September 25th, 2013

Tiffany showed up on the doorstep of Nayeong and Jaesung’s apartment.

She had gotten a rather distraught call from Jaesung saying that Nayeong was feeling under the weather. The young doctor had surgeries lined up back to back to back and there was no way he could possibly be home to take care of his ailing girlfriend. So he ended up having to called Tiffany to see if she could go over and give Nayeong some TLC.

Any questions Tiffany had asked as to what was wrong with Nayeong had gone glossed over and unanswered. Jaesung had seemed flustered and in some amounts of distress. He did mention that it had taken everything for him to convince Nayeong to stay at home. They had even gotten into a fight concerning this. Jaesung was obviously concerned with Nayeong’s health and well-being, even more than any other boyfriend would seeing as he was a doctor. But Nayeong had insisted on going back to work. It was only until Jaesung had begged his stubborn girlfriend, practically in tears that Nayeong had finally acquiesced and decided to take some time off for herself.

But despite the fact that Jaesung was incredibly upset with everything, upset with the argument he had with Naeyong, upset with Nayeong’s health condition, upset with not being able to be there to care for his loved one…he refused to give Tiffany any details, saying that if she wanted to know, it was up to her to ask Nayeong and for Nayeong to be the one to divulge the information.

Nothing Tiffany said could sway the man’s determination.

‘Ask her. Please just ask her yourself. And…please…be gentle to her. I think at this point in time, you will be great for her, even more so than me.’

Jaesung’s words had struck a chord of fear into Tiffany’s heart, but the man had been quick to soothe those fears, saying Nayeong was in no immediate harm.

‘Just go see her. Please.’

Tiffany luckily didn’t have a schedule today. Ahjussi had somehow heard of her little incident of stitch popping and had pushed SNSD’s already delayed schedule even further back.

‘I build my company on your backs. Do you take me for a big enough fool to run your bodies to the ground and hence run my own business into nothing but rubble? If I hear of any of you pushing your bodies as such again, I will not hesitate to make all nine of you girls live with me and ahjumma just so we can keep an eye on you! All those empty rooms in our houses could use with some life anyways.’

That last part had been said with much smiles and a joking air, but all the girls could tell that their ahjussi was not beyond doing something as radical as such just to keep an eye on them. The girls had all gathered around their ‘appapa’, a term Sooyoung had coined their president as a prominent second father figure in all their lives. The burly man had spread his arms wide and tried his best to gather all eight girls into his arms while Tiffany stood a little off to the side, just observing. The girls had murmured promises into Mr. Lee’s big broad chest, assuring him they would take good care of themselves. When they all finally pulled away, the girls watched their appapa slowly and deliberately make his way towards Tiffany, the man’s compassionate eyes never leaving Tiffany’s more grave solemn ones.

“I will skin you alive if you ever pull a stunt like that again you babo,” Mr. Lee said seriously as he tenderly kissed Tiffany’s forehead before wrapping the girl carefully into his embrace, being extra cautious not to aggravate her wounds.

Tiffany said nothing.

She just hugged back.

And that was more than enough.

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Behind them, Jessica could not hold back her tears.

This image. The one of Tiffany being loved by her father, hugged by him, kissed by him, cared for by him. This was right. This was how it should have turned out.

This is how it should have been in the first place.

Tiffany would always first and foremost be ahjussi’s beloved little girl and daughter even if he would never be grated the title of ‘father’ or ‘dad’. Everyone knew Mr. Lee loved Tiffany, Nayeong and Lexi-belle as his own. As. Not ‘like’. Because the man had long since anchored the three girls into his own heart, etching them deep into his very being. Even if Lexi was no longer with them, Mr. Lee had never seen that little girl as any less than the other two. She was just as prominent in is life and Mr. Lee thanked the good Lord everyday that he had been given a chance to know and love the child.

And since the fan attack and Tiffany’s hospitalization as a result, Mr. Lee had only grown even more possessive and protective over Tiffany. It was not an uncommon sight to see the man hovering around the girls’ practice rooms as they trained, his face often furrowed and concerned with Tiffany’s health and well-being. Mrs. Lee had also made it her job to often drop by with homemade meals for all the girls, hoping to keep them all well-fed and nourished.

Amidst all this extra care and obvious special treatment for Tiffany and the other girls of SNSD, there would have arisen much complaints of dissent from the other board members, namely Mrs. Kang had the president not first addressed the issue. In a rather dramatic way too.

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“I am aware of the rumors and words of dissent amongst the trainees and the idols concerning my ‘special treatment’ of the SNSD girls and specifically one Hwang Tiffany. I now lay those rumors to rest with this announcement that will be soon made public to the trainees, the idols, and even the press. I, Lee Sooman, have officially taken in all nine girls of SNSD as well as one Lee Nayeong as my goddaughters. The guardians of all parties concerned have been approached and have given their consent. The girls, all ten of them, are now my goddaughters as well as one being my niece by blood. I am but fulfilling my protective and caring role towards those I now publically acknowledge as my goddaughters. There is not one of you here who can tell me that I am giving preferential treatment because I am merely fulfilling my obligation to my dependents. Is there anything else that you feel has not been cleared up?”

There was not one word uttered that day in the boardroom.

“Mrs. Kang. You are often so vocal about your views, what do you think about this situation?”

“…” Mrs. Kang had nothing to say.

In Korea, family ties are considered very important and it is an important role for elders to care for and guide the younger generation in their path. Mr. Lee now had every green light to give whatever preferential treatment to SNSD and hence Hwang Tiffany with no one able to say anything about it.

Mrs. Kang had never expected the president to take such drastic measures to protect said Hwang Tiffany. She had completely underestimated the salience that Tiffany had in Mr. Lee’s life.

There was nothing she could do or say.

“Great! Meeting adjourned!”

The next day, the press had gone crazy with the president of SM’s personal released statement about his acquiring ten new goddaughters. Most other trainees and idols within SM were actually rather delighted to hear of the news as they too had been outraged with the attack on SNSD that day in the change rooms. Many of them saw this move by the president as a way of putting a public claim on the girls.

Mr. Lee was basically saying ‘touch these girls and you deal with me personally’. He was laying personal claim on them, declaring his protection of them to the world.

Of course there were the few who were rather upset with this surprising change of events, but it was not like they could have done anything about it.

Tiffany herself was at first unwilling to enter into such an agreement. In a way, she was still slightly uncomfortable with giving ahjussi the title of ‘godfather’ in her life, even though she knew ahjussi would never push that on her. He was simply trying to protect her and she was beyond grateful. But she couldn’t help but feel this was somewhat of a cop-out from a full-on adoption and still somehow allowing Mr. Lee to overtake her father’s place in her life. Nevertheless, after much fervent assurance from ahjussi that it was all in title and that it would mean nothing more than that…Tiffany relented.

Goddaughter of Lee Sooman…

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The sound of shuffling behind the door snapped Tiffany out of her thoughts. Regardless of her scheduling, she would have ditched practice even if she had obligations.

Nayeong was immeasurably more important.

The door swung slowly open to reveal a wan looking Nayeong, still in her loose t-shirt sleepwear.

She seemed surprised to see Tiffany. Jaesung must not have told her she was coming.

One look at Nayeong told Tiffany that she was not in the best shape. The older woman looked tired and spent. Not just physically, but mentally also. There was a slightly veiled sorrow hidden beneath doll-like eyes; the look of someone who had lost someone close to them. A look Tiffany had seen many times before. A look she herself had made…many times before.

Who or what had Nayeong lost?

As far as Tiffany knew, Nayeong had no ‘family’ apart from that bastard. Her mother had died when she was but a child and Nayeong had never made mention of any relatives.

Regardless, that was not the point now.

Tiffany lost no time in carefully scooping Nayeong into her arms, carrying the older woman bridal style back into the warmth, comfort, and safety of her apartment. She seemed frail. And in some inexplicable way…possibly even more frail than when Tiffany had held her that day when Gura had attacked her. Then, Nayeong had been broken and shattered, almost not aware of her surroundings. But this time…she seemed almost too much aware, like she was feeling every pain with cruel clear alacrity.

Tiffany didn’t say a word.

She would not ask.

Nayeong didn’t need her to be nosy right now.

She just needed to be taken care of.

Tiffany laid the woman on her messy and unkempt bed and tenderly tucked her in.

That fact alone was telling of the condition Nayeong was in. The woman was usually adamant about neatness and cleanliness. It had been a habit that came with her profession. Keeping a café meant keeping things clean and immaculate, and it had leaked over into her domestic life.

Nayeong was not one to leave a bed without first making it. She was not one to leave dirty dishes in the sink or dirty clothes and towels lying around on the ground. That and coupled with the fact that she was still in her sleepwear, her hair mussed and eyes bleary, it told Tiffany that something was indeed wrong with her doll.

That sent a pang through her heart.

She had been so preoccupied with herself, so caught up in her own little delusional world of ‘guilt’ that she had not only ignored those who cared for her, she had inadvertently hurt them.

Where was she was Nayeong needed her? Where was she when Nayeong was sick and needed care? Where was she?

Tiffany quickly moved towards the kitchen and put on the kettle for tea.

By the time she returned to the bedroom, Nayeong had her face burrowed into Jaesung’s pillow, hugging the pillow like the man himself was actually there beside her.

Tiffany quietly slipped in next to the sleeping woman, gently brushing back a few fringes of hair that were straying into her face. Nayeong whimpered into the pillow but didn’t much acknowledge Tiffany’s presence. The younger girl glanced around at the apartment around her.

It was a mess.

But not in a casual, messy-living kind of way.

Things were thrown haphazardly all over the floor, photos were flipped down so their smiling happy faces could not be an eyesore to a hurting heart; Tiffany even spotted a sharp shard of white porcelain on the hardwood floor. Someone had missed a spot while cleaning up something someone had smashed. And Tiffany had a good inkling that it was done of deliberate intentions.

Nayeong and Jaesung had a fight.

Tiffany almost couldn’t imagine the two easy-going, mellow, caring and loving individuals getting into such a heated quarrel as to result in the slight trashing of their apartment. Her doll was not one to be quick to react to anger and Jaesung had always been more than patient and caring of Nayeong.

Suddenly beside her, Nayeong clutched at her lower abdomen and whimpered in pain. Tiffany’s senses were suddenly switched on high alert. She hovered over Nayeong.

“Tell me exactly where it hurts,” Tiffany demanded softly, not wanted to scare the woman.

“Nothing-nothing. It’s nothing,” Nayeong gasped, clutching her stomach even tighter as the pain increased.

“Nayeong this isn’t nothing!” Tiffany growled, already moving to hoist Nayeong up to carry her to the door. She was going to take the stupid stubborn woman to the hospital.

“No! It’s nothing! This is normal!” Nayeong shrieked in anguish, the tears in her eyes finally starting to fall.

“Unless you’re having severe menstruation cramps, this is not normal Yeongie…” Tiffany tried again, slipping her hands underneath Nayeong’s slight body, but Nayeong simply swatted her hands away and cried even harder.

“It is…it’s normal…normal…normal for a…mis…miscarriage…”