Hyun Jin POV

what i m going to do? my life is in the mess... i dont understand what and why i ve done .... i really need to talk with someone , but who????  i can talk to my hyung, he will be disappointed by my action toward yoochun.....

"Hello....Hyun Jin"

"yes hyung.... why ur voice like this... are u crying?"

"more or less... but mmmm..... are u free tonight?"

"mmm i dont know yet, why?"

"mmm i want u to meet someone"

"him?"

"yea"

" i need to confirm it first.... can i call u back later"

"ok... call as soon as u can......"

if i m going to met my hyung, i have to cancel meeting yoochun dad this evening... so how? aish.........

"hello... y y yoochun"

"yes"

"where are u?"

"just finish my class, why?"

" i need to talk to u about something..."

"i ll be back... 5 more minutes see me at the room"

"ok....."

"so.. what do u want to talk abou?"

"mm y y yoochun.... i i i... "

"what!!?"

" i need to talk about something" why ... after that incident.... i felt i m really afraid of him?????

"what do u need to talk about"

"dont be angry please... can i postpone the meeting with your father this evening... "

"u dont want to meet my father?"

"its not like that.... i i... have to meet some one"

"who? ur boyfriend? girlfriend? tell me straight if u dont want to be responsible"

" no ... nothing like that.... can u trust me?"

"no!"

"i i i.... "

"what!!!!"

"i need to meet my hyung" i answered so fast...

"what did u say?"

"i need to meet my hyung"

"ur hyung? do u have one, dont lie to me... i live with u for a year and a half, i know u didnt have any sibling, u just want to make excuse"

"no.... i am really have one"

why he is so sensitive.....

Yoochun POV

He tried to run away..... he dont want to meet my dad, he didnt even sure what he want to do.... he just want to escape!!!!! argh!!!! i am really frustrated... why u like this, if u dont like me, why u me? i felt my heart shatered .....

i dont know why i am really mad at him.... because what he did to me? or because i dont believe that he is sincere... argh..... what should i do... if i force him like this.... he may really run away from me...... but this hurting me... i never in love before..... he want to go somewhere with someone... so he must felt that person is more important than me!!!!

"i dont know what to say.... but if it is really important, then go!!!!! but if u are not back here by midnight... i will make a conclussion that u just want to run away... and u just want to toy with me"

"i i i... never thought like that.... yoochun please.... i will be back by midnight.... ok... wait for me..... "

"ok"

even though i said ok, but my heart is really hurt... why did he do that.. why he want to lie to me.... he didnt have any  hyung... i know..... ah...... my chest.... i felt pain... my heart also hurt...

Hyun Jin POV

i had to go to see my hyung... his voice is different... i am afraid he is hurt.... i dont want to argue with yoochun... he never believe me anyway, who would believe if i said that i am KHJ s brother.....he will say that i make an excuse again

"hyung... u arrived already?"

"yes, where are u?"

"i m here", i knocked the van s window..

"where will we go?"

"to my house"

"he know i m coming?"

"yes.... "

we arrived at the house later...Jaejoong cook for dinner... mmm... i dont know how to face a celebrity, never had any experience  before... he opened the door for us... i bow my head to give respect to him... when i look at him... he is smiling at me... so i feel at ease.... i m really afraid that he look down at me...

"lets have dinner" he said.. ah... he is so gentle....  no wonder my hyung fall in love with him.....

we dine and talk... my hyung teasing me non stop... telling him aboout our chilhood stories... he like to embrase me... , that guy ask me to call him hyung... he is so warm... by a short time... i felt that i know him for a long time... his personality is similiar to someone i know... but who????  i cannot put the face...

my hyung excused himself and went to his room, he need to change and have a quick shower he said.. so i stayed downstairs just with Jae...

"mmm hyung.. "

"yes.."

"do really love him, my hyung?"

"yes... why?"

"can i asked u personak question..."

"just ask.. if i can i will answer... "

"how do u know that u like someone... i mean... IF i like someone, another man- how do i know?"

"mmmm.....u are having relation with other man didnt u?"

"mm yes... but my hyung didnt know it yet...'

"why dont u tell him... ?"

"hyung ... let say... u have a best friend.... and u really love him as a friend, then one day ... u think he has someone else and ignore u.... u get into a fight.. then u him... then u felt guilty and pain because u hurt him.. and u dont want to hurt him again... so u try ur best to follow what he want.. - what actually happened, and why?"

"mmmm i think.. when 2 man became friend.. sometime if they develop love, they didnt notice it.. because it grows on the relationship gradually..... from friendship to love ....

"if that person the other one because he think the other one have other person... then i can say actually he jelous and scared, he jelous because the person is ignoring him... and scare that he will loose that person..., then felt guilty because he make his partner go through pain and try not to hurt him.... mmmm may be he actually like that person, whom he hurt.. but he didnt know it, or may be he deny that he is gay"

"what can i do if that person didnt believe me... i mean if he think i just follow what he want because i felt guilty?"

"then u have to convince him, for a man ... to be is really pitiful... "

"mmm how  should i convince him......"

"so u some one?"

"mmm yea.... but i like him ... i m being jelous, but i dont want to say it...."

"ah... actually u like him but u dont want to admit, that is why u became mad, u have feeling for him"

"mmm i think so..."

the clock beeping... its midnight...

"yah!!!!! i just remember... i promise him to came back before midnight... hyung i have to go back, if not he will never forgive me!"

"i ll tell ur brother.. mmm just go, i ll the manager to send u back"

"ok... tell hyung im sorry, ireally need to go"

"ok...just go... "

i rushed back to the dorm... i tried to call, but he didnt pick the phone.. when i sms... the is no repply.... i really worried.... when i arribved at the room the light is off, the room is dark inside.. i switch on the light.... he is there... staring at me who is gasping for my breath... his face is pale... tears streaming down from his eyes... he is crying....

"Yoochun.. i am really sorry... i am late... i rushed here.. really... "

he just staring at me.... with tearful eyes... he pull his hand and put it on his ears... humming.... he dont want to hear what i said.. he look at me accusingly... hatefully... like i m lying to him..... i see that his trust on me is gone... argh!!!! how i want to handle this.... i really like him ido.. i dont want to loose him.... he start humming again... it is like he loose his sense....

"yoochun.. if u dont want to forgive me... if u dont trust me... i ll die!" i yell at him...

he just looking at me... with a look ... like saying... u just say it, u didnt mean it

i cannot think... my head really goes blank... then ... i see a small knife nearby me.... i take it...

"i ll do it.... u dont believe me right.. " i said

then i put my hand in front of him... i started to slice my arms.... my hand is trembling..... it s really hurt... i m bleeding...

he look worry...

"yoochun-ah.... i will slice myself until u said u forgive me..."

i slash my arm.. second time, third time... my blood is rushing out from my arm..

my eyes is full of tears... "yoochun... forgive me... i m sorry... im really am...... " i started to cut again... suddenly his hand is stopping me...

"Hyun Jin-ah... stop... i forgive u... i believe u... dont do that anymore ... i though... i hurt by u, when u go out... but i m hurting more seeing u hurt urself...stop already... i believe u..."

"yoochun... " im hugging him really close.... " i like u".....suddenly my world is dark.....

at the KHJ and Jae house

the phones ringing.... both pick up the phone

KHJ - "yes i am the guardian"

Jae- "where are u, why u are crying?"

KHJ - what - he fainted, why - did u say he sliced himself ????!!!!!

Jae -what hospital -why - he sliced himself???!!!!!

suddenly both of them looking at each other...." why we are repeating the same thing? "

KHJ- "Hyun Jin.. at the hospital, he sliced himself...fainted"

Jae -" yah! Yoochun what is the name of that boy?

Yoochun -"Hyun Jin"

Jae took KHJ hand.... "come"... he said

"where?"

"to ur brother... i think i know what happen, argh..... why should he do that"

"Jae i dont understand..."

"hyun jin ur brother is dating yoochun my brother"

"what!!!!!!? why he never tell me?"

"i think he didnt know it, i mean he didnt know he like yoochun"

"so why did he slash himself?"

"he want to take responsibility, but my brother think he just felt guilty...... ur brother is trying to show my brother that he is serious" jae explain

"why young people do stupid things!!!! "

"dad, mom why u are here...?"

"the university called, so we came here , Jae... what happened?"

"argh..... dad, mom.. this story will take time... it is a long one"

"just tell us... we need to know"

"hyun joong , come... u too has to hear this"

"so.... yoochun fall in love with hyun jin picture, find him and make friend with him, he thought hyun jin is his fiancee... he heard ur conversation dad... "

"this is why i dont like when people earsdropping....  they will never hear the full story, just part of it"

"where is yoochun?" mom asking

"with hyun jin, in the room"

"lets wait till morning, then we settle this all" dad said

MORNING - place hyun jin room

"so all here"

"yes"

"today we want to make announcements "

Jae "mom , dad.. u all so serious... "

yoochun "i dont care what u two want to say, i want to marry him"

hyun Jin "mom? dad? yoochun... are you..."

Jae "he is my brother"

yoochun "why KHJ is here?"

Hyun Jin "he is my brother"

"guys!!!!! announcement -  Yoochun -u are not Hyun jin fiancee

                                            - Jae and  KHJ are the one that engaged

yoochun " i dont care... i want this one, he is mine, he had to marry me!!!" he is hugging hyun jin

mom and dad - "if Jae and KHJ married than u can marry him"

yoochun - "why?????  i want to marry him now, i dont want to wait for those two, they didnt even have yet"

mom and dad- "what???!!!

Jae and KHJ-  "its not like th...."

mom and dad -" not u two - yoochun! that mean u already sleep with hyun jin"

yoochun - "Yea... n he must marry me, he must took responsibility"

hyun jin - "yoochun... u said... ur dad already know..."

mom and dad - "know what?"

yoochun - "nothing "...... (whispering to hyun jin ears)hyun jin.... if u dare to disobey or cheat me in the future, i ll tell them and they will kill u!!!

Jae - (whispering to KHJ ears) i pity ur brother... yoochun is really hard to handle

Hyun Jin - (whispering to KHJ) hyung.. i dont know how did i fall to his hand... he like a tiger

Mom - (whispering to dad) u should just not put them in one house, u should drug them and lock them in a room

dad- (whispering to Jae) why didnt u  bed him yet, just jump on him and put it in

because everyone is having their on thought and whispering to each other... at last all are burst into laughter.... feeling that each of the are really funny, by the time all of them want to go home...

yoochun - whispering -"hyun jin... tonight i want to bed u, i want to put mine into u

hyun jin -  whispering - "what!!!!.... if u do that it is like i m being tied, look my arms are suspended in the air already"

yoochun - whispering - "i dont care, u put yours into me that day... i want to do it also

hyun jin- whispering - "yah ...this is hospital

yoochun- whispering -"so i wear doctor uniform... is it ok?

hyun jin - whispering - "yah!!!"

yoochun - "dad!, mom! actually hyun jin he..."

hyun jin- whispering - "ok, ok ... just tell me what to do, i will obey u, huhuhuhu

mom and dad - "what is it yoochun?"

yoochun- "nothing.. heheheh"