After spending one night in the hospital you were allowed to go home. Your parents on the other hand had been staying in a Hotel in Gangnam since your apartment wasn't as big and didn't have enough rooms to house everyone, but that was entirely okay since your parents both made enough money to pay for it without any problems. You were told to take a rest from work for a couple of days since you still could experience some nausea and dizziness from the medication you were currently on. Everything, it wasn't easy for you at all. Everywhere you went outside you were reminded of your miscarriage. Suddenly your environment was surrounded with babies everywhere and you just couldn't deal with it, even though you had no choice but to deal with it at some point no matter how hard it was for you to move on. Jonghyun has been the most amazing boyfriend you could ask for taking care of you when you needed him to and stayed with you whenever you asked him. This loss wasn't something that was only affecting you, it was effecting him just as much. He tried all that he could to convince you that everything was going to be alright and that you shouldn't give up on wanting to have children in the future. He was right. It wasn't the end of everything. You weren't infertile. You probably would only have some difficulties to conceive. So what? You might have to try a few more times than other women, Jonghyun assured you that no matter what happens, he would be by your side and that someday in the future, you would make an amazing mom. After being depressed for a couple of days, you tried to pick up your normal life again except that you weren't allowed to work until the doctor told you to. One part of you didn't mind because you got to spend some quality time with your parents since you haven't seen them since the day you left for Seoul. After all, you spent a wonderful Christmas with your family, your best friend, your boyfriend and your in laws. Lucky for both you and Jonghyun, the elders got along with each other pretty well and were making future plans while you and Jonghyun just enjoyed each other's presence. For the sake of everything you wanted to keep your miscarriage between you, Jonghyun and your parents. At least for now. When the time would be right to talk about it, you just might.
 

As Christmas passed, the New Year was about to make its entrance. While you were preparing food in the kitchen with Key, Chloe and your mom, Jonghyun went out with your dad to get some champagne and groceries before everything closed down. You and your mom were preparing the lasagna, a secret recipe only you two used. Of course it was somehow in your blood to be good at making pasta. Your mom was Italian after all and moved to Tampa, Florida when she was only two years old. With a little bit of Italian blood running through your veins there was no wonder you were as good as your mom when it came to preparing Italian dishes. "It looks good" Key smiled admiring the ready to be put in the oven lasagna. "It's a secret family recipe" you shrugged. "Ah it is?" Key chuckled. "I am pretty sure it tastes as good as it looks" he complimented your cooking skills. "I hope so" you smiled and looked at the clock on the wall. "They should be here any minute" and shoved the lasagna into the oven. Just when you did, your dad and Jonghyun walked back in. "Hey?!" you smiled greeting your boyfriend kissing his lips trying to release him from some groceries he was holding. "It's okay, I got it" Jonghyun smiled at you. "I just wanted to help" you pouted walking back into the kitchen and started to clean up the mess you made preparing the lasagna and snacks for the evening. Jonghyun shook his head and put the groceries down on the counter and followed you into the kitchen and surprised you with a back hug. "You're mad now?" he whispered in your ear kissing your cheek. You shook your head. "No, but why is everyone treating me like I have some handicap and that I am suddenly not able to do anything myself?" Jonghyun turned you around to make you look at him. "Sweetie we're just trying to be considerate. We all know what the doctor said." "I know I know" you sighed resting your hands on your boyfriend's chest. "I am fine really. I feel good enough to pick up the daily things in life again" you convinced your boyfriend. "Mhm, are you really?" Jonghyun asked carefully taking your face between his hands. "Baby listen, the last thing we want is to make you feel uncomfortable" and stared you in the eyes as if he was looking right through you knowing what you were really feeling. "I just don't want you to rush into keeping yourself occupied because you want to forget what happened and don't want to be confronted with it. Give yourself some time". "Do you really have to bring this up again?" you raised your voice clearly hurt pushing down Jonghyun's hands ready to walk away from the conversation. "Lauren?" Jonghyun started calmly grabbing your hand. "You know that is not what I meant". "Then why can't you just leave it? You have no idea how it feels" you shouted on the verge of crying and pulled yourself away from Jonghyun's grip heading into your bedroom locking yourself in.

Key just looked at Chloe giving her a confused look not knowing what was going on and why you were trying to pick a fight with your boyfriend which doesn't seem to be your thing to do. "Lauren?" Jonghyun murmured going after you knocking on the door. "Open the door please". "Go away and leave me alone" you shouted between your sobs. Your mom carefully approached Jonghyun. "Don't take it to heart. She's not herself right now. Don't blame her" she calmly comforted Jonghyun. "I am not blaming her even one bit. We lost our baby. We're both affected. I know she's hurt even though she's trying to convince me or herself that she's okay when I know she's not. I just wish she could tell me how she really feels instead of pushing me away or giving me the silent treatment" Jonghyun vented. "Baby?" Key whispered looking at Chloe giving her a shocked look. He for sure didn’t see that one coming. "Hyung?" and wanted to approach Jonghyun. Chloe shook her head grabbing Key's arm. "Don't and please don't discuss this with the others? You really can't tell this to them until Jonghyun and Lauren are ready to talk about it themselves. It’s up to them if they want to tell the others. It’s not our place to". Key just frowned looking a bit lost. "But how? They've been just dating for a little longer than four months maybe?" "Well it doesn't take much to get pregnant you know. One time can be enough and in this case it was. Either way, don't say a word. Promised? I'll explain it to you later" Chloe convinced him. Key nodded. "Okay, I will not say a word. But please tell me they will not continue to fight? Somehow I just can't stand it. They're one of those couples that found each other and will grow old together". "We can't control them and all couples fight sometimes. Even though this is the first time I really see my best friend pick a fight, but I can't blame her. I can't imagine how she feels. No matter what they are also one of those couples that will figure it out. They're made for each other so they will” Chloe continued pulling Key back into the kitchen. "Let's give them some space mhm?"

Your mom took Jonghyun into the living room and made him sit down in the couch sitting next to him. "This year has been extremely painful. She lost her brother six months ago. A few days ago she lost your baby and on top of that she has to deal with PCOS while she always talked about being a young mom and have four children of her own. She feels she's being robbed from everything she has and loves right now. She will come and talk to you about her feelings when she's ready. Just give her some time and space. Don't be mad at her" she convinced him squeezing the back of his hand to assure him it was alright. Jonghyun shook his head. "I am not mad at her. Not even close. I love her too much, how can I be mad?" and a small smile appeared on his face. "I am just hurt that she is hurt. I don't know what to do or how to let her know that everything will be alright and that I am not going anywhere and that I will always be there for her. I feel helpless". "Just be there for her and love her" your mom smiled at Jonghyun. "But you already do so I am not worried about that" and shrugged. "She's crazy about you and I can see why. You're a good guy. You two will work things out" and she went back into the kitchen to check on the lasagna. Jonghyun just stared at your bedroom door how it was still locked and released a big sigh.

While Chloe and your mom were preparing the table for dinner, the lasagna was ready as well. The only person missing however was you. "Doesn't she have to come out to eat?" Key asked worried knowing you were still inside your room and worried you wouldn’t want to eat. "I'll go" Jonghyun insisted approaching your room carefully knocking. "Lauren? Dinner's ready. Can you open the door? Please?" he carefully asked. No response at first. Just when Jonghyun wanted to knock a second time, the door slowly opened and found you in the door post with red puffy eyes. You looked at Jonghyun and broke down again feeling guilty you attacked your boyfriend while all he did was be there for you. "I'm so sorry" you sobbed stepping closer wrapping your arms tightly around his waist digging your face into his chest. Jonghyun wrapped his arms around y