Myungsoo came out from Sungyeol office fuming, stomping his feet and simply blind by his anger. How dare Sungyeol say he didn’t have balls? And if by the way, he wanted to continue their relationship while Sungyeol didn’t count for anything, he had more balls than Sungyeol and a simple lack of answer wouldn’t make him ball-less. He was so blind by anger that he only stopped when he bumped with a guy while he was on his way down the stairs.

The books splashed everywhere and Myungsoo groaned, he picked the books with the help of the guy and two other hands that he didn’t see, but once the guy was about to hand him the books and prepared to scold him they recognized each other. It turns out his friend and sunbae Minseok were rekindling the flames with his past girlfriend and that’s why he came to drop her by. In any other situation, he would have been happy to meet his friend again and catch up a little, but he was late to meet and angry.

After dodging questions about the bag and the pile of books he was holding, Myungsoo briefly told his friend the only two big things it was worth mentioning now: he had moved to Seoul and he was late. He thought that his friend would try to convince him to go out to catch up another time but instead, the guy revealed he moved out of his parent's house and that Myungsoo apartment was on his way so he offered a ride. Myungsoo didn’t want to talk to his friend in this state but ended up accepting the ride because he was late. At least surviving that ride with his friend wouldn’t hurt his pride more than Sungyeol already did, right?

Myungsoo congratulated himself for the genius idea of telling his parents to call to inform him they left home because that gave him plenty of time to come back home and finish packing some allergy med’s for Woohyun, he didn’t know which hotel his family would be staying and Woohyun had a tricky nose.

He placed Woohyun small travel bag beside Sunggyu’s on the couch and then placed the box with Sungyeol mother letters beside it to not forget to give his back to his mother then went for a shower to cool his head.

When he came out from his bath it was time to do something useful while he waited. He did the dishes quickly, changed bed sheets and put some clothes on the washing machine, after that, he decided he didn’t have the mood to touch his project because that made him remember his fight with Sungyeol and that wasn’t helping him subside his anger, so he chose to work.

He started doing some cleaning on Hoya drafts but couldn’t concentrate so he decided to open his project and make some corrections Sungyeol suggested because it would be mechanical and he didn’t need to think too much. He started but couldn’t do much because his doorbell rang while a message arrived at his phone and that could only mean his parents arrived.

“Mom! Dad!” Myungsoo greeted and gave each of them half a hug before pulling both of them inside his apartment.

“How are you son?” “Will we be able to take Sunggyu too?” Both parents asked at the same time.

“I’m… okay.” Myungsoo forced a smile but there is so much anger he could hide from his parents. The two elders looked at each other warily as Myungsoo proceeded walking and talking ahead. “Here it is Woohyun bag and here it is Sunggyu bag and then you guys need to take the box of letters you forgot here last time.” He said and put the two bags in the ground to make room for his parents to sit.

“So you did really talk to him.” Bumsoo said as he and wife walked behind their son and stopped beside it.

“Unfortunately, but, for that, I sent a note.” Myungsoo said kinda proud of himself for the genius idea he had this morning.

“Did he give you some written permission to take Sunggyu? If he didn’t we can’t take him from school or even on the plane.” Sonmi asked as she sat beside her son.

“He said it is inside Sunggyu bag, but I didn’t open to check.” Myungsoo explained idly and Bumsoo started opening Sunggyu bag.

“Here it is.” He exclaimed once he found the paper. “Nice, we are going to be able to board with Sunggyu with this and… he wrote a list of things Sunggyu can’t eat/is allergic to. Nice thought!” He complimented as he examined the paper and Myungsoo snorted.

“Yeah, that would make things easier in the trip.” Sonmi agreed with her husband then turned to her son. “At least he knows how to separate stuff and will not prevent the boys from playing, right?”

“Yeah, ok, sure.” Myungsoo said with sarcasm.

Both parents exchanged again a worried look. “But that’s a good thing for Woohyun.” Bumsoo said.

“In a way.” Myungsoo agreed. “But if he thinks he will spend the same amount of time in the neighbors all over again, he is hugely mistaken.”

“Ok, what happened this time?” Bumsoo asked as he sat beside his wife.

“We fought.” Myungsoo confessed with a sigh.

“Why?” Sonmi asked interestedly.

“Because I provoked him.”

“What? Who are you and what you did to my son?” Myungsoo mother said flabbergasted and leaning away of her son to inspect him properly.

“There is so much I can take, I couldn’t contain myself.”

“I’m disappointed, son.” Bumsoo made a face of reproval. “I’m nowhere near siding with Sungyeol but, if you aren’t ready to have a heart to heart conversation with him about how you feel and how he hurt you, don’t keep picking up fights because it would only make you seem like a spoiled brat not to mention it will deteriorate your relationship with him even more.”

“And liking or not you need him, right? You only have to hang on a little bit over a month, you went through a lot of things in this past seven years and you lived everything with such grace... so be the mature one, for the time being, you need your graduation so you and Woohyun won’t delay your plans.”

Myungsoo leaned forward, rested his elbows on his knees and rubbed his hands on his face. “It is so difficult.”

“I know, Soo.” Sonmi said and started to pat his back. “But that has day and time to end, right? So roll up your leaves and work hard to finish your project and soon you won’t have to face Sungyeol anymore if you don’t want to.”

“Alright, alright. For Woohyun I will try harder.”Myungsoo agreed.

“That’s the spirit.” Sonmi cheered.

“Besides, if Sungyeol was assigned as your adviser and he is a genius, take advantage of his knowledge to make your project even better and for everything else, we are just a phone call away.” Bumsoo suggested.

“But he doesn’t let me move on with the project at all, he keeps on asking me to change details and...” Myungsoo whined. “...see those books?” He pointed to a corner where he previously placed them. “I have a match tomorrow but I have to read everything for Monday, can you believe it? I feel like I’m wasting my time, this is how well everything is going.”

“But you will manage, you always do.” Sonmi said patting his hair.

“I just hope he goes through with his promise to finish things before the deadline.” Myungsoo looked at his parents tiredly. “That way I can look for a job and try to tell Woohyun the truth and... Hey did you guys have any news on the guy?”

“Not really, whenever we have a good lead the guy disappears again. It seems like he can’t keep a job and runs away before people kick him out and then moves to a completely different city.” Sonmi explained.

“That’s good for us.” Bumsoo said encouragingly.

“Yes, it is.” Myungsoo agreed then continued. “I just don’t want any other crisis now, ok? I hid everything for too long so I have to approach Woohyun wisely about it so he is not left with some deep trauma. But I’ve decided to tell him before this year ends so, with a boyfriend or without a boyfriend, I will tell him after my graduation is done.”

“That will be so difficult for Woohyun to understand.” Sonmi sighed.

“Talking about him we got to go, Sonmi. We still need to go to Incheon, give him and Sunggyu a bath, dinner, and head for the airport.” Bumsoo urged as looked at his phone to check the time.

“Ok, just a second, I need to use the bathroom.” With that, the old woman raised from her spot and rushed towards her son bedroom while Myungsoo also raised from his spot to help his father carry the bags towards the door.

Bumsoo was older but there was one thing he and Myungsoo had in common was the love for sports/exercising so he was pretty fit for his age and that needed much effort to carry to kids luggage, still, Myungsoo followed behind him holding the box of letters of his mother.

“I don’t know how you have his number but don’t go calling him to talk about me ok?” Myungsoo said as he followed his dad.

Bumsoo snorted. “Can’t you trust your father? I only called him because Woohyun wanted Sunggyu company. If I need to talk to him it will be about Sunggyu only.”

“Ok, but call me when you get there, I want to talk to Woohyun before he goes to sleep.”

“Or else you’ll freak out.” Bumsoo giggled but after Myungsoo made an unamused face he schooled his expression. “I’ll keep you updated with some pictures so keep your phone close.” He instructed before getting impatient. “SONMI, ARE YOU DONE? WE WILL GET TRAPPED IN THE TRAFFIC.”

“JUST A SECOND.” Sonmi yelled back and after both father and son shook heads she came out running. “I didn’t know we were so late.” She got close to her son and he leaned down to gain a kiss from her. “Bye Soo, we will call you ok?”

Myungsoo was about to hand her the box with the letters but she insisted on grabbing Sunggyu bag with Bumsoo then one started urging the other and, in the end, they end up leaving and closing the door on Myungsoo face.

He looked down to his hands and gritted his teeth. “I’m not gonna read this.”

_________________________________________________

Hoya arrived in the apartment bringing a few bags with him, one with a few clothes and other with homemade food. He saw that Sungyeol was sitting on the couch and leaning over the coffee table, and he wondered if the taller was making some notes or reading something.

“Hey buddy, I came back and I brought my mom…” Hoya was greeting cheerfully but stopped in his tracks when he saw what Sungyeol was doing. Sungyeol was indeed leaning over the coffee table but he was taking chunks of paper, kneading them in tiny paper balls then throwing in the garbage bin with the help of a rubber band between two of his fingers. “What are you doing?”

“Trying a healthy way of letting frustrations go, do you want to help me?” He turned to Hoya and offered another rubber band.

“Just a second.” Hoya replied hesitantly and Sungyeol resumed his rudimental paper shooting as Hoya placed the food in the fridge and came back. “So how this works?”

Sungyeol gave a rubber band for his cousin and demonstrated. “You knead a paper, do it like this and then release the rubber. You have to aim in the garbage and if you get inside you gain a point.” Sungyeol pointed to the garbage bin with a few ball papers around then to a score he was keeping before kneading another paper ball and preparing to shoot it.

“You aren’t very good at this, are you?” Hoya asked as he pointed with his chin to the paper balls at the ground then shoot his first one that hit the garbage and fell outside.

Sungyeol finally shoot his and it went inside so he smiled to himself and marked another point for him. “Actually I’m almost a sniper by now, see?” He showed the score for Hoya and the oldest could easily count at least 50 squares and that meant 200 points or something.

“How long have you been playing this?” Hoya raised a brow.

“Two hours? I don’t know, but you took your time to come and I had to release stress someway so I did a quick search on youtube and voilá. If I had known this sooner I would have shot some bullies eyes.” Sungyeol said as he put the score down and prepared another ball to shoot. “Want to compete?” He asked as another paper ball of his went inside.

“My mom wanted to see me, and inquire me about you.” He defended himself then grabbed a few pages to himself. “Best of ten wins.” Hoya agreed as he started to cut paper and make some paper balls.

Sungyeol pulled the paper for himself and made a new score: a column for his points and a column for Hoya’s. “Ok, I’ll give you an advantage since I mastered this already, I’ll shoot from behind the couch. What have you told her?” He said and started to move to his new position while carrying some pages to tear and make more paper balls.

“That I’m just keeping an eye and lending an ear and that you’re fine until now.” He made a pause then continued changing the subject. “So, this is relieving your stress?” Hoya tried to make up some conversations as both of them made their paper balls.

“Not really, but it is kinda fun. I think I’ll teach Sunggyu, Sungjong will die out of jealousy.”

“He definitely will.” Hoya giggled for a second as he thought about his younger cousin that would get jealous every time he discovered Sungyeol was not only growing close to Sunggyu but was becoming his preferred hyung. “What made you so stressed?” Hoya asked as he got a new sheet of paper to tear, he knew by then that those pages were printed but he didn’t bother to read what was written until he saw Myungsoo name on it and that made him gasp and turn to his cousin. “Why this has Myungsoo name on it?”

“It’s his project.” Sungyeol replied a bit sad but as if that wasn’t a big deal.

“What? Sungyeol! Why are you tearing Myungsoo project?”

“Don’t worry, this version has lot’s of mistakes and he will probably print another.” Hoya jaw hung low, he couldn’t believe Sungyeol was talking about Myungsoo project like that when, supposedly, he wanted to help. “He could do so much better if he just listened to me...” Sungyeol sighed. “...he is the smartest sports person I know if I don’t count you”

“Is that a compliment?” Hoya asked in confusion.

“It is.” Sungyeol confirmed without a second thought.

“Thank you.” Sungyeol stopped what he was doing to look at his cousin in confusion. It was a compliment on Myungsoo intellect, Sungyeol only knew three people that liked sports with a passion: Myungsoo and Hoya in the adult's category and Woohyun in the kid’s category, so he chose to let Hoya misinterpret him and went back into making paper balls.

Hoya also shrugged and kept making paper balls out of Myungsoo project, now without guilt. “Is that what is stressing you now? Him not listening to you?” The elder asked again after a few seconds in silence.

“It is not that he doesn’t listen.” Sungyeol disagreed as he finished his paper balls and kneeled behind the couch to position himself and wait for his cousin. “He resists and complains and that annoys me, I wanted him to be more objective during our meetings but I don’t think he will stop giving me hell.”

“You must have hurt him a lot then.” Hoya concluded then also positioned himself. “Go first.” He said and Sungyeol aimed, shoot and scored.

“Write down my point.” Sungyeol pointed to the score in a piece of paper he left behind and Hoya did what he was told while Sungyeol continued. “Every time we sort of fight, it’s just... this time…”

Hoya took his time, aimed well, shot and scored. “This time…” He urged Sungyeol to continue.

“This time he accused me of wanting to get rid of him.” Sungyeol shot but the paper didn’t enter the bin this time. “Can you believe it?” He huffed.

“Huh?” Hoya stopped to make a confused face and Sungyeol shrugged to so Hoya aimed and shot as he thought. “But wasn’t your goal to go back together once he finishes his graduation?” Another point for Hoya.

“Yes.” Sungyeol agreed as if that was obvious for everyone in this world but he aimed and shot as he thought a bit. “Maybe I wasn’t clear enough about that.” His paper fell outside the bin again.

“What? You were so sure and using so many analogies I thought you had told him properly.” Again Hoya made another point.

“I told him.” Sungyeol insisted but Hoya scratched his head in confusion as he tried to figure out what to say. “Maybe not in the most direct way.” Sungyeol conceded as he aimed and this time shot properly.

“A-ha, that’s it.” Hoya snapped his fingers as if he just had an epiphany then aimed and scored again.

“But that can’t be all since he does not believe me.” Sungyeol argued. “You said yourself that when you talked to him he said we don’t feel the same way.” Sungyeol tried to shoot but once again missed his target.

“Have you ever thought about the possibility that Myungsoo was already feeling like that and when you said you had to break up he thought it was like a confirmation?” Hoya asked as he concentrated and a few seconds later his paper ball fell inside the bin.

Sungyeol, that had been aiming, retreated then got up to circle the couch and site beside Hoya. “I’ve considered but I can’t pinpoint what I was doing wrong, I mean, you know I give my everything when I’m in a relationship.”

Hoya nodded. “Well, you do try. But succeeding can be another thing.”

Sungyeol leaned on the backrest and looked pensively to the ceiling. “You are right. This is why I can’t be sure. There is one thing I can think about it but I don’t want to believe it is that because for me it is really, really nothing.”

“What?” Hoya asked interested and Sungyeol half glared at him.

“That’s intimate stuff.”

Hoya made a horrified face. “One of you didn’t…”

“Hey!” Sungyeol complained and slapped his cousin in the knee.

“It happens ok? But it shouldn’t be the end of the word.” Hoya defended himself as he rubbed his knee.

“It was nothing like that, .”

“Then?”

“Then I’ll never have the means to know because he is used to keeping things for himself, if he had even a complaint I’ll never know because he wouldn’t bring himself to talk about it.” Sungyeol said frustratedly. “He is shy about talking certain topics.”

“Then you have no other alternative than taking that info out by force when you two talk properly about you two.” Hoya concluded and Sungyeol looked at him with a kicked puppy face.

“That’s harassment, I can’t do that, remember?”

“Then you just have to take it until this ends and ask because if he doesn’t have the courage to talk about it and you have but you’re never clear you two will never understand each other. This is why Dongwoo hyung and I talk a lot because we both thought the would make us have different interpretations of things.” Hoya concluded as he leaned his back on the couch as well and started thinking about every time he and Dongwoo had these kinds of talks, he then sighed. “I miss him.”

“Then go see him.” Sungyeol suggested as he looked at his cousin.

“No, I’m resisting his tempting offers.” Hoya said proud of himself but received a slap in his stomach as a scolding.

“Just go see your boyfriend while you have one.” Sungyeol said in annoyance. “I want to be alone too, so I can reevaluate things since I met him and not only about the break up only.” Sungyeol then looked ahead.”

“But that would leave you alone.” Hoya said clearly tempted but also concerned.

Sungyeol wanted to retort because Hoya was helpful but he was becoming overbearing in his care for some time now but before, he could, his phone rang up so he grabbed from the coffee table and took the call.

“Hello?” As soon as he said that Hoya snapped his fingers together because he had an idea, so he grabbed his own phone to make a phone call.

“Hello, Sungyeol? This is Sonmi, Myungsoo’s mother, I hope you’re not busy.”

“Hi, mam. No, I’m not.” Sungyeol greeted. “Did you had any trouble with Sunggyu flight permission? I left in the front pocket of his bag.”

“Oh, no, he is fine, he is fine.” The lady assured but then became worried. “It’s just, we are on our way to board the plane now and Sunggyu seems a little antsy but Woohyun can’t distract him so I was wondering if you can talk to him to calm him down?”

“No problem, put him on the phone, please.” Sungyeol instructed while Hoya decided to come to his front and snap some fingers in front of his face to get his attention.

“Hyung?” Sunggyu voice was heard on the phone while Sungyeol watched his cousin do some mimic and he didn't understand anything.

“Hi Gyu, I heard that you are being nervous, why is that now?” Sungyeol asked but then made an annoyed face and tried to shoo Hoya with his hands. “I thought you’d be excited as this morning to finally go on a trip with your friend.”

“I just...I thought Jeju was near Incheon but we have to take a plane to arrive there…” Sunggyu replied uneasily as Hoya kept trying to mimic something in front of Sungyeol. 

“I thought you wouldn’t have a problem with that because you always followed your rock star dad around, no?”

“I did… by car… with mom.” He said and Sungyeol could only curse in his mind, he was already regretting giving Sunggyu permission to go without checking with the boy if he had any trouble with that kind of locomotion. At least Hoya wasn't practically dancing in front of him and was off to the side so he could concentrate on his brother properly.

“I’m sorry I didn’t know that. Hyung still has a lot to learn about you and from you so forgive hyung for that.” He said in the softest tone he could muster.

“Eung.” Sunggyu agreed but then spoke nervously again. "Is... is it safe?"

“It is completely safe Sunggyu, don’t worry about a thing, your flight is a little bit over than an hour so you’ll get up and down really fast. Besides the weather in Incheon and Jeju is clear, I checked, so there won’t be any turbulence .”

“What if I don’t like or... or get scared?” The boy asked.

“Sunggyu, it really isn’t that scary. Just remember to always keep the belt, unless you need to go to the bathroom, chew some gums so your ear doesn’t hurt and if you really really scared, ask to hold Woohyun hand, or Myungsoo’s parent’s hand, that will make you feel safer. But I’m sure a big boy like you won’t have a problem at all, then we can boast to everyone how brave you were, wouldn’t that be nice?”

“Yeah…” Sunggyu seemed  to brighten up a bit and that's when Hoya decided to hold him, pointed to himself then to the door, then point to Sungyeol and show his phone to the taller's face. Sungyeol had not a chance to interpret, not because the mimic was complex this time but because of what Sunggyu said next. "What about you? Will you be ok?"

Sungyeol managed a thumbs up that seemed to please Hoya before he answered his brother. “ I’m gonna be fine, nothing is gonna happen to me. I’ll try to get rid of Hoya but don’t think I will leave the apartment this weekend, maybe I will call Sungjong and complain about how I’ll be missing you. And, damn, Gyu, now that we got close I miss you.” He confessed.

“I miss you too.” The boy said but Sungyeol heard someone urging someone else so he tried to wrap it up.

“What if you call me after you land so you can tell me how the flight was?” He suggested. “Maybe when you’re about to return I can pick you up in the airport and we can go out for milkshakes too, you’re doing so good, you deserve a treat and maybe later I can tell you and Woohyun about this new game I learned and that I want to teach you too.”

“Really? Awesome!” Some more words were heard in the background and now Sunggyu was the one wrapping up. "I'll call you later then. "Thank you for letting me come, hyung, I love you and sorry for being scared of silly things."

“You have nothing to be sorry about, now just go board your plane and have lots of fun in Jeju ok?”

“Ok. Byee” Sunggyu ended the call in a cheerful note and Sungyeol felt proud that he was able to make the boy feel better.

He smiled to himself when he thought about trying not to show his jealousy and then his smile became sad when he thought that it was Myungsoo that gave him lots of tips to improve and he couldn’t even thank him for that because they weren’t in a good place now.

Thinking about Myungsoo made Sungyeol remember that he had been discussing the recent developments with Hoya and that that crazy hyung had been trying to mimic something to him but he couldn’t understand. He turned around searching for his cousin but Hoya was nowhere to be found so he checked the phone to see what Hoya meant and surely there was a message from his cousin on his Kakao Talk.

Sungyeol was about to get happy that Hoya was finally leaving him alone when he read the rest of the message.

Went to see Dongwoo hyung, but Sungjong agreed to come and stay with you.

There is food in the fridge.

He groaned.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Aside from the pile of books Myungsoo had to read, he had to agree that it wasn’t so troublesome go over Sungyeol other suggestions, he ended up before dinner. At this point, the clothes on his washing machine were removed and placed on a pile with others that had been waiting and that he decided to iron now because if he let to do this on the weekend he would interrupt the flow of whatever he decided to do so he prepared the coffee table and started ironing.

When Myungsoo had already ironed most of their piled clothes and there were only a few sheets left to iron his phone rang with a call from his father. He found that weird since he thought his father would only call before bedtime so he turned the iron off and promptly picked up the call.

“Hello? Dad?”

“Daddy, it’s me!” Woohyun bright voice came from the other side and Myungsoo sighed with relief, at last nothing had happened to his son.

“Namu, I thought you’d be boarding now.” He checked the clock on his laptop that was long forgotten on his couch.

“We are about to but Gyu hyung is scared so we are waiting for him to calm down.” Woohyun dutifully informed. 

“OH, and Sunggyu is scared of flights?”

“He said he never traveled in a plane, can you believe that? And he thought Jeju was near Incheon kekekekeke.” The boy dissolved himself in giggles.

“Woohyun-ah, don’t laugh, it’s not ok laughing of others fears, especially our friends. You should be comforting Sunggyu and not laughing.” Myungsoo scolded.

“I’m sorry.” The boy said guiltily then started to defend himself. "I tried to tell him what uncle Moonsoo said: that it was just like a boring roller coaster and that everything got tiny from the sky but he kept being nervous so grandma decided to call Sungyeol hyung to calm him down when I asked to talk to you."

Myungsoo eye twitched when his son said the name of his ex-lover-now-nemesis but he didn’t think Woohyun wanted to annoy him this time so he gathered his thoughts, breathed deeply and replied.

“Are you missing me already?” He asked.

“I wish you could come with us.” The boy confessed. “It would be so much more fun.”

“Sorry, but I can’t champs.” Myungsoo said as he glanced at the pile of books Sungyeol asked him to read. “I have a match tomorrow and I have to do my project too, if I rush a bit this weekend then I will be able to spend more time with you later.”

“It’s ok.” Woohyun said but Myungsoo just knew Woohyun was sad about that. “It’s just… you’ll be all alone there.”

“I’ll be fine Namu, I need to focus a bit anyway.” Myungsoo giggled.

“Can’t you make up with Sungyeol hyung so you won’t stay alone?”

“Woohyun…” He said in a warning tone as he pinched the bridge of his nose to alleviate stress.

“Woohyun, enough give me back my phone.”Myungsoo could hear his father asking. 

“No, I’m still talking to daddy." Woohyun said out of the phone then continued talking. "Everybody is saying that Sungyeol hyung is supposed to help you with your project, but how can he help you if are fighting?" 

“Woohyun, please, let’s not talk about that..” Myungsoo pleaded.

“Woohyun, come back here, Sunggyu is finishing, we have to board.”

“Daddy, grandpa says we got to go, can we continue talking before bedtime?” Woohyun asked and it seemed like he was fighting someone to keep the phone on his hands.

“Yes, you can ask grandpa to call me anytime. Let’s not talk about that anymore and just go enjoy Jeju, Don't forget to show Sunggyu all the good places you already know ok?”

“But, daddy..”

“Woohyun, we need to go.” Bumsoo was heard and the boy sighed.

“Bye daddy.” Woohyun said with a dejected tone.

“Bye Namu.” Myungsoo turned off the phone and placed on the couch before he sighed and his eyes roamed his living room aimlessly until they stopped in the box of letters left in his apartment. He gritted his teeth and groaned. “I’m not gonna to read that, I’m not gonna to read that, I’m not gonna to read that, I’m not gonna to read that!” He chanted as he got up, grabbed the box, walked towards Woohyun room and left the box there. “I’m not gonna to read that” He said one more time as he closed the door.

____________________________________________________________________

“You troublemaker!” Bumsoo huffed as Woohyun looked at him kinda confused. “Your father has to concentrate on his project, besides pressuring him to talk to Sungyeol won’t make things better, it will only make him want to ground you, do you want to get grounded?”

Woohyun made big surprised eyes and blinked his eyes as much as he could. If that wasn’t enough to make Bumsoo heart squeeze already, Sonmi and Sunggyu turned to them. “Come on, don’t make that face.” Bumsoo urged as he poked his grandson shoulders. “Don’t make grandpa feel bad, I didn’t mean to be mean to you.”

“We are ready.” She said and motioned for them to get to the line to go towards the airplane.“What is happening?” She asked once Bumsoo came closer with Woohyun and saw his expression.

“Woohyun told Myungsoo to make up with Sungyeol again.” Bumsoo briefly explained and this time the boy giggled sheepishly.

“I miss Sungyeol hyung, he is a nice person now. And daddy has been so sad since he and Sungyeol fought, but he still doesn’t want to make up so he is being dumb.”

“Right…” Sonmi said awkwardly, despite wanting the together Sonmi was supporting her son 100% so she didn’t exactly thought Sungyeol was being the nicest person.

“I know.” Sunggyu agreed with his friend. “Sungyeol hyung was so sad that he cried and then Hoya hyung became really worried and moved in with us so Sungyeol hyung has been sleeping in my room.” Both elders looked at each other. “He gets even sadder whenever he meets Myungsoo hyung. I know because he and Hoya hyung always spend like an hour whispering and then Sungyeol hyung starts to pretend everything is ok but later at night I hear him crying.” Sunggyu said as he entered the plane. “Hi.” He greeted the flight attendant that smiled at him while Woohyun waved at her.

“Look for row six.” Bumsoo instructed more to make the boys change the subject because it wouldn’t be too hard to find since most of the airplane was full by now.

“Six, six, six…” Woohyun chanted then pointed to a row. “Over there, hyung, last’s there is a monkey uncle!” Woohyun said and started running and Sunggyu ran too but it wasn’t like he was ever going to outstrip his friend in a tiny space like that.

“Don’t race each other.” Sonmi complained as she tried to follow the boys but they both entered the correct row. “Now sit down and put the seat belt.” She instructed as Bumsoo made himself comfortable in the only vacant seat on the other side.

“How do I…?” Sunggyu inspected the seat belt and discovered it was different from the ones his brother had in his car.

“Like this.” Woohyun said and put the two pieces together for him and then put his.

“Now we adjust it like that.” Sonmi said as she adjusted both seat belts. “You two already went to the bathroom so you can’t take this off before we arrive in Jeju ok?” Both boys nodded and she sat and connected her own seat belt.

“Look hyung, there is a plane taking flight over there.” Woohyun pointed to the small window and Sunggyu tried his best to observe.

“Wow.” He said and then Sonmi asked them to make silence and pay attention because the flight crew was about to start instructions.

After they were done, they walked to their positions and soon after the plane started to move and that’s when Sunggyu started to become nervous all over again.

“Are you nervous again Sunggyu?” Sonmi asked from his left side and that made Woohyun turn his head to him in concern too.

“No, I’m not.” He denied but Sonmi could see that he was a bit.

“Just hold my hand hyung!” Woohyun suggested and both boys held each other hands. “Sunggyu hyung fighting.”

“Fighting.” Sunggyu said nervously then turned to Sonmi. “Grandma, can I have some bubble gum? Hyung said I should chew some”

“Oh, right, oppa, their bubble gums.” Sonmi urged and Bumsoo patted his pockets until he found it and passed to his wife, that gave each boy one. “Keep chewing so your ear won’t hurt, ok?”

OK, Sunggyu could do that, right? He just needed to chew so his ear wouldn’t hurt so he decided to forget the world and concentrate.

When the plane finally took off, Sunggyu immediately closed his small eyes and he couldn’t help but grit his teeth. He felt his belly get cold and an adrenaline rush and while he clung in the armrest with his nails like a cat he also held Woohyun hand with some strength which made the younger boy wince.

“It’s ok, Sunggyu, you’re safe, there is no need to cling like that.” Sonmi said and slowly she was able to make Sunggyu let go and decrease the strength he was using in the poor younger boy hands. “See, we are already in the air.” She pointed to the window as Woohyun inspected his hand. “You guys are ok?” She asked.

“Yes.” Woohyun said as he shook his hand (and half of his body) to alleviate the pain and at that moment his bubble gum fell on his lap. “EWW.”

“It was really a not big thing.” Sunggyu concluded and closed his arms then started chewing again.

“Put this one on the garbage, it is the plastic bag there.” Sonmi instructed and Woohyun slowly took it, while making a face and place the bubble gum there.

“Flying is pretty cool after all.” Sunggyu said, with no trace of his previous nervousness.

“It is…” Woohyun was about to agree with a smile when he stopped in his tracks and made a face of pain. He promptly put his little hands over his ears. “AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

__________________________________________________________________

Sungyeol trusted his aunt more than his mother (when she was alive) to make his favorite food and tonight she didn’t disappoint him. Actually, she never disappointed him even though he got his scolded by her a couple of times, especially when he made Hoya cry in the beginning.

He heated the food Hoya brought him and ate alone, but despite being tired of Hoya’s presence Sungyeol didn’t enjoy the solitude he thought he was needing. Yes, he lived a lot of time alone but after his mother died he was able to rediscover his family, Hoya and Sungjong dropped by often and Sunggyu was always there; and there were even Myungsoo and Woohyun whose presence he missed. He missed having his house full of people.

Once he finished washing the dishes, he decided to finally clean all the paper balls in his living room then went for a bath, only to shriek once he came out and found Sungjong sitting comfortably in his bed.

“What are you doing sitting like a statue? Do you want to give me a heart attack?” Sungyeol asked as he passed his brother to the closet to get a few clothes with his hand over his heart and a tight hold on his towel. “Don’t tell me you came to steal my bed too.”

Sungjong giggled and did the favor to look to the other side of the room to give his brother some privacy. “Not in a permanent way.”

“Thank god, how were you even able to sleep? That bed is weird.” Sungyeol complained and Sungjong wanted to laugh.

“It never bothered me before.” Sungjong said as his brother dressed his underwear and some comfy shorts. “Besides, I knew I would be living in a college dorm so what was the use in complaining?

“You’re right.” Sungyeol put a shirt and then closed his closet doors. “I’m done, you can look now.”

Sungjong promptly turned and watched Sungyeol climb on his bed to sit beside him. “How are you doing hyung?”

“I’m not at my best but I’m not in my worst …. And I’m kinda lost.” Sungyeol answered sincerely.

“I told Hoya hyung that I didn’t think it was necessary keeping that close watch on you, but he dramatizes everything and insisted. I’m even surprised he asked me to come since he was so keen on not letting you escape his eyes.”

Sungyeol sighed. “It is because I attempted once. He was the one that found me, if he wasn’t for him I wouldn’t be here today, so I can’t bring myself to kick him out properly and have him freaking out even more.”

The youngest nodded to say he understood then raised a curious brow. “And why he left today?”

“Wanted to see Dongwoo hyung.” Sungyeol said as he made a mischievous smile that he tried to not make too obvious. “Dongwoo hyung was missing him so we made this plan...and, whatever message he sent, let’s just say Hoya hyung got too tempted to let the opportunity pass and just left while I was talking to Sunggyu on the phone.”

“And how Gyu is doing? Has he arrived in Jeju already?”

“They should be about to land, but, Jong, why didn’t you tell me it was Sunggyu first time on a plane? The poor boy was scared to go inside the plane.” Sungyeol asked as he gave his middle brother a shove when he smiled in a teasing manner.

“Because it wasn’t his first time?” Sungjong said as he massaged his arm. “He probably just doesn’t remember, he was a tiny baby when mom traveled with him on a plane.”

“In this case, you’re excused.”

“Well, thank you. Were you able to convince him to go inside?”

“Yes, and if he brags about how brave he was just go along ok?” Sungyeol said then sighed tiredly. “How you’re doing?”

“Well, college life is busy, there is assignments, groups of studies, papers I want to publish with this professor…” Sungjong counted in his fingers.

“Wow, I’m proud you’re so busy but what about Moonsoo?” Sungyeol asked and Sungjong sighed.

“Let’s not talk about him, he is being an withholding secrets that can help you from me, so we are in a weird phase.” Sungjong said impatiently.

Sungyeol nodded as if he was already expecting something like that. “I don’t think I can advise you that well but here it goes: they are a tight-knit family and I don’t think Moonsoo would change his loyalties, so don’t push him and just have fun.”

The younger blinked in surprise with Sungyeol advice then smiled mischievously. “You’re another person, now you’re even giving advice I can really use.”

“YAh!” Sungyeol tried to grab a pillow to hit Sungjong sides, but he did it without much force.

“Hihi, stop it.” Sungjong pleased and the elder promptly conceded. “I like this new you.”

“Thank you, I hope I can keep up with your expectations from now on.” Sungyeol said, feeling pleased that at least he was being appreciated by his family.

“So how about Myungsoo hyung? Are you having any luck?”

Sungyeol stopped his pleased expression to glare at his brother. “Luck?” He rolled his eyes. “If Myungsoo could mince my body and throw to the dogs without going to jail and losing Woohyun guard in the process, I think he would already have done. Every time I meet him is a nightmare.”

“Hoya hyung said he was giving you trouble, but he didn’t say it was that bad.”

“Stop talking about me behind my back.” Sungyeol complained, then poked a finger on Sungjong forehead. “It is bad and I’m frustrated.” Sungyeol confessed.

“ I bet Hoya hyung already offered but do you want to talk about it?” The younger offered.

Sungyeol stayed a minute in silence in which Sungjong though no words would come out. “You and Hoya are very different, but do you know what is the difference I like the most?”

“He is easier to pick on?” Sungjong suggested thinking Sungyeol was changing the subject.

“Well, that is a funny difference, but I think you side with what you think is fair, Hoya takes sides based on who he likes the most.” Sungjong stopped and looked at Sungjong. “He gave me some useful insights but I think you’d be the one that perhaps might help me more.”

“Then why you didn’t call me to ask for help?”

“You know I rarely do that on my own, but this time I wanted to think things and try to figure out things on my own but…” He frowned. “I’m not very lucky so far.”

“You’re not used to discovering these kinds of things on your own, it took me a lot of time nagging on how that ty guy wasn’t for you and still you only believed me when you saw.” Sungjong said as he picked up a pillow to cuddle with.

Sungyeol forced a smile but his eyes looked sad. “You’re right.”

“Then? I’m all ears if you want to say anything.”

“I made all this strategy to get out of this situation, minimizing our losses, right?” He said and Sungjong nodded as he was aware of his brother intentions. “When we talked about this decision I said this was one of those situations where we let go something to guarantee the other and that Woohyun was his priority and that he should do what is best for him. So when Hoya says I have hurt him without knowing I think it is because I said that.”

Sungjong jaw hung low. “You told him that?” Sungyeol nodded. “It is no wonder why Myungsoo hyung is extremely pissed at you when with that you practically said that you considered your relationship the most insignificant thing for you both.”

Sungyeol thought a bit, finding some sense in Sungjong words. “But I didn’t say that.”

“No what do you said then?” Sungjong crossed his arms over the pillow and lifted a brow, daring Sungyeol to say anything.

“That I recognize that Woohyun is above me in his list of priorities.” The taller said as if it was obvious. “And that he is so important for me that guaranteeing his future is also a priority for me.” Sungyeol said proud of himself and his brother raised a hand to make him stop talking.

“Ok, I can see your point, but Myungsoo hyung definitely didn’t interpret that way.”

“I know.” Sungyeol agreed with a nod then looked down his lap and fiddled with his fingers. “ This thing I told him, I told him that before. ” He confessed and that made Sungjong have some hope. “Maybe I was expecting he would remember our past conversation, maybe that was why I wasn’t very clear when I explained the strategy I came up with.”

“So there is more context?” Sungjong straightened himself in the bed interested. “Tell me everything, so we can make a plan on how to solve this.” The youngest demanded and Sungyeol adjusted himself in the bed before talking, but not daring to look at Sungjong in the eyes.

“I don’t know if Hoya hyung shared this with you, but remember that weekend Moonsoo came out to his parents and Myungsoo told me in the wee hours that he had an interest in me?”

“You were so cute asking for advice to please each other, oh my god to think I was part of that special moment.” Sungjong giggled pleased.

Sungyeol chose not to comment on what his brother said and just continued. “I don’t exactly remember telling you everything about that conversation but I told Hoya and Dongwoo hyungs so they could advise me and… I don’t think Hoya hyung remembers too…” He paused to sigh while his brother waited eagerly. “Everything between Myungsoo and I started happening when he had this dream with something he wanted but he ended up losing the person that he loves the most and then asked me something like ‘what if something that you want, clash with something that it is also precious for you?’?”

“What you said back then?” Sungjong asked.

“That I tried to get both. And then he asked me what I would do if I had to choose and that’s when I told him, in other words, that I would let go of one thing to guarantee the other, but I also said that it didn’t mean I wouldn’t try to get the thing I let go, and that I would just try to get one at time.”

“Then your actions till there make sense, though I also think you couldn’t expect Myungsoo hyung to remember that kind of conversation when he was in that kind of situation.”

“You’re right.” Sungyeol conceded.

“Of course I am, what else?”

“I think it is because he doesn’t remember that that he told Hoya hyung that we don’t have the same feelings and treats me as if what we are doing is not a sacrifice, as if I am not putting his future as my priority, as if I don’t love him and last time I saw him he even asked me if I was eager to get rid of him just because I told him we would do our best to finish before the deadline. Can you believe that? That hurt.”

“What did you do when he said that?”

“That I did want to get out of this situation but that it wasn’t because what he was thinking.”

Sungjong slapped his forehead and took a deep breath, clearly done with his brother, before asked. “Ok, but did you explain that?”

“I tried. I tried to make him question himself as to why I investing so much in his project, I even said that pumping my curriculum was not the answer and only a side effect, but we were in college and I am his adviser. Not only that, our fight was becoming heated, anyone could listen and, if anyone connects the dots, people might think I am harassing him. Hell, he is so pissed that I’m afraid he can claim that anytime.” Sungyeol explained frustrated and Sungjong put the hand in his chin to think while Sungyeol continued. “How can I be clear and direct if that can happen? I someone even dreams about that we are both, differently but equally screwed.”

“While you’re right, I don’t think Myungsoo hyung will screw his only chance to get his diploma in this semester. He won’t tell anyone that you’re harassing him.”

“I am not harassing him, I’m giving him every inch of space I can and I only talk to him in our meetings and… I only talked about us because he was the one that brought it up.” Sungyeol said desperately to be believed.

“I believe you hyung, I do. You’re not harassing him, I know and he knows too. Moonsoo hyung hadn’t spilled much but as far as I know, all his family is not treating this kind of situation as harassment either so he probably won’t go around claiming that.”

“But if I keep trying to talk to him about us it will be harassment.” Sungyeol insisted. “And I just want to help him to get this out of his way but he keeps giving me hell.”

“He is probably only doing that because it is his only way to vent his frustration and somehow give you some payback.” Sungjong suggested.

“I thought about that, still it doesn’t seem right.” Sungyeol insisted.

“Is there anything more?” Sungjong asked appalled.

“Yes, though I’m trying to force myself not to think about those things and that they’re only my imagination and everything that is happening is because of what I told you till here.”

“Spill.”

“It’s intimate stuff.” Sungyeol said as he said to Hoya a few hours prior.

Sungjong rolled his eyes. “Are you really going to hide information when I’m trying to help you? Come on, hyung, spill before I knock on the door across and get beaten because I tried to get the information from him. I promise Myungsoo will never know you told me which position you prefer.”

“It is not that kind of intimate stuff.” The elder protested as he blushed faintly.

“Then why are you scared to tell me?” Sungjong dared his brother to answer.

“I’m not scared to tell you.” Sungyeol insisted and Sungjong answer to that was trying to get up from the bed but he was quickly tackled down. “It is just a bit embarrassing.”

“Spill hyung, I’m not gonna tell anyone what you confide in me today.” Sungjong said as he pushed Sungyeol back.

“OK. Ok.” Sungyeol said and took a deep breath before explaining. “You know I have more experience...

I think Myungsoo is bothered by that since before.”

Sungjong frowned. “But half your ual experience doesn’t count because it came from ual harassment, you two never talked about these kinds of things? I could swear Hoya hyung told me you told him everything about yourself.”

“I did.” Sungyeol interjected. “He knows about that, he knows that I had a lot of failed relationships before too. But he only focused on Woohyun before me and then he has an avalanche of problems too... I hope to be wrong because I really don’t care about that, but there is this voice in my head telling me that these things made Myungsoo insecure, but I don’t have any proof that supports this train of thought because Myungsoo isn’t comfortable talking about these kinds of things so I will never know.” The elder explained frustratedly.

“The voice in your head might be a genius too.” Sungjong blinked but was shoved by the taller so he took this seriously. “But you’re right, you don’t have proof but if this could be confirmed it can change the way you should talk this out with him. But hyung, what led you to be suspicious of that?”

“I don’t know, once we were talking about past experiences and he was really shy about it when he was telling him, he was shocked when I said the number of people I tried to have a relationship with. Then despite telling him over and over how much my feelings for him are intense, he doesn’t believe because I told him that I got bored with the majority of my boyfriends so he might think I was bored with him and was eager to get rid of him…. I don’t know…. Once, in bed, he said he knew he wasn’t what I was used to, then there at the beginning he was pretty insecure and afraid to disappoint me and once he apologized because his problems were consuming him too.”

“You say you don’t have proof but here you have a bunch. Myungsoo hyung was insecure.” Sungjong concluded with a smile but stopped it not a second later. “I don’t think this is something to be happy about it.”

“But I don’t mind any of that and Myungsoo is so out of my league too, this is why I can’t believe he was insecure, I should be the one insecure. Besides, I don’t really mind anything, really, if he needs to be taught, I teach with the utmost pleasure.”

Sungjong raised his hand to stop his brother while he pinched the bridge of his nose to alleviate stress. “Let’s stop your speech here before this conversation becomes dubious.” He then looked at his brother to say what he had in mind. “Look, with insecurity or not I believe that if you play your cards right you can turn this game around.”

“Really?” Sungyeol asked with some hope

“Yes, but what you just told me it is something to be considered, and that can determine the route you will take.”

“Do you have any plan? Hoya says if he wants to keep Myungsoo as his assistant he can’t talk about me, so I can’t get help from him, and Dongwoo hyung... I think he wants to pull off a Switzerland if there is a fight happening even if he supports us together, and I’m with hands tied with this advising thing.”

“Chill and hang on, there is this party next Saturday...”

“I don’t think Myungsoo will go to a party right now unless he is really crazy.” Sungyeol said in concern. “And how should I hang on when Myungsoo started to use his knowledge of intimate aspects of my life to try to provoke me?”

“Wow, that’s new, how that even happened?” Sungjong asked curiously.

“After I pressured Myungsoo to think about my feelings and he kept being silent, I said I was done for that day and that he should return to talk to me when he had the balls to go through that kind of conversation or if he finished the pile of books I gave him and then he was all sarcastic saying I should talk about having balls when I don’t have balls to read mom’s letters.”

“But you can change that easily. We have a shared file all about that.” Sungjong said very matter of fact.

“I know but not it is not the best time…” Sungyeol said with a sigh.

“No, hyung, that is the best time ever.” as the teller looked at him weirdly Sungjong pushed the pillow in his lap aside and sat on his knees. “There is this party on Saturday that I might be able to discover if this assumption about Myungsoo insecurity is correct, so you don’t confront Myungsoo hyung before we are sure which road to take. And while I’m fighting on another front, you read mom’s letters.”

“What reading mom’s letters help me with Myungsoo?”

Sungjong just smiled as if he was waiting to be asked that. “One: If you get sad about it, his provocations won’t succeed, it is like you’re blinding yourself. Two: if he sees you demonstrating your feelings maybe his heart will melt a bit and then your chances to talk will increase.” The younger counted in his fingers.

“I don’t know.” Sungyeol said hesitantly but Sungjong was already jumping from the bed to use Sungyeol laptop.

“Come on, it will be great for you to finally have some answers too and I’ll be here all the way to make sure you’re ok and that you read it.” Sungjong urged as he tapped the password.

Sungyeol sighed deeply but could only get up to go to get the stool from his keyboard and bring besides the chair Sungjong was using and side hug him. “Thank you for everything Jong, this means a lot for me.”

Sungjong might of have not felt all warmed inside with his hyung accepting him as a valuable person that could help him.