That was weird. Kyungsoo would never choose to accompany anyone else above me. I have always been his priority, even if he knows the feelings he has for me will never be reciprocated.

And was that...... a girl? Wait..... is Kyungsoo.....

Jinri was fidgeting beside me. I held her hand tighter.

"Don't worry, Taemin's not really as strict as he appears to be on TV. He just has this resisting face, but he still behaves closer to his age."

"It's not that." Jinri replies. "That girl's bag...... I feel like I've seen it somewhere....."

How she could've noticed her bag, I will never know. Women and their keen eyes. 

The lady who assisted approached us and bowed.

"Mr. Jongin, Mr. Lee says you may now enter."

Jinri looks at me warily, and in return I gave her a slight smile. When we entered, Taemin looked like he was out of breath.

"Dude? You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah. I'm good. I just didn't know you were coming."

"Yeah well, I invited Jinri for dinner tonight." I pushed her slightly towards Taemin.

They both bowed to each other and shook hands.

"So you're the famous Choi Jinri. I've been hearing a lot about you."

I glared at Taemin but he didn't seem to notice. Whenever we talk about my supposed fiancee, nothing comes out of my mouth except vile, hateful comments. That wasn't changing anytime soon, but if I want to commit to this, I have to act professional. And Taemin isn't helping with his snarky remarks.

Jinri giggled a little and bowed at him.

"Already talking about me even before meeting me? That's kinda romantic Jongin." she says playfully.

Taemin stifles a laugh and I tried my hardest not to hit him.

"Anyway, I didn't know you had guests. Too bad I wasn't introduced, she seemed to have had a stomach ache." I told Taemin, emphasizing on the she.

It's been a while since Taemin had actually had the time to meet women. He's too busy meeting with world leaders in different countries.

And it's not like he has forgotten her either.

I furrowed my brows. Somehow, she always enters my mind rudely without any warning. And thinking about her makes me anxious.

I shook the thoughts out of my head and bid goodbye to Taemin, then proceeded to another private room for mine and Jinri's date.

One dinner date became 3, then 5, then suddenly we found ourselves going to other places as well. Everything always had to be so lavish, like a rooftop revolving restaurant, or a vintage dress auction, or a private beach resort with only 7 people. Sometimes she takes me to baseball games as well, and to flower farms where she teaches gardeners how to grow flowers according to season. 

But no matter how many dates we accumulate, I felt blank. Like there was no connection whatsoever. I thought if I kept going to these dates, if I kept seeing her and meeting up with her in between my busy schedule, I'd have to somehow develop something more in this stone heart I have.

But there was none. And it frustrated me, for a whole lot of reasons. Because I think no one will have the power to soften my heart anymore.

Except for one.

I banged my head on the table. I was already dizzy having my 6th bottle of soju. I was tired of all of this. Being prominent. Trying my best to at least like someone, because the loving can come later. Trying to convince myself that I have my together because I am the president's brother. I was already dead. And this is worse than death. 

Kyungsoo sighs behind me and I looked at him in worry.

"Sorry for dragging you all the way here, Soo. I just need someone to vent on."

"You say that, but all you do is down shots simultaneously. Venting means speaking Jongin, and I haven't heard another word from you from the moment I arrived at this bar till now. Can you please, please tell me what's wrong. Let me help you." he replies.

I couldn't speak. I hate to admit to my feelings. I hate to look so weak. But hell, what do I look like right now, with what I'm doing.

"I just don't think I'm ready for all of this you know? I can't find a connection with Jinri."

"Then, I don't know, call off the wedding?" Kyungsoo says sarcastically. I resist from hitting him in the head.

"Like I can do that. I tried to understand this whole thing, for the 3 years I've been back in that 's house. After all, business is business. We never forget our family. We always choose our family."

"You hate your father."

"Hating him doesn't mean I hate my brother too, Soo. I'm doing all of this for Taemin. I know how much pressure he's been put on too. I can't let him go through all that alone."

Kyungsoo doesn't say a word. I looked over at him and he seems sullen.

"You're really nice you know that? Underneath all this...... hatred, this shadow. You have a good heart. I guess..... she was right all along."

I chuckled. I already know who he's talking about.

"Yeah. Maybe she is." and I couldn't agree more.

~

Today I just gave the most nervewracking meeting I have to do in my life. I'm still not used to all of this, running our business and doing meetings, but it's my duty. So if I have to do well, I have to do the ing best I can.

I loosened my tie while on the way to the car. Anyone who dares give me a headache right at this moment will get smacked in the face, and I mean it.

Just as I was about to enter the vehicle, I heard my name being called in the highest pitch ever, and it hurt my head and my ears.

I really mean what I said. I'll smack if I have to.

I turned around and expected Wendy or another stupid secretary but came face to face with Jinri instead, smiling from ear to ear.

"You look so tired, work was hard?" she asked sulkingly as she fixes my collar and arranges my hair into perfect place.

"Yeah. I could use a nap." I said.

"Well then how about I come to your place and cook for you? And you just lay down and rest?" she replied enthusiastically.

I saw the sparks in her eyes and knew it would be rude of me to decline her. Yes, shocking. Kim Jongin, a man who doesn't care about others, worrying he might hurt someone's feelings 

I had no choice but to say yes, and within minutes, we were back home.

Taemin was in an overseas visit, and the was probably out golfing with his stupid friends.

I was surprised at how easily Jinri became friends with our maids. They looked so fond of her, and I smiled a little. Jinri really has that charm.

The maids insisted to help her, but she shooed them all away.

"You should rest! It's always been you taking care of my Jongin, but now I think I should do it."

I blushed a little at her remark, but regained my composure. What a little confident idiot.

She tried making me some soup, but when I tasted, it was bland.

"It just needs seasonings maybe?" I tried to cheer her up.

Then she burned the rice she was cooking, which resulted to an almost fire in our kitchen.

She also tried frying a fish, but ended up chickening out of it the moment she dropped the fish in hot oil.

In the end, even if I got a piercing headache, I was the one that cooked everything.

I sighed. So much for a well deserved rest.

As we were about to start eating, I noticed her silence. Her head was bowed down I can't even see her face anymore.

"Hey....." I said. That's when I saw her stifling. And then I saw teardrops falling down her eyes.

At that moment I felt like the biggest . It's always gonna be a different story if I see a girl crying. It's always gonna be automatic that I'm at fault.

"Jinri, I didn't know what I did, but I'm sorry....." I said, scooting closer to her and rubbing her back.

She looked at me in her tear stained eyes, managing a laugh.

"No silly. It wasn't because you did something bad. I just..... I feel so ashamed that I can't even do stuff like this on my own. How am I ever gonna be prepared to be your wife now? I'm worthless."

Bold of you to assume I'd pick you as a wife, I want to say out loud. I shut my mouth to avoid further conflict and focused on the matter onhand.

"Jinri," I said as I grabbed both of her hands. She looks at me in shock. "You don't have to know all of these things right away. And even if this isn't exactly your forte, I'm sure you're amazing at the other things you do. I mean, I've seen you taking care of beautiful gardens. Don't disregard that just because you're not that good in cooking. It will take time, but it will always be worth it in the end."

She wipes her tears and suddenly, her bright smile is back again.

"You have a way with words, Mr. Kim. I guess that makes you even more likeable. Speaking of flowers, let me give you something."

She reaches into her bag and pulls out a small resealable plastic bag. Inside it contained what looked like nuts? Seeds?

"Here, I got you some seeds for the orange hydrangeas. I saw how adored you were with them, so it would be nice to grow your own garden. And it would also be nice imagining you and I, side by side as we take care of our plants."

Again, I resisted myself into making a weird face. But I was happy with the seeds. I could use some color in our boring house. I didn't know anything firsthand about taking care of this, but I could always ask Jinri I guess.

"Thank you for these, where did you get them? I thought they were rare?"

"Oh, Jung asked her sister to bring her some back from San Diego. That's where we usually get our seeds, her sister. She just happens to really know what to do to take care of these so they grew and grew in number."

"I thought you grew the garden at your hotel?"

"Well, I semi did, but that was all her. She knows what to do to grow these flowers beautifully. Like a flower whisperer. I tried, even some of my staff too, but nobody did it best except her. Hey, maybe I should bring you to my flower shop! So I can introduce you to her too. Maybe she can help you with these flowers as well."

Now I'm even more curious of this girl. That's impossible, how can only one person manage to grow a certain type of flower?

I just nodded in agreement as we proceeded with our dinner. I got to know a little more about Jinri that night, something we never usually talk about whenever we got out to our dates. 

Knowing more about her made me realize that I let my judgement get the best of me. Maybe I underestimated her too much. All it took was a moment like this to make me realize that maybe, just maybe, I can be able to open my heart again. Slowly, but surely.