Angry Over A Thing

Arranged Marriage To.....

"Do you know why I look up to you?" Eun Joo's grip on Dong Ho's hand tightened. Eun Joo knew she was asking pointless questions. Questions that Dong Ho won't answer, maybe because he was angry or simply sleeping. Regardless, Eun Joo continued to talk.

"I look up to you because you're everything I'm not. Because you're everything I want to be." Dong Ho closed his eyes completely, trying to comprehend what Eun Joo was saying. "You live, being able to do whatever you like. You can fight for your own happiness. More importantly..."

Eun Joo brushed Dong Ho's bangs aside again and her grip on Dong Ho's hand softened. She put her head on the soft hospital bed seemingly hesitating about whether or not she should finish her sentence. 

"More... more importantly.." Eun Joo bit her lip and took a deep breath. "You're a human. Inside and out. But when people look at me, they see a puppet. They don't say anything, but I know what they think. I'm useless in this world. I can't even compare to a puppet or a doll. At least they can make people happy. But me? I serve no purpose. I'm just a figurehead. I'm just another thing to take up space in this world."

The room became completely silent as Dong Ho could no longer feel the warmth of Eun Joo's hand. Eun Joo stopped talking because of how tense muscles were. She was choking back her tears and didn't even realize it. Even though she didn't have watery eyes, she was already choking back tears.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Dong Ho. I have no right to be here. I have no right to talk to you. No right to touch a hair on you. I have no rights to see you." Eun Joo apologized, her left hand gripping her bag tightly. "Even though it seems as if we have nothing in common, there's something. To avoid misery. To live happily. We both want to get rid of the thing that's making our lives miserable. That's possible for you, but for me it's not. Because I'm the cause of misery. No matter how many times you yell at me, I will endure it. Because I owe you too much already. I know how much you despise me. For runing your life and causing the love of your life to leave. I don't have the courage to visit you during the day.. because I don't want to see you angry over me. Over a thing. Over a useless doll. This is why you should get better soon. So you can fight for your life back."

Eun Joo sat by Dong Ho's bed feeling a part of the heavy weight on her shoulders go away. She had apologized, but now she has to do it when he wakes up. One day. But that day wasn't today. She wasn't ready to. She didn't have enough courage to.

Getting up, she left the hospital room and closed the door quietly. As she did so, Dong Ho opened his eyes to stare at the empty space in which Eun Joo was, thinking about what she said.

Dammit. I said I wouldn't fall for it. But I fell for it. I feel guilty.

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AJ stood by the hospital entrance waiting for Eun Joo. He wore a mask that covered his nose and mouth, avoiding baseball caps or sunglasses because there was a pretty high chance of him being shoved into the back seat of a police car if he was dressed like that. As he saw Eun Joo walking past him dazed, AJ grabbed her wrist.

"Eun Joo!" AJ took his mask off so Eun Joo could see his face. 

"Hi AJ." Eun Joo gave him a polite smile. Trying not to be awkward, AJ cleared his throat. 

"Um... So do you want to go to a coffee shop to get some drinks?" AJ asked, putting his mask on again.

"Sure, but it seems pretty late to be drinking coffee doesn't it?" Eun Joo responded. AJ let out a laugh.

"I agree, but knowing you, you wouldn't go to  the convenience store to get a drink. The only shops that you would go to that are open this early ot "late" are coffee shops. We don't have to get coffee anyways. They have bottled drinks too." AJ took Eun Joo's hand and headed down the block to the coffee shop. As they made it to the front of the coffee shop, AJ realized his hand was wrapped around Eun Joo's. After realizing it, he let go of her hand quickly, causing Eun Joo to be surprised.

"Sorry." AJ gave her a weak smile and opened the door to the coffee shop. "Let's get a drink." As they entered, Eun Joo took a seat in the corner of the coffee shop so they wouldn't attract too much attention as AJ went to get the drinks. AJ came back with two bottles of water, handing one to Eun Joo.

"Thank you." Eun Joo sent AJ a small and polite smile.

"Just on thank you?" AJ sighed in false disappointment. "You know, Dong Ho was suspecting you as the person who visited him every night. But if it wasn't for me, he would've continued to suspect you."

"Well then I'll thank you again then. Thank you." Eun Joo replied, not touching her drink. "What are you doing by the hospital this late anyways? Were you planning on visiting Dong Ho as well?"

"I can't visit him at night. Hopefully he doesn't know it's the hospital rules. Because I'm not a part of his family, I can't visit him when it's not visiting hours." AJ opened his bottle of water. "But the real question here is, why do you never visit him during the day? It can get pretty lonely in the hospital for him sometimes. U-Kiss and I can't spend much time with him these days. His mom and dad have a lot on their plate too. So really, only you can keep him company."

"I don't have the courage to." Eun Joo admitted, breaking her eye contact with AJ. " I don't want him to get angry."

"Aren't you curious as to how he's doing?" AJ asked.

"The doctors and nurses are always available. I ask them." Eun Joo replied, making short eye contact with AJ.

"But don't you want to talk to him? Know what he's thinking? I'm not really talking about his health condition, but emotion wise." AJ explained.

"I don't have the right to." Eun Joo answered, looking down at her bag. "Dong Ho's life just gets worse as I get closer to him. I want to keep a distance from him. He's happier when I'm not around." Eun Joo looked at the clock on the wall behind the cake displays. "It's getting late. You should get some sleep. I'll take my leave first." Eun Joo got up quickly and nearly toppled over, holding onto the flimsy wooden table to keep her balance.

"Are you okay? Eun Joo?!" AJ took hold of her as Eun Joo leaned against him, fighting off the urge to faint. She softly pushed AJ away, walking like a drunk woman. 

"I'm fine." Eun Joo left AJ standing in the coffee shop, watching her leave.

I promised Dong Ho I wouldn't hurt him. But not hurting him will be harder than I thought. When Eun Joo is obviously hurting. No matter what happens in this relationship, someone will get hurt.

 

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*So another chapter in less than a week. Yay! But as for the poll, it surprised me to how many people voted in the poll this time! I had more voters for this poll than subscribers, which is good...? I guess. So Hoon got elimated because he got 4 votes.... :/ Anyways, a new poll is up! Keep guessing guys! It seems like Kevin has been in the lead the past two polls. And please check out my new story, 'How Long Will It Last?' Enjoy~*

http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/705724/how-long-will-it-last-dongho-kevin-romance-ukiss-ukissdongho-ukisskevin

 

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lunab92 #1
Chapter 49: Yay, I was right!!! I knew it was Hoon all along!!!! :)
Noobynoobster #2
Chapter 57: Hoorrrayyy! All the happiness is just overwhelming. How beautiful! Thank you, Author nim
YukiZeref #3
dongho? o.O
KillaGurl #4
Chapter 50: I knew it was Hoon! I mean the character fitted Hoon perfectly! Clumsy and mischievous. Though i did imagine someone as bothe Soohyun and Hoon. Cuz i thought they were the only possibility!
KillaGurl #5
Chapter 21: Seriously? I'm totally half grateful and half hating AJ for being Eun Joo here...i'm grateful bcuz wihtout him, dongho won't start to be closer with eun joo but i'm hating cuz Eun Joo is totally Dongho's..
Ukissgirllovesdongho
#6
Chapter 50: Do ya'll smell that???



IT'S LOVE IS IN THE AIR !!
KpopSweetart
#7
Chapter 49: You caught me for a second, but i knew it was hoon all along >:D ah so cute! <3
Adoree
#8
Chapter 49: Dayum. That was so good and surprising.
I love it.
Love how Eunjoo is changing.
Ukissgirllovesdongho
#9
Chapter 49: IT WAS HOON !!! i knew it !!
Ukissgirllovesdongho
#10
Chapter 48: AWWWWWW can i just say how cute dongho and Eun Joo relationship is becoming !