Description:
I want to be alone, but not lonely. The distance is killing me, but proximity scares me.

Foreword:
"Come home quickly. I've missed you, Ji."

Seunghyun is lying on the couch with his hands behind his head. The TV is on, but he's not watching. The volume was audible, but he hears nothing. He should be sleeping, but he is far from sleepy. He thought of filling his system up with wine and get drunk, but changed his mind. He wants to be sober. He wants to feel this. He wants to feel and remember the emptiness.

He stares blankly at the ceiling, letting his eyes wander to every nook and line, making out shapes created by the dimmed lights. But not for long. Because it reminds him of a certain someone. It reminds him of how they would lay side by side in the living room, tipsy after a few bottles of wine, and compete who would come up with the weirdest shape. Whoever wins gets to have breakfast in bed the next morning.

Seunghyun sits up and rubbed his face. He glanced at the TV. The cheerful host and the sound of the audience laughing annoy him a little. He feels like they are mocking him and laughing at him. He reached out for the remote and changed the channel. Another talk show, he changed it again.  A variety show. He paused. This is that someone's favorite show. Sudden flashes of wide grins and laughter flooded his mind. Sometimes out loud, and sometimes muffled by the back of a hand.

He changed the channel again. Cartoon. Also not helping. The square yellow character reminds him of that someone even more. So he flicked the power button on the remote and switched the TV off.

Seunghyun gets up from the couch and treads towards the fridge in the kitchen. He paused for a while, looking at the silly pictures stuck on the door. A smile curved on his lips remembering where and when the pictures were taken. Seunghyun took out a bottle of water and drank straight from it. A familiar voice nags in his head for not using a glass. He almost emptied the bottle, yet he put the bottle back into the fridge. The same voice nags in his head again for neglecting to refill the bottle before putting it back into the cooler. Although he has been scolded so many times, Seunghyun still does it just to get scolded again and again.

Seunghyun is going crazy. Everything he does, everywhere he looks, remind him of that someone, that person. He can’t stand being away, but he’s afraid of staying too close, too much. He’s afraid that he would become too predictable and the one he loves will get tired of him or get bored of his antics. He would rather suffer like this than having that someone loses interest in him. ‘Distance makes the heart grows fonder’; that’s his motto, his belief.

He is not sleepy but Seunghyun decided to call it a night so he retreats to his bedroom. As soon as he walks in, he was overwhelmed by a scent so strong that it feels like the owner was in the room. It’s too much that Seunghyun almost return to the couch and just sleep there. He approaches the bed that seems a little oversized without the other person, and throws himself onto the fluffy mattress. He turns towards the other side of the bed and hated the fact that it’s empty. And he hates it even more knowing that he will be waking up alone tomorrow morning. No nose and chin nuzzling at the crook of his neck. No hair poking and tickling his chest. No kisses on the eyelids to wake him up.

Letting out a sigh for the nth time tonight, he searches for his phone on the side table and quickly taps the shortcut to call the one person that has been messing with his sanity.

"Hey.." Seunghyun could feel all the tense in his muscles melt as soon as he hears the voice from the other end. The ache that has been tugging his heart strings since the beginning of the day blooms into a comforting warmth spreading from the center of his heart.

"Took you long enough." The other responded with a chuckle. Seunghyun could literally hear the smile.

"I'm sorry.." Seunghyun pulls a pillow and hugs the bedding item, substituting for the absence. He inhales the scent lingering on the pillow case.

"Silly.." The other man mumbled between soft chuckles, which made Seunghyun curls on his side. He closes his eyes and greeted by an image of a bright smile, studded with perfect teeth. If the pillow in Seunghyun's pitiful embrace was alive, it would be declared dead by now with strangulation as the cause of death.

Seunghyun draws a deep breath to suppress his frustration. "When are you coming back?"

“Friday.”

“Friday? That long?” Seunghyun whines.

“Don’t be a baby. Tomorrow is already Thursday.” Seunghyun heard a sniffle at the end of the sentence and he abruptly sits up.

"Hey are you okay? Did you catch a cold?"

"I'm fine. The weather is just a bit nippy. Don't worry." The man on the other end of the line sniffled again. "Why are you not sleeping?"

Seunghyun glanced at the clock on his wall; almost midnight. "I'm not sleepy." He rubbed his face and ironically let out a big yawn.

"Yeah, right. Go to bed, Seunghyun." The other man laughed. "Good night."

"Come home quickly." Seunghyun is now struggling to keep his eyes open. "I've missed you, Ji."

"I know. Sleep tight. Dream of me."

"Always."

==========

Our Tabi loves being alone, but I know no one wants to be lonely. And I bet he can only keep his distance for so long until he misses the company. As a fellow Scorpio (Nov 1), I understand the mysterious traits. We tend to isolate ourselves from the crowd and social attention and we are content that way. Yet we have so much love to offer and share. And we are also a loyal partner that anyone could ask for. We would give everything, under one condition; don't ever betray us. Once we lose our trust in you, we will never even look at  you the same way again.

Hope you enjoy this chapter as well. Let me know. :)

P/S: This chapter is also inspired by a comment from one of my readers. Thanks for the inspiration, Verine. :)