Sunggyu didn't need to ask that, Myungsoo surely wouldn't miss Woohyun's festival even if the boy didn't take a more active role. It wasn't like he would stop being proud of his son because the boy chose to do something he wasn't expecting. No, he wanted to raise Woohyun differently from the way he was raised, so the boy wouldn't need to be afraid to be himself. 

What bothered him wasn't that Woohyun chose to do something else, foregoing the spotlight he was once craving, but the way the boy asked him not to come. Did Woohyun really want that? Did Woohyun really believe that he wanted that? Wouldn’t the boy feel disappointed if he didn’t attend? 

Myungsoo hadn't had these answers but he made some decisions. He wouldn't try to convince Woohyun to sing (and he hoped Sunggyu didn't annoy his son about it too) but he would attend that festival, and he would clap, praise, and be proud of whatever his boy did. This festival would be Woohyun's last day in school for this year anyway, after that, he would bring his son back home and work on mending their relationship during his break. It would be a slow process, he knew it, but things had been ok enough for him to improve some actions. He would probably try to get Hoya's advice on that later or when he was available.

A few minutes later, his parents sent a message to bring the boys down and he coaxed them out of Woohyun's room. Sunggyu still seemed more energetic than Woohyun, but they didn't seem particularly annoyed with each other so Myungsoo thought the young neighbor listened to him and didn't insist. He waved at the boys once his parents picked them up and then dragged his back to his apartment. Hoya was busy with his brother so he needed to get ahead with some things and then he had a lot of thinking to do.

Yes, Sunggyu didn’t insist on anything with Woohyun right away, but that didn’t mean he would give up easily. Once they were done with their Korean exam, and ready to have lunch, he tried to talk to his friend.

“Woohyunnie? Why did you say that?” He asked as he inspected Myungsoo's extra food for them. A mix of berries, he liked those. 

“What? When?” Woohyun asked in confusion and finally raised his eyes from the food he had been playing with to watch Sunggyu his lips and trying some berries. Woohyun sighed, he liked those mixed little fruits too but he had no appetite, his stomach felt a bit twisted.

“You know, during breakfast when Myungsoo hyung asked about the festival.”  The elder boy explained.

Woohyun released a long sigh and looked around to be sure other kids were far enough from them before he shrugged. “He isn’t really my father so he doesn’t have to come.”

“I guess you’re right.” Sunggyu chewed on his berries for a bit and then gulped before continuing. “What if he wants to come?”

“He can do whatever he wants.” Woohyun replied as if it wasn’t a big deal and returned his attention to the food.

Sunggyu shrugged in a non-committal way. “He is an adult so… yes, I guess. It’s just…” He stopped his words to think about the best way to say what he had in mind and Woohyun, who was finally bringing food to his mouth, put his chopsticks down to hear him. In the end, Sunggyu proceeded with a mix of disappointment and sadness in his tone “... it sounded like you didn’t want him to come at all, did you really… did you really mean that?” 

Sunggyu was waiting for Woohyun to snap, maybe fight him. He had prepared himself to use words to talk some sense into his friend until the younger was ready to push him again (which he wouldn’t let, Woohyun was tiny, and he could hold his friend this time). What he wasn’t expecting was to see the exact moment his friend unfocused his eyes, slightly opened his mouth, and entered thinking mode.

The younger immediately froze with that question. Hoya had warned him that he would feel many different things - true to that, he had been angry, upset, and extremely dislocated around everyone that he once was so comfortable with - and that he would say a lot of things to voice those feelings. Some would mean what they meant. Some would be regretted at some point. 

What Sunggyu was referring to… Woohyun hadn’t given much thought at the time so he hadn’t an answer. Even if he had no concrete answer to tell his friend right now, it made him question himself, did he really mean that?

A big part of him wanted to scream: YES, I MEANT THAT. Of course, this part wanted to say that, he was hurt, and disappointed, and he wanted to hurt Myungsoo as well. But another part of him - one that he was scared of knowing and one that seemed to want to grow bigger if given the opportunity - wanted to timidly (at least for now) say: no, I didn’t mean that.

At first, it was a given that Myungsoo would come to watch him. But that had stayed in the past when he had to pretend and lie and do things he didn’t want to do. When he got prejudice for being something that he wasn’t, a dad. Now that the secret was out he didn’t think Myungsoo needed to come. He didn’t need to lie or pretend and could do whatever he wanted. 

Once he thought Myungsoo was the best dad in the world and, aside from boasting about it, he did everything in his power to help him. Now that he discovered they weren’t like that, he thought the best thing for everyone would be to get out of Myungsoo's way. It was crushing for him, dislocating, to be alone, to be picked on if others discovered he was adopted, but he couldn’t help this thought that he had been burdening Myungsoo.

He knew the elder made a promise to his mom and both of them eventually would live together again, but when Sunggyu put things like that… would Myungsoo come even if it wasn’t part of his duties? Would he want to come even so? After being pushed away? Screamed to? Thought badly about? After being called things too? Would he willingly want to come?

He hadn’t given much thought to what he would feel if Myungsoo didn’t appear to watch him. Sure, he would be embarrassed, ashamed, and teased, if he boasted all year and was alone on the big day. But, it was ok, he could come up with a lie and pretend everything was fine. Myungsoo did that before, he could do it now. And Sunggyu would help, they were already sort of doing that. 

At the same time if he saw his friends with their families, even Sunggyu with his brothers... He shook his head and tried to shake certain thoughts from his head. Since he discovered the truth, he had been feeling lonely in a way he couldn’t explain but now… Now that Sunggyu asked him this and made him think, he could only guess he would probably feel worse. It would be like he would have confirmation of his scariest thoughts. That he would be utterly and completely alone in this world.

His stomach twisted a bit more and now he felt a heaviness - different from whatever he had been feeling in this past month - take over his heart. All in all, the only thing he could conclude at this right moment was that, despite everything, he still loved Myungsoo somehow. He still felt the need to ‘hit’ the elder back the same way, but now he felt really really bad for doing that.

He brought both hands on his face to try to hide the tears that wouldn’t take long to come. “Hyung, I don’t feel well.” He mumbled but his voice cracked when he spoke and that made Sunggyu forget whatever he had been trying to do before.

“What? Does it hurt anywhere?” He asked, instantly worried and with widened eyes, as he tried to inspect his friend. Sunggyu couldn’t find anything out of place in his friend’s body and Woohyun also didn’t let him check his face, so he had no idea of what was going on. “I’ll call Dongwoo hyung, wait right here.”

Sunggyu didn’t stay for an answer and used his recently built stamina to run around the school looking for his teacher. Finding Dongwoo was easy and the pink-haired man didn’t measure efforts to reach Woohyun as quickly as he could and bring him to the school's nurse. But it wasn’t easy putting a name on what Woohyun claimed he had. 

“He doesn’t have anything.” The nurse said after a quick exam.

“But he is saying his stomach hurts.” Dongwoo pointed worriedly and she turned to Sunggyu. 

“He ate the same as everyone else, right?” Sunggyu nodded. “And he didn’t touch the fruits he brought from home right?” Sunggyu shook his head and she turned to Dongwoo again. “He is not stuffed, it doesn’t hurt when I press, and his stomach is doing great.”

“What about his heart? He says it hurts.” Dongwoo tried again.

“There is nothing there that can be considered a problem.”

“It can’t be just nothing, he is super healthy,” Dongwoo complained.

"There is nothing I can do or anything I can medicate him with, there is nothing wrong in his body." The nurse insisted, which made Dongwoo blink and Sunggyu frown.

“Noona, are you calling Woohyunnie a liar?”

“That’s not what I’m saying,” She insisted then mumbled to herself. “What is Sunggyu still doing here?”

“What are you saying then?” The pink-haired teacher asked as Sunggyu stuck his tongue out to her back and then moved his attention back to his friend.

“What I am saying is that this problem might come from another place.” She said in a whisper tone.

“Like Sunggyu last year?” Dongwoo dropped his voice as low as he could too.

“Nope, it doesn’t look like what Sunggyu had last year. It's different and I’m not even sure if it’s a problem.” She used the same hushed tone and Dongwoo made a puzzled expression. “Like… if I say that my spirits are flying high I’m not saying my spirit can actually fly, but I’m saying I’m happy. What he described sounded like physical aspects of whatever he is feeling but he doesn’t realize it is his feelings.”

"What kind of feelings did he describe?"

"It might be fear or guilt, but I'm guessing, I'm not a specialist.”

Dongwoo scratched his head. “What do we do then?”

The nurse looked a bit at loss. “I doubt he will have the concentration for it but he is good enough to attend afternoon classes. Or you can inform his family? He skipped school a few days, right? If this is not the first time something like this happens, maybe they should try to find a child psychologist, I don’t know.”

Dongwoo turned to the children. “Should I call your dad Woohyun?”

The boy, who had been laying down on an exam bed with Sunggyu patting his head until now, gulped hard. He remembered Myungsoo saying that if he finished his exams early, he could ask Dongwoo to call his grandparents to pick him up. It was great to have permission to skip school if he didn’t feel like staying but if his grandparents were called they would fuss all over him, he didn’t want that.

Then he remembered Myungsoo saying that if his grandparents couldn’t appear he would, he would always be there for him. Woohyun sighed deeply, he didn’t want to see Myungsoo. Thinking about him made his heart squeeze even more and he knew he wouldn’t be able to look at him in the eyes.

“No, can I… can I just rest a bit? Maybe it will pass.” He asked and both adults in the room shared a look and had a mental debate over it. But then the school nurse sighed.

“I can look after him...” She relented.

“It’s gonna be fine Woohyunnie, I’ll stay with you until it passes.”

“Thank you.” Woohyun forced a smile and then turned to the other side, finding a better position to either take a nap or just cease interactions with the adults.

“... but Sunggyu has to go.” She added and Sunggyu turned to look at her with a betrayed look then threw begging eyes at Dongwoo.

“She is right Sunggyu, you need to go back to class.” He looked at the clock on the wall. “We need to go back to class, lunchtime is almost over, come on.”

“No, hyung, Woohyunnie needs me...” Sunggyu pleaded, throwing his best puppy eyes.

Dongwoo took a deep breath, closed his eyes to gather the courage to stand his ground, and softly grabbed the elder boy by the arm. “Come on Sunggyu.” 

“Nooooooooo~” He whined.

Sunggyu pouted back to his classroom. He couldn’t believe that not only Dongwoo didn’t let him stay with his friend, but his puppy eyes also didn’t work this time. It was simply impossible. Sungyeol never fell for them, with Sungjong and Hoya they worked like 50/50 of the time, but Dongwoo… his puppy eyes were foolproof till now. 

He felt betrayed and made sure to show his teacher that he wasn’t pleased during class. Dongwoo threw him some apologetic looks as he taught but Sunggyu only ended up forgiving him when Woohyun returned to class later. He tried asking his friend if he was feeling better, but Woohyun didn’t say much, he just put his backpack on his lap and placed a hand inside. 

It wasn’t hard to figure out why the younger boy did that. Taking things out of his chest had helped Woohyun a lot but the boy still needed physical comfort, he liked hugging and that’s what comforted him. Everyone tried hugging him at some point, and Woohyun gladly accepted, but other people's hugs didn’t work as well as Myungsoo’s would. But, he had been avoiding his dad (and consequently, his hugs), so the battered plushie was the next best thing and he had been constantly hugging it whenever he could. Sunggyu knew his friend was always carrying it around in his bag, he even brought it back to Myungsoo's apartment and slept with it, but, of course, he wouldn’t take it out from the bag in front of the other kids. 

Sunggyu ended up deciding he would try talking to his friend again while they waited to be picked up. The younger wasn’t always the first kid to go home so he thought they would have time for talks and hugs but that didn’t happen today. He also thought Myungsoo would ‘sit and wait’ for a longer time (this is why he wanted to in so badly) but that also didn’t happen today. Once school was over, Myungsoo was already waiting for Woohyun and the said boy was all awkward about it. He was primarily confused to see Myungsoo since he asked Dongwoo not to call him, and, secondarily, he was afraid to look the adult in the eyes. 

Despite all awkwardness, Woohyun slowly approached his dad, and after a brief goodbye to Dongwoo and Sunggyu, the pair of father and son left school rather quickly. 

Sunggyu was slightly worried because he noticed his friend’s head was cast down but it wasn’t like could worry for long because Sungyeol arrived a few minutes later with a small cake. That confused Sunggyu, why would his brother bring a cake? Was he apologizing for something? But.. his brother didn't even upset him lately, why would he want to apologize?

As Sunggyu blinked in confusion, Sungyeol, who usually didn’t like to stand out, asked every kid to gather and then announced that today was their teacher's birthday. Kids gasped left and right and Dongwoo’s cheeks became as pink as his hair when the kids surrounded him. Before they knew it, everybody was singing the birthday song and cheering. 

“Aigoo, I can’t believe this,” Dongwoo said, slightly embarrassed, but loving the attention and the hugs he was receiving from the kids. “Thank you.”

“Adfsghajk, hyung, it’s your birthday! Congratulations! I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.” Sunggyu made a sorry expression for a fraction of a second before he tried to scold his teacher.“Why haven’t you told us? Now Woohyunnie missed!” Sunggyu babbled with all sorts of mixed feelings once it was his turn to hug the teacher. Dongwoo could only shrug, the boys had exams this week, and he didn’t want to distract them with his birthday. Besides, what happened with Woohyun today made him forget it. “Hyung, do we have a gift? We need a gift!” Sunggyu tried to whisper to his brother once he parted ways with his teacher.

Sungyeol chuckled but winked at his brother, which made the boy relax. “Of course I have, it’s in the car.”

“Sungyeol, you didn’t have to, it’s cool, really,” Dongwoo said but the pair of brothers didn’t seem to agree.

“Of course, I have to, you’re our friend. And aside from returning the favor - and gifting you as you gifted me on my birthday - you deserve a gift for everything you help Sunggyu, and all the other kids, with for the whole year.”

If Dongwoo had heard that, he would feel touched but the kids were in an uproar trying to hug him and show all the love they had for their beloved teacher. After a minute or two of watching Dongwoo distributing hugs and laughs, the pair of brothers managed to leave and wait for him in the car outside.

“Hyung, do we really have a gift?” Sunggyu asked to be sure, momentarily forgetting about Woohyun as they walked from the school to the car.

“We have it. Hoya hyung and his brother dragged me out shopping for the whole afternoon so I bought something.” The elder explained.

“What is it?” 

“I bought him a book Hoya hyung said he wanted to read…” Sunggyu immediately glared. Not that he thought books were bad gifts, but it was an obvious gift from Sungyeol and he thought Dongwoo would like something different. “But I also bought him tickets to a concert.”

“Can I choose one of them to give him myself?” Sunggyu asked cheerfully.

Sungyeol chuckled at himself with the question, amused that now he seemed to know his brother rather well. “Of course, which one do you want to give him?”

“The concert tickets because it’s the cooler gift.” Sungyeol laughed again because he had already arranged Sunggyu's name on the envelope that contained the tickets. 

“Alright, alright, now let’s just wait for him in the car, ok?” Sungyeol said as they finally reached the car and he opened the backseat door for his brother. Sunggyu was happily going to enter the car but as soon as he noticed the foreigner inside, he turned at his brother with a look of disbelief. “Sunggyu.” The elder said with a warning tone and Sunggyu finally climbed into the backseat.

“Hi,” Sunggyu said in English. He tried his best to smile at the foreigner as Sungyeol closed the door and circled the car while Hoya observed him amusedly through the rearview mirror. 

“Hi, Sunggyu.” Hoya greeted him in Korean.

“Hi, Sunggyu!” Hojun tried to greet back with the same language he was spoken to.

“Hi.” The boy repeated.

“How was your day?” Hojun risked a question for a beginner in Korean. He used the right words and correct grammar, but the pronunciation was slightly off so Sunggyu became utterly confused.

“Hello?” Sunggyu said with desperation and then popped his head beside Hoya. “Hyung, what do I say?”

“You can say your day was good or bad or that your test was easy or hard.” Hoya tried to suggest an answer but he ended up mixing a bit of English and Korean. Sunggyu blinked and he was about to try again when the kid turned to Hojun again.

“Day: ok. Test: easy.” He tried to pronounce the words just as he heard.

Hojun smiled brightly and appreciated the effort, even though it wasn't perfect English, while Hoya couldn’t help but start laughing out of amusement. Sungyeol chose that moment to reenter the car. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing, Sunggyu is just the cutest thing in the world.” Hoya turned around to ruffle the young Kim's hair. “It’s ok Sunggyu, you don’t need to talk in English, we can translate if you want to tell him something, though if he wants to say something to you I guess only Sungyeol can translate better.”

“I should have asked for payment.” Sungyeol rolled his eyes and then turned around to hear his brother. 

“Will we have dinner together today?” Sunggyu asked with interest, the food was delicious even though he didn’t like to stay out of the conversation.

“Not like last time, we’ll have a family dinner this time to celebrate Dongwoo hyung’s birthday,” Hoya said. 

“We don’t need to join this time if you don’t want to,” Sungyeol added right after.

Of course, the two adults meant to inform the boy about today’s plans but the words used left him a bit confused. Sunggyu was aware he had no blood connection to Hoya - and his mother had explained that to him even before he met Sungyeol for the first time - but then again, he could remember Hoya being there forever. There was a point he called Hoya uncle, and now he only used hyung… What were they? He wanted to know to ask extra questions.

“Are we family hyung? You and I?” The boy asked as he looked at Hoya.

“Well…” Hoya frowned as he didn’t know which words to use, the question could be considered subjective if he and Sunggyu used different concepts of family.

“Kim Sunggyu, what kind of question is that?” Sungyeol gasped, more offended than Hoya was. He had been explaining different concepts to Woohyun so he thought his brother had understood things enough to never offend Hoya that way.

Noticing that Sungyeol's reaction had made the boy widen his eyes and recoil his body - and Hojun looked at them confusedly - Hoya slapped his cousin's shoulders. “I’m sure Sunggyu doesn’t mean anything bad with this question.”

“I don’t.” The boy confirmed and Hoya sent his cousin a warning glare. Sungyeol relaxed but couldn’t avoid his brother sticking his tongue out for him, he felt like complaining again but Hoya returned his attention to him.

“Technically no, but in my heart, you aren’t different from your brothers. I love you a lot too.” Hoya explained.

“I love you a lot too.” Sunggyu didn’t wait to reply. “And auntie, and uncle and Dongwoo hyung, and…” He looked from the corner of his eyes at Hojun. “...maybe when he speaks Korean?”

Hoya froze for a second but then opened the biggest touched smile.“Aigo Sunggyu, do you want to kill me today or what?” Hoya chuckled as he tried to caress the boy’s head and the boy shifted enough to let him. 

Hojun looked at Sungyeol, waiting for an explanation. “Don’t look at me, I’m not understanding much.” He then looked at Sunggyu. “Why are you being so random? Why are you asking this sort of question now? You know Hoya hyung even before you got to know me.” He asked but even though this didn’t matter to him before, he couldn’t help but feel a little bitter about it now, he simply couldn’t imagine his life without the little boy anymore.

“I want to ask something,” Sunggyu announced and the two elders in the front shared a look. Hoya checked the time, Dongwoo would still need some time to come out so he shrugged. 

“Shoot.”

“Will you still come to my festival?” He asked.

“I confess I wasn’t expecting my hyung visit to coincide with your festival, but I already talked to him and we will attend it because it’s important for you. So don’t worry ok?” Hoya winked and Sungyeol briefly translated. Hojun offered two thumbs up to assure the boy that everything was ok with him as well, but Sunggyu didn't seem exactly happy with the news. He was a bit anxious.

“What kind of reaction is this?” Sungyeol chided.

“I just… hyung, thank you for always being there but - not that I don’t want you to come, because I want to and I’ll be really really happy if you come to see me - but if we love each other and you promised to come…” Sunggyu shut his eyes tightly, gathering his courage to ask what he had in mind, and then slightly opened one of his eyes. “.... what would you feel if I asked you not to come because you aren’t my family?”

“What?” Sungyeol gasped as Hoya looked deflated.

“No, hyung, I want you to come, I absolutely want you to come and I’ll be very very very happy to have you attending my first festival, it's just a what-if kind of question.” The boy worriedly tried to apologize.

Sungyeol squinted his eyes at his brother. “What are you up to?” He asked but Hoya placed a hand on his shoulder as if saying he could handle it.

“Sunggyu, if you told me that, I would be very very hurt.” The webtoon artist answered sincerely. “Why are you asking me this?”

Sunggyu sighed deeply before looking at the two of them helplessly. “I think Woohyunnie made Myungsoo hyung very very hurt today.” The two adults in the front eyed shared a concerned look before the boy continued. “I think he might know what he did.”

———————————————————————

“Tell me everything.” He demanded as soon as closed the door of his apartment. 

Sungyeol had asked what his brother meant with ‘Woohyunnie made Myungsoo hyung very very hurt’ but then Dongwoo entered the car, and was ready to go, so no one dared to keep talking about that. Not that they didn’t want to (actually Hojun had no idea of what was going on) and Dongwoo briefly commented on what had happened during lunchtime, but everyone agreed that it was Dongwoo's day and they should keep the focus on him. After that, they headed for Dongwoo’s mom's restaurant and then everyone celebrated his birthday.

Once they returned home, Sungyeol deemed he already could try to understand what was going on again and decided that his brother wouldn't be left alone until he spilled the beans. Sunggyu kicked his shoes off and then moved his body to the couch only to drop his bag to the side and try to get comfortable on it. He and Sungyeol were super tight now and he liked that his brother took him seriously and talked to him about what was going on. 

“Where do I start?” He asked.

“From the beginning? From what happened once you crossed their door?” Sungyeol suggested as he quickly kicked his shoes off to come and sit in front of his brother. 

“Ok, so Woohyunnie was all awkward. He said everything looked different but the same and I didn’t get it until Myungsoo hyung said that he also felt like that and that they could talk about it and figure out a way to make it work once Woohyunnie was ready. He said Woohyunnie didn’t need to force himself that much last night then sent him for a bath while he prepared things so we could study.”

“Ok, Myungsoo started well. Did anything happen later or did you guys only study?”

Sunggyu leaned back a bit and made the sheepiest smile ever. “Something happened, but not with Woohyunnie because he was in the bathroom for a while.”

Sungyeol sighed deeply, it didn’t matter how many times he told his brother to not in, but Sunggyu would always disobey him on this. By now he couldn’t bother to feel angry anymore, he just rubbed his hands on his face and tried to encourage him to spill details so he could find a way to fix the situation later. “What did you do Kim Sunggyu?” He asked more tiredly than anything.

“It wasn’t that bad hyung, I swear.”

“Just tell me already.” The elder demanded.

“I asked what was going on with him, like why he hasn’t done anything until now.”

“It’s not like he isn’t doing anything, he is trying to do things in his way, in his own time. You can’t exactly blame him for that.” He sighed again. “What did he say?”

“He apologized to me.”

“To you? He did nothing to you, why would he apologize?” Sungyeol frowned, totally confused.

“Because he promised me he would take care of you,” Sunggyu explained and Sungyeol did his best to keep his face expressionless. He forgot that. “So he thought I would think of him as a liar.... because I called him a liar that time too.” He ended up admitting.

“You told me you apologized.” Sungyeol squinted his eyes suspiciously at the maknae.

“I did it!” Sunggyu said, feeling betrayed, that his brother was doubting him. “But he thought I would still think of him as a liar because I would take Woohyunnie's side.”

Well, that changed things a bit for the elder brother. “Hum...ok, I’ll believe you. Then what?”

“Then I said I didn’t think he was a liar, and that you told me I shouldn’t give him a hard time so we cleared that up, and we are cool now.” Sunggyu offered a full smile that was too forced for Sungyeol liking, there was something more in this.

“OK then.” Sungyeol looked his brother up and down and Sunggyu's weird smile was still on so the elder became doubtful again. “You didn’t stop at that, did you?”

“Well, he was the one that changed subjects,” Sunggyu said and Sungyeol frowned. “I told him I knew he didn’t lie about loving Woohyunnie and he said he wished Woohyunnie knew it too. I tried to say he knows and he is probably just waiting to open up to him again… just like you.” He said the last part paused.

“So you guys, talked about me? Sunggyu, how many times did I tell you not to in?” Sunggyu smiled sheepishly again and begged with his eyes to be forgiven. “What exactly did you tell him this time?”

“About how he needs to promote you to his queen.”

“Sunggyu!” Sungyeol hissed and then got up to pace a bit. “From all the things you could say, you talked about the chess analogy?”

“It’s ok hyung, he even laughed a bit in the beginning.”

“It doesn’t matter if he ends up laughing Sunggyu, this doesn’t help me!” He said exasperated. “He is insecure, so how I see our relationship is a big deal! He might think I’m just playing around and I’m not Sunggyu, I’m not playing around with him, I love him and I’m dead serious about it!”

Sunggyu's shoulders dropped, he hadn’t thought about everything to such an extent. “I’m sorry hyung.” He said as he cast his head down. 

Sungyeol still paced a bit before he decided that being mad at Sunggyu wouldn’t solve anything. He returned to the couch, sat on it, and lifted Sunggyu’s chin so they could look at each other's eyes. 

“Why did you do this, hm?” He tried to ask with patience he didn’t know where he got from.“Sunggyu, I know you had the best intentions to help me, I know this in my heart, but when you in like this it might seem that I’m using you to manipulate Myungsoo. That is totally wrong but because I wasn’t on my best behavior when we met them, Myungsoo might think I didn’t change. And I’m trying so hard….”

“I’m really sorry,” Sunggyu said as his eyes filled with tears. “I just wanted him to make a move with you and with Woohyunnie.” The boy explained guiltily. “I tried telling him that Woohyunnie wouldn’t mind now if you two dated.”

Sungyeol blinked away, he was surprised. “Have Woohyun told you this himself?”

Sunggyu tried to hold his tears. “Not with these exact words. Later, when we were alone, he said something.” 

Sungyeol slightly squinted his eyes because that had caught his interest. He took a deep breath and tried to make up with the younger. “No, don’t cry, it was not that bad, I think I can fix it.” He said as he tried to clean his brother's tears.

“How?” The boy whined and Sungyeol decided to share something he hadn’t shared till now.

“I didn’t share with you because we hadn’t made any big decisions but, on the day I went to pick Hoya's hyung's brother up from the airport, I met Myungsoo and we talked about ourselves.”

“Hyung, you should have told me!” The boy complained, feeling slightly betrayed too.

“Yes, maybe I should. But I know you want good news, Sunggyu, and despite talking, the good news we are both waiting for wasn’t there.”

Sunggyu's shoulders dropped in disappointment. “What did he say then?” 

“That he is thinking about it and that he will slowly talk to me again. So don't worry, I'll try to talk to him again.”

Sunggyu's shoulders deflated again. “What I tried to do was useless then?”

“Well, maybe you have more information than you think. I didn’t know Woohyun wouldn’t mind us dating now, why don’t you tell me more about that?”

“Well, he didn’t exactly say that, this was what I said to Myungsoo hyung because I wanted him to not be afraid to date you,” Sunggyu explained carefully, now a bit afraid of his brother's reaction.

“But you said Woohyun said something later.” Sungyeol tried to make Sunggyu talk and the boy sighed. 

“He doesn’t think it will be a good thing if you two talk again.” That disappointed Sungyeol, from the way Sunggyu used his words before he was expecting good news. Seeing that maybe his words disappointed his brother too much, Sunggyu quickly tried to explain a little more. “But he said ‘if I knew Myungsoo hyung liked boys before…’ that is good, right? He considered it, right?”

“Maybe he indeed considered but this sentence doesn’t explain anything that much, did he say anything else?” Sungyeol urged.

“He said that if Myungsoo hyung lied to him he can lie to you too so you’d still be hurt. He said he doesn’t want to see you hurt because he loves you and wants to take care of you.” 

Sungyeol's eyes unfocused and he leaned back to think. Yes, that wasn’t exactly good news but this wasn’t bad either. Woohyun loved him - and after the times he begged to be taken in, Sungyeol was more than sure about it - but this showed that the boy was just afraid. Not afraid because he didn’t want something between the adults to bloom, but because the situation with his father made him afraid that Myungsoo would keep hurting people. It was a valid fear for Woohyun but not when it came to him. 

“There is a chance he really doesn’t mind.” The elder announced and the maknae was about to clap excitedly when Sungyeol held both his hands. “Wait, let’s not celebrate before it’s time, if Myungsoo doesn’t want it, Woohyun's opinion won’t matter. What did Myungsoo say about the chess analogy?” He asked before letting go of the younger's hands.

“He laughed but he didn’t seem to like it that much, he is afraid that promoting you means checkmate with Woohyunnie,” Sunggyu explained tiredly.

Sungyeol frowned. “I don’t remember my analogy saying anything about checkmate with Woohyun.”

Sunggyu shrugged. “It was Myungsoo hyung that brought it up because that’s what he is afraid of, so I told him that wouldn’t happen because you are not the enemy.” Sungyeol sighed.

“What did he say?”

“He said that things don’t always happen the way we want,  that he needs to give his situation with Woohyunnie attention while he thinks about you two, and that he will try to talk to you.” Ok, that was nothing new.

“Hm… what else?”

“Woohyunnie got back from the bathroom so we just pretended we were talking about chess. Hyung asked if you have been playing lately and how’s that going so I said you can’t do without an extra queen too to protect your king too.”

Sungyeol was about to complain and say he didn’t recall ever telling Sunggyu something like this but he quickly figured out that Sunggyu had developed the chess theory for him all on his own. He gasped when realized what the boy really meant. “Sunggyu, you have no faith in me.” He accused, then blinked. “I have to test your IQ.”

“It’s not like that hyung.” The boy worriedly said, choosing to not bother about IQ and whatever that meant. “I believe in you, you turned your game around. It’s just… without Myungsoo hyung as your queen it will be more difficult than it needs to be.”

Sungyeol sighed deeply, his brother wasn’t exactly wrong so he had no arguments. He came a long way but he still felt like he needed Myungsoo's guidance, Sunggyu would be a tricky teenager to deal with, he was already a trick child as it is. Then he briefly thought about the fact he lost arguments with an eight-year-old, he needed to test Sunggyu's IQ.

“How did this conversation end?” He ended up asking after a while.

“Myungsoo hyung said you should learn how to play some sports.” Sungyeol frowned. “ He says sports also have a strategy but it is different from chess.” Sungyeol frowned, even more, this didn’t seem like anything big until Sunggyu continued. “He said the players need to play in a team and everyone has to be aware of the strategy and work together, trust each other and their abilities, and always try to communicate otherwise no strategy is going to work.”

“Ok, I could say he needs to communicate a little more too but this is a big critic of how I dealt with things.” Sungyeol couldn’t help but gulp hard and then bit his lips. “I’m officially very worried now.”

“Don’t be hyung, I told him you can learn,” Sunggyu said as he tried to pat his brother's shoulder.

“I can, can’t I?” Sungyeol asked, suddenly too unsure about it.

“Do you want to?” Sunggyu asked slowly, making sure to show in this tone this was a concern but Sungyeol didn’t think too much to reply.

“Is this even a question Sunggyu? YES, I want to, he just needs to figure out how to teach.” Sungyeol ended up blurting nervously. With this, Sunggyu let out a big breath, suddenly he wasn’t worried anymore, those two would make up. But, as much as Sunggyu relaxed completely, Sungyeol couldn’t do the same. “Did Woohyun catch up on this conversation?” 

“No! I mean, yes, I mean, just a bit?” Sungyeol made a look of disbelief so Sunggyu explained better. “He knew we weren’t talking about chess so I told him I was trying to make you two talk and this is when he said he is afraid Myungsoo hyung lies to you.”

“Is there anything more I need to know?” Sungyeol asked with a tired sigh and Sunggyu seemed to think about it for a whole minute before replying.

“About you? Not really.”

“What about between them?” Sungyeol asked, now trying to figure out the whole picture. If he needed to talk to Myungsoo to apologize over Sunggyu then he might as well know the whole thing.

“Well, Woohyunnie didn’t say much at first but when Myungsoo hyung started reading some letters beside us he got annoyed by his presence.” 

Sungyeol rubbed his hands over his face. He didn’t think Myungsoo would try to read those letters at this point, but he was wrong. It wasn’t like he was afraid of the content of the letters, after all, he had told Myungsoo everything, but he left the nasty details out and the last thing he wanted was to inspire counter-productive feelings in his ex-lover. He didn’t want pity, he didn’t want guilt, he didn’t want Myungsoo owing him anything, he just wanted love. But then again if Myungsoo already read some and wanted to finish everything there was too little he could do about it.

“Maybe it was a bit too soon for them to be together.” Sungyeol tried to conclude calmly as he tried to bury any panic deep inside. He had heard Sunggyu and Dongwoo in the car but at this point, he didn't know if he wanted to understand the whole picture, he felt like a headache might appear any moment and maybe it would be better if he just slept it off and tried again the next day. “Thank you for your report Sunggyu, I need to think about how to talk to Myungsoo about all the things you told me and…”

“I’m not done.” Sunggyu interrupted his brother's speech and the elder sighed internally, he would get away until the boy said everything he wanted, right? “Something happened this morning between them.” 

“What happened?” 

“Myungsoo hyung discovered Woohyunnie will not sing with me but be part of a play instead," Sunggyu said the word 'play' with disgust, he still hated it even though Sungyeol tried to argue it wasn't a bad thing.

"Eh? I thought he knew." The elder said with a bit of a surprise. "I thought his mother would tell him."

"But he didn't and he was sad because of it. I mean, not because Woohyunnie chose the play but because he wasn't informed." The young boy explained ."He tried to ask why Woohyunnie decided to do that when he had been so excited to sing with me before - sigh - but Woohyunnie snapped and said the festival is only for our families and that Myungsoo hyung shouldn’t come because he isn’t his family.”

Sungyeol could almost hear the noises of the pieces connecting to form a whole picture. That's definitely the thing Sunggyu was referring to when he said Woohyun hurt Myungsoo and that also explained why Sunggyu asked the questions he asked Hoya today. The elder knew the maknae didn't hurt the cousin but he couldn't help but be sure  Sunggyu had already processed every information he had and concluded things correctly, he just wanted confirmation. 

“Damn.” Sungyeol rubbed his hands over his face and couldn’t help but hiss. “That should have hurt Myungsoo a lot. I mean, Woohyun probably already said ‘you’re not my father’ to him a couple of times already but this would be so painful for Myungsoo to hear."’

“Can you talk to him about this too?” Sunggyu pleaded worriedly. “You could tell him Woohyunnie doesn’t mean that.”

Sungyeol scratched his head, he could try but he doubted he could say that to Myungsoo. “I don’t know Sunggyu, I don’t want to lie, and Woohyun might mean it. Maybe not all of it but part of it, you know what his thoughts are lately.”

“No, hyung~~~” Sunggyu shook his head. “He doesn’t.”

“And how do you know? Hm? Did he say something about it?” Sungyeol asked, a bit exasperated.

“No, but something happened during lunch, so I know."

"Dongwoo hyung said he didn't feel well during lunch, what exactly happened during lunch today?" Sungyeol asked, utterly confused.

"Well, we were eating and I asked him why he said that - you know, for Myungsoo hyung to not come. And he was like, he can do whatever he wants. And I was like, I know but what if he wanted to come even so? Then I said he sounded like he really didn't want Myungsoo hyung to come at all - because he really sounded like that - and then I asked if he really meant that - because, you know, I was trying to understand him."

"That's before he felt unwell?" Sungyeol asked and the young boy nodded. 

“I tried to call him at some point but it was like I wasn’t even there. After a few minutes, he said he didn’t feel well, so I rushed to call Dongwoo hyung and we brought him to the nurse's office, and he said he felt his stomach upset and discomfort in his heart.” The boy asked as he searched for confirmation in Sungyeol eyes.

“And Dongwoo hyung said the nurse checked and it wasn’t even a big deal to send him home.” Sungyeol concluded what he already knew but Sunggyu just shook his head.

“I heard them talking hyung, the nurse noona said there was nothing wrong with his body and that he was complaining about his feelings. She told Dongwoo hyung that it could be guilt or fear - I heard, even though they tried to whisper - but Woohyunnie doesn’t know that. And then… And then Dongwoo hyung asked Woohyunnie if he wanted to call Myungsoo hyung to bring him home but he said he didn’t want to, he said that maybe it would pass if he rested.” 

“Hmm.. interesting.” Sungyeol tapped his chin as he thought. “Have you managed to talk to him about it and confirm anything?”

“No, because Dongwoo hyung dragged me back to class and I didn’t like that. If it wasn’t his birthday today...” Sunggyu crossed his arms and slightly threatened and Sungyeol almost chuckled at his brother's antics.

”Hey, don’t be hard on Dongwoo hyung, he was not wrong.” He scolded.

“Buy hyung~~~~ because of that I couldn’t even try to talk to Woohyunnie about it. And when class was finally over, Myungsoo hyung took  him home.” The boy waved his hands in the air and then pouted once he stopped, this was extremely unfair in his opinion but Sungyeol just made a surprised expression. Oh, Myungsoo was the one picking him up today? Considering everything Sunggyu told him now made him doubt this was a good experience for Myungsoo, but if he were to consider his ex-lover was trying to be more proactive, then he should congratulate his ex-lover. He had to put his thoughts away when Sunggyu continued. “...but Woohyunnie couldn’t look him in the eyes, this is why I know he feels guilty.” 

“Ok, ok, you may have a point.” The elder conceded and Sunggyu made an expression that just exclaimed ‘well, thank you’. Sungyeol once more had the feeling he should test his brother's brains but decided to push that to another day. “If it was any other day, I’d probably try to meet him so we could talk and make him feel better, but today was Dongwoo hyung's birthday so…” Sungeyol wanted to wrap that conversation up but once Sunggyu made an ‘I’m worried, do something’ expression he changed strategies. “Take your bath and dress in your pajamas, I’ll try to discover where he is so you can talk to him through video call before bedtime ok?”

After a happy squeal, Sunggyu hugged his brother briefly and then left running to do what he was told, but once they actually made the video call, Woohyun wasn’t willing to talk that much. Yes, he was pleased to see his hyungs but the moment Sunggyu asked if he was feeling better, the boy got all awkward.

“I’m gonna be ok hyung.” A sigh was heard shortly after, from Sonmi on his side.

“Are you sure? You didn’t seem ok today, but you can talk to us Woohyunnie, we are on your side.” Sunggyu insisted.

“I just don’t want to talk about it right now.” A suspicious look to the side and the pair of brothers knew he didn’t want to talk in front of Sonmi. 

After that, there wasn’t much they could talk about. The next day, Woohyun informed he tried to prepare for the exams and Sunggyu dutifully reported that it was Donwoo’s birthday today. Woohyun promised to draw something to gift Dongwoo with and Sungyeol said he could bring Sunggyu to visit tomorrow and order some pizza. They agreed to talk tomorrow and then each boy said their goodbyes.

Sunggyu didn’t feel completely satisfied with this video call but he was determined to try again tomorrow. At this point, he was already yawning too much to even complain. Sungyeol just tucked him into bed and then left the younger room, already trying to muster some courage to apologize to Myungsoo all over again.

He left his phone charging and took a good and relaxing bath, despite his mind being all over the place with what Sunggyu managed to report today. Once he was dry enough, he laid with his stomach on his bed and supported his weight on his elbows, and grabbed his phone. After a deep breath, he tried to type (and erase) a million different apology messages but none seemed to satisfy him. He needed to get this restlessness out of his system After that he sent the most basic and neutral one.

Sungyeol: Hey, are you up?

Sungyeol was expecting Myungsoo to take some time to reply, even leaving an answer on the next day, but Myungsoo unexpectedly replied right after.

Myungsoo: Finally.

The elder frowned.

Sungyeol: Were you expecting a message?

Myungsoo: I had a feeling you’d send a message today.

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AN: Hello folks, this time didn't take me a month to update kkkk, I still had some struggles but hey the ending is near. I wanted to finish everything in this and next chapter but this part where they will text grew too big... few scenes left, but there is a bunch half-written. If things go with the plan I hope to finish it with a double update or something like that.