>Lia<

Every morning, without fail, Gi Kwang-goon and I would fight for the coffee maker. We would race for it from our rooms. If he reached it first, I would annoy him by yelling my lungs out that Gi Kwang-goon was a pyeontae. He would have his revenge by taking his own sweet time. If I reached it first, he would try to push me away. Once, I had to plug out the coffee maker and kidnapped it to my room. He called me a cheater.

Every night, literally, we would fight for the remote control. Sometimes I won. Most times, he won. I wanted to buy a new television for myself, but for some "important reason", according to that coffee stealer pyeontae, I couldn't.

On 20th November, fourth monthsary of Lucas's death, I wasn't looking forward to anything. I purposely woke up late so that I wouldn't bump into Gi Kwang-goon. I didn't pay any attention at work, and went home early.

At home, I cooked a simple meal for Beast and refused to join them for dinner. Claiming that I'd already eaten.

My mind was playing back what happened that day. On 20th July, from the time I woke up until 11.39pm. I locked myself in my room, suffocating myself with my own guilt and misery. This would happen on the 20th of every month. I couldn't help it. My body would remind me on its own. That it was the monthsary of Lucas death. I couldn't run away from it.

At 10.18pm that night, I found myself in the living room. Holding on to the remote control with the television on. Gi Kwang-goon wasn't around. And I had no idea how I got there. Just when I broke through the surface of reality, memories me back in. And the grip that I had on reality slipped out of my hands.

•Gi Kwang•

"What's wrong with Lia today?" I kind of jumped when Hyun Seung echoed my thoughts. "She has that look. The blank look when we first met her, remember?"

Dongwoon's face was troubled. "When I looked into her eyes... aah, how do I say this? They looked... empty. Like Lia wasn't in there. What's wrong with her? I'm worried."

"Me too," Doojoon murmured. "She didn't join us for dinner."

"Yoseob-ah, do you know why? You're her best Chingu, aren't you? Did she tell you anything?" Junhyung turned to Yoseob.

Yoseob looked more distressed than supposed to. I was her husband. I was supposed to look that worried. Not him.

"Na molla," he said, his voice pained. "She didn't reply my text, or talk to me at all. When I pulled her aside just now, I don't think she even realized that I was talking to her."

"Gi Kwang-ah, aren't you worried about her?" Hyun Seung asked me suddenly.

I yawned. "There's no need for that. I'm sure she'll be fine tomorrow."

"Why are you being so heartless?" Yoseob snapped at me.

I turned my head to look at him lazily. "Don't waste your time and energy worrying about that Garfield. If she really needs help, she'll come to us."

I could see that Yoseob didn't agree with me, but before he could bite my neck off, I stood up and stretched.

"I'm turning in early. Aaahh, I'm so tired."

I walked out of my old apartment and went to my new apartment, just next door. When I opened the door, I saw Garfield sitting on the sofa, watching tv. Oh, she was holding onto the remote. He he he...

I jumped onto the seat beside her and snatched away the remote. I waited for the curse that would definitely come out of , but strangely, she didn't make a sound. She didn't even look at me. I gazed at her closely. Her eyes were on the tv screen, but I knew she was far away from here. The look in her eyes, the emptiness— I didn't like it. It was scaring me. It made me feel like she was going far away from me, that I was losing her.

I snapped my fingers in front of her eyes. "Ya, ya, Garfield. Garfield!"

My heart was beating wildly in my chest, waiting for her to come back to me. Come back, Lia-ah.

She finally blinked, once, twice. And then she turned to look at me.

>Lia<

I was running, running. My pulse was racing, adrenaline washed through me. Lucas and the others were right behind me, pushing me forward. My hands were shaking. Even though I knew I had weapons with me, but still. I was afraid.

"This way, Lia." Lucas grabbed my hand and we turned to the right. It was the wrong choice, because we were ambushed from the front.

This was it, I thought. This was where everything ended.

They attacked us, knives and bats everywhere. I couldn't think. All I knew was to kill and get out of here alive.

I could feel Lucas at my back.

It's coming. It's coming, oh god.

My heart hurt. I couldn't breathe.

"Ya, ya, Garfield. Garfield!"

My mind was slow to catch up.

What? Garfield? Huh?

It was like his voice was the cold water that splashed my face. I blinked once, twice. The brightness of the tv screen hurt my eyes. I felt someone beside me, and turned to see who it was. Gi Kwang-goon.

•Gi Kwang•

She stared at me for a moment. She took a huge breath and sighed. "I don't want to fight with you tonight, Gi Kwang."

I knew something was wrong because she didn't add the goon.

I stared deep into her eyes, trying to find something. "What is wrong with you?" I asked.

She smiled, but it wasn't right. "Nothing's wrong."

I didn't want her to go back to that dark, empty, scary place. I didn't think I would get her back.

"You can have the remote tonight," I said, giving her the remote.

She shook her head. "Gweanchana. You can watch what you want to watch." She turned back to stare at the tv screen, and I saw the blank look was coming back. I panicked.

Jumping to my feet, I grabbed her hand and pulled her up with me. She jolted back to reality.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

I dragged her to the apartment's balcony. Fresh air should do the trick. But I was scared that it wouldn't be enough, so I faced her.

She frowned at me. "Gi Kwang-ah. Are you out of your mind?"

I placed my hand lightly on her waist and pulled her to me. Her eyes widened in surprise. I took her hand and guided it to my shoulder. The other hand I gripped it tight. And then I started swaying.

She stared at me, eyes wide.

I smiled at her. "Do you know what this dance is called?"

She didn't answer, just stared at me.

"Slow dancing."

I swayed her slowly. She let me lead, trusting me. I liked that. Her body wasn't stiff which made me wonder if she dance.

After a few sways— it wasn't awkward at all. It felt right— she finally found her voice.

"Gi Kwang-goon, why are you suddenly like this?"

I stared into her eyes. "I don't like it. I don't like what you were doing the whole day. It scared me."

"What do you mean?" Her voice was shaking.

I didn't know how to explain, so I changed the topic. "Do you know that I'm the main dancer in Beast?"

She was startled with the change of topic, but she didn't look like she minded.

"Really? Why's that?"

"Because I'm the best dancer, of course."

She rolled her eyes, but I could see the smile she was suppressing,

That was the Lia I was looking for.

Then she turned serious.

"Why do you hate me?"

The dance halted for just a second before I swayed us again. I realized then, that I didn't hate her anymore.

"I don't hate you," I said. "Would I dance with you like this if I hated you?"

"But you used to hate me."

"Not anymore."

"Then why do you always make my life miserable? Why do you always bully me?" She said it matter-of-factly.

I shrugged. "Just. It's fun."

"Mwo?"

I chuckled. "I like bullying you because you make me laugh."

She turned thoughtful. "So what are we now?"

The dance paused for the second time that night. When I started swaying again, I already had the answer.

"We're friends."

She looked into my eyes and smiled for real for the first time that day. My breath caught in my throat.

"We're friends," she repeated.

>Lia<

"Do you dance?" Gi Kwang-goon asked.

Dance. Lucas loved dancing. He would force me to dance with him...

Gi Kwang-goon twirled us twice, bringing me back to the here and now. I shook my head a little.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"Do you dance?"

I gazed over at the night sky. "I used to."

He frowned a little. "Used to?"

"I don't dance. Not anymore."

He cocked his head to the side. "Waeyo?"

I shrugged. "Just because."

We fell silent for a moment. I felt him staring at my face but I couldn't bring myself to look back at him.

"What happened today? Why were you like that?" He whispered. The fear in his voice startled me into looking at him. He looked worried.

I took a deep breath. "I had a bad memory."

I could see he didn't understand.

"Something bad happened four months ago."

"Happened to you?"

I nodded.

"Will you tell me what that is?" He watched my face.

I shook my head. "I'm not ready to say it out."

"That's okay. I understand," He paused. "It must be something big, for you to have traumas like that."

"It was," I whispered and sighed. "Will you keep me company tonight?"

He looked surprised.

"I don't need you to listen to me talking all night long. I just don't want to be alone. You only need to be beside me. That's all I'm asking."

His brown eyes softened. "Okay. I'll be right beside you tonight. You won't be alone."

"Thank you."

So that night, we stretched out on the sofa. I decided that him, sleeping beside me in bed would be crossing the friend's line. The sofa was too small for two, and I realized that this might be worse that sleeping together in bed. But Gi Kwang-goon was all casual about it. He lied down and pulled me down with him, tugging my head to his chest. Both hands wrapped around me so that I wouldn't fall. Since there wasn't anywhere else to place my hands, I carefully placed them on him.

This was such a different Gi Kwang-goon that I knew. The Gi Kwang-goon I knew was rough, harsh and evil. This, this Gi Kwang-goon, was nice, soft, gentle and kind.

"Are you really Gi Kwang-goon?" I whispered into his chest.

"Of course, I'm your Gi Kwang-goon." I heard the smile in his voice.

"But you're so different."

"It's because you're so vulnerable tonight. I feel like I need to protect you." He caressed my hair in a soothing gesture. It was making me sleepy. I yawned.

He chuckled. "Sleep, Lia-ah. Have a nice rest."

"Sing me a lullaby," I mumbled.

"What do you want me to sing?"

"Anything." I sighed.

"Hmm. I'll sing you a song from my first solo album. It's called Wipe Your Tears."

And then he started singing. His voice soaked through me to my heart. It felt as if he was caressing my wounded heart, warming it, making it whole again. Healing the wounds. I felt so content that I fell into a deep dreamless sleep.