Weeks had passed. I was being so busy handling the preparation for my wedding that will be held next month. Both of Khun and I were busy and we can barely spending time together. I kind of miss him, though. And lucky I got a day off. I won’t go anywhere, just bumming on the bed will release all of my stress, hopefully.

 

Yoona, Yuri and Taeyeon will help me for my wedding preparation today. I didn’t ask them, though, they offered the help to me and of course I won’t reject it since I was so tired.

 

Speaking of my friends, Yoona was the first person who knew that Khun proposed me. I told her not to tell anyone about this yet, but, she immediately told Yuri right after; and Yuri told our friends about it. I knew it that telling Yoona was a wrong idea. I shouldn’t have told her in the first place.

 

I sighed as I leaned back on the headboard of my bed, crossing my legs and immediately felt the comfort of the bed. It was still eleven in the morning, Yoona went out with Yuri and Taeyeon while I was laying on this bed with a news appeared on the television. I didn’t watch it, though, too tired to do that because all I wanted to do was sleep.

 

But before I closed my eyes, the doorbell rang. I was sure it wasn’t Yoona because she just went out of the apartment around half an hour ago. I removed the blanket and walked out of the room to open the door for whoever it was who disturbing my time.

 

“Hello sleepyhead,”

 

Ouch, it was Khun.

 

“Hello handsome. Well, it's kind of rare, I mean, you are visiting me at home this early.”

 

“So I wasn’t allowed to? Okay, I’m going to go home.” He turned away, about to walk away from me. I chuckled and pulled him by the sleeve.

 

“No, don’t go. I was just kidding. Come in.”

 

Khun grinned widely as he made his way in to the room. He sat on the sofa, turning the television on while I was changing my clothes. There was no way in hell I wear a pajama when Khun was here. But suddenly he called my name from the living room.

 

“Tiffany, isn’t this woman our boss?”

 

“She? Our boss is a HE, Khun.” I slightly giggled if Khun thought that Jaejoong was a woman.

 

“No, look!”

 

I groaned as I made my way to the living room while combing my hair as well. What a surprise when I looked at the screen; a woman who used to be my boss laying on the bed in the hospital room. Yes, it was Jessica laying there. I sat down next to Khun while he wrapped his arm around me without noticing anything from me.

 

I froze, seeing powerless Jessica in the bed with Hara and her parents around the sick woman. Well, the paparazzi was outside of the room of course. I was surprised that they allowed paparazzi in the hospital. Once again, I looked at the television carefully. Jessica was sleeping, her face didn’t look comfortable around those people and I had never seen Jessica’s that kind of face. Her face was pale like she was stressed out. The camera zoomed in to Jessica and I got to see her more clearly.

 

Accidentaly I saw some things on her that looked familiar to me.

 

One of them was wrapped around Jessica’s neck and the other one was wrapped tightly around her ring finger. I remembered them clearly because I used to be the owner of those things.

 

They were a necklace and a couple ring that Jessica gave to me.

 

The necklace was the one that I wanted to buy but I didn’t have so much money to buy that thing, and in the end, Jessica was the one who bought it for me. And the ring was our couple ring, yet I didn’t have it now because I gave it back to Jessica back then when we fought, but I remembered it clearly. And for some reasons I always wanted it back—until I met Khun and I forgot about them all.

 

But Jessica reminded me of those two things. Jessica wore those things that I used to wear. She wore our couple ring instead of her wedding ring.

 

And I started wondering since when she wore them.

 

My tears suddenly flowing out of my eyes down my cheeks. Seeing Jessica’s face made me so sad. She looked so powerless in that bed; her forehead frowned but eyes remained close. What happened to her? Was she overworked? Was she diagnosed a disease? After I didn't see her in years and when I got something about her was this painful news.

 

Khun turned to me, slightly gasped when he saw me crying all of sudden.

 

“H-Hey Tiffany, why are you…” But he quickly pulled me closer to him before saying anything more.

 

My heart ached so much seeing Jessica. I know I shouldn’t cry in front of my fiance—moreover the reason I cried was Jessica, my ex. But Jessica looked so damn weak, skinnier, and pale; how I wish I knew the reason behind all of this.

 

I began stuttering in Khun’s embrace, my tears kept flowing out until I realized the news wasn’t showing about Jessica anymore.

 

“Khun, can you come over next time? I’m very tired and I need to rest.” I spatted it out to Khun without even thinking. My mind wasn’t working properly and I knew I had to be alone to clean this out of my mind.

 

“S-Sure.”

 

Khun walked to the front door, turned his head to me who’s still hugging my knees in the sofa and staring blankly at the TV. I can hear he sighed before saying ‘see you tomorrow’ to me. As Khun closed the door, I cried again, burying my face to my knees and letting out my sadness. Just by remembering Jessica’s face that laying on the bed made me crying like a child who just lost her favorite toy.

 

Was she sick? As far as I know, even though Jessica sick, she didn’t want to be in a hospital, unless she was in critize condition. But Jessica never been in a hospital because she hated it.

 

And that necklace and our couple ring. What was that? If Hara found it, she will definitely kill me.

 

Before I continued sulking over Jessica, I got off of the sofa and ran to my room, grabbing my phone to text someone who crossed in my mind when it comes to Jessica. I needed to talk to her right now.

 

 

To: Taeng

11.41 AM

“Let’s meet up in the coffee shop near our office. Don’t ask me why, just get your there when you’re already finished, okay? Love ya!”

 

*

 

I sat by the window, staring to the street with so much people strolling around with umbrella in their hand. It was raining so hard but didn’t stop people to do their activities. As long as they had umbrella in their hand, they were fine.

 

The coffee shop didn’t really crowded by people, surprisingly quite empty than usual. I didn’t mind, it even made me more comfortable to be there.

 

The bell on the front door chimed, signing that there’s a customer walked in. And it was Taeyeon who was searching for me. She finally walked toward my direction when I raised my hand to let her know where I was sitting at. Her smile grew wider each steps. She put down her satchel on the desk before sitting across to me. I was wondering why she didn’t order something before coming here.

 

“Why didn’t you order something?”

 

“I don’t feel like to have one. I’m full.” She replied as she removed her kind-of-wet coat. I mumbled while sipping my coffee and Taeyeon stared at me with that sort-of-drooling look before she got up and walked to the barista desk. I knew this was going to happen eventually, that was why I sipped a coffee right after she said she didn’t want a coffee. It was a lie.

 

I didn’t know since when, but Taeyeon loved coffee and it was impossible for her not to drink a glass for a day.

 

I chuckled as I took a glance of her that queueing while make a “damn you, Tiffany” face to me.

 

Few minutes later, she sat back across to me as she hold a coffee paper cup. She sighed, still not leaving that fierce stare at me.

 

“What?” I asked, chuckling over her.

 

“Damn you for making me bought this damn coffee.”

 

“I didn’t ask you to do that!”

 

“But you do know that coffee is my weakness!”

 

“Then blame your weak side for not be able to control your lust for coffee.” I said in defense.

 

“Shut up.” She grunted while stirring her coffee. “So what’s up? I thought you were too tired to get your out of the bed.”

 

“I was, but I have to tell you something.”

 

“Is it really important that you couldn’t tell me through the phone?”

 

“Goddammit, just listen to me first, Kim Taeyeon.”

 

She laughed before saying ‘okay okay, I’m sorry’. Taeyeon really know how to get on my nerves in this kind of situation. I almost forgot what I wanted to say to her.

 

“I saw Jessica o—“

 

“WHAT?! WHERE!?” She yelled as got up of the seat as well because of the shockness. I buried my face on my palms, feeling embarrassed because I can feel every eyes in the coffee shop were on us—practically on Taeyeon.

 

“Shush! Why were you yelled!?”

 

“I-I’m sorry, but where did you see her??”

 

“On TV.”

 

hung open, staring at me in disbelief that I saw Jessica on TV, not in the street or somewhere in this world. She must be felt embarrassed after what she did; yelled in the coffee shop. I took a sip of my coffee, strangely feeling nervous because Taeyeon somehow looked blank that I think she will explode in no time.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me!?” She hissed, stepped on my foot until I grimaced. For God’s sake she wore heels!

 

“You suddenly yelled and how did you expect me to finish my words!?”

 

“Whatever.” She lost and mumbling something that probably some cursing words. “So how is Jessica? I kinda miss her.”

 

I lowered my head, staring at my coffee which its steam slowly disappeared. For some reasons, I began feeling confused about how to say it to Taeyeon.

 

“She is hospitalized.”

 

“What? What happened to her?”

 

“I also don’t know. Khun was the first who saw it on TV and when I looked at it, it was Jessica,” I slightly feel nothing but sad when I said that. Everything on the screen crossed in my mind; Jessica’s pale face, how her body transformed into a body like where it was only bones were there, also the necklace and the ring.

 

Oh, the necklace and the ring!

 

“And I saw two things on Jessica.”

 

“What are they?”

 

“Jessica wore a necklace that she gave to me and she also wore our couple ring.”

 

“I-I don’t get it, why does she wear them when she already gave it to you?” She asked me confusedly.

 

“Indeed she gave me, but I turned them back the day when we broke up, when I figured out she got engaged.”

 

Taeyeon hummed, staring at me over the cup of her coffee before she gulped it down. I knew she was thinking of words to be said to me.

 

“And I just realized, why were you crying?”

 

“I was sad, Taeyeon. Her face was so pale, powerless on the hospital bed, her frowned forehead, her skinny body, moreover when I saw that necklace and the ring.”

 

This time, Taeyeon put down the cup of coffee that previously she held to the desk, staring at me with that stare that sometimes scares me to death.

 

“Let me get this straight, you still love her, don’t you?”

 

“I don’t! I love Khun. What are you thinking?” For a moment, I forgot that Taeyeon was a mindreader and it was a totally useless when I told a lie. Even though I didn’t lie, at all. I love Khun, that’s the point and I didn’t love a person who already had a wife despite she wore two things that used to be mine. Like seriously?

 

“Then why are you bringing me here to talk about her?”

 

“I just wanted to let you know because she is hospitalized. Is that wrong?”

 

“No, not at all. But Krystal might be the right person to let me know about this since she is her sister instead of you. Am I right?” She inquired.

 

I cursed under my breath, didn’t expect that Taeyeon will say those things. And for a reason, my heart sank that her words were sharp as a knife. She expected me that I still loved Jessica until this time—after three years ago since that incident in America. No, I didn’t. I had Khun now and I loved him, not Jessica. She was my past that needed to be replaced.

 

“It’s clearly that Jessica still love you after three years. You saw it with your own eyes that she wore things that used to be yours, right Tiffany?” I nodded hesitately. “Then what does it mean?”

 

My mouth didn’t move even though I wanted to answer Taeyeon, but those words didn’t come out. I was too afraid to say that.

 

“Jessica still loves you, even though she has Hara. She has a wife. God, what are you even thinking when you decided to not fight for Jessica?” Taeyeon facepalmed.

 

My heart belongs to you, Tiffany.

 

“I’m still wondering why you didn’t fight for her back then, when she had her best to—”

 

“Stop! Please don’t bring that topic. I have had enough with that question of yours, Taeyeon. You always spatted me with th—“ Her words came to a halt.

 

“Because you were stupid!” I startled when she said that. “There, I said it after I held it for three--no, four years!”

 

Taeyeon’s face looked so red because she was mad. I think it was me who should mad at her because she didn’t help me with this thing at all. We ended up arguing in the coffee shop where I thought it would supposed to be our quality time.

 

“If you have a time to fight for Jessica, would you do it, Tiffany?”

 

I shut my eyes, thinking so hard to answer that damn question. For me, that was the scariest and hardest question to be answered. Khun was in my mind since we started talking about this thing.

 

“I…don’t know”

 

“I have no idea why did you let Jessica go from your life when you loved her as well and moved on to Khun that easily.” She added.

 

“Easily? It took me almost a year to move on from her!”

 

“A year? Didn’t you tell me that you know him for only three months and you date him?” Taeyeon narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

 

“Yes, but I tried to love him and it worked after few years. Now I love him very much that I think I will die living without him.”

 

“You are using Khun, right?”

 

“I’m not! What are you thinking? I really love him!”

 

“At first, your intention was to move on from Jessica and you had no idea that you will love him eventually. Although Jessica is still there, staying in the smallest part of your heart all the time.”

 

“Enough! I don’t want to argue about it anymore. What’s done is done. Probably this is what God has prepared for me.” I said as I stood up, taking my satchel with me before walked to the front door. Taeyeon didn’t stop me, she just sipping her coffee as she controlled herself not to spat another harsh words at me. “You know nothing about my feelings, Taeyeon.”

 

But when I walked passing her, she grabbed my wrist.

 

“You have to choose between Khun and Jessica. You can’t have both of them and I’m sure you are not a greedy woman.” I looked at her for the last time at that day. I let her hand go from my wrist, but she quickly grabbed the hem of my jacket. “One more thing. God might have decided your life, but you also can change it if you want to.”

 

And her grip loosened. I stood there for few seconds before frantically walking out of the coffee shop. As I stepped out, I welcomed by the heavy rain that I forgot it had not stopped yet. My clothes drenched but I didn’t care, I kept walking home without bothering those weird stares that being shot at me.

 

*

 

“Khun, I’m so sorry about this morning. I didn’t mean to cast you out. I just--“

 

“It’s okay. I should have told you earlier that I wanted to come over.” He chuckled through the phone. “Can I visit you next time?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Great.” Was the only word that came from Khun’s mouth, and I wondered if he mad at me but he held it, trying not to show it to me.

 

“I’m sorry, Khun”

 

“Hey, it’s okay. Chill, I’m not mad.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Really really sure, Tiffany.” He giggled again, somehow made me smile as well when I heard his giggle. “I love you.”

 

This time, I felt a pang in my heart when he said that. I was sure it was because Taeyeon’s voice rung in my head.

 

You are using Khun, right?

 

“I-I love you too.”

 

You have to choose between Khun and Jessica

 

I curled up on my bed when the line went off, dropping my phone and hugging my knees. If I remembered Khun’s innocent face, it made me feel more hurt. I never thought Taeyeon will say such words to me, probably she had reached her limit as well. Jessica randomly popped out from nowhere to my life again. She appeared again when I already had moved on from her.

 

Probably Taeyeon was right about the smallest part of my heart still wanted Jessica, but it was impossible. I had Khun and Jessica had Hara the witch. Jessica was already married while I was going to marry Khun within few weeks. It had been three years and it went smoothly before; exactly before Jessica appeared in the television this morning that informing me she was hospitalized and I went to Taeyeon to talk about this, that I think it was my biggest mistake to ever have a thought to talk to Taeyeon.

 

Perhaps I was greedy. I was greedy for loving both Jessica and Khun. I already gave my everything to Khun and I believed he was the one for me, but today, Jessica appeared in my life again and showed me a sign that she still loved me after three years being separated. I was happy about it, but I realized that I can’t return her feelings this time.

 

What do you want, Jessica Jung? Why did you keep making my life become so complicated by your presence in my life? I was so happy before, until I saw you in hospital—no, until I talked to that midget and she made me having those inexplicable thoughts about you again.

 

Khun and I already had a long journey and we almost reached the goal, we can’t just stop in the middle of the way. But I didn’t know who should I choose although in my heart I wished I have a time machine and I could rewind everything, so I didn't have to meet these two and won't fall in love with them. I would have chose someone else and lived happily ever after without thinking of these s.

 

Follow your heart.

 

Yes, of course I will follow my heart.

 

 

 

 

TBC

a/n: hi? hoho updated. im sorry, i was planning to update last week, but my internet was error -_- omg so many angry comments lmfao but im not gonna say anything~ thank you for those who decided to continue reading this fanfic :* btw im sorry for grammar error, hope you guys like it :] do PM me if you don't understand something ^^