The young dad knew he didn’t owe Sunggyu explanations of his adult/love life but those small eyes showed that the boy couldn’t be dissuaded from this conversation. But Sunggyu was his son’s best friend, so, even if he had something against him because of Sungyeol (which could be justified until a certain point), they had to have a good relationship to please Woohyun. Well, at least so this night could be a bit more peaceful. 

In the end, Myungsoo wasn’t opposed to a conversation, much to the contrary, but the problem was time. Woohyun was in the bathroom and wouldn’t take long to come out, so he was sure he couldn’t sit down and explain things Sunggyu might be concerned with as he would like. He sighed but sat on the bed near the boy and tried to make the best of the little time they had.

“We don't have many opportunities to be alone and I don't think we have much time until Woohyun leaves the bathroom but I want to say something to you. I know I promised I’d take care of your hyung, I know you must think I’m a liar but your brother hurt me really really bad, and…” He almost tripped into his words to apologize quickly but Sunggyu thought it was better to interrupt. Myungsoo was right, they didn’t have much time to talk alone and the boy had a few things to say as well.

“Hyung, I got mad at you because Sungyeol hyung cried a lot and because I thought that without you he would be mean again,” Sunggyu confessed.

“Did he?” Myungsoo asked out of curiosity.

The boy chuckled before replying. “No, hyung cried a lot and almost got sick, but he has been very nice to me and Woohyunnie.” Myungsoo hadn’t words for a moment and the boy took the opportunity to sit on the bed across from the elder. “It’s ok now, I don’t think you’re a liar anymore. He explained that you two were still protecting each other during the project and that he cried and was hurt because he knows he was the one that hurt you.” The boy explained softly then smiled sheepishly. “He also told me he still wants to hook up with you and that I shouldn’t give you a hard time, that’s why I apologized the other day.”

Myungsoo's eyes grew slightly big in surprise. ‘Hook up?’ Did Sunggyu use these specific words? So, Sungyeol filtered stuff and the young Kim didn’t know they dated for real? It stung a little because his ex-lover wasn’t as open to his brother as he thought, but a part of Myungsoo knew it was ok because Sungyeol didn’t exactly owe explanations to an 8-year-old child, even if the boy was his brother. Besides, knowing Sunggyu hadn't 100% information on their status could be useful to mend a relationship he thought was broken with the boy. 

Aside from that, it wasn’t like the boy gave him new information but Sunggyu was a child, and the innocence that accompanied his sincere words confirmed many things that Sungyeol told him in their last conversation. When he finally processed the boy’s words, he felt a bit relieved but knew it wasn’t enough to shake off all of his uncertain feelings. 

“I see.” He stuttered but cleared his throat and continued to vent his worries. “But maybe you still think I’m a liar because of Woohyunnie and...” Myungsoo halted his words once Sunggyu shook his head. “No?” He asked with some bewilderment. “I thought you would be on his side.”

“He told me everything and I’m on his side,” Sunggyu confirmed but he didn’t seem angry so Myungsoo felt clueless. “I wish things have happened differently but even if things are sad, I think it is best to know.”

The elder scratched his head. “But you don’t think I am a liar even though I hid things from Woohyun?”

Sunggyu shook his head again. “You lied, hyung, once. It was about an important thing but I don’t think your love for him is a lie" He said softly then placed his hand over the adults. “And you really, really, love him, I can tell. So I don't think you're a liar as a whole?” Myungsoo immediately looked down to his lap and he tried - gosh, how he tried - to school his features, but Sunggyu’s words and action struck some chords inside him. After the last month, he thought he couldn’t cry anymore but was surprised to feel some tears falling from his eyes. He was touched that a kid could sense his sincerity but at the same time, he was sad it was not the kid he wanted. 

Sunggyu tried to hug him - because hugs always worked to make Woohyun feel better and even between him and Sungyeol - but Myungsoo didn’t accept for long and quickly wiped his tears. “Sorry and thank you, Sunggyu. Your thoughts and feelings also mean a lot to me, even though I wish Woohyun knew this too.”

“He knows.” The boy argued.

“I don’t think he does, not right now,” Myungsoo said as he tried to keep his eyes dry.

“Maybe he doesn’t YET, maybe he is just waiting.” The boy pointed.

“Waiting for what?” Myungsoo dared to ask. He didn’t think the boy had the solutions to his problems but it would be at least interesting to know what Sunggyu expected of him.

“For the right moment to open up to you again.” Still not a solution but it wasn’t like he was completely wrong, maybe Sunggyu just had a different idea about how long it would take for that to happen. The young dad couldn’t exactly guess too but, after his conversation with Hoya, he was sure it wouldn’t happen from day to night. The elder sighed but didn’t say anything back so the boy continued with his former intentions to confront him. “Just like Sungyeol hyung,” He blurted. “Who's waiting for you to open up to him again so you can promote him.”

Myungsoo looked at Sunggyu with a confused face. “Promote?”

“Like in chess hyung, when the pawn reaches the other side of the board and then it gets promoted,” Sunggyu explained with an obvious tone but, at the same time, he was very proud of his knowledge and the fact he was using an analogy, something he knew Woohyun and his dad liked. 

Myungsoo couldn’t help but chuckle, but he didn’t know if he found the analogy funny or if it was just the way Sunggyu explained it. Either way, a chess analogy had the Lees-Kims household signature all over. He just didn’t know if this was something Sunggyu came up with on his own or if it was Sungyeol’s view on what was currently happening to him in general or specifically in their situation. Great, another thing to think about. He sighed. At least he already knew Sungyeol expected to come out of this limbo they were in, not being anything at the moment. But he didn’t know exactly what Sungyeol would be promoted to yet.

“Should I promote his pawn to a knight then?” He tried to joke but Sunggyu didn’t think it was funny and became serious.

“No, that would be weird, he has to be your queen.”

“Sungyeol hyung is a boy though, shouldn’t he be my king then? Then we would be a couple of kings.” Myungsoo asked to be certain that Sunggyu’s words and understanding of his past/future relationship with Sungyeol was in the right place.

Sunggyu had a mini breakdown because in his head Myungsoo wasn’t understanding anything but in the end, his serious/determined expression didn’t change much. 

“No, there can be only one king to protect and it is Woohyunnie.” He said very seriously and that answer surprised Myungsoo. It seemed that more than thinking about their relationship, Sunggyu was one step ahead of him and understood not only Woohyun’s importance in his life but how the younger could also affect things between him and Sungyeol. His surprise and lack of words prompted Sunggyu to continue his explanation. “You’re also a queen on the board, trying to protect Woohyunnie, but if you promote Sungyeol hyung to another queen... you’ll have more chances of winning the match.”

“Ok, and what does ‘promoting Sungyeol hyung to a queen’ really mean in real life?” Myungsoo dared.

“Dating.” Sunggyu blurted the obvious. 

“Do you realize you just said I have to worry about Woohyun and my current relationship with him is not good? Wouldn’t that mean he is in check already? What if promoting Sungyeol hyung means checkmate with Woohyun?”

“Yes, but chess doesn’t work like that.” The boy blinked.

“Sungggyu, you started this so you know what I'm talking about.” Myungsoo gave him a warning glare.

“I know but Sungyeol hyung is not the enemy, he is one of your pieces so it will be a checkmate only if you under-promote him.” 

“Under-promote?” The elder made a confused expression

“Aigo hyung, promoting Sungyeol to something that it isn’t dating so he wouldn’t be your queen,” Sunggyu explained with frustration. “Something else won’t do.”

Myungsoo chuckled although this conversation startled to unsettle him. “And why’s that?”

“Because ...” Sunggyu halted his words as he thought about what he should say. He wanted to help everyone and not make things worse but there was something he needed to say that could help the young dad let go of some fears. “... because Woohyunnie asked to live with us a couple of times...” He hesitantly said.

Myungsoo got up from the bed and started pacing back and forth as he ran a hand through his hair. It hurt him to hear that Woohyun asked this but at the same time this didn’t feel completely foreign to him. Sungyeol had been doing damage control so of course their trust and connection grew. It didn’t take long for him to turn to the young boy.

“That’s not possible Sunggyu. Woohyun is not something I could give away; even if I could, I wouldn’t.”

“I know and hyung explained that to him.” The boy argued but Myungsoo continued ranting.

“And even if I ‘promote’ your brother, I’m not jumping on anything that remotely resembles a marriage so soon. Your hyung and I didn’t even completely makeup and...” 

“I know but you can make up and date, Woohyunnie wouldn’t mind now.” The boy interrupted with an encouraging tone, similar to the one his brother used whenever he wanted Sunggyu to eat vegetables. “There is no project anymore and now that Woohyunnie knows everything, he will support it. So what is going on with you that you didn’t make a move yet?” He demanded and Myungsoo sighed again, more to calm himself than anything. This question made evident the boy didn’t know about the conversation he and Sungyeol had on the weekend, and if his ex didn’t say anything, he wouldn’t either.

He approached the boy and squatted near him. “Look Sunggyu,” He halted his words because he heard a noise - which meant Woohyun would come out of the bathroom soon - and then he rushed his speech out. “Sometimes things don’t happen as we want, ok? It is not because my project is over that everything between hyung and I will magically get solved. Things between Woohyun and I need my attention and Hyung still didn’t get his job yet and, while that doesn’t happen, I’ll take some time to think about what I should do.”

“But you will do something right?” Sunggyu rushed to ask as they heard the door open and Woohyun steps could be heard soon after.

“I talked to hyung today, haven’t I?” Myungsoo asked back and Sunggyu was about to make a satisfied expression when Woohyun entered the room while trying to dry his hair. 

“I need help.” He announced and the young dad was ready to jump at the opportunity.

“Come here, I’ll help you out.” He beckoned.

“No.” Woohyun blurted while throwing a distrustful look and Myungsoo sighed tiredly.

“I can do it.” Sunggyu offered, maybe a bit too happy. It was not a thrilling act but what Myugsoo said just brightened his mood.

The young dad moved to the desk and got Woohyun things and then Sunggyu’s at the bed. “I’ll arrange your things so you can study at the dinner table since it has more than one chair, ok?” He explained but didn’t expect a reply, so when Sunggyu hummed he made his way to the door. Before he crossed it, it occurred to him that Sunggyu hadn’t spoken about himself this entire time and he wondered how the boy felt in the middle of all that. “Sunggyu, out of curiosity, what are you?”

“Me?” The boy turned to ask and Woohyun looked from one to the other.

“What are you talking about?”

Sunggyu turned to look at Woohyun and started drying his friend's hair again. “Chess, Woohyunnie, we were talking about chess." Woohyun rolled his eyes because he wasn't as thrilled about that game as his neighbors were and Sunggyu felt comfortable enough to reply. “I’m the king.” He said confidently and Myungsoo smiled because of it. So Sunggyu was aware of his importance in Sungyeol’s life too? That was good to know, at least they both hadn’t to get worried by problems with Sunggyu appearing to slap their face. “But if you let me I can be a bishop for you.” The boy added and his boldness surprised Myungsoo. Did Sunggyu just ask to be allowed to in? Or he was going crazy? In front of Woohyun too?

“We’ll see about that.” Myungsoo awkwardly replied. “Is your brother playing chess lately?”  

Sunggyu stopped his hands on Woohyun’s head for a second or two as he thought about a suitable answer. “Yes.” 

"How's that going?"

“He had a weird strategy at first, and I think he was close to checkmate. Then he got another queen but was forced to sacrifice it.” Sunggyu turned his head to Myungsoo and made sure to express with his eyes that he was talking about him. “The king is safe, for now, but the absence of the other queen is harmful in many ways.” Myungsoo couldn’t help but gulp hard with that.

“Chess is irritating.” Woohyun mumbled as he pushed Sunggyu’s hands away, deeming his head was already dry enough. "And a match takes forever."

“I agree, a chess match takes too long for my liking.” Myungsoo agreed although he kept looking at Sunggyu, who looked from father to son while his friend made a face. 

"It isn't." He protested but Woohyun turned to him with a judging expression, he couldn't believe what he just heard.

“You know what Sunggyu?" Myungsoo said, which caught the boys' attention. "I’m better at sports and maybe your brother should play them a bit." 

Woohyun snorted, Sungyeol knew everything but playing sports… he doubted that hyung would be able to play any sport for more than fifteen minutes. He hated to admit it but, liking it or not, Myungsoo was the one better at them. But, Sunggyu - that was the one bringing up and developing the chess analogy a little further - didn’t understand. He knew Myungsoo wasn’t talking about the sport itself and was probably trying to say something about Sungyeol, but since Woohyun was there, he didn’t want to be too obvious about it. 

“Sports also have a strategy, but, different from chess - that you build up your strategy over time and can try to predict the opponent's exact moves - in sports like basketball, and soccer…” He looked briefly at Woohyun so Sunggyu knew he was talking about the younger boy. “...you can’t do that. Every second is a battle and everything can change drastically fast, so a player doesn’t have time to think about future moves because they need to take action the moment things happen. Besides, in sports like these, a person doesn’t play alone. Every player has to be aware of the strategy and work together for it. They should always communicate and trust each other and their abilities to have each other’s back too. If players can’t do that, no strategy will work.”

While Sunggyu thought about those words, Woohyun had no idea Myungsoo was talking about Sungyeol but they impacted him. Surely they weren’t a good place because Myungsoo didn’t ‘communicate’ something important but he wondered if those words were about them. So Myungsoo didn’t think about telling him about his origins because he was already ‘battling’ to raise him? Woohyun thought a little about everything Myungsoo ever shared about being a dad at such a young age and all the judging looks he ever received… There was a lot to battle indeed. Myungsoo also always told him they were a team. Until the past month, they did work together for things to work, they shared whenever they had a problem and comforted each other, and they helped each other in everything they could. They communicated a lot before and trust was always there… they had each other’s back but now...

“Don’t you think your brother needs to learn a thing or two from it?” Myungsoo wrapped up his speech and both boys snapped out of their thoughts, even though both of them couldn’t conclude. The three of them stood in silence for a few seconds until Myungsoo turned around to take the boy's things to the dinner table.

As Myungsoo turned his back, Sunggyu knew the conversation was over now, but he couldn’t let the elder go like this, he had to say something.

“Teach him.” He pleaded and the elder stopped to sigh deeply. “I teach Woohyunnie and he learns, if you teach my hyung he can learn too.” The boy argued even though he wasn’t sure his words made sense with everything else.

“Would he want to learn though?” The elder asked but before Sunggyu could say anything Myungsoo walked away.

As the elder boy's shoulders deflated, Woohyun frowned. Sungyeol talked in Myungsoo’s favor before and the boy was aware of his older friend's feelings for Myungsoo, but the taller one didn't talk about their situation for the past month. Yes, he saw them talking today and knew they met for the project, but they were off. It wasn’t as awkward as when the two started to talk but they seemed distant. 

Woohyun knew that the project situation (that was over now) prevented the two adults from trying to make up, but did he even care about the reason they fought now? If he could still play with Sunggyu and see Sungyeol, did he even still want both adults to make up? 

He got up from the bed and tried to find a comb. Once he did, he turned to Sunggyu with a few questions. “Hyung, you were not talking about chess, right? What was going on?”

Sunggyu let out an insufferable sigh, he couldn’t tell Woohyun what he wanted but it wasn’t like he thought he should let his friend completely in the dark. “I guess I was just trying to make him talk to Sungyeol hyung again.”

“They talked to each other before we came here.” The younger said idly as he combed his hair in front of the mirror. 

“Yes, but not like before, I want them to forget their fight and make up for real,” Sunggyu said and added a pout in the end.

Woohyun stopped combing his hair (it was good enough) and turned to Sunggyu again. “Do you know why they fought in the first place?” Sunggyu only sighed again and Woohyun took that as if his friend also didn’t know. He clicked his tongue and then reached his conclusion. “It doesn’t matter.” 

“Woohyunnie, why do you say that?”

“Because they told us to not in?” Woohyun said with an obvious tone then further explained. “Things were weird for a while but I’ve been able to see and play with you and Sungyeol hyung almost every day so I’m not worried about this anymore.”

“And we’re gonna let them be awkward forever?” The elder boy asked but didn’t wait for his friends’ reply. “Woohyunnie, hyung needed encouragement to apologize to your dad and you in the beginning and I already talked to him. He says he wants to talk and apologize to Myungsoo hyung but he will wait for him, so the only thing left to do is to encourage your dad too.“ 

“He is not my dad.” Woohyun rolled his eyes, which was ok, he wasn’t gritting his teeth or saying the same sentence with anger anymore. “And who says it will be a good thing?”

Sunggyu blinked a lot with that question. “It will though.”

Woohyun shook his head. “You’re saying that because Sungyeol hyung likes him.”

“So?” Sunggyu continued to blink in confusion. “Weren’t you ok with that?”

“No hyung, you got it wrong.” Woohyun marched towards the bed and sat where he was sitting previously so he could explain himself. “At first I thought d-Myungsoo-shi wouldn’t ever return his feelings, so I was worried about Sungyeol hyung getting hurt, but now....”

“Now…?”

“Now I know he likes boys - so I guess he could return Sungyeol hyung's feelings - and If I knew this before…” Sunggyu perked up but Woohyun didn’t conclude that thought, which was a bit disappointing. “But he lied to me! He can hurt Sungyeol with his lies too! Besides, we don’t know who is in the wrong in this fight.”

“But Woohyunnie, what if…” Sunggyu was ready to argue in his brother's favor and try to push Woohyun further down this liking-them-together path but his friend interrupted him.

“What if he says he loves Sungyeol hyung but doesn’t? Won’t Sungyeol hyung get hurt?” 

Sunggyu halted his words, then he had to admit his friend wasn’t exactly wrong. If Myungsoo were to say he didn’t love Sungyeol anymore... his brother would be sad, probably as sad as he was when they first fought or, worse. At the same time, everything he knew about the elders' fight made him know that lack of love wasn’t a problem. Sungyeol loved Myungsoo, without any doubt, while Myungsoo was a lot hurt, but if they were to talk and apologize, maybe they could get back together.

“Boys.” They heard Myungsoo's voice calling, and both boys almost jumped in place before they saw Myungsoo at the door again. “Your things are ready, come study for a bit.” He instructed quickly then disappeared in his room direction.

Woohyun took that chance to send a serious look at his friend and make sure to wrap up their conversation. “Let’s not talk about this anymore hyung. I love Sungyeol hyung, let’s take care of him.” 

Woohyun got up from the bed and came out of his room while Sunggyu huffed with a bit of frustration then narrowed his eyes in determination. Yes, he agreed that they should take care of his hyung, but Woohyun was wrong, those two needed to talk and get back together so he was going to pester Myungsoo every time they managed to be alone. 

Sunggyu came after his friend and sat beside him at the table so they could study. It was not like kids like them needed much time to study but Dongwoo made sure to send home some exercises so they could review things before their exams. Not only that, they need to practice spelling some words and reading out loud as well.

To be honest, Sunggyu thought that Woohyun would probably need more explanations. But, from what he could see, Sungyeol had explained well when his friend was skipping school, so Woohyun didn’t complain or ask questions before they started.

Despite getting some focus from the go, it didn’t take long for it to disappear once Myungsoo came back to the living room. The adult was carrying a box of letters (one that Sunggyu recalled seeing in Sungyeol hands before) and that caught both boys' attention. 

“What are you doing?” Woohyun asked first, with his eyes squinted, suspicious. 

“Me?” Myungsoo asked as he sat on the couch and put his feet over the coffee table to 1- get comfortable and 2 - make sure to show he hadn’t any intention to leave. “I’ll just stay around in case you two need any help.”

“We won’t need you, Sungyeol hyung already taught us last week,” Woohyun said and Sunggyu frowned as he looked between father and son.

“Is that so?” Myungsoo pretended to be unbothered. “Then I guess I’ll just read something here.” He pulled a letter out of the box and started to open it as Woohyun turned to his hyung with an angry face. Sunggyu could only shrug, it wasn’t like he could ask the adult to go away, this was his place, and Sungyeol didn't want him to treat Myungsoo badly. In the end, there was nothing he could do (other than what he already did today).

“Let’s just finish homework soon so we can play before bedtime.” The elder boy ended up suggesting and he watched his friend adjust the grip on his pencil and use more force before they both tried to focus again.

Myungsoo had supervised both kids before and, though sometimes they needed some coaxing, they didn’t give much trouble once they got started. Sometimes he needed to answer a question or give some instruction but the boys could mostly do things alone. Knowing that their homework wasn’t the reason why Myungsooo made sure to linger around the living room, but he had a relevant couple.

First and foremost, Woohyun had run away from home. Yes, almost a month had passed since then - a month in which his parents and Sungyeol kept a close eye on the boy - and, surely, Woohyun hadn't tried again, but he couldn't help but worry about that. They had made some progress and the boy had accepted to spend some time with him but, like it or not, they were still not a good place and Myungsoo didn't trust him completely alone (even if he had locked the door and hidden the key).

Secondly…. He was finally going to relent and read those damn letters. “Urghh.” He grunted in a short mental breakdown once he thought about his previous resistance and that got him a shush from Woohyun.

At first, he thought he had both parties' letters in his possession but the moment he pulled the first one up, he remembered his mother took those she wrote herself back to Incheon. He sighed internally. This meant he couldn’t even pretend to deviate his focus by trying to read something about himself, everything would be all about the Lees (Sungyeol only).

Dynamic reading. Myungsoo decided he would read it like that, especially the parts where Sungyeol's mother talked about her business, he wasn’t remotely interested in that. Maybe he was if that affected Sungyeol and shaped his personality or his views on things. On the other hand, he didn’t think his ex-lover hid anything about that, but then again, Sungyeol discovered new stuff during the project and they couldn’t talk about it. At that point, he didn’t even want to, but now that he was open to the universe (or just really people) interference he got a bit curious.

He didn’t imagine the letters would be that long but some of them had good four pages, back, and front and Sungyeol wasn’t lying, sometimes the two mothers did talk in codes. But since he was dynamic reading, he was able to skip, some issues with Sungjong, Sunggyu's pregnancy discovery, and how Sungyeol's mother met Sunggyu’s father. He knew his mother must have organized them by date and so on but, yes, he wasn’t reading in any particular order. He wanted to be surprised.

He was into the third (or maybe it was the fourth) letter when he heard Sunggyu.

“I finished it!” The boy announced, then peeked at his friend’s notebook to check if the boy had finished it too. Things were half answered. Once he brought his eyes up, he saw Woohyun looking (more like glaring) at Myungsoo from the corner of his eyes. The elder boy sighed and then scolded. “Woohyunnie! You were supposed to finish studying so we could play a bit.” 

“I know but he is right there and I can’t concentrate.” The boy complained in the same whispery tone his friend used. “Can't he leave?” 

“Woohyunnie, he isn’t doing anything.” Sunggyu was a bit exasperated, even when he and Sungyeol weren’t on good terms they could still stand each other’s presence if both were doing their own thing.

“I know but…” The boy was about to get distressed when Myungsoo interrupted.

“I can hear you.” He then laid the letter down and sat up to look at the boys. “What's the problem with me?”

‘You’re here.”

“So? I live here.” He replied calmly.

Woohyun placed both hands on the chair’s top rail to roll his eyes and retort. “But why do you need to stay here all the time?” 

Myungsoo squinted his eyes at his son’s audacity and Sunggyu started to shake his head, he had a bad feeling this would become a fight. Myungsoo was more patient - Sungyeol did change but Sunggyu wasn’t sure his brother would accept that kind of behavior even now, but he also didn’t seem to like Woohyun's attitude as well. 

Instead of starting a fight, Myungsoo took a deep breath to calm himself. He knew things wouldn’t change out of nowhere so he kinda expected something like this to happen.

“Woohyun, I’m sure you know why.” He said softly but used a pointy stare that made the boy uncomfortable. Woohyun knew very well what he did and why Myungsoo didn’t trust him. “Besides, you said you’d put effort today.”

“Yes, but...”

“I know it is awkward and difficult for you, this is why I told you you didn’t need to force yourself too much today, but you do realize that if you’re gonna complain every other minute you’ll, even if in a bad way, interact more than you want with me?” Myungsoo pointed and Woohyun pressed his lips together, there was nothing he could say. “Once you finish homework, I promise I won’t be glued by your side.” He raised the letter in his hand. “I found... something interesting to read.”

Woohyun still gave him a suspicious look. Myungsoo was a bit right, the more he complained the more they would interact and so far the elder had been keeping his promises, he didn’t ask anything unreasonable other than a bath and homework. The boy quickly lost interest in a fight with Myungsoo, so he decided to annoy Sunggyu by pulling his friend’s notebook. “Let me see your answers.”

Sunggyu immediately pulled his notebook back. “No, Sungyeol hyung says I shouldn’t give them to you.” There was a bit of pull and push but neither of the boys took things too seriously and soon enough they were giggling. Myungsoo didn’t into part them and merely laid back down to read because Sunggyu asked his friend to finish it quickly.

Truth to his promise, once the boys left for Woohyun's room, Myungsoo didn’t follow them, he had found interesting stuff by then. Some amusing, some endearing, and some just heavy. 

Surely Sungyeol's mother's frustration at her son’s unusual intelligence was amusing - for him - but he imagined his ex-lover wouldn’t feel the same way. If he had to guess anything, this and the conversation with his parents were enough to make Sungyeol have trouble sleeping. And if he were to believe his ex-lover had the same troubles he had after they broke up… it could add to the mix and explain his feverish state. But, even if ‘bullying’ was never mentioned, some things happened to Sungyeol… no child should ever go through that.

Myungsoo deemed he had enough for the day so he turned the lights off and moved back to his room. He could hear the boys talking to themselves, but all he could hear was some blabbering and he couldn’t identify what kind of mood they were in. He tossed the box near his bed and moved for a bath. Once he returned, he checked on the children.

“Is everything ok here?” He asked after he opened the door. The boys were already wearing their pajamas, sitting on the bed across from each other, but both of them seemed a bit jumpy. Everything was ok, but Myungsoo could only guess they had been talking about him.

“Yes!” Both boys were quick to reply even though Woohyun seemed a bit annoyed.

Myungsoo pretended he was unbothered and entered the room. “It’s 9 already boys, time to sleep because you have a long day ahead of you tomorrow, you know the drill.”

Sunggyu nodded and promptly moved beside his friend while Woohyun sighed and moved slowly. The elder helped them with the sheets and then tried to tuck them in. Sunggyu accepted the help - he was a bit lazy, yes, but he liked this kind of moment too - his father always tucked him in, or Sungjong. Sungyeol also did this, at first not often but now, almost every day. Meanwhile, Woohyun's whole attitude was like ‘I don’t need you, I can do it alone’.

“Do you need anything more?” He asked as he recoiled his hands.

If this had been before, Woohyun would probably try his chances and ask for some cookies, now he just let out a dry ‘no’. Myungsoo felt slightly disappointed but also ultimately surprised when Sunggyu opened his mouth.

“A kiss.” Woohyun slightly glared but Sunggyu seemed unaffected, sure of himself and expectantly. Myungsoo didn't know how to act but figured the best thing to do was not let the boys wait, Sunggyu for his kiss, and Woohyun for him to leave.

He got close and then leaned down to plant a kiss on the boy’s forehead. “Thank you for coming today.”

“Thank you for having me, and for the kiss.” Sunggyu chuckled, pleased, and Myungsoo pressed his lips in a thin smile. He didn’t dare to look at his son to discover his reaction, but he couldn’t stay another second in a situation like this. Once he closed the door, he struggled to get a hold of his feelings. This was so ed up. Sunggyu wasn’t to blame, he was only a child, but the situation was almost claustrophobic. He could give Sunggyu love, the problem wasn’t him. It just… it felt too foreign to hear a boy that wasn’t his Woohyun asking these kinds of things from him. Besides, he didn’t think that kissing Sunggyu's forehead would ever fill the void in that little heart.

“Hyung, why did you ask for a kiss?” Myungsoo heard Woohyun ask, his voice muffled by the door, but a little petulant.

“Because I don’t have a daddy to kiss me anymore.” Sunggyu's reply was also muffled, but simple and sad so Myungsoo felt his heartstrings being pulled. Of course, Sunggyu received love from his brothers, but they were brothers, they would never be more than that.

The answer for that was silence, Woohyun didn’t reply. A few seconds later, there was the noise of someone turning in bed and Sunggyu could be heard again. 

“Good night Woohyunnie.” Woohyun didn’t reply. If he did, Myungsoo couldn’t hear.

He returned to his room with sluggish steps and a heavy heart. Everything about this night made him feel emotionally tired and he wanted to let out some tears so he could take this constriction partly off his chest. Still, it was hard and weird for him to cry like this.

He moved to his closet to grab some photo books. The only door he kept closed, to protect his secrets from Woohyun hadn't been locked for some time… and probably would never be locked again, he hadn’t any more big secrets to keep. Yes, he dated Sungyeol behind his son’s back but he had a feeling this wouldn’t make things so much worse than they already were. 

He grabbed two big and heavy photobooks and lay on the bed with them. He wanted to see the pictures he took himself of a time when Woohyun only knew how to smile when he picked up and discovered things every week, and when he was too small to understand, to get this angry.

Every picture was painful to see and choosing some of them for his project was also a painful time. Yet, it was good to see them because they made Myungsoo's brain be filled with memories and focus on the joy of such moments. Even with things the way they are, he didn’t regret them. At all.

He passed every page slowly, savoring each memory until the photobooks were over. Once that happened, he pushed them to the side and grabbed his laptop to continue the process, he had a lot more on his hard drive (and now on the cloud too). 

Unknown to him, Woohyun couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to, he tried, but today events kept replaying in his head. He wanted to be angry when they happened, he tried to, but he couldn’t, Myungsoo hadn’t pushed him to do anything specific. The elder presence had been unsettling through the night but not per se, but because it was a reminder of things he didn’t want to think about. Besides, Myungsoo was the only other person deeply involved in everything that happened and available for him to vent. Still, even when he complained, he felt like nothing was achieved. Besides, Sunggyu’s words left him weird, thinking bout something that was completely forgotten in the last month.

Just like him, Sunggyu hadn’t a mommy, and Woohyun didn`t know if it was better to never have met her or have met her but lose her later.

The difference between them was probably Sunggyu’s daddy. His friend said his mother worked a lot (and Woohyun also had heard that from Sungyeol and even Sungjong) so he spent more time with his daddy. And despite being busy with his rockstar life (whatever that was), Sunggyu said his father would always shower him with love. Myungsoo always did that. In the past. When Woohyun didn’t know. 

Woohyun looked to the side, Sunggyu slept peacefully beside him, his breath soft and even. He carefully slipped out of the bed and did the best he could to not wake up his friend on his way out of the room. Woohyun wanted to go to the kitchen, maybe try to search the fridge for some milk to help him sleep, but he heard a noise coming from Myungsoo's room that got him curious. He moved carefully and tried his best to stay hidden in the shadow as he peeked inside the elder's room.

Myungsoo was laying on his bed, belly down, as he played on his computer. Because of that position, Woohyun was sure he couldn’t be spotted and it was advantageous to see what Myungsoo was doing. There are a few photo books on the side and the elder seemed to be gazing fixedly at another picture on the screen. He sniffled and Woohyun recoiled just enough to watch him rub his wrist on his nose and mumble to himself.

“I just wish you knew how much I love you and-and how much you mean to me.” He changed pictures on the screen and chuckled at something Woohyun couldn’t see. “I won’t give up, it doesn’t matter how much you blame and hate me, I will not give up on you.” Another sniffle. “I don’t know how to be anything other than your father, things only matter because I have you.” Woohyun pressed his lip together and Myungsoo gasped. “God, look at the time, this is no good.” 

As Myungsoo pressed the screen down, Woohyun knew he would probably get up to put things away so he carefully went back to his room before the elder got up to turn the lights off. Sunggyu stirred a bit in bed once he closed the door, but ended up just turning to the other side. Woohyun breathed relief and moved his feet back to his bed, but before he climbed on it, he had an idea. 

First, he moved silently to his desk, he knew his red backpack was somewhere over there and he needed something from it. As he patted around trying to find it, and once he did, he kept his eyes on Sunggyu as he warily attempted to take things out of it. Some papers with drawings and a mask he made in art class were taken out and smaller things moved inside as they assembled. With bigger things out of the way, it was just a matter of time for him to take out what he wanted: his old but fixed plushie toy.

He hugged the yellowish plushie to his chest and then planted a kiss on its head before he got back on his back. Sunggyu turned again once Woohyun was fixing the covers but he didn’t wake up so Woohyun just hugged the plushie to his chest again and sighed. The night might be long but now he might be able to sleep.

_____________________________________________

The alarm sounded on Myungsoo earlier than usual during the past month and he almost broke his phone while trying to stop it. He got up but soon noticed that dried tears felt like glue and he couldn’t exactly open his eyes. After a short ride to the bathroom to fix that, Myungsoo decided it was best if he had already gotten ready for the day.

He hadn’t bothered to fill the pantry that much when Woohyun was away, but he bought food and prepared things beforehand so he moved to the kitchen. The truth was that the school provided food, but he and Sungyeol always prepared something extra for the kids to eat in case they didn’t like something (and considering Sunggyu was picky, Sungyeol had to prepare something every day).

Once lunch and breakfast were sorted he moved to the kid's room and opened the curtain mid-way. “Hey guys, time to wake up.” He said in a tone high enough for the kids to hear but low enough to not startle them. 

Both stirred but only Sunggyu sat on the bed to rub his eyes. “Did you sleep well Sunggyu?” Myungsoo asked him with a warm smile but slightly raising the volume of his voice, Woohyun was not waking up.

“Yeah?” Sunggyu rubbed his eyes again, why was he seeing the elder’s eyes puffed? Was he still dreaming? 

“Did you bring your uniform and everything you’re gonna need today?”

“Yes.” The boy said as he slipped out of bed and pointed at him. “Hyung your eyes are puffed.”

“I know.” He glanced at Woohyun as he spoke and while Sunggyu understood that his friend was the cause of these puffed eyes, Myungsoo became surprised as he spotted the plushie that had not been in his son’s eyes the previous night. He wanted to smile because this could be a good sign but he decided to keep his thoughts to himself for the time being. “Can you take your bath first Gyu?” He asked softly then moved to sit beside Woohyun on the bed.

Sunggyu did what he was told but before he left the room, he recalled Sungjong's advice on the day Sungyeol had been weird and turned to speak to Myungsoo. “Hyung.” The young dad turned to look at him. “Everything will be ok, we all love you.”

Myungsoo couldn’t help but smile as Sunggyu skipped through the room to give him a brief hug. 

“Thank you, Sunggyu.” He returned the hug and ruffled the boy’s hair after they parted. “I’m glad Woohyun has you and I hope you can stay beside him for many many years.” Sunggyu felt a mix of proudness and shyness and ended up giggling as he skipped toward the bathroom.

Myungsoo chuckled one more time as he watched him but then sighed deeply to try the hardest part: waking up his son. “Namu!” A little shake. “Namu, it’s time to go to school.” The boy moved his legs, a sign he might be regaining consciousness. “Namu, it’s time to get up.” He insisted softly and slightly rubbed the boy’s back until he opened his eyes.

“Already~~~?” The boy asked with a voice full of sleep, he still couldn’t tell well who was talking to him.

“Already, come on, get up.” Myungsoo encouraged but Woohyun just moved enough to stick his face on the pillow. 

“Noooo~~” He whined and Myungsoo frowned. Woohyun usually didn’t give him trouble waking up, he usually woke up full of energy. Something could be up or it could be a trick he developed in the past month. 

Myungsoo promptly tried to feel the boy’s temperature. “What’s wrong? Do you feel sick?” He asked worriedly and Woohyun noticed then who he was dealing with.

“No.” He said as he tapped Myungsoo's hand away but the elder already knew everything was normal. “Five more minutes.” He begged.

“Woohyun, Sunggyu is already taking a bath, and breakfast is ready. Grandpa and Grandma will come to pick you guys up today so you won’t get late.” He tried to reason and Woohyun whined but ended up getting up, eyes full of sleep and dark circles under his eyes. “You had trouble sleeping?” The boy nodded. “Is anything bothering you?”

“No.” He lied but hugged the plushie close to his chest. He was bothered by these conflicting feelings but if he told the truth, it would be worse.

“I'm sorry, I can’t let you skip school because you already skipped too much. Besides, you also have a test today, it wouldn’t be good to skip it.” Woohyun sighed heavily and the young dad decided to open an exception. “If you’re done with exams early you can ask Dongwoo hyung to call your grandparents to pick you up, what do you say?”

Woohyun got interested but that plan wasn’t foolproof. “What if Grandma is working?”

“You still have grandpa and me.” The boy didn’t seem convinced so he couldn’t help but add. “You’ll always have me, Woohyun.”

“Ok.” The boy sighed and slowly got upfront from the bed. Myungsoo observed him take two steps away before the boy came back for his plushie, he didn’t want to leave his precious friend behind.

Twenty minutes later both boys were pristinely dressed in their uniforms as they sat to eat. Woohyun still moved (and chew) sluggishly but, by a miracle, Sunggyu felt more energetic than his friend, so - knowing that little disasters followed Sunggyu, Myungsoo practically covered him up in towels to not dirty his uniform. As they ate, he tried to make a small chat.

“So, are you guys ready for today’s exam?” Woohyun decided not to reply so Myungsoo continued talking to Sunggyu. “Did he study anything?”

“Woohyunnie knows a lot and Sungyeol hyung helped us with math lately. We did our math exam yesterday - very easy - there are only easier exams from now on. Today is the Korean exam.”

“What about the festival? The big day is coming, are you rehearsing your song?” Myungsoo thought that topic would be more interesting for the boys and while Sunggyu became tense, Woohyun slightly pouted. There was something wrong. “What happened?” He asked.

“I’m not gonna sing.” Woohyun had half a mind to reply.

“What? Why? You were so excited about...” Myungsoo blinked in surprise. Before he and Sungyeol broke up this was everything the kids could talk about and as far as he knew, they were taking the festival so seriously that they changed songs many times. He couldn’t believe what he heard, he didn’t see this coming at all, why did no one inform him? 

“I’m still gonna sing but…” Sunggyu said as he warily took a look at his friend.

“I don’t want to.” The younger blurted.

“He’s gonna be on a play.” Sunggyu tried to explain but it was clear by his tone that he didn’t like his friend doing something he deemed inferior.

Myungsoo leaned on his chair looking completely lost. “I don’t understand, why? You sing so well and you were so happy and excited to sing with Sunggyu…” Myungsoo blabbered confusedly. 

“But I don’t want to sing.” I have no mood because of you. Woohyun made a face as he looked intently at Myungsoo but the young dad wouldn’t exactly read the boy's feelings even if he felt the blame the boy was putting on him.

“But I was... I was looking forward to your singing performance.” Myungsoo continued with his confusion. 

The boy looked away and played with his food for a bit. “I’ll be on a play with other kids from my class, we already rehearsed it.”

“But are you sure about it...?” The boy nodded. “Woohyun, missed chances never return, and singing at a school festival is part of…” He tried to reason but Woohyun had enough of this conversation.

“You don’t need to come then.”He pushed his plate away and got up. “The festival is only for our families.” He added - obviously implying he didn’t think of Myungsoo as such - before walking back to his room.

The young dad and Sunggyu shared a look and the elder sighed at a loss.

“I’m gonna talk to him.” Sunggyu got up and started to unwrap himself from the towels Myungsoo placed over his uniform.

“Don’t insist, Sunggyu.” Myungsoo pleaded tiredly as he massaged his temples. 

“No, Hyung, you can’t just sit and wait, you need to…” Sunggyu tried to argue, but an idea just crossed his mind and he ended up halting his words. Myungsoo used that chance to speak.

“I understand your frustration with everyone but please don’t insist on the festival with him ok? He said he didn’t want to, let’s respect his wish.” Myungsoo pleaded but he seemed sad with his own words.

Sunggyu pursed his lips and frowned. As much as he wanted Myungsoo and his brother to makeup, he wanted the adult in front of him to make up with his friend as well. So not insisting didn’t feel right. Even so, Sungyeol had taught him different strategies, sometimes he needed to retreat a bit before advancing and this was what he intended to do.

"Hyung, just come to the festival anyway ok?" He pleaded.