Chapter 9: Phone Calls

‘Hyung~’ Kwangmin whines as he holds Hyunseong by his arm and shakes him around. ‘Please tell me Youngmin hyung’s number. Please~’

‘No.’

‘Come on! Please….’ Kwangmin rubs his head against his arm. Hyunseong tries to pulls away but fails. Minwoo laughs watching his poor hyung. ‘Just give up hyung. He’s been declining you for a week or so now.’

‘But I haven’t seen him since we met president Sehyuk. The thing with hyungs is over and now I have no good reason to see him anymore. Please just give me his number so I can call him.’

‘Ask him your number yourself.’

‘Then I have to travel all the way to Paran high to just get rejected.’ Kwangmin whines. Hyunseong shrughs. ‘Is there any difference. I won’t give it to you.’

‘Just give it to him hyung.’ Minwoo says with puppy eyes. Hyunseong rolls his eyes and Kwangmin smiles brightly and sends his dongsaeng a wink. Minwoo, satisfied with the gesture of approval decides to press on. ‘They really have to make up so just give Youngmin’s number. Kwangmin hyung and I helped you with your transferring papers so can’t you just pay is back like this?’ He asks. Hyunseong sighs and then shrugs. ‘Alright. I’ll give his number.’

‘Yay! Thanks hyung! Saranghae~’ Kwangmin says happily. Hyunseong shakes his head in disbelief while taking out his phone. ‘You rascals.’

~

It’s Sunday and Youngmin is enjoying his day off. He’s sitting in the big park that only takes a 20 minute walk from the dorms. It’s a walk he often makes to empty his head. He takes a walk and sleeps on the soft, long grass in the park.

Youngmin wakes up from his light sleep when he feels the vibrating of his phone on his thigh. He takes it out and checks the screen. Unknown number. Youngmin shrugs and puts his phone back in his pocket.  Don’t disturb my “once a week” rest salesman.

~

Kwangmin lets out a frustrated sigh when he’s connected to Youngmin’s voicemail. He hangs up and throws his phone on the bed. Why was I even expecting something?

He’s startled when his door is thrown open and Jeongmin rushes inside. The small hyung makes a big jump and lands in a perfect photo shoot like position on Kwangmin’s bed.

‘Hello y. Are you free today?’ He says with a teasing smirk. Kwangmin laughs. ‘I’m always free for you.’ He says. Jeongmin sits up straight. ‘Want to rap a part for me today? I wrote a really simple song on my guitar.’

‘You won’t ask Minwoo?’

‘Nope. I want your voice for this.’ He says with a wink. Kwangmin gets up from behind his desk. ‘Alright then.’

Jeongmin takes Kwangmin’s phone from the bed. ‘Who did you call?’ He asks. He unlocked Kwangmin’s phone before the other realized he did. ‘Youngmin hyung.’ He says.

There’s no need for him to lie to Jeongmin. If there’s anyone he could tell about his worries without being judged it would be to Minwoo and Jeongmin. He’ll probably include Hyunseong in that list soon too.

‘Try it again.’ Jeongmin says. Kwangmin shakes his head. ‘No thank you.’ Jeongmin sighs in frustration and gets up from the bed. He straightens out his arm and hold Kwangmin’s phone right in front of his face. Kwangmin can see Youngmin’s name and number on the screen. Then suddenly Jeongmin pushes the “call” button and the screen switches. ‘That’s how we do it.’ Jeongmin says, satisfied when Kwangmin pulls the phone out of Jeongmin’s hand in a flash and puts it to his ear.

Beep… beep….beep….beep

Kwangmin waits.

Beep…beep…bee- The person you are trying to reach- Kwangmin hangs up. ‘Stupid woman with her stupid voicemail voice.’ Kwangmin says. Jeongmin laughs at his cute pout. ‘He’s probably  busy. Maybe he’ll call you back later.’

‘No way.’ Kwangmin says, dropping his shoulders.

‘You never know.’ Jeongmin says, watching his dongsaeng’s pitiful back view.

~

When Youngmin opens his eyes he immediately closes them again to protect his eyes from the bright sun. He slowly gets up and stretches his arms. That was a good nap. He thinks, satisfied. Let’s now pay attention to the real world. He thinks as he grabs his phone. He checks all the missed kakao messages from the student council. He then realizes he has two missed calls. They are from the same person. Did someone change their number? He thinks. Too lazy to call back, he puts of his phone and gets up to leave the park.

~

It’s already late in the afternoon when Kwangmin returns to his room. The new song Jeongmin wrote had put him in a good mood. It was a feel good like love song. After recording they also started writing a Japanese version of the song. Kwangmin isn’t very good at Japanese so it helps him in his education. He also really likes to rap in Japanese because it gives a whole different feel to a song even when you don’t change the lyrics.

Now that he’s back alone in his room he’s immediately reminded of his failed attempt to call Youngmin. Should I just give it another try? I should! It keeps bothering me if he doesn’t pick up. Hyunseong didn’t give me a false number did he?

Kwangmin smiles at his own thoughts. You idiot. He wouldn’t do that.

~

Youngmin gets his phone when he hears it ring and immediately recognizes the last digits of the number. Let’s find out who has been stalking me for the whole day. He thinks before picking up.

‘This is Youngmin.’

No answer.

Was I talking too fast?

‘This is Youngmin.’ He repeats.

‘Hyung…’ The soft voice on the other side almost results in Youngmin getting a heart attack. His head goes blank and he can feel his heart throbbing in his throat.

‘It’s Kwangmin…’

Like I didn’t know that! How the hell did he get my number?! The question in his head is immediately answered on the other side of the phone.

‘I got your number from Hyunseong hyung. He didn’t want to ask me at first but I just… wanted to talk.’

I’m sorry Kwangmin… I really want us to- ‘There’s nothing to talk about Kwangmin.’ Youngmin says, dismissing his earlier thoughts.

‘Can’t we see each other one more time.’

‘No.’ Youngmin says, picturing Kwangmin’s worried face when they met in the hospital. Remembering him smiling at Minwoo in the café. He was never supposed to see all those expressions. He wasn’t even supposed to ever see Kwangmin’s back.

‘I really wanted to ask this face to face but it seems like you won’t let me….’ Youngmin wants to interrupt but he’s too late. Maybe because he wants to hear Kwangmin’s voice, maybe not.

‘Why are you mad at me? Why can’t we just be how we used to be?’ The rage that Youngmin feels after the first question causes him to not be able to hear the pain in Kwangmin’s voice.

‘WHOSE FAULT DO YOU THINK IT IS?! IT’S YOURS JO KWANGMIN!’ He shouts. The silence on the other side of the line encourages him to let go of more of the pain he held inside for the past few years. ‘I will never forgive you for what you did. I worked so hard because you wanted us to be together. It’s you who started this.’ The tears in his eyes blind his vision. ‘Please stop trying to contact me. Don’t even try to run in to me. You have no right to make me feel guilty towards you.’ He quickly hangs up.

‘I used to love you so much.’ He says, still holding the phone by his ear. The sentence comes out as a choke and he starts crying. The silence in the room is filled by his sobs. Something very deep inside of Youngmin wishes for the phone to ring. For Kwangmin to call again. For Kwangmin to at least try. But he doesn’t.

He always gives up so suddenly. He always leaves me when I need him. Youngmin thinks. His own negative thinking causes him to cry even louder. He wants to dismiss all the thoughts of Kwangmin but it’s not working. He’s too mad. the only thing he can think of right now is Kwangmin and how much he hates him.

That hate for Kwangmin annoys him a lot. If he didn’t have any feelings towards Kwangmin he could just forget and go on. He should quickly let go of all thoughts that have to do with Kwangmin. That’s his final decision of the painful Sunday evening.

~

Kwangmin sits on his bed. His legs folded under him. Why is it my fault? If I call… no! he will definitely not answer me. And if he would, he would probably not answer my question.  

Kwangmin pictures Youngmin’s mad expression for a while and immediately decides that calling is not a good idea.

After thinking much without results he lies down and it doesn’t take long before he falls asleep.

‘Are you sure about this honey?’ Kwangmin sits around the dining table with his parents. He nods. ‘Let Youngmin hyung go to Paran high school. I’ll go to Jiso. I read that it’s just as good as Paran high school so I’m completely fine with it.

‘Thank you Kwangmin. That makes me feel more at ease.’ His father says with an apologetic smile. Kwangmin returns the gesture but his mother still doesn’t look happy.

‘Are you sure about this? Didn’t you say you wanted to go with Youngmin to Paran high school?’ She asks.

‘Well that’s true but what can’t be done can’t be done right? Youngmin hyung is the oldest so I think he should go.’

‘Don’t you want to talk to him about it? Maybe he rather wants to go with you to Jiso high school?’

‘No! I don’t want to drag him along. He always does what I want him to do and I feel really bad for him. Don’t tell him that it’s because of money. I’ll tell him later.’ Kwangmin reassures them. Their parents are quiet for a while but then seem to agree at the same time.

‘Alright then. You can tell him when you’re ready.’

~

The next day Kwangmin wakes up with a shocked expression.  It can’t be… he thinks before taking his phone. It’s still pretty early.

When he’s done with all the things a high school student does in the morning he leaves the dorm. The moment he breathes in the fresh air and runs down the stairs he is facing Donghyun and Minwoo.

‘Good morning.’ He says, giving Donghyun a suspicious look. Then his eyes swift to Minwoo.

‘Good morning hyung!’ Kwangmin decides he doesn’t want to know what the reason for proud look on Minwoo’s face is.

‘Were you able to contact Youngmin hyung yesterday?’ Minwoo asks. Kwangmin’s expression immediately changes completely and Minwoo immediately feels bad for asking.

‘Yes but he doesn’t want to make up with me.’

‘What?!’ Donghyun asks. ‘Listen Kwangmin. You have to make up with him. He probably just got mad because he’s having a hard time.’ Donghyun says. Kwangmin can feel a scary thought creeping inside of his mind. ‘What do you mean?’ He asks.

‘Youngmin… he…’ Donghyun lets out a desperate sigh. ‘Do you remember when you met Youngmin at the hospital?’ Kwangmin nods.

‘Did he tell you what happened?’

Kwangmin shakes his head. ‘I did ask but he didn’t answer.’  He explains. Donghyun sighs again. ‘That’s what I thought. Kwangmin… I’m saying this not because I want to but those bruises aren’t just from Youngmin’s own mistakes. The student council members kind of…’

‘Kind of what?’ Kwangmin asks. He can feel the organs in his stomach twist. ‘They beat him up.’ Donghyun says.

‘What?! WHY?!’ Kwangmin asks in total shock. There’s nothing he can even think of that Youngmin could do to get beaten for.

‘No reason. They just find it fun.’ Donghyun says. Kwangmin feels how his body gets hot from rage and he wants to throw up from disgust remembering the bruises on Youngmin’s body.

Kwangmin turns around and immediately takes out his phone and dials the number that he thought he would never even look at only one night ago.

As expected, he’s connected to the voicemail.

__________________________________________

I knew I said I wouldn't talk about the twins past but I did...

Thank you for reading *90 degree bow*