Chapter 35: When You Want Something

‘I shouldn't be in your heart
Either the time we have spent
And I want you to know what the truth is
But sometimes it makes me feel so sick Oh no
I just can't say to you, No I won't..’

Jeongmin plays the chords of the song flawlessly. He closes his eyes, falling into the lyrics of the song. He loves playing music in an open space.

It’s good to see cute couples enjoying his music, parents with their children who always sing along or stare at him with their big, innocent eyes. The elderly always watch him from a distance and give him a treat after, a piece of candy like he’s their little grandchild performing for them.

Music has always made him incredibly happy. Jeongmin is someone that truly believes that music is a thing that can make things better.  The genuine smiling people standing around him for years now, on every Saturday prove his theory over and over again.

‘Yes, we always wish tonight could last forever
I can be your side’

He finishes the song and nods his head in a thank you when the small crowd gathered around him starts clapping. Realizing that a lot more children have come to watch he quickly changes his playing in a bright tune. The children’s eyes lighten up in recognition of the melody.

‘There are three bears in a house,
Father bear, Mommy bear, baby bear’

The children happily song along to the song. When the song ends the parents and children leave. Most couples have already left too thanks to his song choice. Jeongmin lets out a happy sigh and places is guitar next to him on the ground. Just when he wants to take a sip of water someone approaches him. The man is small and is walking straight at him.

‘Lee Jeongmin?’ He asks, Jeongmin nods. Before he wants to ask why the strange man knows his name the other speaks. ‘I have been watching you for a while now. I am the manager of K.Will. I have been watching you for a while now and I would like to scout you as a trainee at Starship Entertainment.’ The man says. Jeongmin’s jaw drops in surprise and confusion. ‘What?’ He asks after a while. The man smiles. ‘Yes. Your songs are nice and your voice seems to impress people a lot. You act like it’s the first time you’ve been scouted.’ The man says, laughing brightly at the boy. Jeongmin can’t smile though. He’s not sure if this man is trying to scout him or just trying to make fun of him.

‘This is my first time.’ He says. The man seems surprised by that. ‘Really?’ He asks. He takes his wallet from his pocket and takes out a business card. Jeongmin takes it, still not sure if he should believe the man in front of him or not. ‘Give me a call if you’re interested. I will plan an audition for you by the time.’ He says. He waits for a few seconds but when Jeongmin doesn’t react he just turns around and walks away, leaving the confused Jeongmin behind him.

~

Kwangmin checks his watch. ‘1 past 12. That should be my bus.’ He whispers to himself when the bus approaches. Just a bit later the bus arrives in time at the bus stop and when Kwangmin gets in he can see Youngmin sitting in the bus. The boy looks up from his phone and smiles.  Kwangmin feels the warmth of Youngmin’s smile through his whole body. He happily skips to his seat and drops down next to Youngmin.

‘Hi.’ Youngmin says, with a slightly awkward smile. Kwangmin quickly hugs Youngmin and he can feel the other leaning into his embrace. ‘I’m looking forward to today.’ Kwangmin says. Youngmin nods. ‘It’s my treat.’ He says. Kwangmin immediately shakes his head. ‘No way. You paid the last time we went out. It’s my turn.’

‘Are you sure? I don’t remember.’ Youngmin says. ‘Because it’s been ages!’ Kwangmin explains, rolling his eyes in frustration. Youngmin blushes slightly. ‘Sorry.’ His voice overflowing with self-pity. Kwangmin laughs and pats his hand slightly. ‘Don’t worry. I’m just glad we’re going out again.’

It’s Kwangmin’s turn to blush when Youngmin grabs his hand. ‘What?’ He asks, amused by the startled expression on Kwangmin’s face.’Kwangmin shakes his head. ‘Nothing…’ Youngmin intertwines their fingers and kisses he back of Kwangmin’s hand. ‘I’ll make up to you for the days we couldn’t be together.’ He says, sounding determined. ‘Why are you so serious, hyung?’ Kwangmin asks. Youngmin’s quick glance at their intertwined fingers aren’t unnoticed. Kwangmin’s eyes light up in understanding. ‘No way!’ He exclaims. He realizes he’s in the bus and quickly lowers the volume of his voice. ‘You’re still feeling bad about rejecting me at school?’ He asks. Youngmin doesn’t say anything. ‘That means yes.’ Kwangmin sighs. He squeezes Youngmin’s hand slightly to make him look at him. ‘I’m not mad about that at all. I never was. I was just a bit disappointed, that’s all.’ He says when their eyes meet. ‘I just thought you really wanted me.’ He says with a smirk. Youngmin laughs and messes up his hair with his free hand. ‘You’re way too cute to make me hard.’ He whispers in Kwangmin’s ear. Kwangmin laughs and playfully punches Youngmin against his chest. ‘Shut up.’

~

Jeongmin walks through the hallway of school. He enters the club room and walks to one of the recording studios. He nods to the girl that’s working on the recording. She smiles at him and gestures towards the headphones on the seat next to her. Jeongmin sits down and puts on the headphones. Hyunseong’s soft and beautiful voice immediately enter his mind. Jeongmin closes his eyes automatically, hearing his boyfriend. It had always been his biggest wish to become an artist. He never thought it would come this soon though. If he auditions and passes he would lose everything. Hyunseong, Kwangmin and Minwoo, a whole part of his high school life. He drops his head down on the desk.

‘Are you okay?’ His fellow club member asks. ‘Kind of.’ Jeongmin mumbles. The girl sighs and pushes the red button in front of her.

‘Hyunseong oppa, come out for a bit.’ She says. Jeongmin sighs heavily and the girl copies him. The door opens and Hyunseong’s footsteps stop right behind Jeongmin. ‘What’s going on?’ Hyunseong asks. ‘I don’t know. I was trying to record a song but then this came in and started to act like an abandoned puppy. I’ll leave now.’ She sounds really mad. That will probably mean that Hyunseong is going to be mad at him too.

‘What’s wrong?’ Hyunseong’s hand is on Jeongmin’s shoulder. Jeongmin can feel the tears welling up in his eyes. Why isn’t he mad? I ruined his recording? Why is the worried about me? The thoughts racing through his head make him dizzy. ‘Are you crying.’ Hyunseong’s voice full of worry snaps him back into character. He quickly wipes his ears on the table and then looks up, straight at Hyunseong, faking with all his might.

‘I’m fine. I just missed you so much today and I couldn’t wait to see you.’ He says with a huge gummy smile. Hyunseong smiles. ‘That’s a relief, I thought something happened. Soohyun sunbaenim is going to kill me for this.’ He realizes. Jeongmin quickly jumps up from his chair. ‘I’ll apologize to her. I don’t want to cause you trouble!’ Jeongmin says. He’s stopped by Hyunseong grabbing him by the wrist.  ‘Don’t you always cause me trouble?’ He asks.

‘When did I?’ Jeongmin yells. He lets out a shriek when Hyunseong pushes him against the wall. ‘Like when you did this when we were at Paran that day.’ Jeongmin swallows his saliva. ‘Did I?’ Hyunseong rolls his eyes. ‘Not really. You even teased me. You said you wanted to show me what ‘faking your innocence’ is about.’

‘I wouldn’t say such cheesy things.’ Jeongmin defends. He gasps for air when Hyunseong forces his lips against Jeongmin’s. He immediately pries Jeongmin’s lips apart with his tongue and pushes it inside of his cavern. Jeongmin moans in the kiss. Hyunseong’s hands quickly but perfectly remove his necktie. His hands fumble with the buttons of Jeongmin’s school uniform. Jeongmin is struggling to keep up with the pace of Hyunseong’s kiss. The older pulls back first, making Jeongmin whine from the sudden loss of contact. A string of saliva still connects their lips. Jeongmin immediately remembers how Hyunseong did the same emberassing action when he himself broke that forced kiss. It had looked adorable and hot at the same time. When he looks at Hyunseong he’s suddenly afraid. He’s afraid of losing what is in front of him.

Jeongmin is surprised when he realizes Hyunseong is putting the buttons on his shirt back in place. ‘Now, tell me why you’re looking at me like that?’  He says, his voice soft and gentle. ‘What are you talking about? I’m not looking…’  Jeongmin stops when he hears the trembling of his own voice. Hyunseong wraps his muscular arms around Jeongmin and pulls him close. Jeongmin sighs in his boyfriend’s embrace.

‘I’ll tell you, but don’t be mad at me alright?’

‘Of course not.’  Hyunseong says, Jeongmin’s hair.

~

Youngmin follows Kwangmin into the seafood restaurant. Before they know it they are sitting behind their own table, drooling as they scan the menu.

‘How about squid?’ Kwangmin asks, sounding like he’s in heaven. Normally Youngmin would be thinking how adorable Kwangmin is but he’s too distracted by the delicious choices of food on the menu in his hands.

‘Can’t we go with shrimps?’ He asks. ‘ No way, we’ll have to peel them and it’ll take longer for us to eat. How about crab?’

‘It looks good, but way too expensive.’  Youngmin answers. Kwangmin lets out a frustrated sigh. ‘Why does food have to be so ing delicious?’ He whines. Youngmin is finally triggered to look up from his menu. He chuckles when he sees Kwangmin, his head laid down on the top part of the couch with the menu on top of his face. He’s startled by Youngmin’s chuckling and puts his head up, as a result the menu drops down on the ground with a loud sound. Some customers look at them shocked. Kwangmin blushes and Youngmin quickly apologizes as Kwangmin drops down on the floor to pick up his menu. He can see the owner smiling at them as she comes near. ‘Is everything alright?’  She asks.

‘Yes!’  Kwangmin exclaims from beneath the table. ‘ We can’t choose what to eat. Everything looks delicious.’ Youngmin explains. Kwangmin is finally back up and sits down. ‘Could you recommend something to us?’ He asks, acting like he did not disturb the peace of the restaurant a few minutes ago. ‘Of course. The shrimps are delicious at  the moment.’  The owner says, pointing at the food Youngmin recommended first. ‘I told you so.’  Youngmin says. Kwangmin pouts. ‘Can’t you just say the squid is delicious too, ahjumma?’  The woman laughs motherly from Kwangmin’s cuteness. ‘The squid is also very good here.’  She says. Kwangmin immediately shows her an adorable gummy smile. ‘Please give us both.’  Youngmin says before Kwangmin can say “I told you so”  to him too. The lady nods. ‘Of course. Could I also get you a drink?’

‘Cola!’ Kwangmin yells happily. ‘Just water for me please.’  Youngmin says. The owner nods and leaves their table.

‘You and your boring water.’  Kwangmin mocks him. ‘You and your sugar cola. Aren’t you hyper enough?’  Youngmin asks jokingly. Kwangmin sticks his tongue out. ‘ No way. I’m going to drink a lot of sugary stuff to get even more energy and I will keep on bouncing around you until you get sick of me.’  He says.

‘You’ll have to drink a lot of cola then.’  Youngmin says. He realizes he said something incredibly cheesy when Kwangmin’s cheeks turn pinkish. In the past he used to be able to say things that would crush all of Kwangmin’s fantasies but these days he know that cheesy compliments (which is pretty much speaking out what he thinks of Kwangmin all the time) results in a better relationship. Just keep this up Jo Youngmin and he will attack you by tonight. He thinks with a smirk.

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YAY! I had a terrible writers block and finished this chapter only now... I started it around 2 weeks ago *hides in the corner of shame*