Disclaimer : I have not meant any disrespect for Running Man China, the reality program or its staff or any particicpants, by this fic, I mean no harm. This is solely my imagination. I don't mean that the program or any of it's sponsors force any artist to take part in shows, no it's not. This is a figment of imagination. I mean no insult or disrespect or offense towrds the program, sponsors, its participants or staff, directors and producers.

(I also a big fan of the show, I watch RM China every Friday, so that I can laugh to leave my stress behind)

This is angst because the emotions I go through is just so overwhelming. I will be back with fluff sooner. until then enjoy please.

word count : 3063

Lu Han rests his head on the cool stone wall, closing his eyes, leaning his heavy body to the wall. He doesn’t feel well, no, not at all. All he wants to do is to curl up under his comforter and sleep like he is never going to wake up. He is oh so tired and he knows that he can sleep straight a month.

But he cannot.

He is not allowed to.

He is paying the price for being famous.

He is an idol and he cannot change anything now.

Sometimes he wishes that he would wake up as the fifteen year old boy who was just a happy teen with bubbly friends, who excelled in studies, who ace in football.

But he is not.

He sighs moving forward. He feels that the little crew following him, recording his movements is worried. He shakes his head and smiles at them assuring that he is okay. He has to look for the clues to find out who is the culprit in the team today. He knows he isn’t the one but he didn’t miss the suspicious look Chen He ge gave him earlier.

Lu Han is exhausted. He is not for anymore games but he has three more hours to go before call it a day.

He stepped outside. Winter winds are gnawing at his bones as he shivers but still he has to look for clues. He walks to the flower beds and crouches down, observing through plants. He sees something shiny among the clusters of leaves and flowers. He pulls the object and it’s a box with a gold lid. When he opens it, there is a rolled up paper, a written clue. Lu Han unfolds the paper and try reading the long paragraph. His headache is not helping.

He stands up from the ground, almost stumbles back to the ground, feeling so dizzy all of a sudden. The paper slips from his hand, falling to the ground as he clutches his head, groaning.

“Are you alright?”

One of his crew members asks while the other one steadies him on his feet. Lu Han tries to dismiss them with a fake smile plastered on his dry lips.

“Xiao Lu?”

His senior, Deng Chao ge approaches him, concern evident in his voice. Lu Han smiles weakly.

“I am okay, just a headache.”

Chao doesn’t seem to be convinced as he steps closer to the boy, his palm pressing on Lu Han’s forehead.

“You are little warm, too warm for someone who stayed outside for a while.”

Lu Han shakes his head and says there is nothing to worry about. But Chao ignores his words, wrapping his arm around Lu Han’s shoulder like a protective father, guiding him to the indoors. Lu Han sighs, bit relieved to have someone accompanying him but more worried because they will have to stop everything just because of him. Everyone is busy with their own schedules and no one has extra minutes just because he was not feeling well.

Pull your together Lu Han!

Lu Han hears an ugly voice mocking him. He takes a deep breath as they reaches to the inside of the big mansion.

“Really Chao ge, I am okay. It is just a little headache. I am really fine”

Lu Han says, smiling as bright as he can. He is an actor after all; he has years of practice at pretending to be fine. He is a master of this.

Chao watches him little suspicious. He saw Lu Han stumbling and swaying. But here he is now, smiling and bubbly, just as new born baby.

“Are you sure Xiao Lu?”

He asks still clutching Lu Han’s hand. Lu Han smiles, nodding his head fast, trying to convince him enough. Only god knows how much his head hurts, a mere move causes more pain, shaking his head means burning hell. But Lu Han endures much.

Chao nods his head agreeing. Lu Han seems to be fine.

“Oh, I found a clue earlier. But I think I dropped it there”

Chao laughs a little. For a twenty five year old, this boy is still so innocent and pure.

“You stay here Xiao Lu, I will go get that clue for you. I promise to not to read it but to bring you.”

“It’s okay Chao ge, I trust you. You can read it if you want.”

Lu Han smiles so innocently. Chao pats his hand before disappearing back to the garden outside.

When Chao is no longer there, Lu Han thinks he should move further. He needs to find a place to rest. He is becoming nauseous as his headache grows with every step he takes. It doesn’t take long to get his vision blurring and his eyes burning. He rubs his eyes and it gets bit better He feels oddly hot inside. He shrugs off the coat he is wearing and s the first two buttons of his shirt.

“I need something to drink.”

He mumbles, throat dry as sand, taking shaky steps forward, his shoes thumping the floor softly. Lu Han turns to left, entering another corridor. He stops as the edges of his vision darken. Lu Han closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, his mind chanting I am Okays, ignoring the agony in his head as if it is split into two.

“Oh Xiao Lu!”

He hears Zheng Kai’s enthusiastic voice and two sets of quick steps reaching him, in his blurred vision what he sees is two shadows approaching him.

“Chao was looking for you”

He realizes that the second voice is belonged to Li Cheng. But he cannot stop now. It’s too exhausting to pretend and go on. Lu Han, for once, think that it is okay to feel like a normal human being. He lets his body to shut down, to agony to take him down, to darkness to engulf his word.

Li Cheng sprints forward almost knocking down startled camera men, just in time reach to the falling body, securing him from the fall. He cradles the boy to his chest, patting his cheek softly. Zheng Kai crouches down to them, shaking Lu Han’s shoulder.

When he doesn’t open his eyes, Li Cheng scoops him up. Zheng Kai nods his head, both of them in a silent agreement.

Lu Han is laid on a couch, a thin blanket covering him, his shallow breaths filling the silent room. The doctor puts his stethoscope away, nodding to himself, getting up. He pats Lu Han’s head, whose eye lids are drooping from the much needed sleep.

“Sleep now little one, you will be fine.”

He says before stepping out of the room, to the waiting crowd.

“He is exhausted. He needs a rest for a few days.”

A disgruntled noise could be heard, that is from the producer of the show, but he sighs afterwards as glares are thrown at his direction by other six celebrities standing there.

“I need to have a word with his… manager I suppose”

The middle aged doctor asks searching for the particular man. A young man steps forward from side, biting his lip.

“I am not his manager, more like his best friend. Manager is currently not here, so..”

He trails off, as doctor nods at