“We don’t know what we would do without you, maknae-ahhhh!” Jiyong said as he moves forward and pulls his maknae into a tight hug, while Taeyang and Daesung are watching the two of them with relieved expression.

 

They shared the same gratitude feelings now; after they came to know that Seungri already spoke to their eldest hyung about the thing that they really wish for their hyung. The three of them are currently having conversation in Seungri’s room while Da Ra and Yoona already went to Seunghyun’s ward earlier. The brothers had been meaning to discuss this matter together without Seunghyun and the three hyungs have been brainstorming on how to coax their hyung to undergone that transplant surgery but it turns to dead end when they came to remember what Seunghyun has said to them last time. No transplant.

 

It is such a great relieve for the three of them when Seungri already told them that he already delivered the matter to Seunghyun earlier that morning. The hardest part, is done.

 

“His response???” Daesung asked.

 

Seungri moves to sit on a bit on the edge of his table while folding his arms to his chest. That frown expression on his face clearly showing the real feedback from their hyung. Jiyong, Taeyang and Daesung get it right away.

 

“He said no…” Daesung said it anyway.

 

Seungri shakes his head. “In fact, he actually didn’t say anything…” he continued.

 

Jiyong pats Seungri’s right shoulder while nodding his head understandingly. “At least he knows where we are standing right now… So, thank you maknae… You did good…” Jiyong said.

 

Taeyang turns around and move to the couch in the room and finally taking a sit on it while his eyes are now on his dongsaengs. “I don’t know what we should do now when he has making it clear to us before by saying no transplant since day one…” Taeyang said in disappointment.

 

“It’s okay… By not saying anything, maybe he might actually reconsider it…” Daesung tries to shine some light to the darkness.

 

“We have to see his progress first and for now, there’s still a waiting list hyung… Don’t forget…” Seungri said as reminding his hyungs about another problem for them.

 

“Ahh… Waiting list….” Taeyang said to himself.

 

“I already contacted few hospitals from overseas… I’m waiting for their response for now…” Jiyong said.

 

“Are we being selfish?” Daesung suddenly opens his mouth and his words definitely like a dagger.

 

Everyone stares at him in response. “No… Listen… I’m all for transplant okay… That’s the best way to save Seunghyun hyung, in fact it’s the only way out… But guys… Think… This is Eun Hye’s heart that we are talking about… Seunghyun hyung would crush you know… It’s like we are taking something precious from him in order to give him the new one… Just because we want him to stay with us longer… We are desperate for him to be with us. That’s the thing… We want him here… No matter what... But, actually, think again… We actually want him to live for us or…. For his own happiness??? Because, as far as I know, he wants her…” Daesung said it softly.

 

Seungri gets up from his position and moves to his own chair, ignoring his Daesung hyung. “So you want to let him die? Just like that?” Seungri said with anger.

 

Taeyang keeps his mouth shut at this and Jiyong can’t say anything either.

 

Daesung moves to the chair located in front of Seungri’s table. He knows his dongsaeng is mad at him now for saying those things.

 

“I know I’m not supposed to think it that way when all of us want him to be saved… But Seungri… Hey, look at me…” Daesung is calling out Seungri who is currently looking away, ignoring his hyung. “Seungri-ahh… No one wants to die… Mainly when they have a happy family like us… It’s not that Seunghyun hyung go to sleep one night and the next day he decided to die and it’s better for him to leave us…” Daesung’s words finally managed to make the youngest to turn and looking at him. Daesung takes a deep breath before he opens his mouth once again. “We are the one that he has always wanted Seungri… Us… Seunghyun hyung lives each of his days for us, with us… He looks like he is so ready to leave right? He said those silly things like he said to us 10 years ago… He’s doing it again, right? Do you think he wants to do it? Do you think he likes what he did or said? Hey… It’s because he doesn’t know when he’s going to die, so he said things like that Seungri… Because, this is beyond his control… We can give him 1000 hearts for him, to save him… But what if God wrote something different for us? If you are trying to be mad because he chose not to do any transplant because he doesn’t want to let Eun Hye’s heart go, that would be childish, Seungri-ahh… Because you know why? Because he actually chose us first, in everything… If you said Seunghyun hyung wants to die because he wants to be with Eun Hye that bad, he actually can do that 10 years ago…” Daesung stops for a while to wait for Seungri’s response but his maknae is locking his mouth. “Seunghyun hyung can just go kill himself right after that surgery, Seungri! If Eun Hye is everything that he wants…”

 

That fact hits Seungri, Jiyong and Taeyang real hard. Daesung gets up from the chair slowly while his eyes are still on Seungri.

 

“Do you understand his feelings, Seungri?” Daesung asked. “Regardless the fact that Eun Hye actually died saving you, Seunghyun hyung’s precious maknae and the fact that she also ended up saving Seunghyun hyung… Do you understand his feelings? He’s with us Seungri… In these 10 years, he’s there… And even now, he’s still here… He chose us…” Daesung said softly.

 

Daesung walks away from the chair, intent to leave the room, for the other three to think deeply about the matter in hands. However, he stops at the door and turns around, facing his brothers.

 

“Don’t get me wrong… I want this transplant thing for him too… Of course… I love Seunghyun hyung… But as much as I think about it… This is selfish, guys…” Daesung said.

 

“And never once in his entire life, Seunghyun hyung has been selfish to us…”

 

“Oppa!” Yoona is almost shouting as soon as she entered the room, when she looks her brother in law is already trying to get up from the bed by himself and he even pull of the nasal tube from his nose.

 

“Oppa, what are you doing???” Da Ra said as soon as she entered after Yoona. The both women walk faster to Seunghyun who just letting out his silly grins at his sisters in law’s respond.

 

“I’m bored…” Seunghyun answered as he sits back on his bed and let the two women eyeing him from head to toe.

 

“You just collapsed yesterday, and today you expect you can go out for a walk??? Don’t even dream…” Yoona warns him as she puts her bag and little stuffs from home on the table near the couches; meanwhile Da Ra is taking a sit on the bed as well, beside Seunghyun without taking away her eyes from him.

 

“You even pull off that tube!? Put it back...” Da Ra scolded him as she gets up again and taking the tube from the pillow and brings it to Seunghyun’s nose. Seunghyun just laughs and push away the tube from him.

 

“You are not forcing that thing on me, Da Ra…” Seunghyun warns a bit but still with a smile on his face. These two women will literally tie him on the bed and making him listen to them like always. One of the reason why he doesn’t feel the need of having a wife of his own when he already surrounded by his dongsaeng’s wives.

 

“Oppa! Don’t be stubborn… Wear it back!” Yoona scolded.

 

Seunghyun shakes his head playfully as he jokingly swings his legs, watching the two witches staring at him in anger.

 

“I’ll call the doctor, if you are so stubborn…” Yoona threatened.

 

“Call them all you want…” Seunghyun replied with a smirk.

 

Da Ra looks like she is giving up when she just ended up looking at her brother in law in defeat. She throws away that tube back on the pillow. “Have you eaten your breakfast?” she changed the topic.

 

Yoona is shaking her head as she realized Da Ra just gave up forcing Seunghyun with the tube so she just sit on the bed next to Seunghyun, while fixing Seunghyun’s hospital shirt which is crumpled a bit at the back side.

 

Seunghyun just nodded his head at Da Ra’s answer.

 

“Where are the kids? ” Seunghyun asked.

 

“With their nanny and Hyo Rin… She needs to stay with the kids… But Taeyang will bring her here later…” Da Ra answered as she pulls the visitor’s chair near the bed.

 

“Does Seunghoon know that I’m here?” Seunghyun asked, as he suddenly remembers about his nephew. Da Ra shakes her head.

 

“I told him that you are just gone for outstation…” Da Ra answered.

 

“Good… Don’t tell him…” Seunghyun reminded. “Appa?” he asked.

 

“He went out earlier… He said he is meeting his friends and then he will come here…” Yoona answered voluntarily.

 

Seunghyun turns to his right, looking at Yoona who is swinging her legs too, like him while just staring on the floor.

 

“Yoon…” Seunghyun calls out.

 

“Hmmm…” Yoona answered with her eyes are still on the floor.

 

“I’m sorry….”

 

Yoona expected this, so she lifts up her head and turns to look at her brother in law. Seunghyun’s face is clearly showing guilt and Yoona knows why.

 

“You don’t like me, oppa?” Yoona asked right away.

 

Seunghyun is taken aback by that sudden assumption but he knows why Yoona is thinking that way.

 

“Yoon…”

 

“I’m sorry if at times; it looks like that I overreacted at certain things or even nagging at you or even scolding you… I won’t anymore, oppa… I promise, I won’t mad at you… It just…” Yoona couldn’t finish when Seunghyun suddenly cuts her.

 

“No… It’s my fault for not telling you… It’s wrong… I know… And it won’t happen again… I promise… So don’t stop nagging at me… Oppa would be better next time… Don’t stop caring about me…” Seunghyun said.

 

Yoona smiles at those words, and her disappointment melts away.

 

“It’s okay Oppa… I would do better next time too…” Yoona said.

 

“Woah, soap opera… Don’t forget, that you are actually keeping it away from all of us too… Me and Hyo Rin…” Da Ra said teasingly to the two of them.

 

“But looking at you now, I bet Jiyong and Taeyang already gave you a heads up, right?” Seunghyun said and he just laughs it off.

 

“I bring you books, if you are bored…” Yoona said it softly and with a sweet smile this time. “There are all in that paper bag…” she said while pointing at the paper bag on the table.

 

Seunghyun nods his head with gratefulness. “Thank you…”

 

“I can bring you movies next time, if you want…” Da Ra offered.

 

“It’s okay… What are you trying to do? Keeping me here much longer?” Seunghyun jokingly said.

 

“No, oppa…” Da Ra replied with a frown.

 

“I’m kidding Da Ra…” Seunghyun replied. “Why taking it too serious…”

 

Everyone just turn quiet for a moment, suddenly don’t know what to say and Seunghyun just smiles to himself, while still swinging his legs at the side of the bed.

 

“You don’t want to lean on the bed at least?” Yoona asked.

 

Seunghyun shakes his head with his eyes are still on the floor.

 

A few seconds later, someone opens the door slowly and all heads are looking at the same direction. Relieved smiles appear on Yoona and Da Ra’s face when they see Jong Suk’s figure entering the room.

 

“Just the two of you?” Jong Suk asked directly as he walks closer to them, carrying his stethoscope with him leisurely.

 

Yoona straights away come down from the bed and go standing beside Da Ra. “They will come in later… They might be with Seungri…” Yoona said informed.

 

The mention of Seungri’s name, is making Seunghyun’s smile fading a little.

 

“I come to checking up on you Hyun-ah…” Jong Suk said as he moves closer to Seunghyun on the bed but he wrinkles immediately when he noticed something. “You pulled off the nasal tube??”

 

Seunghyun let out a small laughs as he takes the tube on the pillow and showing it to Jong Suk with a smirk.

 

“You really do have the way to get into my nerves, aren’t you Seunghyun!?” Jong Suk scolds.

 

“I’m fine…” Seunghyun replied lazily.

 

“Well, Da Ra, Yoona, could you please leave us for a moment?” Jong Suk asked politely with a comforting smile.

 

Da Ra nods her head immediately and gets up from the chair while Yoona just takes her handbag with her.

 

“We will outside, oppa…” Da Ra said to Seunghyun.

 

Seunghyun just nods his head and smiles. Da Ra and Yoona then walk together heading to the door and finally leave the two men in the room alone. Jong Suk moves closer to Seunghyun with the stethoscope in hand, ready to have a quick check up on his best friend.

 

“How do you feel today? Better?” Jong Suk asked as he stands in front of Seunghyun and put the circle part of the stethoscope on Seunghyun’s chest.

 

“Never better…” Seunghyun replies while taking a deep breath for Jong Suk.

 

“Well, you sound pissed…” Jong Suk replied.

 

No words coming out from Seunghyun afterwards, but Jong Suk just continues checking on Seunghyun. He looks at Seunghyun’s pale face which has no smile on it now and Jong Suk gets it. Seunghyun is not in a good mood.

 

“What’s wrong? Tell me...” Jong Suk said as he pulls away his stethoscope from his ears and moves pulling the chair that before this occupied by Da Ra. He sits on it and looks at Seunghyun with concern. “What is it this time?” Jong Suk asked.

 

Seunghyun just looks at the floor, ignoring his best friend’s stares and Jong Suk just sits on the chair while once in a while looking at the heart monitor, observing Seunghyun’s heart rate.

 

“Seunghyun, you know that you can tell me everything… Keeping it to your self won’t help… Why? Your fake smile won’t work on me, you know… What’s the matter?” Jong Suk said.

 

“Seungri talked to me this morning…” Seunghyun said slowly while his eyes are still on the floor.

 

“About the transplant thing?” Jong Suk asked.

 

Seunghyun just takes a deep breath and let out a heavy sigh this time.

 

“You already talked to them about this before right?” Jong Suk asked.

 

“Yes…”

 

“So, he changed his mind and decided that you should listen to them this time…” Jong Suk guessed.

 

Seunghyun didn’t reply for a moment but just taking a few seconds, thinking.

 

“Jong Suk-ah…” Seunghyun opens his mouth and this time he looks at his best friend.

 

Jong Suk waits for his best friend to continue by keeping his mouth shut.

 

“It’s not that I wanted to die that bad…” Seunghyun said softly. “Leaving them behind is the last thing I have in mind…” Seunghyun stops for a moment before he continues again. “Am I making things hard for them?”

 

Jong Suk doesn’t have any answer to that question and he believes that Seunghyun has a lot more in mind and more things to say.

 

“It’s never my intention to make things hard for them and this is not a suicide attempt. Refusing transplant… It’s not that I refuse for transplant because I want to die… You know this very well, Jong Suk-ahhh…”

 

Jong Suk fixed his position on the chair and straightening himself properly.

 

“You want me to talk to them?” Jong Suk asked.

 

Seunghyun have no words to say this time. What can Jong Suk do for him and what this man can say to his dongsaengs.

 

“Jong Suk, I just…”

 

“I understand….” Jong Suk cuts Seunghyun’s words this time. “I’m fully understood what you meant… And I respect your decision this time… I won’t force you and I won’t do anything without consulting with you first. You told me what you want before so I’ll do as what you said… My duty is to you and not to them… But if you want me to talk to them about this, I will… So, for now, just stay calm and rest… Don’t bother thinking about what they want and what they need… This time… Let’s do as what you want, Seunghyun…” Jong Suk as he gets up from the chair and standing in front of Seunghyun.

 

Seunghyun let out a bitter smile to his best friend this time.

“Everyone’s wariness starting to be heavy things for me…” Seunghyun said softly.

 

“Because they love you… And it’s not easy to be so acceptance when it comes to the person we love… It would take time and it would take patience… You know your dongsaengs so well, Seunghyun and you know how much they care for you… This happened when they really love you and it’s not a wrong thing…” Jong Suk said.

 

“I can understand them… But the question is, can they understand me? They think I’m giving up, Jong Suk-ahh…”

 

Jong Suk let out a sigh at Seunghyun’s words and he knows right away that Seunghyun is actually disappointed with his dongsaengs.

 

“What if even after the transplant, I would still die?” Seunghyun asked. “They lost me… And I lost her heart…”

 

Jong Suk has no words to say in return.

 

“You said about acceptance just now… They couldn’t accept the fact that I’m dying… They couldn’t accept the fact that I’m sick… But deep in their hearts, they are hoping for me to accept that Eun Hye is gone and I have to move on?” Seunghyun said what is in his heart.

 

“Seunghyun-ahh…”

 

“Jong Suk… It has been 10 years… And I can still hear Eun Hye is laughing across the room… I can still hear her voice calling out my name… I can still see her everywhere Jong Suk-ahh… Like she always here… Running to me every time we met… Waiting for me with a smile... Those things… Her smiles, her hair, her touch, everything! And I’ve to live with that since 10 years ago…” Seunghyun said with his eyes looking directly at Jong Suk who is standing in front of him. “I might not be talking about her, I might never mention about her even once… But that doesn’t mean, she’s not in my mind…” he continued softly with his sad eyes.

 

 

“Is everything okay?” Seohyun asked as soon as she sits on the couch inside Seungri’s office. Seohyun has planned to come to visit Seunghyun so she decided to meet Seungri first. Her presence always being welcome with a smile from Seungri but just now, even herself can feel the coldness from the young man who obviously making himself look busy from across the messy table.

 

“I bet you are so busy till you can’t even answer my short question…” Seohyun said when her previous question was left hanging without answer.

 

A heavy sighs coming from Seungri when he just carelessly put down his pen and leans on his chair, while finally moves his eyes to his girlfriend who looks at him with concern from the couch.

 

“Bad day?” she asked again, but softer this time as she noticed the tired look on Seungri’s face.

 

Seungri shakes his head in return but still refuse to utter a word.

 

“Seunghyun oppa?” Seohyun guessed again.

 

Seungri doesn’t say anything but he looks away at the mention of the name, which makes Seohyun understand right away. That’s the cause of this frowning. Seohyun gets up from the couch and walks toward Seungri who still looking away. Seohyun lands a bit at the table and with folding arms, she looks down at his boyfriend.

 

“What’s the matter? Tell me…” she said.

 

Seungri still keeps his mouth shut.

 

“You guys talked?” Seohyun asked nevertheless.

 

Seungri let out another sighs. “This morning…” he replied slowly.

 

“Then?” Seohyun asked again.

 

“I don’t know… Ahh… This is so ed up…” Seungri cursed to himself.

 

Judging on how Seungri is reacting, Seohyun gets it that Seunghyun might be going against whatever that Seungri is suggesting for.

 

“I can’t let him die, Seohyun… Not now… Not when I’m capable of doing something… Not when I can actually do something about it…” Seungri said. “10 years ago, I was just watching everything falling apart… I couldn’t do anything… But now, it’s different… I should be able to do something about it…” he continued.

 

Seohyun’s turn to cast a sigh this time as she listens to his words.

 

“I understand… But Seungri… The solution is not transplant… You got what I meant right?” Seohyun asked.

 

Seungri wrinkles as he looks up at his girlfriend, feeling weird with her words.

 

“Transplant, is a way… But that’s not a solution… You realized that even after the transplant, there is a risk that the new heart is not a match for him, right?” Seohyun said. “Even after the transplant, there can be a complication…”

 

“Are you saying that by not doing the surgery, is the best solution now?” Seungri replied with a higher tone.

 

Seohyun tries to stay calm when she realizes about his negative response.

 

“What am I trying to say is, I’m reminding you that there’s a risk in everything… Even you manage to make Seunghyun oppa to go through that surgery, there are possibilities,” Seohyun explained.

 

 

“And by making him undergo the surgery, there are chances for him to get better! Ahhhh! Not you too!!” Seungri said as he gets up from his chair harshly, walking away from Seohyun. “My hyung is in need of transplant, Seohyun! Without the new heart, he would die!!”

 

“If only the new heart is compatible….”

 

“And the only way to find out is by undergo that ing surgery! You don’t understand!” Seungri retorted.

 

“I understand Seungri!” Seohyun is trying her best to calm the situation down as she looks at Seungri who is losing his s at the moment.

 

“Then why are you going against me???”

 

“I am not!”

 

“Then this is what??? Questioning my judgment! I’m the doctor here, not you!” Seungri said angrily.

 

“I’m trying to make you understand the risk! Possibilities! I’m not a doctor but I’m sure as hell took medics just like you!” Seohyun attacked back.

 

“Then you should have known that this is the way!”

 

“I want you to think about it further… It’s your hyung’s call to make! Not you!”

 

“ing hell I care! He is losing his sense of judgment!”

 

“What the hell are you thinking!? That’s your hyung!”

 

“That I so desperately want to save but he refused!”

 

“Listen to his reason first, Seungri…”

 

“Reason!? That is ing obvious! It’s because Eun Hye’s heart!!!”

 

“The one who saved your life 10 years ago!!!” Seohyun said it out loud this time.

 

Seohyun’s words deserve a complete silence and the heated argument finally stops for once. Seohyun stares at Seungri who looks completely stunned by her words.

 

“You forget about her, don’t you…” Seohyun opens but softly this time. “Eun Hye? You mentioned her as Eun Hye?? Seungri… You were once claimed to me that she was the only noona that you adore the most and she was nothing but a gift to you and your family… She was irreplaceable… And now, you mentioned her name like she was some sort of big hindrance and a big burden to you??? Seungri, she took the bullet for you…”

 

Seungri gulps his saliva and looks away.

 

“I’m not trying to stop you from what you are doing… I’ve nothing against this surgery… This is the way… When I said about risk, you should think… At the end of the day, the one who is going to face the pain is your hyung… Not you… When we are talking about chances and possibilities, this time it meant as his calls to make, not you…” Seohyun said and then she moves slowly to Seungri who is looking away, refused to look at her. She touches his stiff left shoulder softly. “I’m telling you to let him decide… If he says yes, then it would be great to try… But if he says no, respect his decision… You already do what you are needed to do… You tried your best… But you are not a God, Seungri…” Seohyun said softly.

 

Seungri bites his lips as he listens to those words, having no words in return.

 

“This thing should remain as his choice… Not us…” Seohyun continued softly as she moves to face Seungri. She cups his face with her both hands, making him to look at her now. “He gave you everything that you want, letting you do whatever you want… But this time, isn’t it the right thing to let him decide peacefully?” Seohyun said.

 

Seungri bites his lips as he looks at his girlfriend, and the real emotions shown. He is scared.

 

“I bet all of my fortune that he’s going to say no…” Seungri answered slowly, with sadness in his tone.

 

“He already said no, Seungri… You remember?” Seohyun said.

 

Seungri shuts his eyes close while shaking his head and then he opens his eyes slowly before finally continue. “What will happen next Seohyun… I’m stuck… I saw him in the Emergency before, and I was stunned… I couldn’t do anything and I couldn’t even move… I want to save him so bad, Seohyun… So bad, till I’m more than willing to give him my own heart but we all know, that is not the way… Seunghyun hyung is everything to the family Seohyun… I don’t want anything happen to him… I know, I’m being pushy and selfish but this is the only way that I have now…” Seungri said.

 

“Seungri, have faith… If it was written that he meant to be with us longer, don’t worry… Because he will… But, if it’s otherwise, just gave him another million hearts, it won’t change the fact that he will leave us…” Seohyun replied.

 

“I don’t know what to say… I’m a mess and now I think he is pissed with what I said to him earlier this morning… And now I don’t know what to do… I’m stuck, Seohyun… I’m stuck…” Seungri said.

 

“Then go talk to him… This is Seunghyun oppa that we are talking about… He understands…” Seohyun coaxed.

 

Seungri looks momentarily thinking, considering Seohyun’s words.

 

“Seunghyun oppa might be mad before, but when it comes to his maknae… Trust me, he has nothing but forgiveness for you…”

******************************************************************************

No one is in the room right now except for Seunghyun, meanwhile others already went back home after getting a nagging session from him. He said he wants to be alone for a while and they should just go home and come later. He said he would be fine and what he wants now, just a quiet time for him. Well, looking at the Seunghyun’s mood, Jiyong, Taeyang, Yoona and Da Ra finally agreed to go back first and promise to come later. Jiyong doesn’t feel good about it at first but after being assured by Taeyang, he ended up agreed too.

 

Seunghyun starts to feel guilty right after they left the room but he just really not in the mood to talk or even to listen anything at the moment. He felt guilty for telling them to go home just now, he is also quite upset with Seungri’s words this morning and Jong Suk’s words was not really comforting for him. He feels suffocated in that room. He feels suffocated with everything that is in his mind.

 

“ this…”

 

Seunghyun uttered softly to himself softly. He looks around the room. It’s empty.

 

“Just what the hell am I doing right here…”

 

Seunghyun moves his both feet down and sit at the side of his bed. He stares at the small cupboard beside his bed, so he slowly moves down and opens the cupboard, just to see his belongings are in there, in the cupboard. He stares at his belongings in silent. His clothes, his pants, his watches and his shoes.

 

“I don’t care anymore…”

 

“Give the minute to me; I want to go through it one last time before I decide… I don’t think we can proceed with the project in Jeju for this time being… It’s too risky and why are we still waiting for the approval from the officer there??? It has been 2 months, Hye Jung…” Jiyong said in frustration as his eyes are still on the documents while the said secretary is sitting calmly in front of him.

 

“Their office is not picking up our call, Sir…” Hye Jung replied.

 

Jiyong lifts up his head and his expression is dead serious now.

 

“And why is that?” Jiyong asked.

 

“I think someone higher needs to go there and see for ourselves…” Hye Jung said.

 

Jiyong shakes his head.

 

“That’s impossible… Not now… Not when my hyung is warded, Hye Jung…” Jiyong said, rejecting the suggestion for him to fly to Jeju in the nearest time.

 

Hye Jung just nods her head in understanding, but both of them know that their current problem now really needs Jiyong’s personal attention which means Jiyong needs to go to Jeju to solve things.

 

“How’s he?” Hye Jung asked in concern.

 

Jiyong let out a heavy sighs at that question as he then throws down his pen and looks at Hye Jung with an upset expression. Hye Jung understands that face so well.

 

“He’s fine for now, but as usual, we don’t know… He’s in need for transplant again… I told you…” Jiyong said, as he leans on his back. Taking a rest for few minutes with Hye Jung after they have spent quite some times, brainstorming for the problem in hands.

 

“He said no?” Hye Jung asked.

 

“You knew him right…”

 

“There must be a reason for that…”

 

“There’s always is…”

 

“I would like to go and visit him, but I don’t think it would be a good idea, knowing your hyung for a long time… He would just chase me back to the office…” Hye Jung said with a small smile.

 

“He doesn’t want to worry you…” Jiyong said, understanding his hyung’s response.

 

“In fact he doesn’t want to worry everybody…” Hye Jung said.

 

Jiyong looks at Hye Jung for quite some time.

 

“You knew he’s not feeling so well before?” Jiyong asked.

 

This time, it’s Hye Jung’s turn to sigh.

 

“He said he was just tired… I thought the same, because looking at his piling meetings… He is still that workaholic man… And I couldn’t do much to stop him… I’m sorry Jiyong-sshi, for not telling you before… You know how your hyung can sometime be so….”

 

“Threatening?” Jiyong cuts her words.

 

Hye Jung smiles a bit and nods her head.

 

“He specifically asked me to shut my mouth and didn’t let me tell you…” Hye Jung said.

 

Jiyong nods his head weakly. That was so Seunghyun hyung. Secretive.

 

“How long he has been that way?” Jiyong asked again.

 

“Few months back…”

 

Jiyong shakes his head in return.

 

“What the hell was he thinking!? The last time he did this and now he is still doing it… I had enough of it… What’s making him think that by keeping this from us would do him any good?” Jiyong burst. “Last time, he hid it from us for 3 years Hye Jung! And this time? How long he wanted to keep it? I don’t see the reason why he should keep things from us about things like this and I hate it so much!”

 

“To avoid things like this…” Hye Jung suddenly opens .

 

Jiyong is taken aback with his secretary’s words.

 

“He hid it to avoid things like this… Your frustration and your wariness… In fact not just you, but everyone… It was a lucky thing that I came to know all about him, because I’m his secretary… Because if I’m not, I’m sure I won’t know too…” Hye Jung said. “Seunghyun-sshi is a very private person, Jiyong-sshi… And at the same time, he is someone who knows his dongsaengs so well and he just knew how you guys would react if you guys know about his condition… He himself doesn’t want to worry too, Jiyong-sshi… He doesn’t want to keep thinking about how things going to turn otherwise. I know that all of you won’t agree about his refusal for transplant. He is aware of this too… But Jiyong-sshi… Understands him… His reasons… He just spends the most of his life time, making things easier for all of you… The whole family… This time… Please, just make it easier for him… Because it’s never easy for him either…”

 

Jiyong frowns at those words and he hates that he understand the meaning of those words. Hye Jung is a person who has stand beside his hyung throughout many years. Since she was still single back then, till she’s already married and has kids. It is impossible for her not to know how Seunghyun is. The fact that an outsider understands his hyung better, hits him hard.

 

“I know I’m not in the place to say things like this, but I hope it will help you to understand him…” Hye Jung continued.

 

Jiyong moves to fix his position and he looks back at Hye Jung.

 

“Thank you Hye Jung… For telling me this…” Jiyong said softly.

 

Hye Jung nods her head with a comforting smile.

 

“And thank you very much for being there, for him at times us, his own family unable to be there for him…” Jiyong said.

 

“He loves you, Jiyong-sshi… You are always there for him too… He knows…” Hye Jung replied.

 

The sudden ringtone sound from Jiyong’s handphone breaking the silence between them. Jiyong moves to look at his phone and Seungri’s name appeared on the phone screen. He takes his phone and slides the screen to answer the call. He brings his phone to his left ear.

 

“Hello…” Jiyong said.

 

“Seunghyun hyung is missing!!”

 

It’s almost midnight, and every searches turns out to be a failure. The brothers already gathered back to the hospital after few hours of searching and calling. The nurses only aware about Seunghyun went missing when there is a warning from the monitor in their standby rooms and they ran to his wards, and there it goes, an empty bed and an empty cupboard. The patient just ran away and no one noticed. Seungri threw a blast to everyone when he found out about the situation, and then he called Jiyong, and told him everything. Which it leads to Taeyang and also Daesung knows about the current situation, and make a run to the hospital right away. They already asked their father just to go back home first while they continue to search for Seunghyun. They don’t want their father to worry too much and he going back and forth at the hospital won’t help anything.

 

They watched the hospital’s CCTV earlier, and they only managed to catch the footage of their hyung came out from his room in his usual clothes heading to the emergency stairs, but later they lost him. Their hyung might as well be a spy, because Taeyang suspected that Seunghyun might leave the hospital while disguising himself as someone else. They have been almost everywhere to find Seunghyun, his usual restaurants, his usual cafes, and even the place that he most likely would go, Eun Hye’s memorial place. Seunghyun is not even there at all. They reached a dead end in places to look for him now. They call everyone to ask about his whereabouts and even Jong Suk himself couldn’t think of any places that Seunghyun would go.

 

“Just what the hell is he thinking???” Seungri burst with his hands over his head, while sitting on the couch. The brothers are now gathered in Seunghyun’s empty room, while deciding whether they should inform the police or not.

 

“He maybe in needs of space…” Taeyang responded calmly while standing at the end of the empty bed and his eyes just stares emptily towards the bed.

 

“What if something happen to him, and we won’t know?” Jiyong asked in worried while sitting on the chair next to the bed.

 

“Let’s pray for it not to happen…” Daesung said while he is sitting on the side of the bed with his left thigh on the bed and he looks sadly towards the empty a bit messy bed. Nasal tube was left on the pillow, and that drip tube on the bed with a little bit of bloodstained on it. His hyung must have taken it off too hard.

 

“It’s always scary to stares at his empty bed, isn’t it? Without him around…” Daesung said softly.

 

Jiyong looks at Daesung, while Taeyang just keeps on staring on the bed and Seungri just purses his lips into a thin line, looking down at the floor quietly.

 

“We gather around together… But only four of us… Without him…” Daesung continued. “Scary isn’t it?” Daesung said with a small laughs this time. His left hand is caressing the bed sheet nonstop from before. “You guys think, how’s he going to react if he sees us gathering around like this, without him?”

 

“Ahhh… Finally grown up…” Taeyang reacted as if it’s Seunghyun’s reaction.

 

Jiyong’s lips turn up a bit in a small smile at that reaction. Their hyung might react that way.

 

“Ahh.. You guys can do better than this...” Daesung’s turns to imitate.

 

“Ahh.. No wine… You guys are losers…” Jiyong reacted.

 

The three of them laughs at the latest imitation from Jiyong. Their Seunghyun might react that way.

 

“There was one time, when we force him to follow us to play snooker randomly during the night and he was just too sleepy at that time. Thank god Taeyang manage to pull him into the car. He nagged at us big time and scolded us on how we should learn to go without him… He made it like a joke, and we really took it like a joke…” Daesung said as his words become softer in the end. “And now here we are… With four of us... Without him… Somehow, this situation makes me feel like he is giving us time out… Like when we were young… We fought and he asked us to stand together, facing the wall for hours… …”

 

“Oh, I remember that time…” Jiyong said as he reminisces the past when they were still kids as well. “We fought quite badly that time…”

 

“But we reconcile quickly after that…” Taeyang said. He remembers about it too.

 

“Where was Seungri that time?” Daesung asked his hyungs while his brain is working hard to remember because he knows, only the three of them were punished that time and Seungri was not there facing the wall with them.

 

Jiyong turns his view to Seungri who is too quiet from the very beginning, with his head down staring the floor, didn’t bother to joins his hyungs to their little trip to memory lane. He stares at his maknae in silent before finally opens his mouth.

 

“Seunghyun hyung played with him….. In Seunghyun hyung’s bedroom…” Jiyong said softly as he slowly remembers that particular moment even more clearly now.

 

Daesung’s eyes turn wide and then he turns to look at his quiet maknae and Taeyang do the same.

 

The door suddenly open and it take only a second to take everyone’s attention.

 

“Hyung!” Taeyang almost wanted to yell.

 

Daesung and Jiyong get up on their feet at the same time.

 

“Hyung!! Seriously!” Daesung exclaimed as he looks at their eldest hyung walks in, to them.

 

“What the hell, hyung…!” Jiyong scolded.

 

Seunghyun just smirks a bit at his dongsaengs reaction.

 

“Are you okay? Where did you go???” Taeayang asked as he walks closer to his hyung and looking up and down, just to make sure that their hyung is really alright.

 

Seunghyun still in his casual blue shirt and black pants, just smiles a bit to comfort his dongsaengs. Taeyang follows Seunghyun to the bed. The three brothers are basically surrounding their eldest hyung like puppies.

 

“Where the hell did you go? Why you disappeared like that??? We almost call the police, hyung!!” Jiyong continued as their hyung walks closer to the bed, still keeping his mouth shut, ignoring those scolding and nagging. Seunghyun finally lands at the side of the bed as his right hand smoothly taking off his watch at his left hand lazily. He looks tired after all.

 

“I’m taking off your shoes, okay…” Taeyang said as he kneels down to take off his hyung’s shoes.

 

“Kyaa.. You don’t even wear your coat! You are white as sheet, hyung…” Daesung said as he puts his left hand on Seunghyun’s right shoulder, massaging it a bit. It is stiff and he can feel that Seunghyun is taking deep breaths all the time. He stares at his hyung’s pale face. Seunghyun needs the doctor’s attention now and he needs to use the nasal tube back. “I’m calling the doctor okay…” Daesung said softly this time as he then turning around to call Jong Suk, but his eyes stop at someone. He stops moving. There is a doctor in the room.

 

Jiyong who is busily tendering to Seunghyun, suddenly looks at Daesung who stops and he follows his dongsaeng’s eyes. Their maknae is staring from the couch. He doesn’t move an inch.

 

“Err… Seungri-ahh…” Daesung hesitated for a moment. He doesn’t feel good when he looks at Seungri’s expression now. Taeyang turns around as he heard that.

 

Daesung’s hesitates voice also managed to pull Seunghyun’s attention as he then looks up directly to the couch which he didn’t even bother to look before when he came in. Seungri is staring at him while sitting on the couch and that look on his face, Seunghyun gets it right away. His maknae is ing mad at him. Well, he expected this when he decided to pull this stunt before.

 

“Are you acting out because of my words this morning???” Seungri finally opens his mouth.

 

Seungri’s cold high tone is causing everyone to be taken aback with that sudden confrontation.

 

Taeyang gulps his saliva at Seungri’s behavior right now. This won’t end well.

 

“Not now Seungri,” he warned.

 

“I asked you hyung… Are you acting out because of my words this morning?” Seungri repeated and clearly ignoring Taeyang’s warning.

 

“Seungri, Seunghyun hyung needs….” Jiyong couldn’t finish his words when suddenly Seungri cuts in.

 

“Let’s end it now, so we don’t need to talk about it again…” Seungri harsh tone is just making everyone shutting their mouths. “This ty stunt that you just pulled… Is it because of my words?” Seungri asked again, and this time he making it clears that he won’t repeat his question again.

 

Seunghyun just slowly his shirts while finally looking away from his maknae.

 

“No, Seungri…” Seunghyun replied softly.

 

That soft reply from his eldest hyung just breaks his heart, as he just asked his hyung in a harsh cold tone, but his Seunghyun just answered him softly, like he usually did but Seungri is still mad. So mad that he can go crazy. He is already so worried about his hyung and just now Seunghyun just went missing without a word. He wants to burst out so bad at his hyung.

 

Seungri finally gets up from the couch as his eyes are still on Seunghyun who still looking at the floor in silent.

 

“If you don’t want that transplant, that’s fine… I won’t bring it up to you anymore and I won’t talk about it anymore… Let’s not even think about it anymore… That’s even better…” Seungri said as he walks away leaving his hyungs in stunned. Seungri walks to the door coldly but he stops midway, and turn around to look at Seunghyun before he opens his mouth one more time.

 

“But don’t you dare disappear without a word like that anymore hyung… Because the stunt that you just pulled; it was just too ing selfish!”