Saturday, June 13, 2015

A/N: This update…is simply a thank you for those who stayed with me throughout the journey and made that pretty star now next to my story possible. You guys know who you are and you’re the ones who made this possible and listened to all my rambling notes and such. I’ve missed you guys…have you missed me?

Small duffel bags of many colors were already lined up by the doorway. Some were getting rides. Others were taking public transit. And one was driving.

But before they had to go, Sunny wanted to play on her grab machine until she got a bobble from eight girls to take home with her for the holidays. They would keep her company and keep them close when their physical presences were not there with her. The girls took turns playing on it.

‘I love when you make me eggs for breakfast! Sunny’s sunnyside-up eggs are jjang!

~Love you Sunny-ah!

Sooyoungie’

‘Samson’s weakness was his hair and his love for unworthy women. You are our weakness but you are neither as fantastical as magical hair nor are you unworthy. But without you, we lose our strength. Our hidden pillar and my veiled support. My Samson. Sunny, thank-you.

~ Much love,

Tiffany’

‘Sun Buns! Every time I see the top of your head, I thank the good Lord above that I am just that much taller. But! You can definitely rock that cute apple-bun better than I ever could!

~Luv Yah Shortie!

Hyo choding’

‘Sunny! You are always so sensible and willing to get your hands dirty. To be the one to go all in for a friend or a loved one. And I love you for that.

~ Saranghaeyo,

Sica-ah’

‘Unnie! I can always count on you to cover for me in front of Taeyeon unnie when I’ve stolen food from the fridge. I know sometimes I am too much of a jokester and not serious when I should be, and I know I never quite tell you this…but you mean a lot to mean unnie. I love you.

~ <3

Yoona’

‘Sunny unnie, I never thanked you for those nights that you slipped into my room to quietly sit there and watch me sleep to keep me company when Tiffany unnie was in the hospital. You made sure I was tucked in right and wiped my tears when I cried in my sleep. Unnie…I confess, some of those times, I was awake. But I couldn’t bring myself to open my eyes and acknowledge your presence. I found I didn’t know how to comfort you. I knew you too were hurting, but you were more concerned for me than yourself. I am sorry for being unable to be there for you when you so faithfully stood by my side. Unnie, next time, let me be the one to tuck you in and wipe your tears. I promise I will do better.

~ I love you unnie,

Your dear Seohyunnie’

‘I like that I can rest my chin on your shoulder Sunny-ah. I like that I am just that slightly taller so that my body can frame yours. I like that my arms rest in just the right place on your waist. I like…

~ In between…

Taeng’

Sunny stared at the last words.

‘In between…’

In between love for a sister and like for…

Sunny smiled quietly to herself as the girls continued to play on the machine, shouting like children on a sugar-rush. She lightly rubbed her thumb and forefinger against the paper, sliding her thumb over the word…‘between…’

Between is nice. Between is good. I like being in between Kim Taeyeon. In between…with you…

Sunny packed the eight little bobble figurines into her duffle bag. Suddenly she felt a comforting presence behind her. She didn’t even have to look to know who it was. Sunny backed up into a familiar warmth, a familiar form, a familiar scent.

Pale arms went around waist. Chin resting on shoulder.

“Sunny-ah…”

“Hmm…?”

“I like this…”

This…me holding you, my arms around you, my chin on your shoulder…I like this Sunny-ah.

“…I do too…”

This…you holding me, your arms around me, your chin on my shoulder…I like this Taeng.

“I will miss you…”

“Just like you will miss everyone else.”

“Yes…”

And no…I will miss you half like I miss all the other girls. But the other half…I will miss the other half differently. In between Sunny-ah.

“It’s just a week Taeng.”

“Yes, just a week.”

“Come on you danshins! Sunny’s ride is here! And Taeng, it’s starting to snow a little more heavily, you should head out now. Are you sure you’re ok to drive?” Sooyoung called out.

Taeyeon and Sunny broke away. But there was no reluctance in their separation, no matter how good the physical presence of the other felt. They were in between. Not yet here and not yet there. They had no right to be reluctant yet.

“Yes I will be fine. The wheels, have they bee–”

“Winterized. Yes. Ahjussi made sure of it,” Tiffany confirmed.

“Then yea, no worries. The highway usually doesn’t collect snow much with all that traffic anyways,” Taeyeon reasoned.

“Make sure to text all of us when you get safely home. In fact, I want all of you to text the rest of us when you get home ok?” Jessica said as she shouldered her duffle bag. Her parents had already picked up Krystal and they were waiting outside in the family car.

The rest of the girls were leaving now. Tiffany handed a Ziploc bag full of cookies to each girl as they left. There was a massive hugging fest all around and then the crowd started to thin.

“Bye Ppany. Call me if anything. Now that I have wheels, I can even come pick you up and you can stay at my house!”

“I’ll be sure to call if I start feeling the need to boost my self-confidence about my height any time during the break kid-zombie.”

“YAH! You wanna swim wif dah feeshes to-ah-night-ah?!”

“Just go Taengster! I’ll see you in a week or so,” Tiffany said as she rudely kicked Taeyeon in the and shoved her out the door still muttering gangster threats.

Then, it was just Jessica and Tiffany left.

The brunette turned to give Tiffany a quick but passionate hug.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come home with me? Appa and umma would really like y–oomph!”

“I’m sure. I want this time alone. Don’t worry about me,” Tiffany murmured after she stopped Jessica’s questions with a quick kiss.

“Tell your mom and dad I said hi and wish them Merry Christmas for me. Though I think I will probably call your family the day of the say it myself anyways. Get home safe ok?”

“M’k…lo–”

“No words Jessi.”

“Steph…”

 Tiffany leaned in to capture pink lips once more.

“I love you Jessica.”

“Yah…I was supposed to say it first…you cheated…” Jessica breathed, her face inches from Tiffany’s, her cheeks and neck flushed with their proximity and Tiffany’s hot breath all over her skin.

Tiffany chuckled.

“I’ve never played fair…”

“I love you Stephanie. Take care of yourself. I love you…”

“Mmmhmm…now go before your parents have to wait too long,” Tiffany gently pushed Jessica towards the door, patting the brunette’s as she went.

Jessica shot Tiffany a naughty look and wriggled her a little before mouthing those three words once more.

And then she too, was gone.

…

…

…

Tiffany stood there looking at the closed door for a few minutes before moving towards the Christmas tree and laying underneath it, just like she had with Jessica last night.

Just like she used to with her brothers and Lexi.

Her hand reached out to grab at a small rectangular wrapped gift, the size of a novel.

I will see you again before you know it Jessi.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Tiffany got Taeyeon’s text as she was finishing up her chicken stir-fry.

‘Got home safe and sound! The wheels are seriously top notch girls. When we get back, I am taking each of you out for a spin! THANKS!!!!’

“Whelp! That’s the last of them. They’re all home safe,” Tiffany mumbled to herself as she turned off the stove.

Dinner was quiet.

But Tiffany didn’t mind.

She had always liked silence, even as a child. Her mom and dad would often find her curled up in their living room on her huge lime-green beanie chair by the bookcase, reading a book or just sleeping there with baby Lexi-belle curled up on her chest.

It wasn’t that she didn’t miss the raucous whirlwind of action that was the other girls, but sometimes, she just liked the calm tranquility of…nothingness.

It was cleansing in a way.

…

…

…

After dinner, Tiffany set about poking around their small storage room.

Apart from a small chest of drawers that belonged to Sooyoung and some other small random trinkets and thingamajigs, there really wasn’t much.

Tiffany pulled out her phone and called Sooyoung.

“Hey! Sooyoung!”

“Hellope! Did you wanna come over?! My dad just got home! We can come pick you up!”

“No-no I’m really ok. I’m just calling to ask about your chest of drawers in the storage room. You’re always complaining about not having enough space for your clothes. Do you want me to move things around a little in your room and somehow fit the chest of drawers in too?”