Winter
It (does)n’t happen - intermediate -
Minho blinked, surprised to see a young woman open the door of Jinki's home. It took him a moment to realize it was Jinki's possible girlfriend. Either way, a woman different from several months ago. She smiled sweetly and told him to come right in.
Minho shook his head, small smile spreading across his face. “I just came to drop this off.” He held out a wrapped gift for Jinki, a gift for his friend's birthday. He shifted on his feet, cold weather getting to him even behind a big coat and thick scarf. Or maybe that was just anxiety.
Jinki was soon peeking out of the door too, eyes wide. “Minho?”
“Hi. I just wanted to give you this.” Minho held the gift out for at least one of them to hopefully take. It was only a book, which didn’t seem very special to Minho, but he had tried.
Jinki looked excited, smile big. “Come in, we're having cake and--”
“I can't. I have plans, ” Minho cut in, “I wanted to get this to you on your birthday though and apologize about mine.” He didn't say anything more in front of the woman, though Jinki should know what he was referring to – Minho blowing Jinki off for his own birthday this year. It wasn't just Jinki though, it was everyone. It was just a particularly awful day that happened to also land on his birthday to make it worse. Minho didn't expect anything less these days though.
Jinki took the gift, nodding to Minho with a smile all the same, relieving the younger in that way it so often did now. “Thank you.”
The woman rested a hand on Jinki's arm, still looking pretty beside his friend like that. They looked good together – if they weren’t dating Minho thought they should. But they also reminded Minho of his failed attempts to hold a relationship anymore, which stung. He'll just have to try harder, right? Like everything else lately. “I'll see you later. Enjoy the day,” Minho looked between them with a quick bow, “Both of you.”
Minho left, heading to where he was going in the first place, passing busy streets and holiday decorations he barely noticed though they were all around him. This was supposed to be a good, happy time of year right? Or it used to be.
He spent mindless hours at the Internet cafe, not telling anyone. It was a secret after all. Minho fell asleep sitting up at the computer, gaming sounds playing loudly in his headphones that blocked everything out, at least for a while. A persistent buzzing in his pocket brought him back though, and he fumbled to answer his cell, headphones being quickly jerked off.
“Minho?” Jinki’s voice asked over the phone.
“Yeah, what?” Minho blinked his eyes hard, trying to bring focus back. “Sorry, I was busy with things.”
“You know how late it is, right?”
Minho checked, really having no idea. He nearly jumped from the desk, finding the time late enough his family might freak out and he would be found out - in trouble. “Hyung, I gotta go.. I'll see you later--”
“Wait,” Jinki insisted, voice a plea and causing Minho to stop and listen, “I just wanted to tell you Happy Birthday. I hope you liked the gift.”
Minho rubbed his sleepy face, reminded now that his friend had dropped something off for him on his birthday several days ago. He never opened it. “Yeah, thanks. You didn't have to get me anything though.”
“Minho-yah,” Jinki’s soft voice fell serious, “Please go home and sleep. Don't stay there.”
Minho looked around, wondering if Jinki was actually watching him somehow. How would Jinki even know where he was? “I.. uh.. I gotta go. Bye!” He quickly hung up and slammed his phone down on the desk a little too loudly in his sudden frustration and guilt. He quickly looked around with small, apologetic bows to the small crowd of people with him inside the cafe before scrambling out into the cold night.
Minho tried to sneak into his home, but Minseok was still awake eating a snack while he played video games quietly in the family room with his time off. Minho should have probably stayed home with him instead of leaving selfishly. He noted the scattered papers and textbooks over the floor near his brother. Some looked familiar while others looked like they had nothing to do with classes Minho was aware his brother was taking. He felt a prick of bitterness - bitter his brother could still study and had always been better at it than Minho. He quickly shook the thought away.
“Glad you're home, Minho,” Minseok said without turning to him, voice sleepy.
Minho pulled his shoes and coat off, bidding his brother a goodnight and no explanation for why he was out so long. Minseok didn't pry. Not this time.
Once in his room, coming down from his nerves, he threw his scarf to the floor and pulled Jinki's present for him out from under his bed where it had ended up since his birthday. He sat on his bed and slowly opened it.
The gift he found was a framed photo of them over the last summer, not long after Minho had cut his time away in the country short and returned home. Jinki had dropped by his soccer game while on a break from another summer job. The older’s smile was bright enough to fool anyone he was actually tired. He still looked good - relaxed, Minho wasn't sure how he did it. He was even smiling now at the photo despite himself.
His eyes then fell on himself in the picture. Minho was nearly draped over Jinki, bending the older over in a hug while he smiled himself. That day had been a good one, he remembered. He was happy that day. Jinki showing up when he didn't need to just to give him support. It had been an encouragement to Minho. That day his team won. That day really was a good memory.
Minho stared at the photo a while before finding a place for it in his room, a place he could see it and be reminded of the feeling that day.
How to be happy again.
Compared to his other photos in the room, Minho still didn't appear as healthy as he should in it – uniform still bigger than it used to be and skin missing that healthy glow. He didn't see it though. Still didn't even now when he glances in a mirror, dark, baggy eyes hiding behind long hair.
He still had to learn all over again.
Minho went to bed without eating and medication taken on an empty stomach. The morning would probably end up an interesting day.
When Minho woke to find his friend’s gift still sitting where he had left it the night before, he blinked waking eyes at the photo, finding himself lost in it. Minho rose with a purpose that morning, though he wasn’t sure what it was, and an actual appetite for a good meal. He stole food from his brother at breakfast while their parents watched quietly. Minseok scooted his plate over, silently offering Minho has much food as he wanted.
Minho smiled behind his lengthy hair and stuffed cheeks. There was a lightness about his steps that day.
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