KHJ POV

Jae stubbornly moved my belonging to his house... he said he want me to live with him ...i didnt know why i just follow his order...deep in my heart i know that i ve forgiven him.. but my pride didnt allow me to forgive him...he try his best since i move in.... he will be back as soon as his work is over, he didnt attend any party anymore...if he will spend nights outside, he will send mr full report with pictures.. mmm.... why im being so stubborn.... may be i dont want to be hurt again... or may be i dont trust him enough to give him my heart again....

today is his birthday... i m waiting for him to come home...he s doing drama these few weeks... the shooting location is quite far away... but he always come back.. he insisted that he dont want to miss a single minutes from the 3 months of our agreement... but today he is late....mmmm did he went with his friend to celebrate his birthday... did he got drunk... did he forgot that i m waiting for him at home... or did he got stuck with girls and cannot come home? mmm... why didnt he called me like always??

where is he?  it past 12... but he s not here......last time he called i heard girls voices behind him.. and he cannot speak because the place is so noisy, why his hand phone is off now... did he betray me again... god...

its 3 am .... he still not here, his phone is off... i called the shooting location.. they said he left the place early.....back to seoul already... i called his manager, he said he left Jae at the company before 12  because they have a small surprise birthday party for him.... that before 12....but now its 3 am..... where did he go...... is he sleeping with someone......he hurt my heart again.........

i shouldnt listen to him... i shouldnt met him again... why i m soo stupid...... ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.... why i m a fool to belief that he will change.. he will hurt my heart again and again... doing the same thing..... why?????.................

at 4 am.... i m sobbing in my room... my tears dried away... i m sobbing without tears..... it hurt so much........ the pain is attacking my nerve..... i felt numb all over............. why i m so kind hearted..... even if i really love him... whta the point of loving him if i know that i will be hurt like this over and over again...... Jae.... u really take me for granted didnt u??/ because i forgive u so easily... u just do it again... hurting me seemed like a small mistake for u , because u know that after begging and pleading i will forgive u..... this is hurt..... its hurt...............

i m really mad at my self... it is nearly 5am in the morning.....

i heard a sound... the main door opened... i heard his voice....

i heard he knock my door.... i lay down pretend to sleep....

"hyun joong..... sorry.... i m late today..... "

i didnt move.... i heard he closed the door, so he just say that???!!!!!!

my head is spinning.... i m really dizzy.... i felt asleep with tears in my eyes.....

i dont care... i will move out today.....

in the morning.... when i opened my door... he is no where to be seen..... i just start to pack my things.... i cannot stay here anymore....

suddenly the house phone ringing... i pick it up.. it is his manager

"jung... where is Jae?"

"he s not home, why?"

"he should be here.. but he is not at the shooting place?"

"mmm... may be stopped somewhere"

"Jung.. may be he still sleeping... try go n look , please.."

"ok... i ll call u back if he is here'

"thanks"

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i walk to his room... i knocked his door, is he in?... no one answer...

i opened the door..... i see him ... lying in the middle of the room.... with bloods all over...

what happened...i run to him.... his breathing... but didnt woke up when i called his name... he fainted....

"Jae.. jae...  what happened.... jae.... "

i called the ambulance... he  in the room... checked by doctors... yoochun just arrived...

"hyung!!!... how s Jae??"

"i dont know... doctors are checking him now"

"hyung... police said that his car found near your neighborhood... he crashed into a tree...  his phone is out of battery.. and there is no other houses at that area... they said he must have walked back by his own... eventhough the distance is not far... but for an injured man it is really far... they said by the blood trace found... he must be crawling home to u....."

"jae...." i m crying again.... why didnt i noticed his voice last night... its shaky... god... he had crawling back to me...

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"doctor how is jae?"

"mm he lost a lot of blood.. he sprained his feet... and we think  because of the crash... the bone in his arm is fractured.....  "

"thanks doc" 

"it weird but he keep calling KHJ... over and over again even when he is in that condition... mmm "

he must be in really great pain... walking home...... to fulfill his promise to me.......