to take him to the cafeteria while we fix his chart? Have him walk on his crutches down this hallway when you come back." I nodded and stood, pushing Junhong out of the room. Once I exited, Good Youngjae followed. He was my watchdog today. 

"You said it would be a few days and they would stop following us. Why are they all still here?" Junhong looked up at Youngjae and he smiled back. 

"I'm following orders so I don't lose my job. I also am paying for your lunch since I ordered us takeout." Food was how to get Junhong to agree with you and he already had no distaste for Youngjae, so that's all it took for him to be satisfied. They had also talked a few days ago about the steps it would take for Junhong to become a doctor. He literally had to follow Youngjae's footsteps, so it was a good pairing, even if Jun said he had no interest in getting to know the group. 

"What's on the menu this time Doctor Choi?" I pushed the button to the ground floor. 

"Wait, your name is Choi too?.. Interesting." Junhong had to shut down interest before Youngjae caught on. Even if he said he had no interest in learning about the people who watched him, he was easily put up a front. I knew he wanted to know everything about everyone... specifically the man who jumped in front of him. There had only been bits and pieces they told him about Mark, but someone said to him it was up to me to finish the story. 

"Ddeokbboki. I heard you liked spicy food Junhong, so I paid no expense to get it."

"Isn't it spared no expense?" He shook his head the elevator doors opened to the lobby of the hospital. Multiple food delivery people were standing in wait and Youngjae walked towards one. 

"It's the waitress I talked about." He winked before heading all the way over. 

Junhong was looking around, staring at everyone and everything. This hospital was the biggest in the country and had giant screens in the lobby displaying visitor instructions and commercials for upcoming dramas. There were also times when I saw him stare at pretty girls who walked in, but I thought I'd spare him the embarrassment of being caught. However, Youngjae didn't. 

"The redhead that walked in is a colleague's nurse. She's a bit older, but if you're into noonas I ca-" Junhong glared daggers into him. 

"I have no idea what the you're talking about." 

"Language." 

"I'm literally twenty-one." I spun him around fast in the wheelchair and he had turned the daggers in my direction. 

"If you're twenty-one, why are you embarrassed that Youngjae wants to hook you up with a nurse?"

"I'm... That's not..." Youngjae and I laughed as we walked over to the cafeteria to find a free table. 

Buzz. Buzz. 

From Mark Tuan: Jackson said the investigation should wrap up in two days

To Mark Tuan: Did they get you to sit up today? Junhong started crutches. 

From Mark Tuan: Yes and it hurt like a . I'm sitting up now though. 

To Mark Tuan: That's what Junhong said too 

"Who you texting?" 

"Yugyeom." I quickly lied and put my phone away, opening the takeout bag. 

"Who?" Junhong tried to grab at my phone and I put it over on my other side. 

"Someone you'll have to meet when you're not in the hospital." 

"I mean he is a twenty-one-year-old guy who's probably only been around grown men." I shook my head and shifted my head to rest on the window. 

"Well if their missions were anything like ours, I don't think he's been around only men. Besides, he lived in South Korea for a while as a TA. You know how many people said he was handsome when we were interviewing him on that campus. It's just interesting to see him stare like that." 

"He was brainwashed for a while. It could be the first time he's been freely able to look... or maybe he's just looking at the clothes or something. Again, it's his first time not under control of the North. What was the first thing you did?"  I thought about it and it felt like it was such a long time ago when I was forced into asylum. There was one event that stuck out in my mind when thinking about my stay at the hospital. 

"Besides fighting with you every hour, I broke up with Song Mino." He made a 'huh' noise like he remembered that time and was amused as well. I hadn't seen him since that day and thank god for that. 

"I remember that. He punched me. You didn't seem to really break his heart because I think he had a new girlfriend three weeks after that." I laughed and nodded. Seems right. 

"He really was going to marry me too. It makes me sick to my stomach." I made a noise to illustrate my point. 

"Marriage to him or just in general?" I waved my hand once, hoping he saw. 

"As of now, all of it. Youngjae ruined it for me." 

"What did I ruin?" I turned swiftly shoving the phone in my back pocket. 

"How did you get in my room?" He held up a bag and I realized it was his turn to deliver dinner. I wanted to eat it with Junhong, but he had his first session of therapy today so they gave him an early dinner. 

"What did I ruin?" Do I hang up on Mark? I didn't have time to reach into my pocket and unlock my phone to hang up. I also knew that if Youngjae was involved, Mark wouldn't hang up. I just decided to sit down on my bed and pull over the nightstand. Youngjae sat down across from me and put the bag down. Great. 

"Don't you have dinner to eat somewhere else?" He glared at me and set two boxes of noodles up. 

"I was on my way to buy myself dinner when Jackson said he couldn't babysit you tonight. I bought this with my own money too. Just eat it and answer my question." Jackson has yet to speak to me after that night in the hotel room. Whenever I had dinner with him, he'd drop it off and leave. If he had to watch me, it was from a distance of 10 feet and preferably outside of the room. He hadn't even talked to Junhong once and he slowly started to dislike Jackson too. I had to defend him right there and then, hoping he'd hear the nice things I said about him. It still made me worried that he was angry this long. Mark and I talked about it and he had never seen Jackson like this before. The one who welcomed me to South Korea and into his house with open arms was now the one who seemed to hate me the most. He had at least said a few things to Mark. 

"A lot of things, Youngjae. Specifically, tonight's dinner." He rolled his eyes and dug into his noodles. He seemed to come in a rush, which was good because he couldn't think of the manipulative things he'd say to me. After the scene in the family room, whenever he could he would pretend he'd care about my injuries or about Junhong. He even took the liberty of changing my bandages, shooing the nurse away every time. It was just annoying to say the least. It did absolutely nothing to stir my heart as he wanted. The only thing it did was make me think over and over again about the scenario on the track and in the family room. What was his motive other than trying to, somehow, win me back? He knew that was a stupid thing to try and do. 

"As you can tell by my attire that I wasn't planning on coming. Who were you talking to?" I pointed to the window and I shrugged turning. I wonder if Mark could still see me from the window. 

"Youngjae. He wants to continue my sessions soon." 

"You haven't had an episode in a while though. Do you really need them?" I raised an eyebrow and took my first bite of noodles. Mustard and vinegar. So maybe he planned a little bit. 

"My nightmares and I say yes." He shrugged and looked out the window again. He just stared and was thinking of his next attack. 

"So marrying me makes you sick to your stomach." I almost choked on my noodle and I heard a noise from my back pocket. He was still listening. 

"How much did you hear?" I leaned back, hands behind my head, and looking at the ceiling. 

"I walked in on that part. Where I ruined marriage for you. We weren't even married, but okay." Was he hurt? He sounded like it. Was it bad I felt no remorse? 

"Is it true that I won't get married because of you? No. Is it true that I get a bad taste in my mouth when thinking about? Yes. Blame your parents or how you treated me." That was really bold for me to say, but something made me feel confident saying it. Perhaps it was because I knew Mark was listening and watching the window. 

He rolled his eyes, "I told you why I did what I did. As for my parents... They just wanted the best for their son. Can you blame them? They also didn't want another scandal on their hands."

"And that's why they killed my father?" He tensed up and looked over at me. We were both calm, but the type that was scary. I knew that he'd probably start something now. I was being disobedient and that's what he hated the most. 

"And that's why they offered you their house, their food, and clothes on your back. I can't control how my parents treated you." 

"But you could control how you treated me." He rolled his eyes again and put down his chopsticks, rolling up his hoodie sleeves. Now it was time to get into a fight. It was coming, I could feel it. 

"I'm sorry for treating you the way I did, but you can see I'm trying to make up for it now. You hating me make it worse for you. It's ridiculous that you refuse to let me see Junhong and are always standoffish when we talk." That made me stop breathing for a second. Did he just... 

"What made it switch, huh? A few weeks ago you were yelling at me about being around Ma..." I stopped, trying to filter the conversation we were having. If I brought up Mark, Youngjae doesn't know he's listening and won't hold back. 

"I lost interest in you when I left for South Korea. If I left, you might forget me and succumb to Youngguk. When you came to South Korea and lived with me, it reminded me of before. My apartment outside of the base. I started gaining interest again and wanted to save you too. You have to remember I helped you defect. Then, I saw you get hurt after looking for you for weeks on end. I thought they took you back to the North. I gained feelings for you again and you kept pushing me away. I had to watch you get hurt over and over again and I couldn't do anything about it. I thought giving you directions could make it stop. Mark was the reason you were getting hurt and if I told you to stay away from him then it wouldn't happen anymore. Obviously, you couldn't stay away from him. That's why when YuRa called for someone else, I was the first one up. I couldn't tell you to stop, so I guess I'll just take matters into my own hands and protect you from him. Do you remember how you almost got killed because of Youngguk? It replayed in my head as I kneeled down and then I had to act like I didn't care. I had to drag you back from that hotel room in Tibet. I wasn't going to watch you get killed for someone like that again. I wasn't going to let you get hurt again. Did you feel who pushed you away from Mark when he jumped? I thought she would shoot at you. I was the one who went to protect you, not Tuan. Yet, here you are talking to him on the phone." My mouth dried up. 

"You really think he cares about you, Yon-ah. You thought Yongguk did too. Just like Yongguk, Mark only thinks about himself. You don't think he jumped in front of Jun because he wanted the glory of saving your brother? You don't remember Yongguk saving you from the Russian because he wanted you to fall deeper into his trap? I watched everything Yongguk did because I had no other choice. Now, I'm watching it happen over again with Mark. When do you think he'll leave you to die as Yongguk did? You thought he would come and save you after you were shot and Cheif Ahn touched you. He just watched and walked away because he never cared about you. You had gotten weak and need to be disposed of. Mark is going to dispose of you after you're done with your training because he never cared about you. I'm the only one who has ever said anything about loving or caring about you." I grabbed the phone and put it to my ear. 

"MeeYon, listen that isn't ing-"

"I'll talk to you later." I threw it on the bed, standing up. My knuckles were turning white with how hard I was gripping them. I knew that soon blood would be flooding my bandages too. 

"I'm glad he heard that. Maybe he'll change before it's too late. I should tell Jackson about how you two have been talking at night all week." He was just sitting there, still calm. He knew he'd won. I was the one who was mad and about to lunge over the table to attack him. 

I will help you get your brother back and the NIS, under my word, will not use you. I care. I trust you. 

. If Youngjae doesn't stop, I'm going to have another episode. The voices echoing in my head were always a sign. 

"Youngjae, there is absolutely nothing going on with Mark and me." He tsked and shook his head. 

"You're falling for him. I know that. I've seen how you did with me and with Yongguk. The telltale signs are there. I may know nothing about what you've said to each other, but I do know that I have to stop it before you're hurt by someone who only cares for themselves." 

"You only care about yourself. You, you, you. When I was whimpering in the cold, beaten and bruised, assaulted nightly, you didn't do anything. You sat by and smiled as they did it. You gave them permission!" 

"Hey, hey. Slow down there, Princess." I looked up at Daehyun who was practically chasing me to the base. He put his arm around me and I tried to shrug it off. 

"Youngjae said I could. I know I'm not the one you like, but I could help you get Yongguk to like you if help me." I narrowed my eyes at him and kept walking, trying to get to the women's dorms before I was pulled away. It was my only escape. 

"Youngjae wouldn't say that."

"You'd be surprised what he says about you when you're not around. Makes me wonder a lot of things." He gripped me harder so I had to stop walking and tilted his head, "Do you really have a birthmark on your lower back?" 

"You're crazy if you think I willingly let them do that to you. You knew how much I cared about you." I shook my head again and pushed the noodles off the table, leaning forward. 

"You cared for me for a year-and-a-half. Then when you saw you could use me for promotions, nothing mattered to you anymore. You used me as your father used mine." He huffed once and I stared right in his eyes. 

"Youngjae." He was sitting outside on a rock, a book in his hands. He tilted his head to the left and looked me up and down. 

"You look better than I thought you would." I lowered my gaze, my knuckles turning white.

"You knew?" He nodded and put the book down.

"He's my superior, I had to listen. It's probably wasn't that ba-" I ed my uniform, opening up to expose my torso to him. I didn't think there was any skin left untouched. Youngjae reached out and I winced away, buttoning back up my shirt. 

"I'm sorry, Yon-ah. If I knew he'd do that, I-" I turned away, trying to hide my tears of betrayal. 

"You gave him permission. He said you told him he could." He tried to put a hand on my shoulder, but I, again, moved away from him. 

"I didn't know, Yon-ah. I didn't know what he'd do." I wiped my tears away and made one sharp turn to stare right in his eyes. 

"I hate you. With all my being, Youngjae. I hate you." He leaned forward and smirked at me. 

"You don't know what's good for you. Just like your father." I lunged forward and knocked the chair backward, sending us both flying to the floor. 

I landed a punch square on his jaw and saw the blood my knuckles had left. He seems downright shocked that I had actually swung at him and I got one more punch in before he started fighting back. He tried to get under my legs so that he could ruin the base I had. Before he could snake his foot undermine, I made sure I spread his legs wide enough so he couldn't turn me.

"ing stop!" That was an order. It was the voice I had heeded to so many times, but this time I was determined to mess up his pretty face once and for all. Unlike him, I didn't have to listen to any superiors. I went to punch him again and he caught my fist, twisting it so my shoulder moved up. I tried to move my elbow across his throat but he pushed me up with my fist, hurting my shoulder enough to let go. I lost the advantage and only got a kick into his leg before he had both of my arms pinned above me. 

"I'll kill you." He knew that all he could do was hold me down, so I took the opportunity and my hips to knock him forward. I threw his arms off my wrists so he had to catch himself if he didn't want to fall flap. Then, I grabbed his left arm, pulled it under me, and flipped again. I took the time to elbow him in his nose before he had me flush against his chest, trying to flip me over the top of him so he could escape and stand up. 

"!" He yelled and used his strength to throw me to the side against the nightstand I had pushed out of the way to lunge at him. With that few seconds, he stood up and wiped the blood off of his face. I smiled up at him, happy that I could see the damage I did. 

"How does it feel? Having been injured by the people who hate you the most? I can see the bruises on your neck still." He looked angry this time. He couldn't hide this emotion from anyone. When Youngjae was angry with you, he wasn't going to hold back.

"I hope you know that if this wasn't the South, you would have been dead by now." I stood up and looked down at my hands. I would need new bandages. 

"By who? You? That's laughable." 

"OPEN THE DOOR!" Youngjae smirked and pointed to the phone on the bed. 

"You forgot to hang up. I'm sure he called Jackson." I looked over at the phone and he was right. I had pressed some other button, not knowing how the phone worked, and it was open on another app. 

He had heard everything. 

Youngjae went and opened the door and sure enough, Jackson was there, gun at his side. He didn't expect someone to open the door. Looking at Youngjae's broken nose, he pushed past him and locked eyes with me. Anger. At least, more anger is what I saw in his eyes. I was still breathing heavily and my pupils had to be blown out. 

"HyeIn." Oh, it wasn't anger... it was a disappointment... I think? I held up my hands and shrugged. 

"He was mean to me." He closed his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose. Something he did when he was really, really frustrated. 

"Youngjae, go get cleaned up somewhere else." He locked eyes with me as he left, almost slamming the door behind him. He was, no doubt, fuming on the inside. 

"Did you rip your stitches out again?" I unwrapped my bandages and looked down at the side of my hands. Everything seemed to be intact. It was just my knuckles that were ripped out from punching Youngjae in the face. 

"No." He walked over and put the phone to his ear. 

"Thanks, Mark." He turned the screen to me, pressed the right button to hang up, and put my phone in his pocket. 

"Hey, thats-" He kicked the nightstand hard, probably getting me to shut up. 

"Two days. You get to see Mark in two days. Can you try not to get into any fights before then?" Yes, it was a disappointment. I lowered my head and scratched my arm. 

"Uh, yeah..." 

"I gave Mark the phone to talk to you. Now, you don't deserve it. You can sit here and think about the you keep doing to people." It was soft this time and it almost made me want to cry the amount of guilt that slipped into my chest. 

"What about the they keep doing to me?" He took a deep breath and picked up the noodle boxes, tossing them in the trash. 

"Youngjae... He'll be here in the morning to talk to you. You can't live like this. I'm scared for you because this is exactly how Mark was before he tried to get himself killed on duty."

"I'm not like him." Jackson shook his head. 

"No, you are exactly like he was, HyeIn, and it's going to get you killed."