As I open my eyes I already inside the ambulance and the paramedic busy to check my condition. To see me gain my senses back relief them a bit, there also my mother who together inside the vehicle.

“Ji Hyo-ah what had happen?”

“Jong Kook Oppa… Jagiya…” only that I able to answer and the tears run out from my eyes.

“What happen to him?” clueless she ask but can’t I able to said anything. I just burst a cry along my journey to the hospital while my mother holds to my hand try to coax me.

“You need to be warded, you have a low blood pressure. It’s not good for the baby” the Doctor said after finished his check-up.

“Baby? Did I pregnant?”

“When did your last period?”

“I think last 3 month, but Doctor I’ve an inconsistent period”

“Through the urine test earlier it’s confirm you’re pregnant. From your last period might be it’s around 3 months now. For an accurate result we will wait your blood test. Congratulation. By the way, didn’t you have any discomfort, like dizziness or vomit?”

“I didn’t but my husband… he always complaint he got dizzy”

“Oh yeah… where is your husband? We should share this good news to him too”

“He is…” and without expectation my tears fall again. It’s so hurt to thinks of it, he already leaves me… suddenly he just disappeared from my life. I can’t see his face anymore, I can’t hear his voice anymore, I can’t touch him anymore… His face, his voice, his act, his laugh… all of him lingering into my mind. ‘Jagiya, why you leave me… please come back to me’

“Don’t stress yourself, it’s not good for your baby. We will prepare your ward, take care of your health and have a good rest”

*****

“Ji Hyo-ah what happen?” my mother keep on asking even when I already inside my ward. Not that I didn’t want to tell her but thinking of him make me sad. It’s so sudden… suddenly I had become a widow, no a single mother. Can I survived in this world alone without him and raise our child by myself. I feel the world so cruel towards me… why God give this burden on me?

Without him by my side I’m just like a frozen flower. All the happiness swept away leaves it together with him. One by one of our memory flashes into my mind.

“Ji Hyo-ah… Love…” I curve a smile towards our happy memory and his voice calls my name.

“Ha…ha…ha…ha….”  I laugh when I remember his cute act and funny gesture.

I blush thinking of our intimate time together…. His kiss, his hug, our bonding… “I Love you Ji Hyo-ah”

But it all splash like a broken mirror and end up with my cry. I don’t give a damn if people would think I’m insane, I didn’t care if my mother didn’t acknowledge me as her daughter anymore… I wanna follow him… I rather die than live without him. Without ashamed my mouth keeps calling his name.

Sud