*Doojoon*

"So? Are you, or are you not ready?" President-nim asked.

Gi Kwang looked at me helplessly. He wasn't ready, of course he wasn't. I wasn't either.

President-nim caught the look. "We pushed all of it back for you, Gi Kwang. So that you could be there for your wife. The asian tours, the lastest showcase in Japan, we pushed it back to another date. We could only work Beast in Korea. But now, I don't see anymore reason to push them any further. Your wife's awake and recovering. Leaving her for a few months wouldn't hurt. Her keomonim can take care of her when you're gone."

Gi Kwang stared at president-nim silently. He didn't want to go. He didn't want to leave Lia, especially since we were trying our hardest to make her remember us. He was scared that if he left, Lia was going to slip further away from him, to the point that he couldn't get her back at all.

Gi Kwang looked at me again, and I saw it in his eyes that he wanted me to make the decision. I stared at him meaningfully and past a silent message that if I made the decision, he had to follow it. Even if the decision I made was not what he wanted. I was deciding on what was best for Beast right now. He understood, and nodded.

I turned to the president. "I think, we can proceed with the asian tours. But, I have a small request, president-nim."

He opened his palms. "Lay it out on the table, Leader."

"After every country, can we fly back to Korea, before continuing to the next country? It will be like a break. That way, Gi Kwang can check in on his wife."

President-nim placed his hand on his chin and turned thoughtful. "Hmm... That's going to increase our budget."

"I'll help contribute to the budget, president-nim," Gi Kwang quickly said. "Please. My wife really needs me close to her."

President-nim nodded. "Arasso, arasso. We'll go with this plan."

"Kamsahamida, president-nim," Both me and Gi Kwang said.

•Gi Kwang•

When we arrived at the hospital after seeing president-nim, the kids were all standing at the corner of Lia's room like outsiders, while Jay and the gang surrounded Lia on her bed. They were talking and laughing, oblivious to the miserable Beast. I was jealous, because Michael was sitting in front of her, the place where I wanted to be. And Lia was smiling. A smile so warm, my jealousy deepened. She was all casual and comfortable with them. Unlike when she was with us.

"It's late," Ashley said.

Jay hyung looked at his watch. "Yeah, it's late. We better get going." He turned to Lia and gave her a hug. "Stay strong, princess. Keep moving that long, y legs of yours. I'll be waiting for you to come back to the crew."

She puffed out a breath. "I don't think I can ever come back."

He leaned in and kissed her cheek. "You will. You're the strongest princess I know. I believe in you."

One by one, they hugged her and said goodbye. Michael gave her a long lingering kiss on the cheek. I almost grabbed him by the neck and shoved him out of the room. But, I controlled myself. I knew Lia wouldn't have approve.

At the door, Jay hyung was waiting for the others as they said their final goodbye to Lia. I went to him. He continued to gaze at her even though he knew I wanted to talk to him. Lia was teasing a red face Jace about his dimples.

"Lia looks like she's alright, doesn't she? She's smiling and laughing and all," Jay hyung murmured.

I looked at her. She was laughing together with the others.

Hyung sighed. "She's not alright, Gi Kwang-ah. Princess's bottling up her grief. She looks fine on the outside, but her insides are empty. Finding out about her twin's death isn't going easy for her. She tried not to show it, but I know her well. I see through her."

"She's barely keeping it together," I agreed. Then I turned to him. "Which is why I need to ask you this favor, hyung."

He looked at me then, asking me silently.

I sighed. "Beast is leaving for an asian tour soon. We tried to put it off as long as possible but the company won't wait anymore."

"You want me to take care of Lia while you're gone?"

 I nodded.

"That's not a favor, Gi Kwang. It's my and the others responsibility to take care of Lia. We're not going to allow her to go through this all on her own again. Never."

After they left, then did we went to Lia. She smiled at us tentatively. A different smile from just now.

"Have you remembered anything new?" Dongwoon asked her.

She nodded, and my hopes went up. I shouldn't have my hopes up, but I couldn't help it!

 "I remembered two kittens," Lia said carefully. "I don't know if that helps. Or if it had anything to do with you guys."

Yoseob nodded. "You and Gi Kwang have two kittens."

She looked at me, her eyes lit up. "We have?"

 I nodded.

"What are their names?"

"Garfield and Kwangie."

She frowned. "Why did we give them that name?"

I explained and her frown deepened.

"Why do you call me Garfield?" She asked.

 "Uh." I glanced at the kids and saw them looking at me. They wanted to know too. "Erm, that's between us. The kids can't know. I'll tell you once we're alone."

She cocked her head to the side but didn't ask any further.

Doojoon placed his hands together. "I think we should leave now. It's getting late."

"I'm not going home today," I told.

He nodded, everyone nodded actually. They knew I wanted to spend the night with Lia alone.

When they'd left, I looked at Lia and she looked at me. There was an awkward silence, where we just stared at each other. This was the first time ever we were left alone since she woke up two weeks ago. For the past nights, we never got to be together alone because Lia would either fall asleep before the people who visited her went home or Keomonim would spend the night with Lia.

I cleared my throat and sat on the chair closest to Lia's bed. She adjusted her sitting position before facing me again.

"I have a lot of questions for you," She suddenly said.

I sat up straighter. "Ask away."

"First things first, why do you call me Garfield?"

I couldn't help but chuckle, remembering the time when I found her Garfield bra.
  She scowled. "Why are you laughing?"
  I told her the story and she blushed. I laughed again.
  "Stop laughing! It's not funny."
  "It is."
  "Jerk," she muttered. "How could I ever fall for you?"
  That kind of stung, and I stopped smiling altogether. She caught the hurt look in my eyes and immediately felt guilty.
  "I didn't mean that," she quickly said.
  I looked away.
  "I'm sorry. I really am sorry. I didn't mean what I said. Will you forgive me?"
  I sighed, and nodded. Then I changed the subject. "You said you have a lot of questions?"
  She didn't look convinced that I had forgiven her, but she didn't say anything about it. "How did we fall in love?"
  I thought about it for a moment. "I'm not sure. For me, I've fallen for you since the first time I laid eyes on you. But I didn't want to admit it to myself, because I was angry at you for accepting the marriage. The anger over shadowed the feelings I have for you. But as time passed, I stopped being angry at you and couldn't deny the feelings anymore."
  "What about me? How did I fall for you?"
  I shrugged. "I don't know. I could only guess. I think it was because you were lonely, and I was the only person around. I might have helped ease your ache of your brother's death."
  "I don't understand."
  I told her about the episodes she would always have on the twentieth of every month. And how I pulled her out of that dark place everytime. She fell silent and turned thoughtful. I let her processed them.
  Then she looked at me with an embarrassed expression. "I want to know if we had— have we— did we—" she stopped and bit her lower lip, her cheeks turning a delicate pink.

She looked so cute embarassed that I wanted to kiss her so badly. But I couldn't. It took everything I got to hold back. It was like having your favorite ice cream right in front of you, but you couldn't eat it.

"You want to know if we've had ?"

The blush went full blast. I remembered those nights we were together. It was the best nights I'd ever had. I wouldn't exchange that for anything.

I looked at her and my heart felt so heavy. "The accident killed our one month old fetus."

Her eyes widened and she held her stomach. "So—so, we've done it?" She looked down at her stomach. "I lost the baby?"

"Our baby," I whispered. She stared down at her stomach for a long moment, both her hands touching it tentatively. I reached out slowly and covered her hands in mine.

She groaned suddenly. "I can't even remember how I lost my ity. How stupid is this?" She looked at me at the corner of her eye. "When did we...?"

I stared at her, appalled. "You want to know when we did it? You want to know when was our first? Or our second? Or the third? Ohh the fourth was wild! Or maybe the Fifth? Sixth we tried to—"

"Ya, ya, ya!!! That's too much information!" She was blushing so much, her face was as red as a fresh tomato. "Who remembers all that?"

"I remember! The times I spent with you are all precious to me."

She looked at me. And the look on her face, I didn't know how to interpret that.

"I only want to know how and when did the first time happened."

I shrugged. "It was the night you came back to me. It just happened, you know? You were unpacking your stuff, and I was helping you. Halfway through, we started kissing and, it just happened."

She turned thoughtful again. "I must have really loved you." Her hands went to her stomach again and her voice shook when she whispered, "Even though I can't remember, I feel sad that I lost the baby. It didn't get a chance to see the world."

My heart hurt and I got up to sit in front of her. I pulled her into my arms. Her forehead leaned against my chest.

"It's okay, Love. I'm sad that we lost the baby too. But, I'm grateful that I lost the baby instead, and not you."

She took in a deep breath and started to pull away from me. My arms tigthened around her on reflex.

"Don't," I whispered. "Don't. Please don't. I almost lost you. I waited forever to hold you like this again. Please don't let this be brief. I need this. I need you."

She stopped, and remained in my arms. I took that as a good sign and moved closer, embracing her fully, burying my face on her shoulder. The familiarity of her body against mine made me realize how much I missed her. I missed her so much, I started crying. A minute later, I felt her arms around me.

She rubbed my back in a soothing gesture and said, "I don't know why, but I feel like I have to do this. My hand just have to do this."

"You always did that when you held me when I was upset," I sniffled.

"I'm sorry," She whispered suddenly.

 "What for?"

"For hurting you. I don't want to hurt you. Or Beast."

I pulled back and looked at her. She smiled a little and wiped my tears away.

"You don't remember me. You don't remember knowing me, but you still care about me. Why?" I asked.

"If your baby had been growing in me, you must have meant a lot to me. I want to remember that. I don't want to just forget about you and then regret it later on. Or keep wondering what will happen if I had remember you. I don't want to throw away someone that must have meant a lot to me just because I can't remember."

I wanted to kiss her then. I didn't care that she didn't remember me. That she might think that it was too early for this. That she wasn't ready. I really wanted to kiss her then.

Even though I wanted to kiss her so bad, I didn't want to destroy the way we were right now, the relationship we had. So I leaned to her slowly, my eyes flickered from her lips to her eyes and back again. If she wasn't ready, she could push me away, and I would stop. I waited for the push, the harsh rejection, but it never came. My heartbeat sped up. I came closer and closer. Our lips were just a millimeter apart now. I could feel her breath on my lips, and I was sure she could feel mine. She leaned in a very little more, and our lips grazed each others so very lightly. It felt like breeze grazing your skin.

My phone rang.

Lia looked away. Squeezing my eyes shut, I clenched my jaw in frustration. I wanted to scream, but I held back.

>Lia<

We almost kissed. We. Almost. Kissed.

 I didn't know why that freaked me out. I wasn't the type that would kiss any random guy. Well, maybe during a party. But I wouldn't ever kiss someone when I was sober unless I wanted to get serious with him. I didn't even know if I wanted to get serious with Lee Gi Kwang. What I said just now, was the truth. I meant what I said. I wanted to remember him. He was the first ever guy I had fallen in love with—or so he said— I wanted to remember why. I even carried his baby! He must have been a very, very special someone to me. I wanted to remember him. I really wanted to remember him before I could be with him.
  Lee Gi Kwang hung up the phone and looked at me.
  "I have something to tell you," he said.
  I cleared my throat softly. "What's that?"
  He sat on the chair. "Next week, you won't see me as fequently as usual. Don't think it's because I'm neglecting you or I've given up on you. It's because Beast is going for an asian tour."
  "Oh. How long will you be gone?"
  "I'll be away for three to five days. Then I'll come back for maybe two to three days. And then I'll have to go away again."
  "Oh, okay."
  I felt... My heart... I felt down. That was all I could come up with what I was feeling when he told me about this. My brain was telling me: Okay, sure, he was going to be gone for a few days. No big deal. But my heart told me: He would be gone for that long? I wouldn't be able to see his face for that long?
  Great! Now my heart and my brain were not in sync. I was like two different people in one body.
  "Waeyo? Why are you scowling like that?" He asked me.
  I hesitated, then shrugged and told him. His eyes kind of shone after I finished.
  His hand reached out and tapped my forehead with a finger. "Your brain doesn't remember me." Then his finger tapped my chest gently. "But your heart recognize me." He smiled. "I like your heart. I don't like your brain."
  "I like you." It slipped out of my mouth without me thinking. I frowned.
  Lee Gi Kwang stared at me wide-eyed, a little stunned.
  "Those words you said, sounded familiar. What I said— it slipped out of my mouth," I admitted guiltily.
  "But do you remember anything?"
  I frowned. "No."
  He looked away. "I used to always say that to you; I like your heart, I don't like your brain. You'd reply by saying you like me. And then I would say I love you."
  I tried to recall, but the memory wouldn't come back. I only remembered those words.
  "I remembered those words. I just couldn't remember when we said it."
  "We said it all the time."
  I looked down. I hated my brain too. Why couldn't I remember?
  Lee Gi Kwang sat in front of me again. Then to my surprise, he kissed me on the cheek. His lip was soft on my skin.
  "It's okay, Love. It'll come back to you soon."
  I didn't say anything, because I didn't think my memories would come back at all.