Author’s note: Welp. I updated this fanfic again and I felt so sorry for you guys who kept on waiting TT I am really sorry, I’ve been saying the word ‘sorry’ for countless times already and I am going to say it again haha. Well, this chapter was stock on my files for months now, didn’t really get a chance to continue it these past few days (and now I finished it woo TT). As I said, I would really update this story no matter what. This author will do her best to end this fanfic with a great ending. I’ll do my best. Thank you so much for loving this story and for waiting (I feel so bad TT)

[JIYEON’S POV]

It was as if that incident just happened yesterday. The times I ignored her and the times I ever spoke out words that break her heart like that. It wasn’t my intentioned to do so, but because Hyomin is kind of a hard headed person, and that may be because she doesn’t understand what to do with herself or slightly confused of what just happened, I brought her father up that night and made her slapped me as slightest as she could with her cold and trembled hand.

I told her I did tried to understand her, she did approached me that day, or should I say the last two days in school since winter vacation will start soon. I don’t know what came up to my mind to leave her like that as I convey the cold words from my mouth. Hyomin was trying to recover our friendship and so do I, but the thought of she was having a real hard time with her family and pushing me away with it makes me feel like I was a burden to her.

Was I a burden to her? Or is it because her father gave her the pain-side-meaning of love that made her say to not love her the way I do since then?

Ah, I just figured that out. From all the analysis I made, in the end, I found out that she’s afraid of being left at with the person she cares and loves the most after that night.  Am I one of them?

I wanted to ask her these things and clear things out. So what I did, I followed her without her knowing. I knew where she lives so I wouldn’t worry where to find her. Telling alibis to my parents that I did review for the entrance exam with Hyomin so I could go out without them worrying. So I could at least see her appearance, so I could at least see how she is and what she’s been doing all this time.

Whenever I go out, I always kept these hopes that one day things will go well. I can’t just give up like that – I know she needs me, because I know she’s been killing inside even though she doesn’t want to tell.

I witnessed her walking towards nowhere. I even saw she went close to a man with his worried and a very sorrow look. They were talking something I couldn’t get a chance to hear since I was in a distant. Standing here unclue of who that man is, I furrowed my brows as to why Hyomin was, making a fist in front of that man with a woman who just came in.

My mind is in mess right now. Things happen so sudden that I couldn’t even come up with an idea of why this time. Hyomin left and was having this vulnerable expression. I followed her. I want to know why. I want to know the truth so I could help her at least this time, as a worried friend of hers.

“I told you to not keep it all yourself,”

All I wanted to do is to hug her; she was very heart broken and was so weak. Hyomin was crying, she is silently crying and don’t even care she could get sick since it was very cold. Her tear drops were unstoppable, and I am here hurting myself seeing her being like that.

“Jiyeon..”

Hyomin tried to avoid me, but I don’t want her to. I squat down and did my very best to persuade her – she’s in the middle of giving up just by looking at her.

She asked why I am doing this. She told me that she hurt me a lot. I smiled and look at her – this is not really the important thing to talk right now. I wiped her tears and tell her to go home with me and be with me for while so I could comfort her. I was begging for her to heal her heart just for tonight. I wouldn’t want to hear her cry unstoppable but at the same time I want her to, since I knew from the start she’s been keeping it inside.

Hyomin finally look on me – with her eyes filled with sorrow. She has this gloomy and a very weak look, I couldn’t stand looking at her like that. At the end, she did not let out any single words for me because Hyomin hugged me tightly and whispered that she was sorry.

She was very sorry for everything.

“I made hot choco for you” I went from kitchen and back to my room, where Hyomin was on my bed as I covered her with a warm comforter as she was freezing to death.

I placed the mug on the bedside table. Hyomin was still gaping at the comforter blankly.

“If you want something just tell me, ” I smiled at her though she wasn’t looking, “what about something to eat? I’ll bring some..”

Hyomin sigh. I looked down and just decided to leave her alone. Maybe she needed time to be alone.

“I’ll go out now, I’ll be back..”

“Jiyeon..”

I turned my head again to her and wondered what she’s going to say. I waited for like a few minutes before she finally spoke up and decided to talk to me – with sincerity.

“Don’t leave..” she says, “please don’t leave me alone. I don’t want to be alone anymore..”

I did not expect her to say that to me and I did not even expect that she wants me to be by her side. I feel happy that she said that, because I know she’s letting me heal her heart.

I went closer to her and grab her hand. It was too cold that I don’t even want to let it go. Again I smiled at her, hoping she would do the same thing. I slowly spread my arms to hug her tonight, and say that it was okay and that I am always here.

“I won’t leave you,” I whispered to her ear, “ever…”

Right then she hugged me back. She was so thankful and so do I.

The next morning came and it felt like more special when I open my eyes and the first thing I see is her – sleeping comfortably without any worries form on her facial. Hyomin was facing at me though and I don’t even want to move an inch since it may wake her up. The only best thing to do is to stare at this beautiful being without any noise, comfortably. Without thinking and such, I did not realize my right hand slowly starts to her hair as it was blocking her angelic face.

Unexpectedly, just like in the movies, Hyomin opened her eyes and did see what I did to her.

“G-good morning..” I said sheepishly.

By that, Hyomin giggled at me.

Breakfast had already been prepared by mom. We are all together sitting comfortable as we say our ‘good mornings’ to each other. My father didn’t really looked like in a rush; I bet he doesn’t have much work to do to go earlier than 7 in the morning like he would. My parents were sitting right on the other side while Hyomin and I sat next to each other opposite to them. Mom would always ask Hyomin about things like did she get enough sleep with me or what; she really loves to tease me.

Christmas lights were still on and it was still snowing outside. It was a great day to begin with. The gentle yet warm conversation we had made it more comfy and very lovable. Though I can’t assure about her, but I would definitely want her to be happy.

“By the way,” dad started, “since I can see that you are actually working on passing the entrance exam in Seoul University, I found a place for you to live in.”

I raise my brows, didn’t really react that quick but I know what he means.

“I don’t really feel good about you living alone..” my mother chime in,

“Ah why?” I asked, pouting.

They both laugh leaving me clueless. I don’t know why these two loved to tease me so much.

“I won’t believe you if you say you can take care of your own, and I am afraid of the result.”

I looked down. It’s not like I can’t take care of my own and besides I am not a kid anymore. I am supposed to be happy to hear I could now live my own. In fact Hyomin would go to that University and so do I. Imagine I could still see her everyday even though we do have different courses but it’s better than not seeing each other.

“This kid..” my mom slightly shaking her head, “that’s why me and your Dad decided one thing.”

I lifted my head and look at them both, alternatively.

“Hyomin,” my father continued, “if you don’t mind, can you live with Jiyeon? You two would go to the same University anyway.”

I widened my eyes and look at them, making sure they’re not kidding or something. I don’t know, I feel like I do want to jump with happiness while squealing but I couldn’t do that in front of my parents and to Hyomin. I glance at Hyomin who was busy eating her meal, she has the same expression as mine, I could guess.

“Well,” she cleared , “it would be fine but how about the lease?”

“You don’t have to worry. My friend handed me that apartment, actually I bought it last week.”

I smiled while I continued my meal. I am not really sure if she would say yes. But I am hoping that she would.

“This is a great offer I couldn’t just accept..”

“We are very thankful to you, Hyomin.” my mom conveyed, “you don’t know how thankful I am to have you as my daughter’s friend. ”

“Please take this as a thankful gift for helping Jiyeon to her study and for the entrance exam. More importantly, we wouldn’t want her to live alone and we are very sure that you two are beyond close friends.”

Beyond…close friends?

“I see you two as siblings and I am happy for that.”

“You two could check the apartment and tell if you like it. Dad will give time touring you around Seoul.”

I am very glad to hear such thing. Especially when Hyomin did say yes.

~~

“Thank you” I said almost whispering, Hyomin was sitting beside me while playing on her phone.

“For?”

“For saying yes. It could have been a burden to you though..”

I looked at her and she was smiling at me. Her eyes fix to mine and I couldn’t even dare looking away because it was too precious to cut the moment.

“I would love to take care of you, ” the brunette took her sight on her phone again, “I should be the one who’s thankful.” and added.

She was smiling. Her expression today was so much opposite to what I witnessed last night. I don’t have the courage to ask her questions about why she was crying and why she was very sad. Because if I do, I am afraid that this expression she’s giving me today will fade away. Who would want that?

I should let her be. If she’s willing to tell me about her problems, then I would glad to listen to her, and would love to help. Although I know I couldn’t give good and wise advice, at least I know that it’s the best thing I could do. Apparently, she has these problems with her family. I am sure this is the reason why she’s living alone and wouldn’t want to share it. Hyomin didn’t even tell me about her parents since then.

“Hyomin..”

“Hmm?”

I would like to ask her about what’s her plan this Christmas but there’s this inside me pulling me not to. They say to trust your instincts, so I guess I should just follow what I feel not to ask.

“Do you want to watch some movie?” I ask this instead,

The brunette nodded slightly and looked on me with that lovable gaze.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing..”

I was about to stand up and to turn on the TV. However, Hyomin was giving me this worry expression and gave me a bad feeling for a sudden.

Not wasting any time, I asked her why.

“I think you shouldn’t get involved with this but..” Hyomin sigh, “I thought of maybe, telling these things that made me cry last night.”

I raised my brows. I wanted her to continue with what she just started.

“Aren’t you curious? You never asked..”

I smiled. I just thought of these a while ago. Now, I think it’s time to ask?

“Go on..” I started, “tell me why. I’ll listen.”

Right then, Hyomin told me everything. About her leaving her mom alone at her house, about how she was being a bad daughter towards her. Her father had an affair and I guess it was the man I saw last night. Hyomin told me that she felt like she doesn’t want to live anymore after all the things she had witnessed – the violence, the heartbreaking words, the arguments every night and in front of their meals. Every early in the morning she could only hear glass breaking, and the sound of her mom crying. She wouldn’t want that.

All she wants is to live her life together with her mother, be happy of what they have and let her father be. But her mother wouldn’t want what she wanted for it’s the best, so she decided to leave.

After such a heart to heart yet warm talk, I told her that everything’s going to be okay. That I know it is not right to leave her mother like that, because she needed her the most. The only person her mother has is Hyomin and so I want her to go back to her and heal her mother’s wounds too. They could do it together, no matter how bitter taste their lives are, love is the only thing that could heal everything. So I do want her to go back and start their lives like she wanted it to be.

Time flies so fast and here I am preparing gifts and candies for kids who would stop by. It is now 24^th of December, where I could only hear jingles and Christmas songs. Mom had prepared meals and my dad was playing with his guitar while singing a song in front of mom. It was always been like this. I remember when I was a little, I would cry loudly at the corner when my parents won’t give me pineapples. Then there’s dad who would almost hug me and tell me to get it the next day so I would sleep early.

I laughed slightly at the thought. How spoiled I was back then and right now, they’re giving me limits. Say no to everything that wouldn’t benefit to me. Well, they would let me do things I really loved to and I think there’s no problem with that.

My thoughts were interrupted when my phone rings. The name on the screen made me pick it up quickly and press the answer button gently. This is a very important person I would love to see everyday.

“Hello” I smiled, slowly leaned on the wall as I was placing the pink roses in the vase.

“Merry Christmas..” a soft yet lovely voice could be heard. I could only smile at myself right now, like an idiot.

“Merry Christmas! How are you?”

“Can you come out for a minute?”

I tilt my head to that question. Then I realized that she was standing outside as soon as I glimpse at the window.

“Oh.. you’re here…”

I quickly went out and went towards Hyomin who was waiting outside. I don’t want her to wait there suffered from freezing season.

“You should have just knocked the door,” I said, “it’s very cold outside.” then pouted.

Hyomin laughed at my cute reaction. She would always tease me whenever I did that. It was way too cute when she did and I wouldn’t mind getting tease by her all the time.

“Anyway, what brings you here?”

She hovered the paper bag she’s holding,”I brought coconut macaroons and thought of maybe to share it with you.”

“Really?” I asked as if I did not get it, “you came all the way here just to give me these?”

“Hey, it sounds like you don’t want it..”

“No!” I shook my head twice, “you should have told me you would come. That way I could even prepare something for you.”

The brunette smiled again.  Her giggles made my ears turned to red as well as my cheeks. I don’t know, whenever she laugh like that it gives me a great feelings. I could squeal if I wanted to.

“To be honest, I made these coconut macaroons as an excuse.” she conveyed,

“the truth is I just wanted to see you.”

We look to each other’s eyes in unison.

And I couldn’t even express how happy this Christmas would be.

“I miss you.”