Chapter 23: A day passing by 

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       I stayed in his arms; I felt cradled like a baby. His arms wrapped around me as if he was afraid to let go. He and I were silent. I didn't dare look into his eyes, I would only fall harder. I had a list of things to do today and this wasn't one of them. 

      The sun was out and it was a beautiful day. The birds were chirping and there was not a cloud in the sky. It gave me more of a reason to be sad. It wasn't like this when it happened; it was raining-hard. Lightening and thunder, streets flooded with puddles of water. It was a nightmare in reality. My eyes filled with the vivid image, the scarred memory replaying itself. It was only this day where things would hit me hard. 

       I told myself I'd visit him. 'That was the whole point of coming to Korea.' It was a coincidence that I'm straddled in Kwangmin's arms- 'I'm still in his arms...' I push myself off of him, avoiding eye contact. I remember that one talk we had, he told me he'd accompany me to my father's... I averted my gaze towards him, locking eyes with him and he opened his mouth to speak,

"Are you alright?"

        I remembered the shatter of the glass, breaking from the car windows. The force applied on the breaks, creating a loud screeching noise. The blood- the blood is red and fresh as it oozed out of several places. The car breathed death and the air filled with the smell of blood. 'How could I forget this scene?' It was the day I lost him.

      I blinked several times breaking our eye contact looking at a squirrel that was climbing a tree."I'm.. I'm perfectly fine," I say in a firm tone, although deep inside I'm hurting. I turn my attention back to him, "I have one request, can you come with me somewhere?" I sheepishly ask, scratching my left hand against my neck. 

He was silent.

My face fell into a pout and I took his silence as a no, "Nevermind, I understand if you're busy I-" 

     He interrupted me and his voice filled in, "Where would you like to go first?" The ends of his lips curved upwards; he smiled at me. It was a genuine smile. It was a smile that I didn't see often. 

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We walked side by side to a near by flower shop. I needed to bring something for my father, it would be impolite to visit empy handed. It's a present for not visiting in so long.

     I pushed the front door open letting the little chimes above the door jingle indicating that there are customers. The aroma of fresh flowers were everywhere, flowers of all sorts were assorted by color to size to name; from left to right, there was no escaped from seeing flowers. To be honest I'm not a big fan of flowers because flowers are bound to die anyway. Maybe that's why I'm not too interested in them. Flowers resemble humans, we only live to such an extent that our life can end fast than you can say death. But the difference between a flower and a human is flowers are more free than humans, and each flower represented something- like a rose symbolized love. 'Some like that.'

    I looked around the shop, I was certainly no flower expert and there was way too many flowers to choose from. I saw Kwangmin observe every passing flower, he'd even sniff some. "You seem to be enjoying the presence of the flowers," I tell him. I smiled at his foolishness. He tucked a flower in my hair and I couldn't help but smile. 

    He merely laughed and we continued our walk around the shop, "My girlfriend loved flowers. She could name almost    every flower and being here makes me feel connected to her," he confesses to me. 

I nod my head in understanding. 'He has a girlfriend Kyungmi, snap out of it.' I looked over at a couple of flowers trying to occupy myself, "What's her name?" I ask.

"Her name was JaeMin, Jae for short." He replied. He pulled out a flower and handed it to me. It was blue and the petals were nicely bloomed. I wasn't to sure of the name of the flower but it was pretty. 

"You remind me of these," He says.

     'I'm sure dad would like these.' I took the flower to the front counter where a middle-aged lady greeted me, "Can I have a bouquet of these please?" I ask her handing the flower to her. She nodded her head and headed to the back only to bring a few other sorts of wild flowers. She laid the bunch of flowers on a decorated paper and she started playing with the colors and matching it around with one another.

 "Your boyfriend seems very interested in flowers," The lady says trying to break the ice

I wave both my hands, "He's not my bo-"

"Boyfriend? Yeah I've heard that all before," She chuckled, "but you guys would make a cute couple... In my opinion." She finally wrapped up the lovley bouquet. It didn't just consist of the one blue flower but a mix of all sorts. I bit my bottom lip. 'This will probably cost a lot.' 

"This is beautiful," I said admiring her work of art. "How much will it cost?"

The ends of her lips curved into a crescent shape and her eyes smiling, "It's free." She shooed Kwangmin and I out. 

"Thank you so much!!" I bow to her before I take my leave with Kwangmin. The bouquet was beautiful and absolutely breath taking, the pop of color that contrasted with one another was really something. 

"That's a beautiful bouquet you have there," I hear Kwangmin say as we walk to ther nearest bus stop.

I smiled, "A beautiful bouquet from a kind lady." I said, holding the bouquet up to my face, still awed by the effort she put in. 

"A beautiful bouquet for a beautiful girl," Kwangmin said in a in soft, hushed voice.

      "Did you say something?" I questioned not being able to hear the last sentence he just said. I look at him and he shakes his head. He averted his gaze elsewhere pointing at the bus coming towards us. Together we boarded the bus taking a seat at the back, "It's going to be a long bus ride."

"I'm not complaining, I like long bus rides." He replies looking out the window.

"Why?"

He looks at me, eyes wide and his plumped, pink lips ready to speak, "It gives you time to think and sort out all your thoughts."

I wiggle my eye brows at him, "Think? Tell me what do you think about?" I cross my arms and a smirk formed his face.

"Now that's a secret for me and my thoughts," He said.

I looked away and pouted, "Hmph.."

     I felt his finger push my cheeks up, forcing a smile on my face, "Don't pout, it makes you look cuter." After saying that he removes his fingers from my face and faces forward.

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     My father's grave was far off from the city but it wasn't too close to the country side either. I asked my grandmother for the address because I haven't been there since the burial. I look at Kwangmin who was looking out the window admiring the scenery. We took the same road as the time we went to Donghyun's beach house. The view of the ocean struck casting a bright blue path, that's what caught my attention.

Kwangmin took a glance at me and noticed that I was wearing the necklace he gave me, "You're wearing it?" 

     I took my focus off the window, "Hm?" I touched the piece of jewelry that was around my neck, "Oh.. of course.. it's gorgeous, thank you." I tell him. I hadn't had the chance to tell him after he gave it to me, it feels good to finally get that off my chest.

     We finally reached our stop and we get off the bus. We enter the gates and a path guides our way to the graveyard. 'Just like how I remember it.' Stones carved with loved ones' names and I scan for my father's. I clutch on to the bouquet of flowers and my hands are becoming more and more clammy and shaky. I stop my walking when I see his name. His grave was clean and flowers (slightly dead) rested on the top of the grave. I kneel in front of his grave and place the fresh bouquet down by where his name was carved. "Daddy," I sniffled trying to hold back the tears, "I'm sorry I didn't visit you... I would've been here soon but I was afraid but I'm here now!" I wipe away the tears that have fallen from my eyes. 

        Hesitantly Kwangmin reached my height and wrapped an arm around me; trying to comfort me, "It's okay to cry." He whispered to me. He looked at the grave and cleared his throat before speaking, "Hi Mr. Choi. I'm Kyungmi's friend, it's nice to meet you sir. Kyungmi's in great hands so you don't have to worry about anything. She brave, independent and beautiful. I'm sure you're proud of the many things she's accomplished. Thanks for raising a girl like Kyungmi, I'm glad that she's in my life. Oh... And sir? If you've seen a girl named Jae up there can you tell her I miss her.. a lot?"

      I was curled up against Kwangmin's chest. I was so touched to his words. 'No words can explain how much this meant to me Jo Kwangmin.. thank you.' I looked up at Kwangmin and he smiled at me. This smile was quite different than the other recent smiles I've seen today. It was a more playful and youthful smile, "Done crying?" He asks wiping my tears away. 

"Crying's for babies,"

He chuckled and pulls me into a hug. "Kwangmin?" I question with my head still against his chest, "I'm sorry about Jae.." 

      He lifts my chin up, making me meet eyes with him. He scans my face and stopped at my lips. Slowly he leaned in, "Don't be sorry..." He closed his eyes and leaned in even further. The next thing I knew his lips touched mine. 

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