“Kim-sajangnim!” Hyunsik said with a big smile on his face, “Thank you for coming on such short notice.”  Unlike usual, Hyunsik was genuinely happy to see him this time around. 

“Not at all,” Dongmin said, chuckling heartily, “It’s my pleasure.  After all, I did make you wait three weeks.”

Hyunsik smiled as he gestured to the couch.  He quickly poured some tea and sat down across Dongmin.

“By the way,” Dongmin said, glancing at the door, “Who was that just in your office?  A new talent?”  He accepted the tea and took a sip.

“Someone I’m considering,” Hyunsik said as Dongmin nodded.  “Sajangnim, the reason I called you here today…” he trailed off as he eyed him.

“Yes, it’s regarding the incident three weeks ago, isn’t it?” Dongmin asked, setting down the tea and sighing, “It’s unfortunate that one of our talents was involved.  I hope justice is brought down on the criminals.”

“Yes…” Hyunsik said, nodding dramatically, “Actually… the victim suffered some injuries that were quite severe.  It’s a shame we had to let him go…”

Dongmin nodded and sighed heavily.  “Yes, I heard.  It is quite unfortunate,” he agreed, “But understandable from the business perspective.”

“Yes,” Hyunsik said sighing, “It’s a shame.  Lee Joon-shi was only here for a few months…”

“Lee Joon-shi?” Dongmin repeated, frowning, “Isn’t he… the popular new talent modeling for Critique?”

“Yes,” Hyunsik said, sighing again and shaking his head dramatically, “He doing so well too…”

“He was the victim?” Dongmin asked, his surprise evident on his face, “I had no idea.”  He picked up his tea and sipped it quietly.

“Yes,” Hyunsik said, “And now, the poor boy’s left with a hefty hospital bill and no job…” He shook his head and said, “If only there was something we could do…”

“Yes well,” Dongmin said, his face scrunched up in thought, “It is quite unfortunate…”  He fell silent as he stared of into space. 

Hyunsik glanced at him and allowed him to stew for a while.  If things worked out… “He had so much promise too,” he added, sipping his own tea, “And the reasons weren’t even that clear…”

“What do you mean?” Dongmin asked, frowning, “Please explain.”

“Ah,” Hyunsik said hastily, “I really shouldn’t have mentioned that.  After all, it makes perfect sense to let him go after all…”

“Hyunsik-ah,” Dongmin said, setting down the tea again, “Tell me.”

“Well…” Hyunsik said slowly, “Lee Joon-shi was let go because he wouldn’t be able to perform his job properly.  It seems a bit early to do so, don’t you think?  Considering the fact that Joon’s injuries may not even scar.  Or the fact that his business with Critique doesn’t even involve body exposure…”

Dongmin nodded as he listened to Hyunsik.  A deep frown filled his face as he contemplated the information.  “It does seem a bit too rash,” he said, “Especially if his current job doesn’t involve any exposure.”  He sighed heavily as he nodded to reaffirm himself.

“Yes but,” Hyunsik said, “I’ve tried to appeal the process and I’ve had no luck.  I doubt they’ll listen to anyone about this.”  He glanced at Dongmin and sighed dramatically.  “And it’s not as if they’re complete wrong for doing this to a poor victim…” he trailed off.

“Lee Joon…” Dongmin said, “That boy; he seemed quite nice.  He…”  He paused as he sighed.  “He also reminds me of someone I used to know,” he said shaking his head.

“Oh?” Hyunsik asked, his interest peaking.  He had picked up on the weird vibe that Dongmin sent out when he was face to face with Joon.  He had been quite curious but Joon had specifically stated he didn’t know Dongmin.  “He must be a good friend?” he probed.

Dongmin shook his head and sighed.  “It’s all in the past,” he said heavily, “He’s no longer with us.”

Hyunsik blinked in surprise.  “Ah,” he said, “I’m sorry to hear that.”  He cleared his throat as a heavy silence fell.

Snapping out of his daze, Dongmin sighed and turned to Hyunsik.  “About Lee Joon, I’ll see if I can’t do something about it,” he said firmly.

“Ah,” Hyunsik said, “I can’t trouble you to-”

“No, no,” Dongmin dismissed him with a wave, “That boy grew on me.  I’ll talk to head office.”

“I appreciate it and I’m sure Joon would too,” Hyunsik said, “But I don’t think head office will listen to anyone…”

“Hmph,” Dongmin said, standing, “I’m the liaison representing Lee-Song.  I think I have enough weight in this matter.”  He nodded, his frown both deep and challenging.

Hyunsik stood and grinned.  “Then I will have to thank you for your efforts, sajangnim!” he said, bowing, “I’m sure Joon will be happy to hear that sajangnim is working hard for him!”

Dongmin puffed out his chest and nodded.  Confidently, he turned to Hyungsik and said, “Just wait for my call, Hyunsik-ah.”  With a nod, he strutted out of Hyunsik’s office and closed the door behind him.

Hyunsik sighed and grinned.  Finally… the fat man was going to be of some use…

“I can walk just fine,” Joon said as Seungho gripped his arm tightly with one hand.  His other was filled with bags containing the things they’d packed from the hospital.

“I know,” Seungho said, frowning, “I’m just… it’s just in case.”  He shifted the weight of the bags as they climbed the stairs up to the apartment.

Joon sighed as he let Seungho help him.  His ribs still ached, as did his collarbone, but walking was no longer a problem for him.  He still felt a dull pain when he went to the washroom, but it was much more bearable.  The only thing left was to remove his cast in a few weeks’ time.

Easing the door open, Seungho went inside and dumped the bags before coming back out and helping Joon.

“You’re treating me like a pregnant woman,” Joon mused as Seungho held his hand.

Seungho looked at him, surprised.  He sighed and backed off a bit as Joon kicked off his shoes.  “I’m sorry,” he said, scratching his head. 

“Don’t be,” Joon said, taking his hand and pulling him close.  Slowly, he leaned forward and wrapped an arm around Seungho’s neck in a half hug.  He could feel the hairs on his neck stand as his heart raced.  He fought the urge to recoil as he closed his eyes and leaned into the hug.

He hadn’t said a single word to Seungho yet, but the truth was… physical touches terrified him.  His logical mind knew that it was Seungho he was hugging… that it was Seungho he was touching.  But his physical reaction was a strong rejection against the sensation.  His skin crawled every time Seungho got too close.  And while he was okay with holding hands and such, he physically shivered when they tried to hug.

It frustrated him that he could no longer stand to be physically close to the one he loved.  It didn’t make sense to him in his mind.  Like the irrational fear one felt after waking up from a nightmare, he was helpless to the terror that ran through him every time a stranger looked at him or got too close. 

He hadn’t told Seungho the details of what he’d experienced.  He didn’t see the point in sharing gruesome details; he could barely remember any of it anyway.  He just… wanted to get better, both physically and mentally.  In an effort to get over this physical fear, he made an effort to get close to Seungho himself.  Like now, he pressed his body against Seungho’s and suppressed the shiver that ran through his body.

His eyes snapped open as he felt gentle hands on his shoulders pushing him away.  He looked at Seungho in surprise as he was gently pushed back.

“Don’t force yourself,” Seungho said softly, brushing a thumb across Joon’s cheek, “There’s no rush.”  He smiled gently pinched Joon’s cheeks.  He leaned in slowly and stuck his chin out waiting for Joon to give him a kiss instead of pressing forward like usual.

Joon felt his heart swell with emotion at the small gesture of understanding.  Slowly, he also leaned forward and pressed his lips gently against Seungho’s.  Opening his eyes, he stared into Seungho’s eyes as the latter gave him a small smile.  Returning it, Joon pressed forward again with another kiss.  Hesitantly, he placed a hand on Seungho’s shoulder.  He sighed in relief as he felt himself relax.

“Thank you,” he said softly.  He took a shaky breath as Seungho placed a hand over his. 

Seungho smiled and glanced at the bags on the floor.  “Let’s get this stuff cleaned up.  You can go take a shower,” he said, “Do you need a hand?”

“I’m fine,” Joon said quickly, a little embarrassed, “I can shower by myself.”

Seungho raised an eyebrow and looked at his cast.  “Are you sure?” he asked, “I’m worried about your cast…”

“I can do it myself,” Joon insisted.  Before Seungho protest some more, he shuffled off into the bedroom.  Sighing, he searched the closet for a fresh towel.  He heard Seungho rustle around in the living room as he unpacked his books and bags.  Quietly, he slipped out of the bedroom and into the bathroom, closing the door behind him with a soft click.

Taking a deep breath, Joon began to undress.  Gingerly, he lifted the shirt from his head, wincing as a dull ache spread through his collarbone.  Having discarded his shirt, he squirmed out of his pants and shorts before tossing them into the hamper.  He tried to avoid looking into the mirror but he couldn’t help his eyes as they trailed to his reflection.

He let out a shaky breath as he looked at his body.  Most of the bruising had faded to patches of green; only a few around his ribs were still purple.  He hadn’t sustained many cuts so there weren’t a lot of scarring from that but scabs and pink healing scars were littered all over his body.  He couldn’t really remember it but the doctors had told him they resembled cigarette burns.  They covered his chest, his abdomen, his arms, his thighs… they were everywhere.  A small surgical scar spread across his lower abdomen just above his left hipbone.  That was where the doctor had performed the surgery to stop his internal bleeding.

Turning, Joon surveyed his back.  There were still several light purple bruises on the back of his thighs as well as buttocks.  He had healed fast enough that going to the washroom was no longer a problem but his hips still carried finger bruises.

Joon touched one of the cigarette burns on his abdomen and shuddered.  His skin crawled at his own touch and he quickly stopped.  He was glad he couldn’t remember too much.  All he’d remembered from the days he was locked away was the darkness and the grotesque sounds of .  He remembered pain enough to make him wish he would die.  Most of it was fuzzy and flashes of images in his mind.  He was grateful he couldn’t remember much more than that.

Deciding that a bath was probably more doable than a shower, Joon gingerly stepped into the bathtub and filled it with water.  As he waited for the tub to fill, he couldn’t help but run his fingers over the scars.  They felt strange and foreign underneath his fingers.  He suddenly felt glad he hadn’t let Seungho help him bathe.  If Seungho had seen the scars, would he become disgusted?  

Leaning back against the tub, Joon watched as hot water poured out of the tap and filled the tub.  He was exhausted.  Although he had healed up quickly, the move from the hospital back to the apartment had used up all of his energy.  Being home for the first time in nearly a month, Joon felt every muscle in his body finally relax as he closed his eyes and let the warmth seep into his bones.  Letting out a soft sigh, he positioned his arm on the edge of the tub and let his mind go blank.

Seungho pulled off the sheets from the bed as he tidied up the bedroom.  He was both excited and nervous at the prospect of spending the night with Joon in his arms again.  It had been nearly two months since they shared such intimacy.  It would be strange and probably difficult for Joon to be in such close contact with someone again but… Seungho couldn’t help the anticipation of falling asleep to Joon’s gentle breaths again.

Speaking of Joon… Seungho peeked down the hall and towards the bathroom.  It had been nearly an hour since Joon went inside… but Seungho hadn’t heard the sounds of a shower.  He had taken quite a long time already…

Biting his lips, Seungho walked up to the door and knocked gently as to not startle him.  “Joon-ah,” he said gently.  When all he received was silence, he asked again, “Joon-ah?  You okay?”  Again, he was met with silence.  Worried, he twisted the door knob to find it unlocked.  Slowly, he pushed the door open and peeked inside.  The room was filled with fog and the walls were thick with condensation.  “Joon-ah?” he asked, taking a step inside.

He approached the tub and gently tugged the curtains back.  His eyes widened as his gaze fell on Joon… who had fallen asleep in the tub with his casted arm dangling off the side.  His mouth hung open as he slept deeply.

Seungho chuckled quietly as he knelt down.  This was the first time in the past few weeks that he’d seen Joon sleep this soundly.  Some nights, Joon would wake every few hours and scramble in the darkness until he spotted Seungho.  Other nights, he had nightmares and would wake up shivering in cold sweat.  Seeing him sleeping in such a relaxed manner filled Seungho with both warmth and heartache.

Gently, Seungho reached out and brushed the wet hair from Joon’s forehead.  He froze, however, when he leaned in close enough to see through the water.  Instead of the lust he had felt the first time he saw Joon , he was filled with anguish and anger as he finally laid eyes on the scars and fading bruises.  The familiar fury bubbled in his chest as he reached out and brushed a finger over one of the burns.  He looked up as Joon stirred from his sleep.

Joon opened his eyes slowly and blinked away the sleep.  He jumped slightly when he noticed Seungho by the tub’s side.  Confusion flashed across his face briefly before he noticed his fingers that had become wrinkled from being in the water for too long.

“Ah,” he said, his voice a bit thick from sleep, “I fell asleep.”  He smiled sheepishly as he glanced at Seungho.  His face fell however, and was quickly replaced with worry as he reached his left hand forward and touched Seungho’s face.  “Hyung,” he murmured softly, “Why are you crying?”

Seungho blinked in surprise as Joon brushed a thumb across his cheek.  He hadn’t realized he was crying.  He reached up and touched his cheek to find it wet.  His vision was slightly blurred as he placed a hand over Joon’s hand.  The anger had long been replaced with anguish and helplessness and it was suffocating him.

“I’m,” Seungho said, his voice cracking, “I’m sorry.”  He brushed a thumb across Joon’s flushed cheeks as he tried to keep his voice steady.  “I’m sorry for not getting to you sooner,” he whispered, his face crumpling as tears began to fall from Joon’s eyes, “I’m sorry for not chasing after you that day.  I’m s-sorry for fighting over my own stupid insecurities that day.”  He paused as his chest heaved with a sob.  “And I’m so… so sorry for being a coward for the past two months,” he murmured as Joon leaned into his touch.

Joon shook his head as his own tears dripped into the tub.  “I’m sorry as well,” he said, his chest heaving, “For putting you in such a tough position.”

Shaking his head, Seungho leaned forward and pulled Joon into a hug.  He was relieved that Joon relaxed into it without any recoil.  He felt Joon’s left arm wrap around his neck.  He buried his face into Joon’s neck as sobs wracked his body.  Silence fell between them, interrupted only by their soft crying.  As they held each other, Seungho felt the weight finally lift from his chest.  

Author's notes:

Yay!  I think I'm over my block!  My inspiration was rediscovered once again thanks to music (no surprise there haha)!  The latter half of this chapter was easy to write as the FEELS just took over my fingers!  The lull in plotline is intentional so take this chapters as a slight breather before we get exciting again!  Thanks for reading again and as usual, please vote!