{G-dragon, now in a relationship}

Finally, after years of being single, one of the most eligible bachelors in Asia is off the market. Rumors of him dating another Supermodel circulated weeks ago but was not confirmed. Well, now it is!

Lena Blair (28), a Paris- based Supermodel was seen outside YG Entertainment office, followed by the Big Bang leader, mid-afternoon, yesterday. They drove off together in G-dragon’s sports car. That night, they were spotted at a five star hotel where the Supermodel is staying. G-dragon left, morning the next day in the same clothes he’s wearing the previous day. With this, fans started speculating that maybe what the two are more than friends already.

Earlier today, Lena Blair’s publicist confirmed the relationship, saying that the new couple are happy with their decision to become official. She added, that the two promised to work on their relationship each and every day. YG Entertainment, G-dragon’s management, doesn’t want to comment on it yet, saying that they have not spoken to the Superstar yet.

I woke up with a throbbing head and is not in the mood to do anything at all. As much as I want to skip this day off work, I dragged myself to do everything that has to be done, including smiling, even when it’s so hard to pull out one.

“Knock! Knock!” Dr. Miller peeked in my office. His smile is so beautiful, as usual.

Putting a medical report down, I took a deep breath and exhaled heavily, hoping to feel lighter. “Hey!” I pointed him to the chair in front of my desk and he sat on it, eyes fixed on me.

“What’s up?” he is one bubbly ball that is very comforting. I just shrugged and he smirked. “Your aura is not that great today, Dr. Jeong”

Lying is my only way out to not talk about Jiyong. I’ve been trying to sweep off thoughts of him, but he always comes back in. “I’m good! A little tired, but I feel good”

It’s obvious that he’s not buying it. His eyes never left my face as I try my best to put on a happy mask. “Know what?” he moved his chair closer to my desk, leaning forward, elbows on it. “It’s OK to admit that you’re not OK”

Yes, I know that, but hiding my feelings is where I’m comfortable at. Talking about the matter will crush and crumble every inch of my being, and I’m not prepared for it.

“He’s not in a relationship” I finally spitted out. “He’s with someone new. Another girl who will get him out of the box I put him in for so long”. Tears started rolling down my cheeks that I wiped off right away. “Let’s not talk about it”

Dr. Miller held my hand and smiled. “No” he said firmly, “I want you to talk about it so much until you get sick of it”

Gosh! Why does he have so much in common with Jiyong? That man never gets tired of my rants. In fact, he likes it when I rant even though I know it’s too much for him. By the end of it, he will ask me if I’m done and if I feel better. If I tell him I feel better, he will my back and say something comforting. If I still don’t feel better, he will let me rant some more until I get tired of it and just drop it.

“The person I considered mine for so long is now good without me”. Saying this doubled the pain. I never thought I’ll be able to say it. “We’re changing, and I’ve just been too frightened to acknowledge it”. Sudden realizations reeled in, making me cry harder.

Sympathetic, Dr. Miller walked to me, turned my swivel chair to face him and bend down in front of me, meeting my eyes. “Change is evolution. You are going against nature if you refuse to evolve. You shouldn’t stop it, and you can’t stop it”

“I know that, but it hurts so much. I think now I can understand why everybody thinks I’m stupid”. As much as I hate to admit it, I know I am one big stupid , for I already have the best in my hand and I still had the guts to let it go.

Dr. Miller smirked and shook his head, “You are not stupid. You just let your mind takeover you, and there’s nothing wrong with it. Letting him go is an option you know will do him good. He and the people will not be able to see your vision yet. As a matter of fact…” he sighed and wiped my tears with his thumb. “Maybe they won’t. And it’s all good because as long as you see it and you’re satisfied of it, nothing matters!”

Well, maybe the best has indeed passed, at least I was able to feel how it is to have the best. I’m hurting because I’m afraid of things I’m yet to figure out, but I know by the end of it all, my fears will be washed away, especially when I see Jiyong, happy and contented caused by the freedom I gave him.

“I wish him well” I said, sobbing “I want him to be loved more than what I gave him. I hope Lena will fill his heart with happiness and never break it, because I don’t know what to do if she happens to”

Jiyong is no good in heartbreaks. Yes, he shows strength and swag most of the time, but the moment he’s alone, he cries himself to sleep, grieving for what he lost.

“It can be that if their relationship don’t work, yours may rekindle”. This statement from Dr. Miller made me think differently of him. I feel like, even when he has feeling for me, in one way or another, he’s still rooting for Jiyong and I, which is unlikely.

“Keep this in mind…” he held my hand and squeezed it affectionately, “If someone is the right person for you that someone will spring back into your life no matter how far he has drifted away”

His words are so beautiful. This guy has so much wisdom is his system that is very helpful to people in need of them. Dr. Miller impressed me so much, that I think it won’t be too hard to love him. I will not be shocked if one day I wake up feeling differently towards him already.

Smiling genuinely, “Thank you” I told him, and next thing I know it, our faces are just inches away from each other, our eyes are glued. My heart is beating faster.

No! Don’t get into it. It’s not right, Areumie!

The voice in my head failed to bring me back to my senses. Dr. Miller moved forward, cupped my face with both hands and crashed his lips to mine, not giving me time to back out. I kissed him back and felt nothing but regret.

He pulled out after a while, “Oh, I’m sorry!”

Embarrassed, “Don’t apologize. There’s no need” I told him coolly.

I can see so many emotions of his face. His eyes have worry in them. Maybe he’s worried that I might push him away after this.

“No” he held both my hands and looked straight into my eyes. “I should’ve controlled myself. I should’ve not done it. Not when you’re too vulnerable”

I playfully punched him on the chest, “Don’t worry about it. I’m not as vulnerable as you think I am. Just think that, that kiss is my way of thanking you for all the good words you shared to make me feel better today”

To be very honest, the reason why I’m not even a bit shaken of that kiss is because I know that it will not lead to something beyond it. Dr. Miller knows his place, maybe he just cannot contain his feelings a while ago.

“mmm…” From the way he looked at me, I can tell he’s going to say something important. “I know that it’ll be long until you can get over GD completely, but I just want you to know that I’ll be waiting for that day to come, and if it doesn’t, I will love you still, regardless”

One word to describe Aden Miller? WONDERFUL!

Because of what he said, I suddenly wanted to try getting over Jiyong that I’m guilty of not doing at all. Getting over him romantically is not going to be easy, but it’s not impossible. Maybe all I have to do is start seeing him the way I see him before our relationship.

With that in mind, I continued working. I attended two meetings and lead a simulation. Days ago, a ten year old patient was rushed to the hospital for severe headache, only to find out that one of her veins popped, causing extreme internal bleeding. We were able to do something about it temporarily. My team and I are working hard to get into surgery as soon as possible.

“Oh?”

Dami Unnie texted me, asking me to call her once I’m free. Good timing, because my shift is already done.

“Areumie” her voice is too serious. It’s not like her.

Hoping to lower her level of seriousness, “Unnie!” I greeted cheerfully.

“What’s this I heard that you wanted to move to another apartment far from here?”

That. Well, I’m considering moving to another place, and it’s not solely because I want to keep distance from Jiyong. I also want to try to live away from my comfort zone, for me to learn how not to be dependent to the family. And, I’m not going really far.

“You’re nuts!” Unnie yelled. “And it’s not just you who is, but Jiyong as well”. I can feel her anger through the phone and it scared me, because it’s so rare of her to lash out. “I read an article about him being in a relationship with Lena. I tried calling him but he’s not answering. So, I called Omma, and she confirmed it”, then she sighed “Seriously guys, what’s happening? Yes! There is a slim chance for you two to get back together, but why do I feel like you are doing these crazy things just to get over each other? I get it, you want Jiyong to date. It’s all cool with me too. All this time I thought he’s still looking for himself to be whole again, just to know that he wasn’t looking for anything, he’s suddenly in something which in my opinion is so dumb! He doesn’t even know that girl well enough to take her in his life!”

I can fully understand where Unnie is coming from. She’s just like us who can feel change is coming and is too scared to go by it. After all, it’s really not easy to see two people, so close, starting to fall out.

“Unnie, maybe distance is what Jiyong and I really need. It doesn’t mean that we’re going to be strangers, we will just live like two individuals unlike when we live, move, and think as one. Shocking, but Jiyong in a new relationship now might be his way of getting a grip of life once again. I’m happy for him. And I think as his siblings, we should just support him”

Without a word, Dami Unnie hanged up. She’s too upset. I know it’ll take some time for her to get over it.

“Huh?”

I’m at the Day Care to fetch Yong, but the head teacher told me that he’s not there anymore.

“Mr. Kwon picked him up” she said, and it didn’t surprise me.

“Got it. Thanks!” I said.

I can pull out myself from Jiyong but I can never pull my son off him. Yong shouldn’t be affected by our issues. I will not hide him from Jiyong. He can still be his Father figure if he wanted to.

“Aish!” I threw my phone on the passenger seat. I’ve been calling Jiyong since I got in the car, but he’s not picking up. “Seriously?” And now, I’m on voicemail. “Jiyongie, where are you? I just went to the Day Care and they said you have Yong”

I’m already near my apartment and there’s no response, still. I have a strong feeling that they’re either at YG or his apartment. I’ll just freshen up before heading there because I’m too haggard to even look human. No. The thought of him running away with my son is so impossible. Jiyong wouldn’t think of that.

“Omo!” I jumped out upon seeing an inflatable mini pool, full of colorful play balls in the living room. It’s new.

Odd. It seems like they’re here all along.

“You’re home” he said while bouncing Yong to sleep.

They are in my room. The curtains drawn, not even a ray of light can come in, only Yong’s car lampshade is on

“Hi!” I greeted and carefully put my things down on the bed.

This is too awkward for my sanity.

“I cannot pick up your calls because Yong keeps on having a meltdown. The staffs from the Day Care said that he’s not in a good mood since you dropped him off. He keeps on crying and doesn’t even want to be held. They were able to calm him down but becomes fuzzy again after a while” he said, almost in a whisper.

My poor child. What seems to be the problem?

“Actually….” Jiyong is so formal. I’m not used to it. I suddenly want to playfully punch his arm to loosen him up. “I brought him to the Doctor just to make sure his meltdowns is not caused by some pain”

I am a Pediatrician but my son is not my patient as suggested by every Doctor that I know. Why? To not be biased. You know us, Mothers, we’re so into our children that we don’t take the wrong in them that well. Also in this way, I won’t be as paranoid whenever I can’t detect what’s going on with him (Believe it or not, when you’re dealing with babies, it’s really hard). And, it’s much better to have another person looking out for his health, just because two heads are better than one.

“You should’ve went to my office” I told him.

He sighed. “I did, but your assistant said you’re doing your rounds”

I just nodded. “What did Dr. Park say?” I checked on Yong who is already sleeping comfortably.

He stopped bouncing and looked straight into my eyes. It made me flinch but I was able to gain composure. “There’s nothing wrong. She said maybe Yong is just really having a bad day. That’s all”

Well, yeah. He woke up crying and is also crying while I’m giving him a bath. Babies. Once they started the day the wrong way, it’ll carry on till the end.

“He looks fine” I brushed my son’s hair off his face, making him wince.

Jiyong sighed. “Of course, you’ll know if something is wrong with him anyway. One, coz you’re his Mother. Two, coz you’re a Doctor. I, on the other hand, can only tell when he pooped”

This awkward talk is completely new to me to the point that I feel like I’m talking with a stranger. Our movements are calculated, making my body ache for controlling myself not to move too much.

“I’ll put him down then leave” he walked to the crib and carefully placed Yong on it. He lightly tapped him on his thigh when my son started moving. “I still have things to do” he faced me, after making sure that Yong is already in deep slumber.

Quietly, we walked out of the room. I’m just tailing him. I didn’t even notice that he’s wearing the shirt I bought for him years ago, the one he loves to wear in times when he just want to be comfortable and laid back (You might’ve seen him wearing it in airports).

All of a sudden, he stopped walking and turned to face me. “I’m….” he took a breath and exhaled heavily. “I’m going to Paris with Lena”. The way he said it is so casual.

With an empty mind and without sensible words to say, “Nice!” I said.

Maybe they’re really getting serious. Knowing Jiyong, he doesn’t leave things here right away if it’s not for important matters. Usually, he finishes his work first before doing anything else, and from what I know, he’s working on a project with TOP as of the moment.

“The plan is, I’m going to stay there for six months” he added, making me look at him in disbelief, “Or….more”

Woah! That’s longer than I expected. I’m truly surprised about it. All I can do is stare at him.

Six months. I wouldn’t be seeing him for that long, same goes with Yong. And though I’m used to him leaving all the time, the fact that our relationship (as best friends), is on the rocks, I’m thrown. In that span of time, so many things can happen. The biggest drag is, he won’t be here on Yong’s birthday.

“Have a safe trip, then!” I told him with a fake smile on my face. “Enjoy Paris!”

Silence.

After a while, he smirked. “You know what? You are the reason for my constant loneliness. As much as I hate to say it, but you are. You keep on upsetting me, disappointing me, hurting me. I’m just too blind to see or maybe too foolish to notice”. While saying all these to me, he’s pointing a finger at me (something he’s never done before). “I won’t try to squeeze myself into a world you want to build without me. I’m so over taking care of you and cleaning after your !” and he walked away.

Hurt, I followed him to the door. “At last you tell me all these. I’m just waiting to hear it. Goodbye!”

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