I walked towards the familiar neighborhood. As I entered the 10-storey building I was hoping and praying that Seung Hyun was home. It was a Saturday anyways, and the chances of him actually just lazing around their house is quite low, but still I took my chance. I turned towards the elevator and pressed 7. 

I leaned against the wall, catching my breath, and wiping the sweat that immediately formed after just minutes of walking. I just got of the hospital anyways, and I was gambling my last reservoir of energy for this. For once the sluggish performance of the elevator was at my advantage, I tried to normalized my breathing and composed myself. When the door opened, I went to their door and knocked twice. There was no answer, I was about to knock again, but then the door opened. 

"OMO! Tae Min?! You scared me there! I thought you were at the hospital." He said curiously, looking at me, completely shock by my presence. 

"Sorry, I got discharged yesterday." 

"What happened anyways? When I called your mom, she was frantically crying." 

I raised my hand, "Later dude." 

"Ne ne, come inside then, I'll go get some drinks." He said, leaving me to go to their kitchen. 

I showed myself in, I already know his place, so I just wen straight to the farthest room on the hallway. I turned the knob, and opened the door. The room looks the same as always, spic and span. Tsk, what a neat freak. 

His bed was made, there was no trace of scattered paper or junk on his compuper table. The cds were neatly organized on top of his stereo. His guitar was resting on his couch. While his window was wide open, over looking the view of the city. I swear his room has one of the best views, no wonder he deeply objected when his sister tried to switched rooms with him. 

"Yo!" He called out. 

I turned to the door, and he was there, holding two cans of beer. "Yo." I walked towards him and grabbed the other can. I opened the lid, and drank two gulps.  

"So what brings you here today?" 

"This." I said, raising the can, and drinking another gulp, the bitter taste of alcohol washing over my system. 

"Omo! So being admitted can also do this to you?" He chuckled, then settled on his couch. While I went to his bed, and leaned against the wall, still holding the beer. 

The awkward silence quickly settled in. It was weird though, since we've never been in this situation before, NEVER. So while he strummed his guitar, I looked outside the window, the view holding me such insterest. I drew some circles on my can, thinking of how can I even start the things I planned to say.

But knowing Seung Hyun's attitude, he never was a big fan of silence, so he broke it first, "What happened anyways?" 

"Coma, I think?" I said nonchalantly. 

"What?! How can that even happen?" He yelled, I can see, how tight he gripped his guitar. 

"Simple, I never woke up."

"Not funny man! How can you even so direct about this? Aren't you even scared that happened?" He asked angrily. I knew why he was mad, I was taking this easily, like I'm not caring what will happen to me. 

"No." I said calmly. 

He didn't answer, I know he was still pissed, so he diverted his emotion into playing his guitar, playing a sick rock tune. I didn't want to talk to him too, I was afraid I'd pissed him more, and we'd turn this day into a bloodbath. But after a while of hearing him play, I knew I couldn't stall any longer. "We're leaving." 

He playing missed a beat, then he eventually stopped. He looked at me, with his eyes questioning, "Why?"

"It's for the best... and it was already planned anyways, you know that." 

He continued playing his guitar, "I know, I just didn't expect you'd be so sure about it, let alone actually do it, after meeting-"

"Yoona." I cut him. "She is the main reason I'm leaving. She deserves someone better, she needs Taecyeon, compared to me, all I can give her is a lifetime of sorrow and tears." I explained, feeling a lump in my throat. I raised the can up, and drank the whole contents. Placing the can on his table, I leaned agains the wall, holding my temple. I closed my eyes. 

"You're giving up already?" 

I shook my head. "I'm helping her to have a better choice in life." 

"How can you be so sure? You've never even talk to her at all." 

"I don't need to.." I said quietly and stood up. I walked towards his window and succumbed to the beauty the view is giving me. "I love her too, I wanted to have her 'til forever, but destiny already made a choice a long time ago, so she needs to be with someone better, she needs Taecyeon." 

"You're wrong-"

"No. This wasn't supposed to be in the plan. Meeting her is an opportunity I'm going to cherish always. I'm thankful God gave her to me, but right now I need to repay that. I need to leave her." 

"You've already decided this, didn't you?"

I nodded. I lounged next to him, and took his beer. I drank the rest of the contents, "Tomorrow, I leave tomorrow." My dizziness started to worsen. I was never a fan of alcohol anyways. 

"Does she know then?" 

I shook my head. 

"At least have the conscience to let her say her farewell to you at peace."

I shrugged my shoulders, and started playing with the can. 

"Just call whenever you need someone to talk to." 

I looked up, and he was giving me a bitter smile. I slapped his back. "Of course." 

I stared at the door. Thinking if I should knock, or at least call her, to know if she was home. I was seriously hesistating, and I could even feel my palms getting sweaty, and my heart started thumping fast. But due to the new confidence I had after drinking two cans of beer, I knocked twice. A very familiar face answered the door. 

Just like Seung Hyun, she was looking at me with surprise written all over her face. But she had a whole different reason to be surprised, I think because she hasn't seen me in almost two months. 

"Is she home?" I asked, breaking the silence. 

"In her room." She said briefly, and asking me to come in. 

"Sleeping?"

She nodded, and went straight to the kitchen, probably, going to fix me something to drink. I went ot the second floor, and I walked on the hallway knowing where to go already. I knocked twice, but there was no answer, I opened the door, and there she was, sleeping on her side. I quietly walked towards the bed, and took a sit on the edge. She still looked peaceful as ever. She was hugging a pillow, and hair was sticking out from her ponytail. On her bedside table, there was a pink book, there was a pen stuck between the pages. Maybe it was her journal, I thought to myself. Wanting fight the urge to read it, I stood up, and went to her study table. There I saw a piece of paper. It was clearly smudged by her tears, and I felt the lump on my throat when I read the one sentence she continuously wrote. "I'm sorry TaeMin, I love you." 

Tears started to form in my eyes, and I heard her stir. My heart raced, thinking that she might have woken up, but as I turned she only changed her position. I sighed. I still wasn't ready how to face her, or even say my goodbye's to her. 

I stood up, and went to her side. I fixed her hair, and pulled her blanket up. 

"So this is the last time I'd see you darling, and I'm a coward for not even facing you, or telling you goodbye." The lumped in my throat was getting worse, and I could feel tears starting to fom in my eyes, "Forgive me darling, for the pain and tears I have caused you. Don't cry for me anymore. Promise me one thing okay? Be happy always." I smiled at her.

I kissed her forehead, I kissed her softly on the cheek, and lastly her lips. "I love you always. Goodbye darling.. my YoonA."