CHAPTER 8: BIRTHDAY HEARTACHE
Love
CHAPTER 8 BIRTHDAY HEARTACHE
SURPRISE!!!!!
I got shocked and almost curse when I saw everyone in my apartment. Managers with the assistant managers, of course Bigbang members and Nikki. I know she wanted to cheer me up but....
My thoughts stops, my apartment is decorated for the occasion, pink and white balloons are everywhere, some are hanging in every corner of the house while the others are scattered on the floor. In the table is a 6 layered cake. Dejavu? Bull! I fake a smile and thanked everyone for coming, I suddenly feel nauseous my heart is about to leap out of my chest . I want to pop all the balloons, I want them to be gone. I want to shout and ask everyone to leave.
"Happy Birthday cousin." Nikki run towards me, I want to slap and curse her but she didn't do anything wrong.
"Thank you."
"I know you don't want to celebrate but I want you to be happy." She smiles. Happy?
The managers greet me, giving me gifts. Asking me where I go and who am I with, it turns out they see me and Marcus in the park earlier. Sometimes I really wonder if they are just managers or paparazzi.
"Here." Nikki hands me my phone. "Sasha keeps on calling you."
"Sasha." I said.
"Damn it! Where have you been?"
"Jogging."
"Jogging?"
"Yup."
"Anyway I keep calling you because I found out what Nikki is planning to do."
"I got shocked, everyone are here."
"Everyone?" She said in shocked.
"Yup" I said. "I have to go, i'll call you later."
"Gian." She said. "Are you okay?"
"Yes!" I lied.
"Don't be sad okay?"
"I won't. Bye." I hang up the phone then went straight to the kitchen to drink water.
"I thought you're not coming home." Nikki followed me in the kitchen.
"I'm planning not to go home." I answered back then there's a ping coming from the door.
"My surprise for you, they're here." She smiles at me then run towards the door. My parents, I got surprise and shocked, why are they here? Both of them are all smiles while walking where I stand.
"Mommy. Daddy." I said.
"Happy Birthday Darling." My mom said, she hug me tightly not wanting to let me go.
"Thank you."
"Happy Birthday baby." My daddy hug me next.
"Thank you but what are you doing here?"
"Its your birthday and we haven't seen you for months."
"I'm fine, you don't have to come here."
"They miss you." Nikki butted in. "By the way uncle, auntie meet our co-workers." She introduce them to the managers.
"Nice to meet all of you." My mom smiles at them.
"And they are the Bigbang members." Nikki said again. "Youngbae, Daesung, Suengri, Jiyong and Tabi."
"Anyway I cook something for all of you." My mom said. "I cook my daughter's favorite dishes."
"We can't wait, were starving." Youngbae smiles.
"Just give me time to prepare."
"Uncle, why don't you join the boys in the living room." Nikki look at my dad.
"Sure."
"I'll just take a shower." I said to my mom who is busy preparing the food. "Mom, When did you and Dad arrive?"
"This morning. Go now take a shower, we will eat in no time."
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I'm about to go out of my room when there's a knock on my bedroom door, when I open Daesung is standing smiling shyly to me, both his hands are behind his back.
"Noona." He said. "Happy Birthday."
"Thank you." I smile.
"Here. I hope you like it." He hands me a small gift.
"Thank you." I said again. "Can I open it now?" He nods. I unwrap the gift and found a small box it contains a necklace with a pendant that says 'happiness'. "Its beautiful."
"Thank God you like it."
"I'll wear it now." I said and put it around my neck.
"Noona." He said again. "Can I hug you?"
"Of course." I said smiling and stretching my arms wide open. He walk towards me and hug me tightly.
"I miss you noona." He quietly say. "I really do."
"Why the hell do you miss her?" Both me and Daesung startles. It's Nikki.
"Noona is always with maknae, I haven't had the chance to spend time with her." He whines.
"So cheesy." Nikki scoffs. "The food is ready."
While walking back to the kitchen area I hear my Dad and the boys talking animatedly, laughing their asses off. I even hear him whine because we can't all fit in the dining table, I don't need a table that can sit 10-15 people at once. I'm not panning to stay in this country for a long time. I sit beside my Mom in the bar stool while the others just stay in the living room.
"Umma, i'm hungry." Suengri says.
"Umma? Nikki look at him.
"Why? Am I not allowed to call someone else's mom UMMA?"
"Weird."
"I can call you umma right?" He ask my mom with eyes twinkling. He smiles widely when my Mom nods. "See." He smirks at Nikki.
"Jerk!" She murmurs. Then there's another knock on the door, I look at Nikki asking silently if she invites more people in my apartment. "Are you expecting someone?" She looks at me and I shake my head.
"Who did you invite?" I ask.
"Everyone I invited are here already." She said. Boram oppa opens the door when he comes back he's holding a familiar box. I scoff and grab my phone excusing myself to everyone then went to the balcony.
"Yah! I told you I don't like creps." I said in a serious tone.
"Just try it." It's Kangin. "Happy Birthday." He chuckles.
"I'm going to throw the whole box in the trash can."
"I told you just try it, I bought one flavor of each."
"Eat it yourself." I really hate it not because I don't like it but it reminds me of Love.
"Please!" He pleads. "Sorry I won't be able to celebrate your birthday with you."
"Its fine my parents are here."
"Good! I will see you in two weeks."
"Okay. Thank you for the creps."
"Welcome."
"Bye."
"Creps?" Youngbae ask when I went back inside and I nod.
"Can we eat it?" Daesung ask and I nod again. "Noona, there's a card and a gift inside the box." I grab it, opening while sitting beside my Mom. Its a ring with 'I love you' engrave inside. I read the card, I just smile and shake my head.
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The dinner is already done everyone are gone, its just me and my parents. My mind is still with Marcus, is he okay right now? Is he thinking about her? I tap my fingers in the counter top, my Mom is busy cleaning the kitchen while my Dad is busy watching TV while drinking his coffee.
"Mom do we still have pasta and tiramisu left?"
"Yes. Don't tell me you're hungry again."
"Can you pack some for me?"
"Where are you going?" My Dad half shouts.
"To my friend's house, i'll be quick. Its also his birthday today." I quickly change my clothes and grab the food then leave.
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"Why are you here? Its late." Marcus said, I glance at my watch its only 11 in the evening.
"Happy Birthday." I smile and show him the food.
"What's that?"
"Food. My parents arrive this morning."
"Come in."
"Its also my birthday today." I said.
"Really?" He smiles. "Happy Birthday! I hope Birthday is just the only common thing we have."
"Thank you." I smile.
"Why didn't you say earlier?"
"I forgot." I just said.
We shared the food my Mom made, the mood is light and happy unlike earlier. We laugh, talking about this and that I think I should be like him, he let's go the past and moving towards what's in store for him in the future but for me I think I should know the answers to the questions that looms in my head. I have to accept the fact that i'm heading for the future all by myself. That he's not by my side anymore, I hope I can handle it.
"You have to go home, your parents are waiting for you." He said as I gulp the soju in my glass.
"Its only 1 in the morning." I said.
"I know but for sure your parents will worry." He said dragging me out from his unit while i'm busy eating. We stop in front of the elevator.
"I'll bring you home."
"No need I will just take a cab."
"Are you sure?"
"Yup!" I nod. "I forgot my bag inside."
"I'll get it for you."
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TOP'S POV
Me with the boys and Scarlet are in the elevator going to our dorm, after the dinner we had, all of us went to YGE for the rehearsal then I told Scarlet to wait for us at the apartment's parking lot. I just want to spend time with her. Next week we will go to Manila, while she will go to Malaysia and Taiwan for a photo shoot, both of us will be busy plus the fact that this past few weeks is a little confusing for me.
"Hyung what are you doing?" Maknae whines, it turns out that Jiyong presses all the buttons so the elevator stops at every floor.
"Are you saying something?" Jiyong holds maknae's collar, smiling mischievously.
"Nothing." The elevator door opens again and my heart stops when I saw her.
"Unnie." Scarlet shouts. "Wait." She look at us. "I'll just greet her." She went outside of the lift and walk towards her. "Unnie Happy Birthday."
"Thank you."
"Nikki unnie told me that its your birthday today. She invited me to your surprise party but I have work." She said. "What are you doing here? Suengri said you're in your apartment with your parents."
"I just went here to see a friend of mine."
"Is that your friend?" Scarlet point at someone, the five of us look at one particular direction and my blood boils in an instant.
"Is he your boyfriend unnie?"
"No!"
"You look good together." Scarlet giggles.
"Don't worry I will ask her out one day." The guy smiles, I don't know but I have this urge to punch him.
"Baby let's go." I suddenly blurted out but the problem is when I say those words i'm not looking at Scarlet.
"Unnie I have to go." She bow at the both of them. "Bye." My emotions are still rolling, i'm mad, really mad. Seeing her with another guy is making me crazy. Am I jealous?
"Hyung stop playing with the elevator buttons." I heard maknae whines.
"Mind your own business maknae" Jiyong said.
"When you say Baby let's go who are you really talking to, me or unnie?" Scarlet suddenly said. Everyone of us turn to her direction.
"Of course i'm reffering to you." I said, she just look at me then laugh.
"I know baby, i'm just messing with you."
"This girlfriend of yours is nuts." Youngbae shakes his head.
"I'm just fooling around but all of you have to agree with me, they look good together."
"What are you saying? Maknae half shouts. "Noona can't be with other guys. PERIOD!" He stomped towards our dorm when the elevator door opens.
"I'm not feeling well baby." I whisper and hold Scarlet's hand, when everyone went out I press the B button.
"Hyung where are you going?"
"Scarlet will go home." I said as the door slide closes.
"Why?" Scarlet look at me.
"I suddenly become nauseous." I lied. "I'll just go to your place tomorrow.
"Are you okay baby?"
"Yes! I just need to rest." I lied again.
I ushered her to the car, assuring her that I just need some rest and promising her that we will see each other tomorrow. As I wait for the elevator I remember again what happen earlier, the second I see her it feels like heaven, as if i'm breathing fresh air but as soon as I saw the guy everything went black for me. Why is she with him?
"Birthday boy?" Someone bring my senses back. A girl walking towards me. Its not my birthday today right?
"Hey!" Another voice entered my senses, this time its a man's voice. I turn around and its him.
"Happy Birthday." The girls said. They're behind me and I hear everything they've talked about.
"Thank you."
"I'm going to a bar to drink, want to come?"
"Some other time, i'm tired."
"What did you do all day?"
"I just went jogging with Gian." He replied.
"Girlfriend?"
"No comment." I hear him chuckles, I want to turn to his direction and give him a death glare then maybe punch him repeatedly.
"Is that all?" I hear her chuckles as well. If he says something else for sure i'm going to lose it.
"What do you want to know?" I hear him scoff. "Mind your own relationship."
"I'm just curious." The girl laughs. "Let's drink tomorrow."
"Sure, i'll bring her with me, you have to treat us, we have the same birthday."
"Wow! Match made in heaven." Match made in heaven my . "See you tomorrow."
I didn't realized that I enter the elevator and arrive at the 20th floor, i'm not in the mod for anything. When I enter our dorm I found the four guys in the living room, they just look at me as if they don't know me. I went straight to my room and throw my bag carelessly somewhere, I went out again to grab a bottle of red wine and a wine glass then lock myself in my room. I'm ing jealous that's for sure, I won't deny it anymore.
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All the lights are turned off except from the candles that lit up on top of a birthday cake, he sings quietly for his past lover, for his ex fiancee, for the love of his life that he abandon. Happy Birthday Love. We should be celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary today. We should be traveling by now or having a nice dinner together with our kids. It should be a happy ending but that day fear suddenly engulf me. I'm sorry if you waited for me at the altar on the day we waited for, i'm sorry if I just disappear without a word. He chuckle bitterly, blowing one of the candles.
Love, will you forgive me if I explain everything? Will you accept my apologies? Love, I miss you badly. I miss everything about you but I just throw away what we have, I just wish that I can turn back time. He sobs and blow another candle. I choose a life without you, i'm not ready to settle down. I'm sorry, I really do. He blow the last 4 candles and wipe the tears streaming down his face. The whole place is dead quiet, all he can hear is his own breathing and sobbing. He keeps asking his self what made him to that, what made him decide not to appear on the most important day of His and Gian's life.
FLASHBACK
"What?" His Mom shouts while his Dad and friends are shocked. "What do you mean?"
"I'm not ready to settle down and get married." He said quietly.
"Your wife is in the bridal car, everyone is waiting for us." His Dad said.
"I'm sorry but i'm not really ready."
"If you're not ready why the hell you ask her to marry you?" His best friend and best man ask.
"I don't know." He just shake his head. "Mom, Dad just go back to the hotel."
"Do you know what Gian might feel if you won't show up?" His Mom is about to burst. "What's happening to you?"
"I know she will hate me. Just leave me here."
Both his parents are long gone but his friends stay with him, He just look at his ex fiancee sitting in front of the altar, where they should be saying their I do's. One by one the guests are starting to leave, He just stay there emotionless like the girl wearing the wedding gown, he doesn't know what happen to him but as the day approach he feels less excited but more nervous. He keeps asking his self if he really loves the girl and the answer is always yes. She's the love of his life, she's his everything but it all boils down to does he love her to the point that he wants to marry her?
"Gian already left, what are we still doing here?" His best friend ask him.
"2 more minutes." He replied. "2 more minutes then i'm going to forget her."
"Sasha keeps calling you on your phone."
"Turn it off." He said. He takes a deep breath, saying his final goodbye silently. "Let's go."
END OF FLASHBACK
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He grab a small black box in the safe and open it, the wedding ring he kept for years. Staring at it for a long period of time. Gian i'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to hurt you and your family. The burden i'm carrying all these years are killing me. I don't have the guts to talk to you but believe me my heart aches every time I remember you and what we have. He stops when someone knocks the door.
"Dinner is ready." He heard a woman's voice. He wipe the tears in his eyes and put the ring back in the safe then just lie down on the bed waiting for himself to calm down.
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