Yoongi sat on one of the bench at his backyard garden. His hand grab a few of the scattered balloon and quickly blow the ballon up while he watched his friends being all jolly and delighted for the party that Jungkook had planned for Eunha's birthday. 

 

Some were arranging the place with the decorations and food and the others were too busy discussing on the best way to surprised  her. He didn't care much about it anyway. As long as everyone happy then he would be too. The only problem that rose is when he realised how the kids starting to disorganise the place. 

 

He agreed to lent his house for the occasion, but now as he imagined all the mess that may come with it, he started to regret his nonessential goodwill. And, when he saw Taehyung almost broke his favourite decoration in the garden, his heart dropped in an instant. He was going to scream at him before his eyes catch on those sweet smile that he has been crushing on for years, beautifully curved on Umji's lips. He immediately cancelled it, closed his eyes shut before he grab another balloon to blow.

 

"I'm sorry hyung!" Taehyung shouted in a distant, apologetically. 

 

He just nodded a little, ignoring a pair of eyes that he has been avoiding.  

 

"Everything is still under control I guess. Thank god Jungkook's reflex is so amazing, he managed to stabilise the pot. And, kids don't be too excited, okay? We don't want to destroy anything when we're here." The group were bursting out laugh when they realised Jin was imitating Sowon with his tone and eyes gesture.

 

"By the way, I think you can stop with the balloon now, Yoongi. We have enough already." He stated as he walked toward Yoongi, giving him a weird stare for his new addiction, blowing up balloons.

 

"I'm not blowing these up for the party, hyung." Yoongi said nonchalantly as he tied up the end of the inflated balloon. 

 

"This is for my room." 

"What do you mean?" Yoongi ended the conversation with a shrug and caused Jin to furrow his eyebrows deeper. 

 

"Oh gosh. What's up with your attitude, dude? Do you have PMS or something?" Jin hissed out of frustration. 

 

"I guess he just missed Sowon unnie?" Sinb who was busy decorating the table with Yuju tried to liven up the atmosphere but was protested by Hoseok. 

 

"Why do you brought her name up all of a sudden?" He was clearly trying to tease the girl but he would've absolutely been misunderstood in such situation. 

 

"Well because she's his best friend and because she's now in Japan. And, why do you have to interrupt me in everything?" Sinb refuted. Her eyes were fiercely glaring at him, but they obviously failed to make him gave in. 

 

"It's just doesn't make sense since Jin hyung is her boyfriend and why suddenly you want to associate Yoongi hyung with her when she has nothing to do with him?"

"Yes she do! She's the only one who could calm oppa down whenever he's not in a good mood."

"What? What does that even related to-" 

"Err guys..." Umji then voiced out, drawing all the attention toward her. 

 

Jimin then make a tsk sound as he folded his arm around his chest.

 

"Knock it off dude. And you too, Sinb. We're here to celebrate something remember? I don't understand why do you want to make a commotion on such a big day." He shook his head in disbelief a few time at the pair. Yuju who was watching in silent, nodded with the statement. 

 

"I'm sorry guys. I'm just not feeling well in the moment. Now if you excuse me, I have to go inside to clench my thirst." Yoongi then broke the silence as he got up from the chair and walked away from the place.

 

"Oh that's great. Would you please get me a glass of water too, hyung?" Jimin exclaimed quickly.

 

He turned around for a second before giving a single nod at Jimin.  As he walked into the house, Jimin then slightly pushed Umji, signalling she should followed him, but Jungkook hold her shoulder, stopping her with a smile. 

 

"I'll go." He muttered. 

 

***

 

Yoongi heaved a loud sigh as he rested both of his hand on the kitchen counter. A lot of things are going on his head right now and he doesn't even know what to do to stop them. When he realised Jungkook was walking toward him, probably trying to figure out what is up with him, he quickly straightened up himself and greeted him after clearing his throat.

 

"Hi."

"Yeah. I just come to get a glass of water too." Jungkook said as he went to the kitchen rack to grab a mug. 

 

"Oh." He simply replied. 

"The weather is pretty bad  nowadays, right? A lot of people tend to get sick in this kind of weather." 

 

Yoongi's eyebrow drew together, confused by the statement. 

 

"Err what?"

"I'm just saying... if you really are not well, then maybe you should get a check up at a clinic, hyung. Things could have gone worse if you didn't seek for early help." 

 

"What do you mean-"

"You look exhausted. Is it work?" Jin who had been eavesdropping them for a while, popped out with a big smile.

 

"Oh. Yeah... nothing to worry about, guys. I'm fine."

"You sure?"

 

"Yeah. I was just... you know I'm not that fond of  being outside with all these heat, right? I guess I'll just take a quick nap before the party. Is it okay for me to ditch all the work to you guys instead?"

"Of course, hyung. What are you talking about? I'm more than thankful you are willing to lend me the house for her birthday party. You've done more than enough." 

 

"Oh okay then. Don't forget to bring a glass of water for Jimin too on your way out, okay?" 

"Sure will." Jin's smile faded out as Yoongi walk toward his room. 'What could've happened between them really.' 

 

After finishing his water, Jungkook rinsed the mug and grab another to bring it out to Jimin. Jin who was standing at his side unknowingly blurted out his concern.

 

"Do you happened to know that Umji came back to Korea early this year?"

 

And, he immediately regretted he ever brought up the topic when Jungkook was so shocked with the question, he spilled out half of the water onto his shirt.

 

"W-what?" 

"Whoa! What's wrong with you, jk-ah?!" Jin shrieked.

 

"Thank god Sowon always remind me to put a spare shirt in my glove box." 

"I'm so sorry hyung..."

"No, it's okay. Just be careful next time okay?" Jin said, fanning his wet shirt as he went out to his car. 

 

Jungkook's eyes followed him until he had disappeared from his sight. The not so nice feeling from the accident night that have been temporarily vanish, starting to engulf him again, and this time he couldn't even hide his emotion anymore. If only instead of his wet shirt, Jin would pay more attention to him, then he could have witnessed all the vulnerabilities that visible on his face just now. 'Did hyung know what've happened already? But if he does, he probably had tried to talk about it with me, isn't it? Yup. I shouldn't be too worked up and create another misunderstanding. Let's just focus on the party.'

 

***

 

"Happy Birthday Eunha!" 10 of them together with Yerin who brought Eunha to the place chimed in unison. 

 

Eunha's lips curved the brightest smile as Jungkook come from afar with a cute balloon with a heart shape. Slowly he approached her, smiling sheepishly.

 

"Happy birthday my dear." He said as he hold dearly her hands. 

 

While all eyes were on the couple, Yoongi on the other hand, couldn't take his eyes of one girl. Those words that he would love to forget the most in the moment keep resounding in his head,

 

"Maybe... just maybe I feel that it's better for me to only look at him from afar like this." 

 

He heaved a long sigh as he is reminded by the thought again. 

 

***

 

The party went quite well. The queen of the day, Eunha couldn't put in words how she was grateful to have such a great circle of friends and a loving husband. But, in the same time there is something about him, about them that still does not feel right. As Jungkook was focusing on his driving, she took the opportunity to voice out her deep concern. 

 

"You don't have to do this for me really." She said with a small smile.

 

Jungkook took a glance to his side as he grab her hands. He rub it slowly before clutching their fingers together. And with a smile, he replied,

 

"It has always been your special day. You told me that you will put all the problems aside and just enjoy yourself to the fullest on a day like this. I guess it more or less like a ritual for us to get so hyped up whenever it's your birthday." 

 

To be honest, it is still quite surreal for Eunha but she decided to not push away his grip. She stared more as all the questions bounce in her head. 

 

"Jungkook... is there something you wanted to tell me?" She suddenly blurred out. Jungkook furrowed his eyebrows a bit and quickly answer,

 

"Huh? Not really. Why?" 

 

Eunha dazed out for a moment before curving wide smile.

 

"Nothing." She said with the most convincing tone. Jungkook gave a single nod, focusing on his driving before suddenly something come to his mind. 

 

"Listen. About the one that we talked the other day..." He slowly trying to put his thought into sentence. 

 

"Which one?"

"Oh you know... hmmm the living such life thing one."

 

Eunha blinked couple of times as she tried to process her thoughts.

 

"Okay... Why with it?"

"I know it might seemed like I'm suffering while having to work there, but other than that fastidious manager, I think I'm quite fine."

 

"Oh... Well-" Eunha was trying to say something but she was cut off Jungkook's startling statement.

 

"But, I don't think I could ever imagined a life without you." Eunha could feel her heart drop in an instant as she saw his genuine smile.

 

"Unless you wanted me to."  

 

"That's not what I meant!" She quickly refuted while waving both her hand in the air. He then glinted mischievously at her while continuing his driving. 

 

"I know. I was just saying." 

 

***

 

Sowon had just finished washing up as she throw her body to the hotel's comfy bed. Her modelling schedule for the day just finished and all she want to do for the moment was just to lay down when her phone rings. 

 

"Moshi moshi?" She lazily answered. 

 

"It's me." 

"Me who?"

"Look at the caller ID. Or don't tell me you already deleted my number?" 

 

Sowon peak on her phone's screen before smacking her forehead a few times. She let out a long sigh as she recognise the number and the voice well. 

 

"Is this Yoongi? I'm sorry. I accidentally flushed my phone into the toilet and had to go get a new phone. Now half of numbers in the phone book had gone missing."

"Lol what? You're such a clumsy Sowon." 

"Hey. It's my stylist's fault okay? She put it in my pocket without telling my anything and because the jacket was so tight, it falls onto the toilet when I was squatting."

"TMI. You don't have to be that detailed."

"You're the one who start it anyway. So what's up? Today is Eunha's birthday, right? I'm so sad I couldn't be there but I bet everything is just fine, huh?"

"I guess." He quietly muttered. 

 

"What do you mean by you guess? And, why do you sound so... sad?" 

"Is sad is the best word that you can choose to describe my voice at the moment?"

"Well I was going to say flatly pathetic but it would sound too harsh and I don't want to be the bad guy. But there must be something that you wanted to talk since you called, right? You rarely just call for hi or hello."

"Yeah. It would be weird if I do that when you already have a boyfriend."

"Eww. Are you jealous of me or what?"

"I'm not."

 

Sowon gasped as she heard the familiar cold tone that she had well informed it could become 100 times colder according to the weight of the situation. 

 

"You sounded serious. I guess something really did happened, huh?" She sat herself on the bed, started to dig the issue further. 

 

"Kind of."

"It's okay. You can tell me about it." She tried to said it with the most reassure way ever. Sowon wait for awhile before she heard sigh from the end of call as Yoongi wretchedly answered,

 

"I had a fight with Umji." 

 

She widened her eyes in disbelief as this is the first time she had ever heard of something as bizarre as this. 

 

"Well, it's quite funny because I don't even know why I did it." 

"Why? What happened?"

"I don't know if you already know about this but I guess you do since you're the only one who she would come to whenever she had a problem." 

"There's also Eunha but yeah..."

"You're a mother figure to her, right?" 

"Yeah... I guess." 

"She told me about it."

"Go on."

"About her feelings for Jungkook."

 

There's a long pause as Sowon realised the whole picture. 

 

"Gosh Yoongi..."

"Why didn't you tell me about it?"

"I was going to but-" Sowon tried to explain but she was cut off hastily by Yoongi.

 

"I felt so ashamed of myself. I mean I know the possibility for her to have a same feeling as me would only exist in my dream but I didn't know that she had a crush on him for god knows when." 

 

Sowon stay quiet to give him time to let out his feelings.

 

"I know there's nothing to hope for in the first place but I still thought I should just try my luck and... I guess I just make a fool of myself." He heaved another sigh before was surprised by Sowon's tsk sound.

 

"You are indeed a fool. You're like the most foolish of all the fools combined."

"What? Gosh I'm serious Sowon-"

"Me too! How could you say that when you did almost nothing to court her properly? Have you confessed? Have she rejected you? No, right?" Suddenly Sowon felt a surge of emotion overtook her with her friend's frustrating attitude. She take a deep breath before continued,

 

"So what you're babbling about right now is just a piece of the lost self esteem that you never had. You shouldn't say that if you don't even try to do something about it. Well, yes she likes someone else. But is that really going to be a reason for you to stop your own feeling for her?" 

"Well..."

"Man up, Yoongi! At least do something about it. Stop hiding behind all those act of kindness you showered her. Come up front and show her who you really are. And if she still rejected you, you are allowed to be a crybaby by then. Besides, she haven't said anything between you guys' relationship didn't her? So what are you so afraid about?" 

 

Yoongi was definitely stunned by the truth in the sentence. Sowon is right, he never did anything yet, how could he back off now. Nonetheless, it still feels way too late for him to even do something now that she had confessed her real feelings, that she actually had been crushing his own best friend. 

 

"It's not that easy, Sowon..."

"Who said it is? There were never an easy fight when it comes to love. You just have to try... and don't easily give up. That's all."

 

***

 

Umji wrapped herself with the big warm coat as she stands at the side of her neighbourhood park. The weather has become a bit chilly considering winter is coming soon and a simple text to dress warmly from Yoongi somehow ease her heart a bit even when she still could not stop worrying over his sudden remoteness.

 

"Hey." She was deep in thought when a voice greeted her from the side.

 

"Oh. Hi oppa." She smiled warmly. 

 

***

 

"Hmm... so?" Yoongi broke the silence as he realised all Umji ever done since the last 20 minutes they were in the coffee shop was stirring her latte. She nervously look at him back, blinking rapidly. 

 

"Yeah?" 

"You said you have something to say." This time Yoongi lowered down his gaze as he blushed with her cute respond.

 

"Oh... That." She bit her lips nervously. 

"Continue." Yoongi sip his coffee, hoping she wouldn't realise the redness of his cheeks. Umji cleared as she gather the courage.

 

"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable with my confession. It's nothing really. I know it." Yoongi could feel his heart drop in an instant hearing those words from . He knows well that she wanted to discuss about it. But, somehow deep down he is still hoping that it was all just a nightmare, that it never happened in the first place.

 

"But, I can't help it as well. She made a pause, waiting for him to interrupt. 

 

"Even though it was just a childish one sided love." 

"No, Umji." He calmly reassured her.

 

"You don't have to be sorry for loving someone. It was a genuine feeling. I mean those thing that you felt for him." He took another sip. His eyes wandered through the shop's window, avoiding her eyes that are fixed on him now.

 

"It's just... he's already married. And, you definitely deserved someone better." He put his mug down, peeking on her respond. He was stunned and confused as he saw a slight smile curve on her face. It was a mix of pain and... relief?

 

"To be truth, I'm not sure if it was love or not. There's a lot going on in my life and I guess I just shifted all the burden of worrying about those thing into obsessing over him instead." Her smile grew wider as she caught his attention. 

 

"And, it felt quite unfair for not being able to show my real feeling toward him. Though I can't blame anyone for it. I was too scared it will ruined my friendship with him, with Eunha unnie... I don't want to lose them both. Call me greedy for wanting to have them both in my life, but I really would do anything to have them with me forever." Yoongi was unsure of what he should say for the moment. His eyes glazed on her as Umji's voice trembled, starting to trail off into a whisper.

 

"That being said, I also can't help not to think... if only I got to confess, would he ever understand my feeling?"