“I’m Jessica’s fiancé.”

Fiancé?

I didn’t know what I feel right now. It was like, someone was pouring salt into my wounds. All I wanted to do was roll off a cliff. Some people was like stabbing me in the perfect spot; in my heart. It just broke into a million pieces and I didn’t know if I could arrange them back like it used to. I could feel my tears were going to fall, but I held it as much as possible. There was no way in hell I cry here, in front of them. It was blurry, but I could see Hara was smiling proudly of what she said, while Jessica was stopped at her tracks.

What to believe? Everything was a lie. Jessica’s love, Jessica’s sweet words, when she said she loves me more than anyone else in this world and it was all a lie.

I couldn’t breath for few seconds. Something was stuck in my throat.

 I don’t know who I should trust anymore.

I gave them a fake smile and told them a congratulations. Hara seemed so happy when she thanked me. As soon my business had finished, I told them that I have some works to be done. It was a lie. Because all I wanted to do was get out of this room, lock myself up in my office room and cry as much as I could. All of those happy feelings turned out into a sadness and a disappointment. They were mixed.

Hara waved to me and walked me to the door, while my so-called-girlfriend just stayed in her office; standing there like a stupid statue. I walked towards my office as I kept holding my tears back. I kept lowering my head when I was on my way back to my office room. Hell, I won’t let anyone see that I’m hurt and almost cried like a baby.

My heart was hurt and it was because I trusted Jessica that much. Yuri did say Jessica won’t cheat on me, yet she already have a fiancé. Fiancé was worse than a girlfriend. I wondered if Yuri already knew about this but she hid it.

When I was about to twirl the door knob on my office room, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I thought it was Taeyeon or Yuri or someone else; but I was wrong.

It was Jessica. She followed me. I didn’t know how I feel right now; I was kind of happy that she was following me, but on the other side, I was disappointed with her.

I shrugged, letting her hand off me and walking in to my office; but Jessica stopped me again by grabbing my wrist. This time I couldn’t hold my anger anymore. I was so angry like a time bomb that already reached the time and going to explode.

“Back off, Jessica! Don’t you even dare to touch me!”

“Let me explain, Fany-ah.”

“There’s nothing to be explained! Now I know that you are a liar. You were using me because you were lonely and your fiancé wasn’t around you, right!?”

“What are you talking about? Stop talking nonsense.”

“Get out!” I pushed her, but she managed to hold the door, so it wasn't closed. Jessica was so strong and I fell on the floor. Jessica hurriedly kneeled down, wanting to hug me but I keep walking back to evade her.

“I said back off!”

“I won’t.”

“Jessica, stop it right now,” she stopped, looking at me with that worried look. It’s a fake one. Don’t fall to her trap again, Tiffany. “I-I’m hurt and it’s worse because you are the main reason of it. Stay back.”

“Let me explain to you.”

“What to explain? Your fake feelings towards me?” I almost yelled. My tears and my anger were combined, my voice was creaked. I couldn’t hold my tears anymore and let it fall.

“I love you, Fany-ah. I really do. Why don’t you trust me for it?”

“Trust you for it? Where the hell is your mind, Jessica? I did trust you, but what you have done to me? You have a fiancé! And it’s like you stabbed my back! You knew that I was love you more than anyone and now you did something that broke my heart into pieces.”

“Please, just let me explain about Hara.”

My tears kept falling down on my cheeks. I really can’t hold it anymore and I think I’ve reached my limit. I want to scream as loud as I could. I wanted to punch someone hard on the face. I never thought that someone could make me feel this hurt and this weak until I felt so hopeless.

Jessica slowly moved closer to me but I couldn’t move back because I’ve already hit my table. Why was I being so weak right now? I knew I’m a strong woman and not crying easily by something, but this was too much. I hate being lied and the worse, being cheated by someone whom I love very much and she was already have a fiancé.

“I gave you my fragile heart, Jessica. I trusted you more than anyone that you will keep my heart and I believe you won’t hurt me or anything. I was love you with all my heart and I gave you everything I had. You were the first person who owned my heart because I never give it to anyone,” I said as I place my face on my palms. Jessica was holding me by the shoulders, but again, I shrugged it off. I didn’t want her to touch me. Not anymore.

You were my first love.

“but why you did you disappoint me?” She kept quiet, exactly doesn’t have anything to say to me. She was so disappointing. I didn’t trust her anymore. “I thought you could keep me wrapped around you and you could protect me from anything, but I was wrong. Totally wrong.”

“It’s like you treated me like a , who could being dated for a while when your partner isn’t around. And it’s hurt if I remember what we did three days ago,” I was being honest. It hurt me if I remember of it. “We made love, Jessica. I shouldn’t have let you do that to me. I was tricked by your sweetness and everything. That was my biggest fault.”

“I love you, Fany—“

“Don’t call me Fany-ah! You are nobody now.” I pulled out our couple rings and removed the necklace that she had given to me from my neck.

“We are over, Miss Jung.”

*

I sat on my bed, bringing my knees to my chest and hugged them. My eyes were swollen up because I can’t stop crying since this noon. Yoona was worried when she saw my eyes. She tried to cheer me up, but I needed to be alone. I didn’t want to tell Yoona about this. I’m not ready.

“I’m Jessica’s fiancé.”

Hara’s words rung again. It was like, it won’t get out of my mind for awhile. I buried my face onto my knees, feeling the tears were falling down again and wetting my legs. I wished I could stop it, but I know I couldn’t. I was extremely hurt.

Even though we were still three weeks and most of them Jessica left me to overseas, but I already had so much memories with her; even when we weren’t yet dating. Was it because I loved her too much and never think about the negative thoughts like this?

There are other fishes in the sea.

No, it was not that easy to forget Jessica. I hate her, but I love her. She was my special one beside Yoona.

“How could you do this to me, Jessica?” I cried even harder, wanting to release all of my pain by crying but I know it wouldn’t enough. Moving on was not easy, especially from Jessica, a person whom I loved so much.

I slid in to my blanket, wanting to sleep because my eyes were tired of crying. I hoped I won’t cry in my sleep. But before I close my eyes, I heard a knock on my door. I got up of my bed lazily and walked to the door. I think it was Yoona.

I was wrong, again. This was the second time though.

“Fany-ah,”

Yes, it was the girl who broke my heart into a million pieces. The girl who made the black hole in my heart grew again. The girl who made my life suddenly turned into a darkness. Without hesitation, I slammed the door harshly. I freaking don’t want to see her face; because it will hurt me a lot.

“Fany-ah, please open the door! I want to talk to you.”

“Go away!”

“I won’t until you come out.”

“Stop it already! You make me sick!”

“Fany-ah, let me explain about that.”

“How many times do I have to tell you that there’s nothing to be explained!? Everything was clear!”

“Of course there is. Come out and I’ll explain it all to you. It was a misunderstand!”

“I don’t care. Just go away!”

There was a silence for few seconds. I realized my tears were falling down again. Stop hurting my heart, Jessica. Your attendance here just make it worse.

“Fany-ah, don’t you love me anymore?”

I do, idiot! Of course I do love you, but you broke my heart with this thing.

“I don’t! Go away right now!” My mouth said the different one.

“I know you lied.”

“You know nothing about me. Stop pretending like you know me more than anyone else just because you were my girlfriend.”

“But I do. I know you so much.”

“God damn it, you are not!” I slammed the door with my fist and I hope she know how emotional I was right now and she would leave.

“I love you, Tiffany.” She whispered, but I heard it clearly.

“Stop lying and go to your fiancé. You are nobody for me now, Miss Jung. Don’t come to me anymore or it will make me guilty because I took someone else’s fiancé.”

She kept silence. I didn’t care about her anymore and went to the bed. Looked like I was going to cry endlessly. I didn’t even know when will I stop crying for her. It wasted my time. She knocked the door again for several times, but I didn’t give a damn for it. I closed my eyes tightly, holding back my tears for not keep coming but it’s useless.

I can’t stop crying…

Why…

*

It was six in the morning already. I think I had passed that phase—that annoying phase; crying hard. I got no mood to go to the office anymore and so damn hard to go there. But if she doesn’t there, I don’t mind. I just didn’t want to see her face. The face of a liar and a cheater.

I dragged my feets out of the room and how the view startled me. Did I just see Jessica’s figure sleeping on my couch with a blanket on?

Yes, I just did.

Jessica was sleeping on my couch with a blanket on. I frowned. I think Yoona was the one who allowed her sleeping here. Well, who else?

I quickly went to Yoona’s room. She was still sleeping, but I woke her up by shaking her body.

“What’s wrong?”

“Why the hell did you allow her to sleep here!?”

“She did leave after she talked to you. Until I heard something fell on the floor and it hit the door. It was her, sleeping outside! How could I let her sleep there, unnie!?”

“You could have told her to leave, Yoong!”

“What happened to you guys actually?”

“You don’t need to know.”

“Maybe not now, but someday I will.”

I clammed up. I didn’t know what to do. But just hearing the confession about Jessica slept outside doesn’t make me feel pity to her. Hell no.

I was thinking to leave my apartment as soon as possible, but I was late because Jessica was already woke up. She caught me when I was walked out of Yoona’s room. Jessica was sitting on the couch, rubbing her eyes.

If only she is still mine, I’d hug her and peppering her with morning kiss like she always wanted to. And let her to sleep in my room, not in the couch; with me in her embrace.

My heart said that, but the fact was hurt. She was taken by someone and they were going to be married. Sad knowing that her partner was not me, but someone else who may love and know her better than me.

“Tiffany,”

I walked into my room and closed the door, leaving her without saying a single word. My warn had supposed to be enough, but she didn't give up—or not yet.

Remembering how sad Jessica’s face before, tears started pouring down my cheeks. There it is. It came again. Stupid tears.

In outside, I might be a who hate Jessica that much and disgusted of her. Everything she does, it piss me off. But inside, I want to hate her like my appearance to everyone, but I just can’t. I can’t lie to my own feelings that I still love her even though she was engaged. I’ve been such a two-faced.

Not again. I’ve done that before I wasn’t Jessica’s.

*

Office was not that crowded as always it used to. I didn’t see many people passing by in the lobby. I was not late anyway. I finally made it to the office after ignoring Jessica all the time. Well, I didn’t eat the breakfast though and it made me bought some sandwiches from convenience store.

When I was walking in the hall, I met Taeyeon and Yuri who were talking together. Luckily they didn’t notice me, or else my swollen eyes would be caught up and they will ask me this and that.

I really needed someone to talk to about this, but I had no idea who it is. There was no plan for telling my friends about this, because I think I should bottle them up and let Jessica to be the one who tell them about her—or us.

But as I was preparing my stuff on the table, I remembered someone who I can ask something about Jessica and her fiance.

I need to meet her after work.

TBC

a/n: hi hi hi~~ updated! i'm not in hurry this time lmao *even too free* xD i hope u guys like this chapter :) by the way, let me give you all bandaids to ur jeti heart 3 i was hurt when i wrote this chapter :/ and i'll leave to your imagination who's the girl that tiffany going to meet hehehe okay, enough talking lol sorry for grammar error >< and feel free to send a PM if u don't understand something in this chapter. have a nice weekend, guys :)