-Zhang Li Yin-

I was sitting on the couch, asking myself whether I should tell Junsu I like him or not when the door suddenly opened and in came a smiling Eunji.

“Looks like someone’s happy. What happened?” I asked her once she sat down on the couch.

“I had a great day.” She said.

“How did it go? Have you realized that you like him?” I asked her, anticipated for her answer.

“Well, I said that I’ll give him a chance. So, I guess you can say that we are dating now. But my feelings for him aren’t strong. I’ll try my best though. But yeah, we had such a fun day. He took me to the movies, then we went to the aquarium, and then we went out for dinner. I had so much fun, especially when we were feeding the dolphins and whales!” Eunji exclaimed.

“That’s great to hear! I’m sure Yunho was ecstatic when you said you’d give him a chance. He’s probably been waiting for you to tell him since day one.” I laughed.

“But I feel bad that I’m not being full hearted towards him. I don’t even want to kiss him.” She dipped her head.

“Don’t worry. Those feelings can grow.” I assured her.

“I hope so. I know Yunho’s a great guy. But right now, I’m not sure if he’s the right guy for me.” She explained.

“Let’s stop talking about me and Yunho. What about you? What’d you do today?” She asked me.

“I went out to the beach. Then I saw Junsu there. We played in the water. That’s it.” I counted off.

“That’s it? Did you tell him yet?” She asked me.

“No.” I quietly said.

“When will you tell him? Doesn’t it seem obvious that he likes you?” Eunji was going to explode one day when if I don’t tell Junsu about my feelings towards him.

“It looks like he likes me. But I’m pretty sure that he’s like that to everyone.” I hesitated.

“Psh…” She rolled her eyes.

“Whatever, I’m going to bed. Nights.” I said before going back to my room.

I shut off the lights and pulled the blanket up to my chin. I stared at the ceilings.

“Why is it so hard for me to tell him?” I asked myself before shutting my eye lids.

I spent most of the night twisting and turning in my bed. I couldn’t fall asleep. Junsu was on my mind the entire night. I couldn’t stop thinking about him.

“Stupid Kim Junsu!” I shouted as I pulled the covers over my head in attempt to fall asleep.

The next morning I woke up too early in the morning. The light was shining into my room and was hurting my eyes. I had no choice but to just wake up.

“Whoa, what were you doing last night? You have the biggest panda eyes.” Eunji greeted me as I entered the kitchen.

“I couldn’t fall asleep. I was thinking about him all night…” I yawned.

“See! You should get things over with and tell him your feelings! You’ll be able to sleep easier.” She persuaded me.

“Well, if it weren’t for his flirty personality, I would have already confessed to him!” I groaned.

“Okay, calm down. We all know he has a flirty personality.” Eunji calmed me down.

“That’s why, I don’t know if I made the right decision to like him or not.” I sighed.

“Don’t worry. Just take a step at a time.” Eunji said.

Days pass by without me talking to Junsu because it was so hard to see him when he’s out all day and all night partying with his friends. I don’t even want to know what he does at night. And plus, I’m always at work.

I haven’t been able to sleep properly because I’ve been thinking of a way to tell him my feelings.

“Didn’t get enough sleep again?” Jaejoong asked me when I went into his office to give him his daily coffee.

I nodded my head with a shameless smile.

“Why don’t you just tell me what’s bothering you. You’ll probably feel a lot better after telling me.” Jaejoong persisted.

“How about you treat me for dinner tonight. Then I’ll tell you.” I joked.

“Sure. Sounds good to me.” Jaejoong agreed.

“What? I was just kidding. You don’t have to treat me to dinner.” I take back what I said.

“Nope, you said it. I’ll take you out for dinner tonight so you can tell me exactly what’s been on your mind lately. I don’t like having my workers think of other things when they are working. It’s not a good habit.” Jaejoong shook his finger.

I gave up and went back outside to do the rest of my work.

We worked until everyone except for Jaejoong and I was gone.

“Ready to leave yet?” Jaejoong tapped on my desk.

“It’s already 7?!” I gasped. I didn’t notice how late it got. Outside was already getting dark and I was still sitting on this chair, working.

“Yes, it is.” Jaejoong replied with a flick on my forehead.

“Hurry up. My stomach is starving. It’s calling for food.” Jaejoong urged me as I got up and put on my jacket and grabbed my purse.

We walked down to his car and he drove us out to a fancy looking restaurant.

“Jaejoong, I didn’t bring enough cash if you’re thinking of going to eat in this restaurant.” I chuckled as we entered through the doors.

“Don’t worry. My treat remember?” Jaejoong assured me as the waitress walked us over to an empty table of two.

“Okay, so, why don’t we talk about why you’re not feeling well lately while the food is being prepared.” Jaejoong fixed his tie.

I hesitated for a moment. But as I looked into Jaejoong’s eyes, it told me that it was alright to tell him.

“It’s just about my love life. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to hear about that.” I said quietly.

“Oh, I see. Don’t worry. I’ll listen.” Jaejoong insisted.

‘Should I tell Jaejoong about Junsu? They’re such great friends. What if Jaejoong tells Junsu?’ I thought, worried. I didn’t want my secret spilling out to other people.

“You can tell me anything. I’ll keep it a promise. I won’t slip out a single letter of it.” Jaejoong assured me.

“What if you break your promise?” I asked him.

“Then it’s up to you. You can do whatever you want.” He replied.

“You promise not to tell a single soul?” I made sure.

“I promise.” He replied confidently.

I took a big gulp of air. I wanted to prepare myself for what I was about to say.

“I like Junsu. But I don’t know if he likes me back. It feels like he does like me, but he treats everyone that way. So I’m really confused right now. I don’t know what to do. Eunji thinks that I should just tell him my feelings, but what if he doesn’t like me? I’m just afraid that our friendship will be ruined.” I told him.

I looked at the dumbfounded Jaejoong. If it weren’t for the waitress giving our food, he would have probably still been dazed at what I had just told him.

“So? Any advice?” I ask him as I played with my food on my plate.

“Um… Well, what I think is, Junsu’s type of girl is not yours. You’ve seen the girls that he hangs out with. I don’t want you to get hurt LiYin. I think you shouldn’t tell him yet. Let him figure it out by himself.” Jaejoong sighed after saying.

“You think I’m not his type? But he treats me so… so… nice.” I sulked.

“You still remember the barbeque we had? Those girls are his type. I’m not saying you’re not pretty or anything. But I know what his type is. Junsu loves to fool around. He won’t like to be serious, and I know you’re the serious type.” He replied.

“But what if that could change? Maybe after he finds out I like him, he’ll change his way of looking at me.” I hoped.

“You could try. But just don’t hurt yourself. Junsu is a very dimwitted person. He won’t know if he hurts you. I guess all I can say is, put yourself in first place. If you feel like you’re ready to tell him, tell him. But just be prepared.” Jaejoong stated.

I nodded and ate the rest of my dinner. We both sat in silence. I was thinking about Junsu.

“Remember, do what you think is the best. And don’t end up letting him hurt you like the other girls he’s dated in the past.” Jaejoong whispered to me before entering back into his house.

When I entered the house, I noticed that Eunji wasn’t back yet. I guess she was out with Yunho. She’s been having a great time with him lately, that’s a good thing.

I went to take a nice hot shower. Then I went back into my room so that I could go out onto the balcony to look at the night sky. There was a little breeze tonight, it felt great.

It wasn’t even five minutes that I’ve sat down on the chair when I saw Junsu coming out too.

“Hey.” He smiled at me as he sat down.

“Hey.” I replied.

‘Great, here’s my chance to tell him.’ I thought as I prepared myself.

“I just heard that you had dinner with Jaejoong.” Junsu stated. I took a look at his face to see any expression. Didn’t seem like he was sad or angry.

“Yeah.” I simply replied.

“That’s great. Jaejoong’s a great guy.” He replied.

“He is.” I said.

‘Come on LiYin! Hurry up and tell him before you change your mind!’ My thoughts told me.

“Is there something that you want to tell me?” Junsu raised one of his eyebrows.

I nodded at him. Then I took a big gulp of air.

‘Here goes nothing.’