IF YOU would ask me to forgive you, I'm pretty sure I would have done that. But you never did. You didn't even apologize. That's what in this situation hurt more than anything else. But I guess I wasn't even waiting for you to apologize, somehow I knew you won't do it because you were too weak to do it. You are too weak to do it now too.

(2012)

I don't know what happened after I left the studio but Teddy oppa asked me not to come there for awhile. Which is not that good since I'm now sitting home alone trying to forget Mr. Kwon. Yes, I now decided to call him Mr. Kwon. Since I am really bad at forgetting things I started to drink. I drunk until I was so drunk that I couldn't walk and just needed to crawl to get to the bed. Well I guess you want to ask me if it helped to forget, it didn't. I know if I will simply continue to do this I would became an alcoholist which isn't good. Right now it's 3 in the morning, I'm sitting alone in the iving room    drinking cognac and eating chocolate. 'What if I would go out with someone? Will it make me forget?' I thought and diceded to call my one of the closest friends Lee Soohyuk.

''Noona. Did something happen?'' He answered the phone and I realised I was calling really late.

''Soohyukiee… You are friends with Kim Woobin, right? Could you give his number or at least some your other hot

friend's number?'' 

''Noona, are you drunk?''

''No, no, no… I'm not drunk Hyukiee… I just want to see some hot men''

''Let's talk tomorrow, noona. I'm hanging up''

''Good Night, Hyukieee'' I said and he hanged up.

Ahhgg… What to do? Maybe I should go to sleep. At least the I will feel loved by Mr. Kwon. But wait… I just remembered about Jo In Sung oppa. 'Maybe I should give him a chance since he was really honest with me' I stood up and walked to the bathroom. I turned shower on and walked under it fully clothed. 'So this is how Tabi feels when he is showering' I tought and laughed at myself.  I walked out in my soaked clothes and took them off. I sat d