(FLASHBACK)

YEAR 2010

Tiffany’s POV

I was in the waiting area of my company, waiting for my manager to pick me up. I waited and waited but my manger still hasn’t arrived yet. Bored, I the flat screen TV placed in the room.

    I cringed when it was WGM playing on the screen. I wanted to change the channel but my body froze when I watched Nichkhun and Victoria together. This was my first time watching Nichkhun’s episode on WGM. My eyes stung and started to water.

    I fell back on the couch and my eyes stared at the two people staring at each other lovingly. I felt my chest tighten and a piercing pain was stabbing my heart. I placed my hand on my chest and clenched it tight as if I could just rip the pain right out.

    Don’t worry, it’s all an act, that was what he said to me a few weeks after being married.

    That was also the last thing I heard from him. Now it has been almost five months. I stared at the couple on the screen. Nichkhun was smiling and laughing as he teased Victoria. He was flustered when Victoria smiled at him. His eyes never left her.

    “He looks different.” I murmured softly. I had never seen him like that—even with me. He was a complete different person than the Nichkhun I know. Was it because of Victoria?

    I felt something rolling down my cheeks. I placed my fingers on my face and felt something wet. I laughed. Am I crying? Why am I crying? I shouldn’t be crying. I continued staring at the TV screen. Nichkhun was holding her, carrying her in his arms. I laughed again as the tears streamed faster down my face. It’s just an act. He told me it’s all an act. I started to sob.

    Who was I kidding? We haven’t seen each other for a long time and deep down, I had always known that he was drifting further away from me. My eyes were still locked on the TV screen. I wanted so much to believe that this is all just a lie, an act. That the words he said to her were actually meant for me. But I knew that I was the one who was lying. I was lying to myself all this time. Pretending that things will go back to normal, that Nichkhun would come back by my side.

    The tears were streaming down like waterfalls and I didn’t bother to wipe them away. I didn’t know why I was torturing myself by still staring at the screen. By the way he looks at her, the way he speaks to her, the way he laughs with her, the way he touches her… No matter how great an actor he is, I know he can’t fake what I was seeing right now.

    He’s in love with her.

    “Why are you watching this?” I heard someone giggled behind me. “It’s embarrassing.” I quickly rubbed my eyes with the sleeves of my blouse and turned around with a smile on my face. My face suddenly hardened.

    “V-Victoria Unnie…” I stuttered a bit. My eyes suddenly stung again when I saw the woman who was replacing me in Nichkhun’s heart. I shook my head and let out a laugh. I quickly turned back towards the TV screen. “You two look good together.” I said with a laugh, hiding the crack in my voice.

    “You think so?” Victoria asked bleakly. I turned back to look at her. Her brows were knitted together as she played with a keychain on her phone. She looked sort of upset with my compliment. Don’t tell me? Does she not have feelings for him? “Hey, you want to grab a coffee with me?” She suddenly asked. I shook my head from my thoughts and nodded.

    We walked together out of the company and went to a secluded café nearby. It was the same café me and Nichkhun used to have our dates at. The last time I saw him was at this café as well. I swallowed back the sobs rising and smiled at Victoria as she opened the door for me.

    “We ran into each other at this café, remember?” Victoria said as we ordered our coffee at the counter. I looked at her and smiled weakly. I remembered that day. I almost laughed when I thought about it. I was so scared that she might see me and Nichkhun together but who knew that they both would end up with each other. “Let’s seat over here.” She pulled me towards a small coffee table and pulled out a chair for me.

    I was hesitant at first. Out of all the tables placed in the café, why did she choose to seat at me and Nichkhun’s usual spot? I took a seat and Victoria sat opposite of me—in Nichkhun’s chair. I stared at Victoria. It felt like only yesterday Nichkhun was sitting there, smiling and laughing with me. Victoria took a sip of her coffee and looked up at me.

    “I saw you, you know.” She suddenly said with a small smile. I looked at her quizzically. “That day we saw each other here, I saw you with… someone?” She smiled teasingly. So she saw me and Nichkhun that day but I don’t think she knows it was him or she would’ve said something. “So… is he a boyfriend?” She asked.

    “Was…” I sighed and took a sip of my ice coffee. I used both my hands to hold the cup as my fingers were trembling. Victoria bit her lower lip and looked at me apologetically.

    “Oh, I’m sorry. Was it recent?” She asked. I only sighed.

    “We didn’t break up or anything… I still love him.” I took another sip of my drink and stared off into space. “I think the feeling is no longer mutual.” Victoria set down her cup and leaned forward to rub my shoulders comfortingly. I smiled at her.

    “What happened? You can talk to me.” She said softly, giving me a reassuring smile. I should hate her right now but oddly I felt safe. The sobs were just on the tip of my tongue as I looked at this caring woman in front of me.

    “Nichkhun… do you like him?” I suddenly asked, looking down on my drink. Victoria was confused but before she could say anything I cut her off. “Do you really like him?” I looked up at her and dared myself to look into her eyes. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop myself from crying.

    She was dazed at first. She was deep into her thoughts as she thought about it, her face was tensed. Maybe she doesn’t like him? It doesn’t look like she does. I froze when I saw her eyes softened and a small smile was curving on her lips. She looked back at me and I could almost hear her voice shouting the answer in my brain.

    “I—”

    “I’m sorry.” I burst into tears before Victoria could answer. I didn’t want to know her answer. “I’m sorry.” I sobbed again.

Victoria’s POV

“Hey, you want to grab a coffee with me?” I asked Tiffany. She looked and sounded upset when I met her just now. Even her face was sickly pale. I thought getting something sweet in her system would calm her down. She nodded and I smiled at her.

    I took her to this small café I love going to. It was in a secluded area so I could buy coffee and relax without worrying any fans or reporters stalking me. It also has a nice ambience to it so it would be the great place for Tiffany to relax herself.

    We ordered our drinks and I suddenly remembered I once ran into her here once. Tiffany was unusually quiet and I started to get worried as we took a seat on a small table nearby. She suddenly looked more stressed than before. I racked my brain for something to talk about. Ah! I snapped my fingers mentally in my head.

    “I saw you, you know.” I said with a small smile playing on my lips. “That day we saw each other here, I saw you with… someone?” I smiled teasingly at her. It was just an ordinary day and I decided to buy some snacks for my members. I saw Tiffany and a guy being very intimate with each other when I walked in the café. I wanted to say hi to them but decided not to interrupt their date. I giggled mentally in my head. I clearly remembered her face then; happy and in love. “So… is he a boyfriend?” I asked, attempting to start a conversation.

    “Was…” She sighed and I could see tears forming in her eyes. I suddenly felt awful. Stupid! Now look what I’ve done.   

    “Oh, I’m sorry. Was it recent?” I asked. Maybe that’s why she was so down today.

    “We didn’t break up or anything… I still love him.” I could hear the tiny cracks in her voice. “I think the feeling is no longer mutual.” I suddenly felt an ache in my heart. I hated seeing her like this. I leaned forward and rubbed her shoulders comfortingly. She deserves so much more than a heart-ache. I was now seething with anger at the guy who broke her heart.

    “What happened? You can talk to me.” I said softly. I wanted to help her, to protect her. I could see her hands trembling.

    “Nichkhun… do you like him?” She suddenly asked, avoiding looking into my eyes. I was taken aback for a moment. I tried to process her words but before I could say anything, she continued. “Do you really like him?” Why was she asking this? I looked at her confusingly but from the way her eyes were looking directly into mine, she wanted a clear answer from me.

    I thought about it. This wasn’t the first time anyone asked me this. Yeah I like Nichkhun. I mean I spent almost five months with the guy but do I really like him? I didn’t know to be honest. I felt happy when I’m with him but it’s just a show. It’s not real. Is it? Ugh, this sort of feeling is what’s been keeping me annoyed all the time.

    A picture of him popped into my mind. I smiled to myself. He’s sweet, caring, better in anything he does, a bit cheesy, a terrible liar, at doing events and… I think I know what my answer is. A small smiled spread on my lips.

    “I—”

    “I’m sorry.” I froze when Tiffany suddenly burst into tears when I was about to answer her question. “I’m sorry.” She sobbed again. I quickly pulled my chair next to her and rubbed her back. She started to cry even harder now.

    “Hey, hey… Are you okay? Tiffany?” I tucked strands of her hair back and tilted her chin up so I could face her. I wiped the tears with my thumb and hushed her softly. “Stop crying. I’m here, I’m here.”

    “Unnie… I-I-I’m really sorry…” She stuttered and continued sobbing.

    “Why? Why are you sorry?” I asked her but she kept on crying. I felt my eyes stung as well as I watched Tiffany’s horrible state. Was this all because of the breakup? “Hey, are you upset about the breakup with the guy? Is that it?” I asked, wanting to let her pour out all the pain she’s holding in. She sobbed louder and I was really glad that we were the only ones in the café right now.

    “The guy… the guy is Nichkhun.” She wailed and started sobbing again. I froze in my seat in shock. Tiffany looked at me guiltily with the tears running down her cheeks.

    “What do you mean?” I laughed shakily.

    “The whole reason Nichkhun agreed on doing WGM was because of me. Our company found out about our relationship and rumours were already spreading in the media so the company thought the rumours would disappear if he entered WGM with another girl. I’m really sorry Unnie but I don’t want to lose him…” She managed to say it all between sobs. I continued rubbing her back gently.

    So… Nichkhun and Tiffany… 

    I felt a slight sting in my chest but I ignored it. I can’t let Tiffany be this way anymore. It hurts me more to see her like this and I would do anything to make it all better again. I pulled her in my arms and hushed her again, her hair.

    “Shhh…shhh… It’s okay, I understand.” I comforted her. Slowly she stopped sobbing but the tears still kept flowing. All this time I was having a great time with Nichkhun while Tiffany had to suffer seeing her boyfriend spending time with someone else. I can’t imagine how hurt she was. Slowly I pushed her back a bit in my arms so I could see her face. “Listen to me, everything will be okay. Don’t worry, alright? Trust me.” I smiled at her and slowly she smiled back. She pulled me into her arms and held me tight.

    “Just please don’t fall in love with him… please. I don’t want to lose him.” I her hair again.

    “I won’t.” I promised. I felt a tugged on my heart when I finally know that everything Nichkhun ever did for me was just an act. I should be boiling with anger at him, but I wasn’t because he wasn’t mine to begin with. It must be hard for both of them to be kept apart like this. And Nichkhun must be suffering inside since he’s forced to act like he’s in love with me but he willed himself to do so just to protect Tiffany.

     He must really love her.

Knock… knock…

    “Come in.” I heard Sajangnim’s voice on the other side and slowly opened the door. “Ah, Victoria. You wanted to see me?” He asked as he beamed a smile at me. I walked into his office and bowed.

    “I hope I’m not disturbing you or anything.” I apologized.

    “No, no, not at all. Please, have a seat.” He gestured me to sit on one of the leather couches in the middle of his office. I took a seat in front of him. “So I heard you’re quite popular these days.” He chuckled.

    “Yeah.” I agreed dryly. He raised an eyebrow at me.

    “You look pretty serious right now. Something wrong?” I let out a heavy sigh and took a deep breath.

    “I want to leave WGM.” I stated and Lee Soo Man was obviously not happy about that. I could see the veins bulging from his forehead and his face was turning into a deep shade of red. But after a few seconds, he let out a deep breath and calmed himself down. He looked at me with a serious look in his eyes.

    “May I know why?” I hesitated for a moment. There was only one reason why—Tiffany. I can’t keep doing this show now that I know how badly hurt Tiffany is by the situation. I promised her I will fix things and the only way I could think of was to leave WGM.

    But I can’t tell Sajangnim that. I know how berserk he’ll go if he finds out Tiffany is having a relationship with Nichkhun. He made it pretty clear to all his artists that dating was strictly forbidden.

    “I’m really busy lately and I just sign up on a couple of endorsements and CF’s so I don’t think I can squeeze in WGM in my really packed scheduled.” I reasoned with him but he didn’t look convinced. He sighed and rubbed his temples.

    “Victoria, I know for a fact that you have a lot of time to spare for WGM. So instead of excuses, what about you tell me the real reason why you want out?” Sajangnim’s eyes were hard on mine. I gulped in fear.

    “I… I…” I couldn’t think of anything to reason with him. “Please Sajangnim, I just want out.” I pleaded. “I know this is all sudden but I have my reasons… I just can’t tell you.” I mumbled the last part to myself but I think he heard it when he grunted in disagreement.

   “I don’t understand Victoria. You’re doing so well on the show and…” Sajangnim trailed off and was suddenly staring at my face intently, his bushy eyebrows furrowing together. “Don’t tell me…” He muttered. I just froze in my seat as I waited for him to speak. “You know, don’t you?” He chuckled and leaned back against the couch. Sajangnim looked sort of relieved right now.

    “What do you mean?” I asked him questioningly.

    “Tiffany and Nichkhun, you know right?” My jaw dropped when I heard him say their names. He knows?

    “You knew about that?” I asked, still dazed. He nodded and sighed.

    “Okay Victoria, what I’m about to tell you is strictly classified. You can’t tell anyone, understand?” I hesitated for a moment but then nodded. “How much do you know about all this?”

    “I know that Nichkhun and Tiffany are dating and that Nichkhun only joined WGM as a cover up on the rumours.” Tiffany already confessed everything to me that time in the café. I know everything, down to the last detail and I wished I didn’t know to that extent.

    “Did you also know that I was the one who asked Jin Young to sign up Nichkhun for WGM?” He asked. I quickly shook my head. What? I was about to ask him a question but he continued on. “You know how much I care for you girls, right? You know that I would never let any one of you get hurt in this brutal industry?” He said gently, his eyes soft.

    I nodded. Sajangnim was like a father to us here in SM. He takes care of us and protects us no matter what. Even though he can be a bit strict, we all know it’s because he didn’t want any of his artists to fail.

    “Tiffany, she’s still got a long way to go in her career and her involvement with Nichkhun would only bring her down. And I can’t let that happen.” He said, his voice firmed. “So, I need your help Victoria.”

    “My help?”

    “First, you have to keep on doing WGM and—”

    “I’m sorry but I don’t think I would be comfortable being Nichkhun’s wife when he’s already have someone else.” I stated and shook my head. Even though we were virtually married, marriage is still marriage and I hate feeling like my husband was having an affair with someone else. I was suddenly confused about the whole thing now. Is this really called cheating? And who was cheating on whom exactly? Wait, what am I talking about? Ugh, why am I being stuck in the middle of this mess?

    “That’s why you have to go on with the show. I want you two to become Korea’s sweetest couple.” I stared at Sajangnim with wide eyes.

    “You want me to have a relationship with him? That would be cheating!” I exclaimed, shock colouring my tone.

    “On-screen relationship of course and it’s not cheating if you two are already married.” He stated matter-of-factly. I could only gape. “Okay Victoria, there’s no gentle way to say this but I want those two broken up and you’re the only one who could do that.”

    “Now you’re asking me to break them up? Sajangnim, I understand that you’re only trying to protect us but this is way out of line.” I said frustratingly. I suddenly felt a lot more sympathetic towards Tiffany and Nichkhun. I was accidentally stuck in this mess and I was struggling with so much. I can’t imagine what they’re going through right now.

    “It’s not ethical but since you and Nichkhun are already building a loving-couple image, why not we use it to an advantage?” I scratched the back of my head in frustration. “Just act like you’re in love with the guy, it’s as simple as that.”

    “I really don’t understand with any of this Sajangnim. And I don’t think I can act like I’m in love with my friend’s boyfriend.”

    “Think about it Victoria, would Tiffany really be willing to be in a relationship with Nichkhun if everyone keeps buzzing about Khuntoria? She won’t be able to take it. I’m simply just trying to trigger their break up that’s all.” I didn’t like this side of Lee Soo Man. It was devious and manipulative even if he was doing it with good intentions. Sajangnim sighed and stared at me pleadingly. “Please Victoria, I know what I’m asking sounds horrible but it’s for both of their own good. Jin Young is as worried as I am about Nichkhun and Tiffany. You’re actually doing everyone a big favour if you do this.” I sighed. “Besides you and Nichkhun are just acting.” I know Nichkhun was but I was definitely sincere on the show. I groaned mentally and shook my head.

    I didn’t understand and I didn’t want to understand. But if it’s to help Tiffany then I should do whatever I could. I nodded. “Okay, I’ll stay on the show but I won’t promise that things won’t be different between me and Nichkhun.” I sighed mentally in my head. I wondered how I could spend a day with Nichkhun if all I could think about is Tiffany.

    “Thank you Victoria. I really appreciate it.” He smiled warmly at me but I didn’t smile back. “Oh, there’s been something I’ve wanted to ask you.” I raise an eyebrow at him. What now?

    “About what?”

    “It’s about you and Nichkhun. I’ve been monitoring you two and as much as an advantage your chemistry with him is to me, I still need to ask. Do you have feelings for him? Because you both really do look like a couple in love and frankly, I’m a bit worried.” He said in a serious tone.

    Okay, so he wants me to act all lovey-dovey with Nichkhun yet at the same time he was worried about it. Ugh, I really hate being in the middle of all this.

    “Feelings? I spent most of my free time with him so of course there are feelings. But don’t worry, my feelings are nothing more than a simple crush.” I admitted. Of course I lied a bit but it’s still technically true.

    At first my feelings for him was more than just a crush but after seeing Tiffany crying in my arms yesterday, I realized I could just let these feelings go. It was a good thing I didn’t fall too deep for him or I would be drowning in an agonizing pain by now.

    These feelings were just a mere admiration for Nichkhun. It’ll pass… right?