Sitting alone at  the cafe, I watched as people pass by. Lost in my own thought, I closed my eyes as I listened to the melody of the song played inside the cafe. I sipped my cappucino allowing the taste to linger inside my mouth.

I looked up when I heard someone tap the table.

"Unnie", I said. She sat at the vacant chair in front of me and placed her drink at the table.

"What are you doing here Ddeulgi? Mind if I join you? Or are you waiting for someone?", she asked with a smile plastered on her face.

"You can join me unnie. I was practicing earlier, I got hungry that's why I decided to come here." I said while giving her an eyesmile.

"You haven't change a bit. Still the hungry bear that I met almost a year ago.Does that mean that you're still a crybaby?" she said while giggling.

"Yura-unnie, that was a year ago. Stop reminding me bout that. It's embarassing." I whinned as I buried my head in my hands. She just chuckled.

Yura unnie and I met when we both filmed a variety show called off to school. I had fun filming with her and she treated me like a real sister. She helped me a lot during filming. I was struggling that time, I was known for being a no-jam that's why I was worried when we are filming  the first episode. But Yura-unnie and Jiwon-oppa helped me a lot, they told me to be comfortable and treat them as friends instead of seniors.

"Your comeback went well right? I heard you topped the charts. As expected from Redvelvet", she said while smiling and I just smiled proudly. We chatted for a couple of minutes until we both decided to part ways.

Instead of going home, I decided to drop by the Karaoke bar. I need to practice my vocals for an incoming competition. I started warming up with dance songs. Flipping the pages of the song book one by one, I scanned for any good song that I can sing during the competition. After finding possible songs and singing it, I decided to call it a day.

When I arrived at the dorm, I saw Irene-unnie at the kitchen probably getting some water to drink.

"Can't sleep?" I inquired.

"Just thirsty. Have you eaten?", she asked with flat affect. I just nodded. After placing the glass in the sink, she just proceeded to her room without even looking at me, not even a goodnight. Odd. Or maybe she's just tired.

After that night, Irene-unnie started behaving weirdly. She would sometimes look at me with her poker face. She stopped clinging into me, too. I decided to let it slide thinking that maybe she's just having her period.

I bid my farewell to my members after we finished our schedule for the day saying I had somewhere else I need to go. Then I catched a glimpse of her again looking at me intently with the same odd expression she's been giving me lately.

I went with my manager-unnie. I have another schedule actually. I'm going to compete in 'King of masked singers'. I am feeling excited yet nervous at the same time. When my manager said that I am going to take part in the show, I agreed right away. When I saw Wendy compete in the said show, I was actually envious of her. I always wanted to take part in a show where my voice would be criticized fairly.

When I first started hitting the notes for the first round, I felt my adrenaline rush. My heart is beating rapidly throughout the song. My competitor is indeed good but that didn't discourage me. I started dancing while singing getting lost in the song. I should do my best, this is our company senior's song after all.


When we finished singing and the judges gave us their feedback, I was feeling elated when I heard them praise my singing. It was all good even if I didn't make it to the second round.

The music starts for my solo song, my heart beating erratically against my chest.

"Gamulgeorineun chueokui chaekjangeul neomgimyeon (When I turn the pages of fading memories)

Kkeutnae irujimothan aswiumgwa chorahan sokjoega (I see frustration and humble atonement regarding the unfulfilled dream)

Yetiyagicheoreom ppuyeon changteului meonjicheoreom (Like an old story or dust on window frame)

Gaseume ssaine ijen meoreojin geudae misocheoreom (Things pile up inside my heart like your smile of the past)"

I closed my eyes feeling the depth of the song I'm singing. I can still feel my heart beating erratically, not just because I'm facing the crowd alone but because this song reminds me of my feelings for her.

" Bibarami eobseodo bomeun ogo yeoreumeun gago geudaeyeo (Even without a storm, spring comes and summer goes, my love)

Nunmuri eobseodo kkoteun pigo nakyeobeun jine (Even without tears, flowers bloom and leaves fall)

Nae nameun geurium sewore ttuiugo jami deune kkumeul kkune (Setting my longing free in the passing time, I fall asleep and dream a dream)"

The instrumental started filling the auditorium. I placed my hand in my chest and closed my eyes. Our memories flashing in my mind. Her face, her smile, her touch, it was painted perfectly in my mind. How we laughed, cried, smiled together. It was as if I'm time travelling. With my heightened emotion, I started singing the pouring every single emotion I feel for her through this song.

"Bibarami eobseodo bomeun ogo yeoreumeun gago geudaeyeo (Even without a storm, spring comes and summer goes, my love)

Nunmuri eobseodo kkoteun pigo nakyeobeun jine (Even without tears, flowers bloom and leaves fall)

Ooh

Nae nameun geurium sewore ttuiugo jami deune kkumeul kkune (Setting my longing free in the passing time, I fall asleep and dream a dream)"

Yes, that's right. 'I set all my longing free in the passing time, I fall asleep and dream a dream' cause I know that only in my dream can I call her mine.

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Author's note:

Listen to Seulgi's Turning the pages of memories to feel the emotion set for this chapter. I was actually listening to that song while writing this chapter. Enjoy Reading