*****

Let’s get this straight. Jiyong and I know so well, our roles in each other’s lives. There’s a fine line between friendship and love that we will never cross.

*JIYONGIE CALLING*

“Oh!” my heart raced fast strangely. Doctor Nam chuckled. “Right on time!” she stood up with a huge, teasing smile on her face. “I still have some studying to do. Pick up that call now” she pointed at my phone on the table with her lips “Your BROTHER is waiting”. Without even waiting for my reaction, she turned around and walked off.

This is driving me crazy!

“Hey!” there’s awkwardness in my voice. I can tell that he’s in the recording studio for loud music is blasting in the background. “What’s up?” his voice is lively.

His ‘What’s up’ means a lot of things. 1. What are you doing as of the moment? 2. How are you? 3. What are your plans for today?

Taking a deep breath, I exhaled heavily, slowing my heart beat. “Remember Doctor Nam?” I asked while finishing my food.

Silence.

“Your mentor?” he spoke after a while. I swallowed and nodded as if he can see me. “Yeah. She’s here for a few days to assist demos”. “I see”. The music in the background faded. I can hear men talking. “Have you eaten already?” he asked.

My cheeks suddenly felt hot. I touched it and rolled my eyes. “Just finished. How about you?”

He said goodbye to someone (I think it’s Seungri), cleared his throat and answered. “I’m just going to finalize a track then eat”. I hissed. “Yah! You’re so strict to me when it comes to eating and here you are, doing the opposite of what you preach”

Truth is, we have the same eating habits when busy. We forget hunger, for we’re too occupied to do something about it. However, he’s much worse than me because he can last eating only snacks for days (two days, max).

“Are you really going to meet ‘online dude number two?’” he sounded as if he’s teasing. I’m actually waiting for him to open this up.

Walking back to my office, “Yep! He already texted me the name of the bar and what time he’s going to perform”.

Another moment of silence.

With a sigh. “Where?”

“hmm…” I searched for the message. “Here! It’s at Yogiga Bar, corner of Hongdae near Hapjeong station. He’s gonna be on stage by ten-thirty”

“I know that bar. There are a lot of performers there”. Of course he knows! Jiyong might be busy, but whenever he’s off work and feels like it, he and his friends go to different places with good music and food.

Actually, I’m really not into live music bars, simply because I find it less fun than the clubs (though I only get to go clubbing once in a blue moon).

“Do you wanna go?” I have a strong feeling that he’s going to say yes. Having him around just like my last date, is very comforting.

Long silence.

I already reached my office.

“Nope” he said, and it made me stop walking. “I have a meeting with Hyun Suk hyung this afternoon and have a couple more tracks to polish after”. With a sigh, I walked in my office and sat on my chair. “Oh. Ok” is all I was able to say.

So bad. It would really be nice to bring him there. Music of any kind will surely inspire him to do beyond his mastered music.

As much as I want to convince him to come, I let him be, since he seems to be on a roll with his recording. Once he’s on this stage, all you got to do is leave him alone, for in the end, a masterpiece will surely be made.

“Just call me if something comes up, you know what I mean”. He sighed. I smiled because he’s really so caring.

“Yah! Don’t think that this date will be an epic failure again. Instead, pray for it to go by smoothly. Cross fingers, he may be the one”. My voice turned dreamy in a snap.

Silence.

Ten seconds.

Fifteen.

Twenty.

Thirty.

Finally, “Take it slow, alright?”

By ‘slow’ he means, NO showing off too much interest.

Areumie dating tip: There are some men who tends to be so confident, knowing you’re so into them. So, keep things (emotions and feelings), in, for the meantime.

                                        NO intimate gestures

Areumie dating tip: Men LOVES to touch, BUT REMEMBER ladies, YOU JUST MET, being so touchy-touchy is a NO-NO! The farthest you can go is hitting his arm playfully, while giggling like you’re being tickled by a million feathers all over your body.

                                       YES to flirting

Areumie dating tip: A date without flirting is like an ice cream without flavor. JUST REMEMBER: Don’t exaggerate. Keep calm and act cutesy. Too much can come off cheap, believe me.

“Noted Jiyongie!” I told him firmly, making him laugh. And then he sighed. “Enjoy!” he just spitted the word without even a drop of sincerity in it.

My shift ended two hours before the date. So, I went home, took a shower to shed off stress and be fresh, and dressed not too smart and formal. This date is as casual as it can be, my tight black dresses can rest for the night.

In a light grey sweatshirt, skinny jeans with cuts on both knees, and embossed silver loafers, I get out of the door. I’m in my most casual clothes, one of the few times I dressed like it for a date. Good thing, I can still pull it off.

Taking the subway instead of using my car, I anxiously waited until I reached the place. The bar, like most of them, is very cozy. It’s not as big as the bars I’ve been, but more relaxed.

It’s already ten when I arrived. A duo is on stage, singing acoustic covers of the most popular pop songs as of the moment. I looked around and a lot of tables are already taken.

“Areum?” someone called from behind me. I turned around and saw a guy about Jiyong’s height, only slightly taller. He looks as light as Jiyong, before serving his military duties (he’s slightly buff now). His hair is shaved on the sides, remaining hair in the middle, brushed to the back in a ponytail. I don’t know if it’s just me, but he’s kind of channeling G-dragon, only with a rocker feeling.

“Hi!” I extended my arm. He took my hand comfortably with a smile.

THIS if the FIRST TIME I’m saying this after being in a lot of dates: There’s no awkwardness. I don’t know if it’s because he’s younger than me, or if his aura is just so light.

Hong Shik led me to our table, right in front of the stage. “I had this reserved for you, for me to see you clearly while performing”

Smooth! Rockstar signature smoothness. They know their way to women’s hearts.

After settling down, he handed me the menu. “Choose whatever you want. Food, drinks, whatever catches your eyes”. His smile never leaves his face. But because I grabbed a sandwich at the convenience store on the way here, I’m just ordering a drink.

With a smile, I said, “I’m just going for some cocktails”.

cocktails – are non-alcoholic drinks, perfect for non-drinkers and workers who cannot take a hangover the next day.

Areumie’s dating rule: No heavy liquor, even low alcohol beers. This way, you’re in your right mind the whole time. Having alcohol in your system can lead to so many unfortunate events. Being sober, especially on your first date, is a good starter. Trust me, your date is going to be meaningful. Also, the chances of you, waking up in somebody else’s bed is slim.

“A Shirley Temple will do” I told him, not even looking at the menu yet.

Without any word, he ordered it for me, and asked for a glass of water without ice for himself. “You don’t drink?” he asked, leaning a little closer to me. I looked at him and smiled. “I drink, but I don’t feel like it tonight”.

He smiled warmly. “Nice!”

My drink was served the same time he was called to the stage. Being alone is kind of weird, thinking that I’m on a date.

Without wasting any second of his given time to perform, he started singing, while playing the guitar. My heart leaped when he was introduced as the most promising Indie act of his generation. This means that he’s good. I wonder why he’s not mainstream.

First song: Creep.

I always hear this being sung by idols, bands, and even celebrities. Jiyong and I used to duet to this song in the karaoke way back early 2000s.

As time goes by, I feel more connected to him. Maybe because I’m familiar of what he do.

Argh! I suddenly remembered my conversation with Doctor Nam at the hospital a while ago. Why did I even said yes to her question? I could’ve lied.

Last song: Butterfly.

Yes, G-dragon’s Butterfly from his first solo album. This song is memorable to him. One of my favorites amongst all that he’s written.

In all fairness to Hong Shik, he put a different flare to the song, making it sweeter. Jiyong will surely appreciate it once he hears it.

“I guess it’s real” I said the moment he settled on the chair beside me.  He looked at me in confusion. I chuckled. “That you’re one of the most promising act of your generation”. He rested his elbow on the table and faced me. “Don’t buy it. I’m not”. I slapped his arm. “You’re just being humble!”

The night is still young (at least for him). He told me that he got another gig in a different bar. I’m not surprised that he’s hopping from one to another, because he performs really well.

“Do you wanna come? That is, if it’s not going to affect your work tomorrow”. Notice that he’s not calling me Noona? It’s because from the very first time we talked, I already told him that I don’t want to be called Noona, that for as long as he knows how to respect me, I’m fine without honorifics.

Time check: Eleven-twenty.

My duty tomorrow is eight in the morning, for I have an operation demo to observe (Doctor Nam forced me to it).

One of the many things Hong Shik still doesn’t know about me is, my job. Well, according to a blog that I’ve read years ago, when creating an online dating account, your job (no matter what it is), should be hidden at least until you know the person you’re talking or dating, deeper. This prevents you of being used.

“Truth is”. Hong Shik seemed like he’s not the kind of person who is going to take advantage. “I’m needed at work early in the morning” I said. “But, I can give up two hours of sleep. I’ll leave before one”

And I made him smile, so cutely but manly, that made my stomach turn (in a good way). I can feel a spark between us, even though it’s still too early to say.

Off we go to Sang Sang Madang in Hongdae. The ambiance of the first bar and this is not so different, only the music, which is more on rock and roll than acoustic.

“What time are you going to perform?” I asked comfortably. To my surprise, he moved his chair closer to mine, closing the gap between us. “Twelve-forty five”.

Oh no! I’m planning to leave around that time.

“I’m afraid I won’t be able to watch” I told him sadly. Then he snapped. “I’ll just cancel my performance then”.

Shocked. “No! Don’t do that!”

He chuckled. “No. It’s fine. After all, I’m not in the mood for another set. Let’s just enjoy ourselves here and, get to know each other more”.

We started talking over tall glasses of Iced tea. Hong Shik told me a little about his family – his father left them just a few weeks after his younger brother was born. He and other two brothers took the heavy responsibility at home, each working at an early age just to bring food on the table. Their Mother helps them with money, but they made her stop working after being sick. Two years ago, his two older brothers got married, leaving their family in his care. Even with plans of going to college, he dropped it for a rare shot in the music industry. With his band, he led them to a music label, where they were taken in as trainees. During this time, they are not making money, for the given allowance is just enough for their personal needs, that leads him to the decision of quitting the band. So, with only the things he learned from training, he looked for places to play in and even performed on the streets for money.

“If you don’t mind…” I gave out a small smile. He smiled back. “How much do you make in a day? It’s all right not to answer if you think it’s too personal” I said, assuring him.

Another first. In all the dates I’ve been to, I never ask nor care about how much money the guy makes.

Relaxed and not at all offended, he sighed. “The biggest I can take home is fifty thousand won a night. That is, if I booked three gigs. The smallest is twenty, usually from small bars. I earn a little compared to the others because I don’t go to high-end bars, for other artists are squeezing themselves in, making it so hard to even have a gig in a week or sometimes a month”.

The struggle is real. I remember Jiyong training every day at YG, going home late and tired and hungry, and always wondering when he’s going to be given a shot to show what he got. But you know? He never say that he wants to give up already. Rather, he worked harder, dreaming and hoping, one day, his time will come and the world’s going to know his name.

“I know someone who went through the hardships you’re going through. I saw how hard it was and how far he has to travel just to get to the place he’s at, right now”. Sharing something that I think is inspirational, helps. “His star is too far to reach, impossible actually. But when you know you have what it takes, passion and your heart is so into it, you’ll get your star with only a stretch of your arm. Don’t lose the fire in you. Be hungry for what you want, but don’t starve yourself coz once you do, you’ll let go of that dream to find something to fill yourself up”.

Seeing Hong Shik smile after my ‘piece’, is satisfying. For a man (notice I used man instead of boy), he listens well.

After that, I feel more comfortable to him. I told him about myself, including my job. Like the others, he got shocked that I’m a Doctor because as they say, ‘You don’t look like one’, which is both a compliment and not to me. I also told him about my best friend without dropping a name (he needs to know that my BFF is a guy, to prevent misunderstandings in the future).

“Too bad I need to go home already”. I’m enjoying his company. The more I get to know him, the more fun it gets. He gave me a side hug. “There’s going to be a next time, right? This won’t be the first and the last”.

Oh yeah! This definitely is not the last.

I looked into his eyes, to realize that he has the same eye color like Jiyong, which made me feel weird. I swear, I can see a little of him in Hong Shik. SO WEIRD.

“I’ll watch you if I have time, just tell me where and what time” I told him sincerely and he smiled sweetly, AGAIN.

“I can still call you every day, right?”

I touched his shoulder and squeezed it lightly. “Of course”

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

“Oh!” I gasped in surprise. “Jiyongie!”

Hong Shik’s eyes go big. “GD!”

                                             *******

                                                                                                ******