I didn’t meet Jessica yesterday. I completely ran away from her because I need to cool down my head. No, I didn’t get pissed because of Hara's announcement about the wedding was accelerated three weeks earlier. From three years and it became three weeks. My heart wasn't ready to accept that Jessica is going to be someone else’s wife in the next three weeks. It means I no longer have a chance. Looks like I was going to give her to Hara completely.

 

I never had a thought my life will be this complicated because of someone.

 

“Tiff?”

 

I turned my head to the source. It was a figure that I haven’t saw in a long time.

 

“Gyul!”

 

Gyuri appeared in the coffee shop near my apartment. What was she doing here though? I got up from my seat and hugged this blonde girl immediately. I missed her.

 

“What are you doing? Isn’t here quite far from your place?”

 

“I had a meeting with my clients and unluckily they wanted me to go to their place.”

 

I hummed as I look at Gyuri who was placing herself in the chair in front of mine. She looked so gorgeous today. But in my opinion, Gyuri was gorgeous everyday. She crossed her legs, staring at me with that creepy smile of hers.

 

“What’s wrong with you?” She asked.

 

“Eh? Is something wrong with me?”

 

“Oh please, I could read your face easily, Tiffany Hwang. Did you forget that I know you TOO well?” Urgh, that pressure in her tone. Even though that was the truth.

 

“Nothing.” I leaned back on my chair, scrolling down on my phone.

 

“Tell me what bothers you. You have caught and you can’t runaway from me.”

 

I confused. Should I tell her or not? This was about Jessica and I didn’t want someone outside the office know that. I didn’t say anything, until Gyuri spoke up.

 

“Is this about Jessica?” I bet she was just guessing.

 

Again, I didn’t give her any response. I did feel guilty about doing this to Gyuri since she was my bestfriend, but I can’t just tell her about my problem with Jessica. Dilemma.

 

“It’s okay, Gyul. You don’t have to worry.”

 

“Okay,” She wasn't going to give up that easily. “I will leave you alone then. Looks like my presence here was uninvited.” Gyuri rose from the seat. I didn’t have a thought that she will use that classic way. I grabbed her wrist, telling her not to go and she was back to her seat.

 

I was confused. I could just not mention Jessica’s name in front of her, but she will know that I was telling her a story about Jessica. I had been caught and I can’t runaway again. She was true.

 

I let out a deep sigh as Gyuri place her elbow on the arm of the chair, patiently wait as she know that I’ll tell her the story.

 

“Just let it out, Tiffany. You often bottle up your feelings, don’t you?”

 

I nodded.

 

“Gyul, what would you do when someone you loves were taken away from you?” Before she answer my question, her eyes widened as she heard my question.

 

“Did you broke up with Jessica?”

 

“Yeah, last week.”

 

“Do you still love her?”

 

“Yes, I do. And I think I always be.”

 

Gyuri crossed her arms. Looks like she didn’t believe my story, but that wasthe actual fact. I broke up with Jessica while I’m here, still loving her with all my heart. I knew I should let her go since she was going to be married three weeks later, but my heart still doesn’t want to take the truth that she will going to be someone else’s wife, soon.

 

As the clock keep ticking, I know it was getting closer to the date where Jessica and Hara are going to be an official couple. Every seconds were precious for me, but I was still sit here, thinking that slowly I realize I’m not meant to be with Jessica.

 

“I know you aren’t telling me the whole story, but it’s okay. I only need the point though.”

 

“I’m sorry,”

 

“I told you it’s okay. Sometimes you need a privacy too. I’m sorry if I forced you to tell me about your problem, but actually, I’m sick of the fact that you always did that.”

 

“Did what?”

 

“Bottle up your feelings and let your heart hurts.”

 

I clammed up, burying my face on my palms as Gyuri’s words were slowly getting inside of me. She knew me too well even though we were live separated. Just by seeing my expressions, she could read everything. Yes, everything. I think her ability was more awesome than Taeyeon’s.

 

Gyuri moved closer to me, looking at me in the eye that I think it made me a bit nervous.

 

“Hey Tiffany,” She called. “You really love Jessica, don’t you?”

 

“Yeah,”

 

“And you don’t want her to walk away from you? From your life either?”

 

“Yes,”

 

“Then fight for it.”

 

I looked up to see the blonde girl in front of me, who was smiling widely to me.

 

“You need to fight for your heart, or for Jessica’s sake too. Be positive that you could win this game so you could get Jessica in your life again.”

 

I will if I could, but… I just can’t. I didn’t know what to do.

 

I...screwed up.

 

* 

 

The apartment was so quite. No lights were on and I bet Yoona hadn’t came home from her campus. I raised my wrist, looked at my watch as it showed me a “7 PM” with its digital font. I took off my coat and placed it on the chair, taking a seat in my comfy sofa. I closed my eyes, enjoying the silence of my room. Sometimes this is all what I need. A silent room.

 

Until I heard the bell rang, making me groaned as I walked towards the door. Ah, Yoona was so impatient. She was pressing the bell button continuously and it was so noisy. I twirled the door knob, pulling the door wider for Yoona.

 

“Stop pressing the butto—whoa!” I was pushed backwards and fell to the ground. This person was wearing a black jacket and it was quite wet. Looks like it was caused from the heavy snow that melted on it.

 

“Yoong, what are you doing!? You didn’t need to push me like that.”

 

I slowly pushed her away from me and got up to clean myself, even though I haven’t changed my clothes as well.

 

“Yoong? It’s me, Fany-ah.” This voice…

 

She untucked the hoodie. It was her. It was Jessica who was standing in front of me with that wet jacket wrapped around her body. I had no idea why Jessica was here, coming to my place out of the blues.

 

“W-what are you doing here, Jessica?”

 

“What am I doing? Of course I wanted to meet you.” She walked closer to me, wanting to hug me but I moved backwards.

 

Her eyes gave me so much disappointment as she saw me walked away from her. Clearly enough that I didn’t want her presence here. But I didn’t know why my body did it. I think I was just scared of what Hara said to me two days ago. She had her eyes everywhere. She was secretly eyeing me, wasn’t she?

 

“Why are you walking away from me? Don’t you miss me, Fany-ah?”

 

“N-no.”

 

“Don’t worry, Hara doesn’t know this place. That’s why I’m wearing this jacket, to cover me up.” I became relaxed as I heard that. Jessica walked to the windows, closing all the curtains. I knew what she did is for our sake too. And I was positive we were safe in my apartment. At least, for now. I can do anything with Jessica without scared of anything since Jessica said Hara didn’t know this place. Jessica sneaked out as well.

 

“Wait here. I’m going to make something for you.”

 

But when I was walking to the kitchen, a pair of hand sneaked in between my arms and hugged me tightly from behind. No more wet jacket on her. There’s only a warmth from Jessica’s body.

 

“It’s okay. I only need you to be with me right now, Fany-ah. I don’t need something else. I need you.”

 

Jessi…

 

We didn’t do anything, but standing near my circle dining table as Jessica keep hugging me. And she dragged me to the sofa. I knew what she wanted to do. Cuddling.

 

I brought up a blanket over our legs. Jessica turned off the lamp and switched it with the dim ones. It felt so romantic for me. I could hear Jessica’s soft breath. Her chest that moving up and down as she was breathing. Her scent that getting inside of me, making me more calm because this was one of those reasons why I love Jessica. Yes, her scent—her y scent. Our legs tangled together under the blanket. Her soft skin was brushed against mine.

 

Having Jessica’s arms around me, hugging me like she doesn’t want me to go; and I couldn’t ask for more.

 

I would like to do this with Jessica before her wedding, before she was officialy going to be Hara’s wife.

 

“Jessi,”

 

“Hm?”

 

“I want to ask you something. Can I?”

 

“No, you can’t.”

 

I looked up to her. She was giggling cutely before placing a soft kiss on my temple.

 

“You can ask anything to me.”

 

“Why are you keep coming to me even though you have a fiance and going to be married?”

 

She chuckled. “What a stupid question,”

 

Jessica brought me closer before answering the question and my hand rested gently on her chest.

 

“It’s because I love you. Isn’t it obvious?”

 

“But you are going to be married, Jessi. Doesn’t Hara keep following you everywhere to her buying the needs for the weeding?”

 

“Why should I? I don’t want to do that if it wasn’t you. You are the only one I want to get married with, Tiffany.”

 

Oh sweet lord, I’m going to crazy hearing her cheesy confession.

 

“But your wedding is three more weeks, right? It’s getting closer due the ticking time.”

 

“Three more weeks?” She laughed mockingly. “What are you talking about? It’s still three more years and it won’t happen. It’s only in Hara’s dream.”

 

My eyes widened. Hasn’t she known about her wedding that was accelerated?

 

“Jessi, didn’t you know that your wedding is accelerated?”

 

“What?”

 

I got up from my seat and walked to my room to get the invitation that Hara gave to me couple days ago. Jessica still sitting cutely, hugging her knees as she moved her head to the right and left. So cute, I murmured.

 

She clung her right hand around my neck, leaning closer and placing kisses on my cheek that slowly going lower to my neck. I wondered if her expression will change after she look at this invitation. Because my feelings was going to be right, about she hadn’t know about the wedding. Oh damn that named Hara.

 

“Here.” Jessica reached for the invitation and read it carefully.

 

But not long after I sat next to her, she threw the invitation to the floor. I was kind of surprised seeing her attitude. She was mad. Yes, I knew it. Her eyes weren’t showing any love anymore. It showed so much anger in it.

 

I held her hand, trying to calm her down by hugging her.

 

“You didn’t know it, Jessi?” She shook her head. Well, you were going to marry an evil girl, Jessi. She was not good enough for you.

 

“Looks like she has planned it since a long time ago. Of course without me knowing anything. I’m totally clueless about this.” She put her face on her palms. Poor my Jessi, victim of a villain that none other was her fiance.

 

“Hey Jessi,”

 

She looked at me with those sad eyes, which make me want to punch Hara hard in the face because she was the reason of this mess. My heart ached seeing Jessica’s face. She looked so tired of this , caused by her fiance whom she doesn’t love.

 

“May I know the story when you met Hara for the first time?”

 

Jessica slumped down the sofa. Her eyes closed like she didn’t want to tell the story. But I didn’t force her. It was her conclusion if she want to tell me or not.

 

“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” I snuggled on her.

 

“I think you need to know.”

 

“Really?”

 

She nodded. “I lived in California for fifteen years before I moved here. My dad and Hara’s dad were bestfriends and decided to build their own company here. That was their dream. And I met Hara in a dinner event in her house. We became bestfriends as well, just like our parents.”

 

“I loved her and vice versa, and we became a couple for a year…” There was a pang in my heart when I heard this and I unconsciously lowered my head. Looks like Jessica noticed it and she hugged me tighter than before. I had no idea that Jessica used to love her. Both of them were loving each other. “… but, I realized something changed in Hara.”

 

“Something changed?”

 

“Yes, the way she showed her love for me. It was like she obsessed to me."

 

Obsessed?

 

"She got rid of all those people who come near me, even though we were just friends. I think she could sensed that those people likes me and she decided to get rid of them. That’s why I felt kind of lonely at that time because no one wants to be my friends. They are scared of Hara." Wow Hara, you were totally a destroyer of someone’s life.

 

Jessica let out a heavy sigh. This conversation brought her awful memories back and I felt guilty about this. I shouldn't have asked this in the first place.

 

"I couldn't find my love for her anymore. It was just gone and I know it will not come back again. I didn’t want to fight my love for her because it’s not worth it. That's why when I moved here, I felt peace—the real peace because I could went away from her. It was like, I'm free. I didn't locked up in her prison anymore."

 

"Didn't you know about this plan? I mean your wedding that was accelerated"

 

"Like I have said before, I'm totally clueless about this. I didn't expect Hara would come and try to destroy my life again, this fast. I don’t know what brought her here." It’s me, Jessica. She knew all about us.

 

"But both of you are engaged."

 

"About engaged thing, when we were eighteen years old, she once promised something to me."

 

"What was that?"

 

"She told me that we are going to be married when I reach twenty five years old."

 

"Oh god, was she even serious?"

 

"I thought she was joking, but she didn't. Until our parents held an engagement event in USA without my approval first,”

 

“And you just accepted what they are going to do with your life?”

 

“I thought I wouldn’t move on from her, so yeah, I accepted it. And I didn’t know that our parents’ were accepting my relationship with Hara until they held the engagement event. They did it so damn quick.”

 

I put my hand on my face, realizing how innocent Jessica was. She didn’t even try to change her life. She let her parents’ control it at that time. And now, she regretted it.

 

“Until I met you. I feel regret that I let my parents’ to control my life and now, I couldn’t do anything to change it. To cancel this stupid wedding. I don't love Hara at all.” I looked up and caught Jessica was staring at me with her beautiful dark-blue eyes. She gave me so much love just by staring in the eye. It made me sad when I realized Jessica's life is more screwed up than mine. Jessica brought me into her embrace again, planting a kiss on my temple before I made my way up to her neck.

 

“I love you, Tiffany.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

“I wanted you to know, even though I’m going to marry Hara, but my love for you won’t ever ever vanish. Mark my word. You know that I don't love her, right? Because you have took my heart and you are the only person who own it.” And Jessica kissed my lips for the first time today. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything to cancel this wedding. I swear I will if I could, but this is my parents’ decision.”

 

I only nod. Jessica loved me. That was the only thing I need to know. Wasn’t it quite sad when we are loving each other, but predestination cannot help us? Jessica may change it, but she couldn’t because it was her parents’ decision and she can’t do anything about it but obey them.  Jessica was scared of her parents and I didn’t know what was the reason behind it.

 

Due the clock keep ticking, I realized that my love life with Jessica was going to be over. Three weeks going to flow so fast. My tears was in the edge of my eyes and unconsciously it dropped down to my cheek. I hurriedly wipe it before Jessica notice it, but I was too late. She noticed and quickly gave me a kiss on the lips. There was a droplet of tears that landed on my cheek and I know it wasn’t mine. It was Jessica’s.

 

She was crying too. Both of us were crying.

 

This was so sad. A sad love story of us. The story of two people who love each other but they are separated by the third party and the cruel fate.

 

Jessica parted her lips from mine, but I pulled and kissed her again. I wasn't freaking ready to let her go from my life but I had to.

 

Is this going to be our last kiss? I secretly asked myself.

 

*

 

In the random afternoon, I just ate my lunch in the cafeteria. Alone as always for past a week. And when I was the middle of working, there was a knock on my door. I was quite scared if it would be Hara. But I was wrong. They were my friends; Taeyeon, Yuri, Sooyoung and Sunny. I quickly got up from my seat and walked towards them. Their faces were awful and I don't know why.

 

"What's wrong with you, guys?" I asked.

 

"We got this stupid invitation from Jessica's fiance," Sunny answered. I clammed up immediately. I could feel my smile slowly faded but I couldn't do this in front of my friends. I had to stay strong. Even though inside my heart, I couldn't do that.

 

"Are you going to be okay, Tiffany?" Taeyeon and Yuri added. 

 

I lowered my head, trying so hard to hold back my tears. Today, Jessica was going to fly to USA and I had no idea if she would come back within three weeks or she would permanently live there until her wedding. Yesterday was our last quality time. I didn't think she would walked away from me this fast. But she didn't say anything about she was going to USA, so I secretly hoping she would come back to give me a farewell.

 

Yuri pulled me into a hug, but I quickly said, "I'm going to be okay. You don't have to worry about it. I'll be fine." 

 

It was hard to keep smiling even though you were hurt, deeply hurt. Because releasing someone important wasn't that easy as I thought.

 

I knew I'll be fine without Jessica. My life was fine before I met Jessica, right? 

 

So I hope it would back like it used to.

 

I will be fine.

 

I hope so.

 

 

 

 

TBC

a/n: hi? lol updated! xD did you guys get jessica's past story? :o because i think it's quite complicated when i put into words >< well if you don't get it, just send me a PM and i'll explain it to you there :3 sorry for grammar error and hope you guys like this chapter :) have a nice weekend! ♥

@GeeGeeGee: I was surprised seeing your comment because i was going to explain Jessica's past in this chapter but you were already guessing it in your comment XD