Five years later…

Two little kids running chasing each other with big smile plastered on their face. They were not bothered by the burning sun nor did the sand cover their feet. The bigger kid purposely fell down when her play mate, a boy about two years younger caught her leg. Their loud giggles can be heard miles away attracting other visitors and tourists with their cuteness. Some flashes can be seen as few peoples wanted to capture the sweetness of the two kids they thought were siblings.

”Haneul! Doyoon! Your Mom and Dad are calling for lunch! Come here, hurry!” A bit far from the little kids, a women aged about in middle 50s wore shades and light brown beach hat was calling them. The kids immediately ran to their grandmother while waving to several people along the way.

“I told you to not play too far from us. Are not you feel hot? Look at these sweats.” The mother wiped the running sweats on the forehead and temple while the little boy acted nonchalantly drinking his favourite juice given by his grandmother just now.

“Let the kid enjoy their childhood, Byunghun. Don’t be too strict with them. After all the kids are not playing too far still under our supervision.” Siwon readjusted his shades on his nose bridge. He just came from hotel room so the ray a bit too much for him.

The big family of Kim went for short vacation in Busan when summer just started last week. The temperature was quite hot but for people summer time meant beach or pool. Siwon and Hyunah preferred to stay under shade not much going out unlike their sons and grandchildren.

“But Daddy it’s very hot may be dangerous for them. What is they fall sick?” Byunghun turned to his mother in law hoping that the lady will sided him. “Woohyun hyung also worry on Haneul.”

The said man quickly shot his head the moment his name was called. He was silently enjoying his ice cream beside his husband did not really participate in the conversation but suddenly his name was mentioned. Speaking about Haneul, Woohyun actually supervised his daughter from his seat as he can see very clear what his daughter and nephew were doing. Furthermore, Haneul already five years old, she can differentiate between the good and bad but still 100% under him and Sunggyu supervision.

“Byunghun Mommy don’t worry we are not playing far from you guys. Haneul will take care of Doyoon baby the best. You can always count on this big girl.” Haneul proudly patted her chest after she finished talking. She really adores Doyoon as her little brother as currently she was still a single child. Although she received endless and overflowing love from both of his parents but deep inside her heart she would like to have at least a sibling.

“That is Daddy’s Princess. Remember, you must take care of Doyoon because he is still a baby. Do not play too hard with him or else Myungsoo Daddy and Byunghun Mommy stop you from playing with Doyoon.” Sunggyu pulled her daughter onto his lap and kissed her chubby cheeks.

“Daddy, can I have a baby brother like baby Doyoon?”

Right after the innocent question left Haneul mouth, all of them almost immediately sealed their mouth especially other than the girl parents. Everyone was fidgeting in their respective seat, sending each other signal because they knew every time this topic came out, the result will always not be like they wish for. Responding to the question, Woohyun quickly cleared his throat earning a few glances from the rest. He saw Sunggyu looks so tense in his seat.

“Haneul, you are still baby to Mama and Daddy. Will forever be our baby.” Woohyun caressed the little girl cheeks. Those chubby cheeks literally inherited from him, no doubt.

“But Mama all my friends said it is good to have sibling. They are very excited when our school has ended because they cannot wait to get home and play with their siblings. Haneul is sad because I have no playmate.”

Hyunah wanted to say something but looking at her son face, she opted for silence. There was only reason why until now even after their first born already 5 years old, the couple were not trying for second child. It was not because they wanted only one baby, there was another reason why only Haneul until now. The main concern was Kim Sunggyu. At first Hyunah thought maybe his son was not ready for the second child as he wanted to spend as much as possible time with Hanuel but she was wronged.

All these while Sunggyu refused to have second child because he was still traumatised by the past. He was scared to have another baby as he was afraid the same thing may happen again to his family. The separation only brings Sunggyu sorrow and afraid. Imagine your pregnant wife just counting days to give birth was kidnapped and to add more, he gave birth to your baby alone without assisted by specialist. What if there was complication? What will happen if the worst scenario occurs? It was a total nightmare to Sunggyu. At first he tried to ignore it and tried for second baby but the more he eager trying, the more it haunting.

Woohyun noticed the changes, how Sunggyu acted differently when they about to have ual activity. Not only once or twice but every single time and Woohyun had enough when Sunggyu started to use . What was the point? They were married. Sure it was a big issue between them at first but after a long heart to heart discussion then Woohyun finally understand what fears his husband the most. He did not fully blame him though because that catastrophic memory sure left trauma to whoever experienced.

“Excuse me first. I need some rest until dinner.” And Sunggyu left his chair abruptly, leaving the rest staring at him especially Haneul because just now she was relaxing on his lap.

“I’ll get him don’t worry much. Haneul, can you stay with them for a while. Listen to Byunghun Mommy well okay or you cannot play with baby Doyoon anymore. Don’t give hard time to Granny and Granddaddy okay.”

Haneul nodded. Her eyes looked very sad. “Is Daddy angry?”

“No my dear. Daddy is tired Mama will look for him first. Stay with Granny and Granddaddy okay.”

---

Just as expected, Sunggyu did not sleep but the man was standing on the balcony facing the open ocean. Looking from the back view, Woohyun can already know his husband was in a very deep thought. Carefully Woohyun walked closer and wrapped his arms around the waist. The sudden touch brought Sunggyu back to reality, he tilted his head to see Woohyun beside him leaning against his shoulder.

“Where is Haneul?” Sunggyu asked in a very soft tone. His mind cleared a bit after calming himself here. Specific ocean scent gave him therapy it was a good choice to have a vacation here after working hard.

“Mommy and Daddy are taking care her. You have not eaten yet aren’t you hungry? Do you want me to call room service?” Woohyun tried to distract his husband. Sunggyu only had few sandwiches and a glass of apple juice for breakfast.

Sunggyu just shrugged his shoulder did not immediately answer Woohyun’s question. His eyes still fixed at the ocean view in front, not really gave much attention to Woohyun whom was clinging to his left arm. Sunggyu was still thinking about his daughter simple request just now. To other people it may bring joy and excitement but to him it was a nightmare. A total nightmare. If people asked him whether he wanted to have more kids, Sunggyu will strictly say no, Haneul is enough.

He was still traumatized by the bad memory which later forced him to make this decision. It was hard but this might be the best although Sunggyu had some fights with Woohyun about this matter. Woohyun was fumed when Sunggyu firmly did not want to have second baby. They did not talk for a week about this and always fight if the same subject was discussed. Not until Woohyun persuaded and talked to Sunggyu then later he understood his husband trauma.

It was hard at first for Sunggyu and also Woohyun. When people asked them when to give Haneul little sister or brother, Woohyun could only smile. It gave him pressure unintentionally because people put the blames on him without knowing the truth behind. At one point Woohyun just ignore whatever people saying because they did not know what actually faced by them. Sunggyu trauma was not something can be taken lightly.

Few moments later, finally Sunggyu diverted his attention to Woohyun. The sun was getting brighter burning their skin. “Let’s get inside. I want to call room service because I’m hungry. Do you want anything?”

“Make it same as yours. I don’t know what to eat.”

Sunggyu just reply with a short hummed, right away went to night stand to call the room service. Two set of grilled chicken chop and lemonades arrived not long after that. Woohyun prepared the table while waiting for his husband doing his business in the bathroom. The couple then ate in silence just the sound clinking cutlery can be heard.

“Please do not take serious about Haneul’s request. She is just a little kid you know kids can be very clueless right. She does not know the real story.”

“I am not angry at her. Why would I?” Sunggyu paused his feed and glanced at Woohyun with a deep frown.

Woohyun was taken back at first. “Why you suddenly left to our room. Haneul was thinking you are angry at her. She is sad.” Automatically his daughter pouty face came across his mind. Haneul was too young to understand her parents concern.

“Woo, do you still want another kid?” Then, Sunggyu looked directly into Woohyun’s eyes deliberately caused the younger male to put down his fork and knife.

“If you asked my honest answer, I would say yes I still want a second baby if possible more than three.”

A brief imagination of them playing with their kids in the yard flashed before Woohyun’s eyes. Since he was young he always wants to have a big family at least with three or four kids but for now it seems hard to achieve that.

And everyone can see those innocence pairs was reflecting nothing only pure joy and hope. Was he self-centric? Sunggyu could not come out with any answer. He was always wants to make Woohyun the happiest person in his life but at the same he was hurting that beautiful soul. Should he?

“I am not sure about this but maybe I should try to leave that bad memory behind? I am not promising you anything but we can try for the second one.” Sunggyu directly looked into Woohyun’s.

“You should not push yourself much if you are not ready. Please not to be burdened with my answer, Sunggyu.”

“No, this time I am determined to get over this. This is for the sake of our happiness. Seeing both of my love pressured with my self-centred action is hurting me too much.”

Next after that, tears of joy coming out from Woohyun as he did not expect the day he hopes his husband will agree to has a second child was coming today. He was too happy that he kissed Sunggyu until his husband ran out breath. As they parted, Sunggyu chuckled, he was shocked to see Woohyun reaction.

“Maybe we can start now?” Without waiting a reply, Sunggyu quickly pulled Woohyun towards their bed. They forgot a moment that Haneul was still at the beach with their parents.

---

A year later...

“Mama, is this my baby brother?” Haneul’s eyes were shining the moment her father put her on the bed to get a closer look at her new born baby brother. “He is so small.”

“Five years ago you are also like this. All babies are small, darling.” Sunggyu explained to his daughter. That kid was still mesmerized with her brother. When she knew Woohyun was going to give birth soon, she was the most excited person.

The baby held by Woohyun suddenly yawned having the little girl gasped due to his cuteness. Carefully, Woohyun drawn the baby closer to Haneul and askd her to caress him. At first she was hesitated because she was afraid if she might hurt the fragile baby but after Sunggyu told that was fine, Haneul reached out her hand to touch him for the first time.

“He is warm.” Both Sunggyu and Woohyun chuckled.

“Of course he is warm. He just coming out from Mama. Besides, he needs warmth or he can fall sick if too cold.” The girl was only nodding and continue caressing the baby, sometimes cooed when the baby yawned or moving.

“What should we name him?” The eldest figure in the room asked the parents. It happens by chance Siwon was having coffee with his friends near to the hospital when he received a call from his son saying that Woohyun was about to give birth.

Woohyun shifted back to his daughter. “Do you have idea what we should name your baby brother?”

Haneul was beaming, she was looking at Sunggyu and Woohyun. She was excited to have the honour to name her brother. The moment Woohyun announced his pregnancy few months before, Haneul has been preparing some name to give her unborn sibling. To make it safe, she was preparing name for both gender as her parents were keeping the gender secret from her.

It was Sunggyu revealed to Woohyun that Haneul is preparing a list name for their unborn baby. He was going to wish her goodnight and accidently found a piece of paper with a list of name held by her. Sunggyu did not mean to interfere his daughter privacy but Haneul fell asleep at her study desk and he happen to know when he lifted her to put to sleep properly.

“Can we name him Kim Hyunki?” Haneul looked up to Woohyun, waiting for a reply.

“Whatever you suggest as long as the name brings good meaning to him Mama is fine. Try Haneul call him with that name.”

“Hyunki~”

The baby responded with soft gurgle sound made the whole room smile at the sibling cute interaction. It can be seen Haneul will love her baby brother and spoil him whatever she could. Sunggyu was relieved for the nine months of pregnancy, they managed to end with no bad experience. Woohyun was also fine, experienced no complication only at the early stage his nausea was a bit hard compared to the previous pregnancy.

No more scary nightmares after seeing this beautiful picture of happy family. Sunggyu could only hope he can grow his family without any disturbance. His eyes accidently met Woohyun, they both shared a meaningful smile contain a lot of emotion only them understand. Sunggyu secretly held his wife hand and kissed his crown.

“Thank you for giving me a beautiful family. Will you be with me until the end?” His voice almost whispering but still can be heard by Woohyun.

“Where ever you go I will always by your side. As long I still in your heart, I will stay with you until death do us apart.”

“I love you.” / “I love you too.”

I would like to send my gratitude to every single person who read and give endless support to me. I start writing this story when I was a first year student and finally get to finish this after almost 3 years working. I am so sorry to make everyone waiting for an update. I hope I give a proper ending to this story and satisfy ever each of you.

Thank you so much.