Joon sighed as he sat in the stairwell of the building.  Leaning his head against the wall, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

Images of Seungho’s mother swam before his eyes.  Her tall and proud stature had oozed enough charisma to make him shake in his boots.  In the near year that he’s known Seungho, he’d never once crossed paths with Seungho’s family.  They didn’t come to visit and Seungho never went home for the holidays.  He’d gotten so accustomed to being with Seungho that any thoughts of family had left his mind. 

Joon vaguely wondered why she’d decided to visit all of a sudden.  It had been so long; Joon honestly couldn’t remember the last time Seungho spoke to his family on the phone.  Was it because Seungho had chosen to move in to KTA rather than go home for Christmas?  But even so, Seungho’s family hadn’t been upset about that choice… so why now?

Joon jumped as his phone rang in his pocket.  Pulling it out, he sighed in relief to see Seungho’s name across the screen.  He paused and hovered his thumb over the answer button.  He wondered if Seungho told his mother about them.  Would they break up?  Or would Seungho choose him over his family?  Because surely his family wouldn’t readily accept their son’s sudden homoual relationship so easily right?  Giving his head a shake, Joon answered the call and placed it to his ear.

“Hyung,” he said softly, his voice echoing in the hallway.  He could feel his heart beating faster; he wasn’t sure what he expected Seungho to say and that made him extremely anxious.

“Oh Joon-ah,” Seungho’s exhausted voice came over the earpiece, “Come back… she’s gone.”

“Mmn,” Joon replied.  He could feel Seungho’s weariness through the phone.  Though they rarely conversed on the phone, it was easy to tell Seungho was exhausted from his conversation with his mother.  What did they discuss?  Did Seungho tell her everything?  Would it impact their relationship?  He felt anxious as he fell silent, his thoughts racing wildly in his mind.

After a brief pause, Seungho asked gently, “What are you thinking?”

Joon wanted to ask; he desperately wanted to know and he wasn’t sure if he could do it face to face.  He wanted to be reassured that nothing would change, that Seungho would still love him even if the entire family was against it.  He knew it would be unreasonable to expect it but he couldn’t help but hope it would be the case.  But as he opened his mouth, he found himself cowering and taking a step back.  As desperate as he was to be reassured, he also didn’t want to know.  What if the answer he wanted wasn’t what he was going to hear? 

“Nothing,” he said, shaking his head at the empty stairwell, “I’m coming.”  Hanging up the call, he stood let out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding.  He knew it was inevitable; Seungho would probably bring up the subject even if he didn’t ask.  But still, he had been too afraid to ask how it went.

Climbing the stairs listlessly, Joon tried to give himself an encouraging talk before he came face to face with Seungho.  Even if Seungho decided to end their relationship, they could still maintain some sort of friendship.  It wasn’t as if he would lose Seungho completely.  Besides, he reasoned with himself, Seungho didn’t sound like he was going to break up on the phone.  His voice was tired, yes, but not obviously upset or strained… that was a good sign right?

Again, Joon jumped as his phone suddenly rang again.  Placing a hand over his racing heart, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and glanced at the number.  He frowned as an unknown number flashed across the screen.  Ever since his announcement to the media, he’d been getting calls from reporters asking for interviews.  He blocked as many as he could but even still, they snuck past the block once in a while.

Sighing, he picked up the call and said, “I’m sorry, I’m not available for interviews-”

“Is this Lee Joon-shi?  I am Choi Dahee; I work for Lee-Song Group,” a woman’s voice rang musically through the ear piece, “As a representative of the CEO, I’d like to let you know that we have requested a DNA test at University Hospital this coming weekend.”

“E-Eh?” Joon stuttered, his hand gripping the phone tightly, “Th-This weekend…?”  He hadn’t expected Lee-Song to call him directly, though it made sense since he no longer had KTA managers hovering around him.

“Of course,” the woman continued, “You don’t have to show up at any time specifically.  It is actually preferred that we do not meet since we don’t want to stoke the media into writing rumors.  Just visit the hospital at your convenience sometime between Saturday and Sunday and let the front reception know you are there for a DNA test.  They’ll guide you from there.  Do you have any questions?”  She paused as she waited for him to say something.

This weekend… it was so soon.  Joon wasn’t sure what was required of a DNA test.  From the sounds of it, he didn’t need to prepare anything in particular for it.  It was so soon… was he ready to find out so soon?

“No,” Joon said quietly, “No questions… thank you for calling.”

“Of course,” the woman responded before hanging up the call with a soft click.

Pocketing his phone, Joon continued climbing the stairs.  He absentmindedly put each foot in front of the other as his head raced.  It had been almost a week since Lee-Song responded with accepting his DNA request.  And in another week, he’d find out the results.  He would either be swept up in a storm of controversy regarding the inheritance of Lee-Song… or face jail time.  Either way, his current life with Seungho in this new cozy apartment would come to an end. 

It was too fast.  Joon gripped the railing as his legs wobbled.  He hadn’t expected things to go this fast.  He wasn’t sure how long he had expected to wait… but it certainly hadn’t been only weeks.  He didn’t want his current lifestyle to end.  He didn’t want to go to jail, but he didn’t want to suddenly inherit a large corporation either.  He just wanted… Seungho.

Seungho… Joon let out a shaky breath as he leaned against the wall.  Should he tell Seungho about the testing date?  Maybe he shouldn’t; Seungho was dealing with his family already.  This would only add to his stress.  But if he didn’t… wouldn’t Seungho be upset once he found out?  Because there was no way this would be kept a secret with reporters crawling all over the place.

Sighing, Joon walked down the hall to his new apartment and paused outside.  He would tell Seungho, he decided.  Just… not right away.  He’ll find the right time between now and the weekend to break the news.  It wasn’t like it would be a completely surprise; they were both aware that the test could have been arranged at any given time.  It just so happened that the time was this weekend. 

Bracing himself, he gently opened the door and peeked inside hesitantly.  He looked up as Seungho appeared in front of him and pulled the door wide open with a mild frown.

“What took you so long?” he asked, taking Joon’s hand and pulling him inside, “Did you go far?”  He closed the door and turned to Joon.

Joon bit his lip as he looked at Seungho’s tired face.  Just moments ago, the latter had looked smoldering as they’d kissed against the wall.  And now…  “No,” Joon said, “I was just downstairs.”  Without explaining his lateness, he took a step forward and cupped Seungho’s face gently.  “You look exhausted,” Joon murmured, frowning slightly.  His heart ached for Seungho; however the conversation had gone down, it had left Seungho looking aged and weary.

“Hmm,” Seungho said, leaning into his hand, “I’ve been better.”  Sighing, he leaned against the door and gave Joon an apologetic look.  “Sorry,” he said softly, “I had no idea she was coming.”

Joon shook his head but stayed silent.  His heart thudded dully in his chest as he hoped that the words he’d been so afraid of wouldn’t be said.  He was worried that the next words coming out of Seungho’s lips would be the end.  Instead, Seungho gave him a smile that seemed to shine through his dark hanging clouds.

“Don’t look so worried,” Seungho said lightly, trying to change the mood, “She just missed me and was worried about me.”  He walked past Joon and into the kitchen.  He ripped open a box and began to unpack the kitchen supplies.

Joon watched as Seungho worked.  He knew Seungho was hiding something; there was no way that was the end of it.  “Really?” he asked, walking over, “That’s all?”  He knew it wasn’t and it made him very nervous.

Seungho paused as he pulled out a large pot.  He looked at Joon briefly before he set the pot onto the stove and sighed.  “That and…” he said, running a hand through his hair, “I… told her about us.”

Joon’s eyes widened as he stared at Seungho.  He couldn’t say he was too surprised; he had guessed the topic of conversation would involve some sort of revelation.  “Y-You did?” he said, his voice a hoarse whisper, “And?”

Seungho shrugged and began digging through the box again.  “And nothing,” he said, “She was upset but there’s nothing she can really do about it.”  He paused briefly as he pulled out oven mitts and tossed them onto the counter.  “She hasn’t disowned me,” he said with a lopsided grin, “If that’s what you’re wondering.”

Joon watched as Seungho lowered himself back into the box and continued to rummage for bowls.  He knew Seungho was putting on an act; there was no way Seungho was fine with all of this.  Even if there was nothing Seungho’s mother could do, it would still hurt Seungho to know his mother was against a very important part of his life.

Stepping over the boxes, Joon pulled Seungho upright and wrapped his arms around the latter’s neck in a tight hug.  He could feel Seungho’s arms circle his waist responsively as the two stood there in silence and relaxed into the embrace.

“I’m fine,” Seungho said softly, as if reading Joon’s mind, “Or at least I will be.  Everything will be fine.”  He sighed as he burrowed his chin against Joon’s shoulder.

Joon bit his lip as he leaned his cheek against Seungho’s neck.  Would it?  Would everything really be fine?  With the DNA test looming in the near future, things were about to change… and not necessarily for the better.  Sure, inheriting a multi-billion dollar corporation wasn’t really a bad thing.  But instead of sitting in the comfortable quarters of the CEO lounge, he could be sitting on a cold cot behind a mean looking set of bars.  And even if jail time wasn’t a hundred percent, it could still mean dealing with Lee-Song from a legal perspective… neither of which sounded like sunshine and rainbows.

“Are you okay?” Seungho said, pulling apart slightly and cupping Joon’s neck.  He ran both thumbs against Joon’s cheeks and looked at him with concern.  “Did something happen downstairs?” he asked, tilting Joon’s face towards him.

Joon thought about unloading all of his anxiety onto his rock.  Perhaps he would feel a little lighter, breathe a little easier.  But other than that, what good would it do?  He would still worry, Seungho would worry more, and the DNA test would still be in a few days.  It would be better to keep quiet for now.  There was no point in both of them losing sleep over this matter until it really came down to it.

“I’m fine,” Joon said, giving him a soft smile, “I’m fine if you’re fine.”  

Seungho smiled.  “Well I’m hungry,” he said, looking down at the half unpacked box, “I say we find some ramyun and dig in.”

Joon nodded and returned with a smile.  “Deal,” he said as he began opening the boxes.  

He’d worry about the test when it came.  For now, he would treasure these last few days with Seungho with every fiber of his being.  And when it came time to say goodbye, he would leave with no regrets.

The sun was high in the sky and the clouds puffed along like soft cotton candy.  The University Hospital towered over him as Changwook stood outside of the front doors waiting for Soyun to finish her call in the van.  

It was bigger and busier than he’d last remembered.  Of course, it’d been months if not a year since he’d last visited.  He’d been down with the flu and with complications of pneumonia so he’d been hospitalized overnight for treatment.  It wasn’t a good memory but then again, neither were any of his other hospital visits.

He remembered the first time he came to do a DNA test.  He’d been shaking in his boots as a toddler and half expected the mean looking men and women in white coats to cut off an arm or leg to take as sample.  He remembered crying in Soyun’s arms as the doctor held out a cotton swab towards him.  The second time had been much easier.  He had been nervous still but no longer scared he was going to lose a limb.  Then, too, Soyun had been by his side holding his hands.  He remembered that her hands had been colder and sweatier than his; she was equally, if not more scared.  The third and then fourth time… Changwook could barely remember those.  They had been uneventful and boring at best. 

This time, he wasn’t sure how he felt.  From the adults’ conversations, he’d learned that the previous potential brothers had been severely punished for lying about their identities.  Changwook worried that the same would happen for Joon.  He’d grown fond of that hyung, even if he rarely saw him.  He considered himself lucky to have been saved by Joon.  He was excited about the possibility that Joon was his real brother.  How amazing it would be to do brotherly things with Joon?  And finally, he would be able to eat dinner with someone other than Soyun on occasion.

However excited he was about Joon being his real brother, his own mother seemed to get more and more upset as the DNA test date approached.  Changwook never remembered his mother being at the tests, but this time she had insisted on being there.  He found it strange that she would be so anxious this time around when she couldn’t have cared less before.  Just the other day, he found her in her study clutching her chest with white knuckles and breathing heavily.  He knew this whole thing was getting to her and it made him feel guilty about being excited.

Changwook snapped out of his thoughts as Soyun rushed up to him, her face visibly upset.  He blinked as she adjusted her purse on her shoulders and clacked over in her heels.  She looked flushed; the call must not have been a good one.  Changwook only had one guess as to who it had been on the other line.  He’d only ever seen her this livid a few times and every time, the culprit to tick her off was…

“My mom?” Changwook asked as Soyun tried to compose herself, “She looked busy this morning when we’d left.”  He waited for her to say exactly what he already knew.

“Mmm,” she said, biting her lips, “I’m sorry Changwook-ah… she’s held up at work and-”

Changwook flashed his best smile and said lightly, “So what else is new?  Treat me to ice cream after this.  Otherwise I’ll run away from home crying with snot and tears.”  He gave her a wink and began walking towards the front door.  As the door slid open automatically, he heard Soyun sigh and follow him.

“That’s not funny, Lee Changwook,” Soyun said sternly, her voice trailing off as they entered the hospital.  She pinched his ears as she walked by him and made her way towards the front reception desk.

Changwook watched as she pulled out some papers from her purse.  His smile slid off of his face as he finally allowed his heart to sink.  Of course it wasn’t funny.  He had actually been happy that his mother would be with him this time.  He had hoped that, even if it was for a short while, his mother would show up at the hospital as moral support.  But as usual, he realized that Lee Changwook came second to work.  And there wasn’t a thing he could do about that.

Taking a deep breath, Changwook forced himself to smile as Soyun walked back over to him.  Together, they made their way down the hall towards the lab.  As they approached, Changwook slid his hands into Soyun’s and breathed steadily.  He was nervous, even after repeated visits, but he wouldn’t let it show.  This time, too, he would walk forward bravely and eventually look back on this as just another memory.

Author's notes:

YES I'm back!  THANK YOU to all of my readers for still sticking around until now!  Lots of things have happened in the past two months and I'm only just recovering a little bit of my normal life :)  You can expect Love Me updates to resume (although I can't promise more than once at week).  

As a side note, I LOVED writing from Changwook's perspective for the very first time.  You really see things differently from the eyes of a child.  Everything becomes much more simple!  Anyway, stay tuned for more updates!